Going on my first date in 5 years and my 2nd in my entire life tomorrow. Any advice? UPDATE: :francis:

[Savvir]

So I went on the date and I royally fukked up

We met up at the coffeehouse and we ordered some coffee. I tried to pay with cash but the barista said that the place is cashless. I left my card at home and I don't have Google Pay . So my date ended up paying for both of our drinks
I tried to pay her back but she insisted that I don't. We sat down and it was a little awkward even though I tried my best to look cool. We talked about concerts, traveling, our friends, and pets since she brought her dog with her. I tried to be funny by referencing SpongeBob but she said she wasn't the biggest fan of the show. Like she knew most of the references but she just wasn't that much into it. She's a fan of Kendrick and hated Drake so they were some commonalities and she fukks with Omar Apollo and went to his concert. But she mixed up ScHoolboy Q and Jay Rock when I told her that I went to his concert during the summer.



We went to the record store next door and I tried to show her some of the records I'm into. She was like "that's cool!" She told me me her dad's birthday was coming up and that her dad was into 70s soul music so she got some Bill Withers, Etta James, and Marvin Gaye and I was so I showed her Curtis Mayfield's debut album and she said she didn't recognize any of the songs but she'll check them out. But we were mainly doing our own thing but checking out records separately.

When it was time to go, I didn't knew what was the appropriate goodbye gesture and reached in for a fist bump but she said "let's just hug!" We did and we went our separate ways but I had the face as I walked toward my car.

I doubt I'm getting a second date

She didn’t accept the fist bump and WANTED a hug.

With the limited skill set you have, You did great.

Whenever you have an event or plan for something bigger, hit her up and invite her along. Don’t make it a date with the sole purpose to go out with her. Make it more like an invitation to join you on something you would do even if you didn’t know her.

 

[Wildin]

I heard that women like it when men have a clear set plan on dates and know what the fukk they're doing

Women like men with a sense of direction. As long as your navigating the boat she's down to sail, and when you are in control you can go with the flow or whichever way the wind blows. Like I said things don't always go according to plan, like you experienced forgetting your card.

 

[Wildin]

@JadeB

Spoiler

 

[east]

So I went on the date and I royally fukked up

dw bout it breh, this is a skill based activity and it's also a kind of tradecraft, nobody gets better at those just from reading random internet shytposts. don't beat yourself up about leaving your card at home, doing a dry run (or live run in this case) is the only way to figure out what you need for any given situation. i guarantee you won't be making this mistake ever again, and it's better that you learned with something inconsequential like that instead of, say, a rubber.

hit her back, she sounds like she'd be down for a second date... make her come up with a reason to possibly say no, don't sabotage yourself by doing so for her

and breh, you did better than i would've... as soon as i saw the dog i'd have given it way more attention than her, it would have been over right then

 

[Won Won]

Brought no money, talked about SpongeBob, went to fist bump her after the date

Please tell me it’s a duck blur

 

[F*ckthemkids]

@JadeB

Many a relationship has blossomed from a awkward first date, don't beat yourself up. What you should do, is hit her up today, and ask if she wants to grab dinner tomorrow night. Just relax, and you'll be fine.

 

[Georgiamuscle]

Nikka said he went in for a fist bump

 

[MikelArteta]

Nikka said he went in for a fist bump

Terrorist fist jab

 

[JadeB]

@JadeB

Many a relationship has blossomed from a awkward first date, don't beat yourself up. What you should do, is hit her up today, and ask if she wants to grab dinner tomorrow night. Just relax, and you'll be fine.

A little low on cash right now but I'm starting a new job so I'll try again when I get my first paycheck. Otherwise, I agree

 

[Vandelay]

I do have autism

This explains a lot. I don't have autism, but I can be socially awkward as fukk which I feel can be on the autism spectrum. You just need more practice dating. Not sure what you do for work, but I took a couple of jobs in retail where I had to learn to socialize. I don't look at autism as a physical problem, but more so how you process mentally social cues. You can train yourself, even if it's not your default mode to interact with people.

You're 26 so you can pivot jobs or careers temporarily to help with it. But I would start dating people with no intention of anything happening. Like I wouldn’t even put it above you to date people you're flat out not even attracted to. This will train your mind how to interact with women, even when you run across someone you do like. Women can smell when your thirsty or awkward, and the only way you'll break that is through experience. Being awkward is a confidence killer, but you can learn strategies to prevent it from creeping up. I've even learned, when I can't stop it from coming up, I just double down on it and the audacity of whatever I'm doing supercedes how awkward I might feel, and might even get a laugh or even more likeable to the woman.

You got this. Glad you asked, because some dudes rather walk around dry as fukk and not improve themselves.

Also, go for the hug, not a fist bump. Hug all women like Roland Martin. You want to break that touch barrier to show you are escalating the interaction.

 

[Illuminatos]

She said her friend is a Drake stan and she clowns her all the time for it

Lol you’ll be fine. Plenty of fish in the sea.

 

[Won Won]

Breh, in 2024 if someone is paying for normal shyt in cash it's assumed they are broke.

 

[The_Sheff]

Yes nikka. The woman is gonna assume you budgeted the date and took out the exact amount of cash you can afford to spend. You basically showing her the box you placed the date into and there isn't any chance of stepping outside it.

A woman wants to go on a date and not think money has limited her experience. She wants to think yall can do whatever pops up even if it's spontaneous.

Yeah it sounds stupid but when a woman goes on a date she is projecting her future life with you based on what is presented. On that first date she going though "friend with benefits, husband, one night stand, friend, etc......".


Now obviously I'm not talking about some fast money dude who flashing bands.

 

[JadeB]

Yes nikka. The woman is gonna assume you budgeted the date and took out the exact amount of cash you can afford to spend. You basically showing her the box you placed the date into and there isn't any chance of stepping outside it.

A woman wants to go on a date and not think money has limited her experience. She wants to think yall can do whatever pops up even if it's spontaneous.

Yeah it sounds stupid but when a woman goes on a date she is projecting her future life with you based on what is presented. On that first date she going though "friend with benefits, husband, one night stand, friend, etc......".


Now obviously I'm not talking about some fast money dude who flashing bands.

And it's true cause I was a little low in cash and was on a budget But I didn't knew it came across that way. I leave my card at home sometimes and bring cash with me so I can limit my spending. Especially when I'm having an outing. And yeah she probably was thinking if I'm boyfriend/husband material or fukk buddy material. I'm aiming for friend at the very least

 

[Address_Unknown]

I remember my first hinge date
I told her as soon as I see her i'm gonna put my thumb in her ass
So I picked her up and as soon as she sat down I had my thumb up her thump all the way up the highway​

Suspect Sorcery at it's finest!​