I've decided I'm not signing the birth certificate. What now? (I gave up...)
- Thread starter Fiji Water
- Start date
You da pappy or nah?
Fiji Water
Every moment is an opportunity
I gotta update the thread title lol. Yeah, she's mine but I had to be sure. Even before I knew, I still provided shyt. But I am waiting for the ink to dry on the paperwork. Now the real fun begins.
does some part of you wish it wasnt yours… did i correctly ready that 3 other nikkas (that you know of) hit it raw?
Fiji Water
Every moment is an opportunity
Aight. Y'all gotta read the thread a bit. We at the part where the baby is mine, I do a lot of not the most, and I filed for paternity lol.
Fiji Water
Every moment is an opportunity
Quoted for reference for the people that only read the OP but jumping to the end.Here's how it's going
So at this point I'm with my daughter about 5 days a week (honestly more), paying for about 75% of all expenses. Got a decent job and finished moving to a better apartment in the middle of next month. Things are going a lot better!
I had a project to work on out of state so I was gone for about a week or so. When I came back the check was basically begging me to take over baby duty 24/7.
It's not exactly a walk in the park but I'm definitely doing what I'm supposed to be doing.
Now here are some fun facts.
One of the dudes that she cheated on me with died in the hospital. It was not pleasant at all. She told me about it and all I said was rip. But she keeps bringing it up and I had to finally tell her to fall back I don't really want to have a conversation about that.
She finally asked me if I'm happy that the dude is dead. I just remain completely silent.
Ever since then she's been trying her hardest to actually get back with me sexually. Like there's no end to the toxicity LOL.
She went from telling me that I'll never be around my kid and that I'm this crazy messed up person to now being mad when I'm not around and wanting to jump in bed with me. I just ignore it. I've been using the gray rock method that people use. to deal with narcissists.
I've been keeping on my personal business to myself and playing everything close to the chest. But I did file the declaration of paternity, so that takes about 60 days to kick in legally.
At first she was cool with it but lately she's been upset and even "threatened" me with 100% custody. I mean that in the sense that I would have full custody.
It's this type of erratic stuff that's going to have me going to court.
Sidebar: not sure where some of the clowns in here are thinking I'm trying to duck something lmao. I did the DNA myself six months ago. She asked me to leave ie kicked me out so I left. All the while I was gone, just sent baby stuff via Amazon.
It appears she thought her man was gonna replace me as a father but of course, that didn't happen. So now she doesn't have the income to fully care for the kids, mines or her previous ones.
So now it's a whole new set of pitfalls because she wants to mix our previous relationship with the parenting relationship since everyone else lamed out.
Overall, I'm just focused on staying focused because that seems to be working best for my kid and me.
And honestly I do too much but at least I'm aware. Like I'll go see or pick up my daughter, and her mom will ask if I can take out the trash or do some other task.
So I do it. For a fee.if I feel like it.
Fun times!
Congrats on your little bundle of love breh. Regardless of the status of you and the mom that child is your blessing. Cherish her forever!
Fiji Water
Every moment is an opportunity
I really do! She looks exactly like me and she just naturally has so many of the same mannerisms and expressions. I don't worry too much about having a bad relationship or being a bad parent because we are pretty much inseparable.
Honestly that's what gives me the strength to keep everything so cool no matter how her mom or any other parties might act or react.
I moved past it, but honestly the biggest hurdle for me was why somebody would want to try to keep my kid from me and do all this crazy stuff. Like, literally try to sabotage my life so I can't provide for my kid.
It's all good though I literally fukked it out. There were parts I was on the street. I'm still couchsurfing technically until I move into my new apartment. Like I'm literally just carrying around a bag full of work clothes and ball shorts and pretending like I'm a regular 9 to 5 professional.
If the situation was reversed I don't believe that she could do the same. I mean I hope she would be able to but I don't think she'd be able to do it like I've done it. I have some really good friends but I don't have a lot of family support or a bunch of random ass women that are just going to give me money cuz I fukk them.
Overall doing this whole thing is hard enough just trying to learn how to be a dad. So I honestly pray that nobody has to go through this type of shyt. I have half of mine to try and pass some legislation because women shouldn't even be in a position to treat somebody like this. Nobody should.
Sounds like you are doing better. Big ups.
Based on what you shared, it sounds like you need to establish full custody for the best sake of your child...also for your own sanity.
Provide your child with a secure and stable household. It does not sound like she is able to do that at all.
Keep it business with your child's mother and don't allow yourself to be dragged into fights or drama. You should not even consider sleeping with her again regardless of what she says. But I think you already know that.
Best advise is to practice Islam and not procreate with anyone else outside of marriage.
do you have a lawyer advising youHere's how it's going
So at this point I'm with my daughter about 5 days a week (honestly more), paying for about 75% of all expenses. Got a decent job and finished moving to a better apartment in the middle of next month. Things are going a lot better!
I had a project to work on out of state so I was gone for about a week or so. When I came back the check was basically begging me to take over baby duty 24/7.
It's not exactly a walk in the park but I'm definitely doing what I'm supposed to be doing.
Now here are some fun facts.
One of the dudes that she cheated on me with died in the hospital. It was not pleasant at all. She told me about it and all I said was rip. But she keeps bringing it up and I had to finally tell her to fall back I don't really want to have a conversation about that.
She finally asked me if I'm happy that the dude is dead. I just remain completely silent.
Ever since then she's been trying her hardest to actually get back with me sexually. Like there's no end to the toxicity LOL.
She went from telling me that I'll never be around my kid and that I'm this crazy messed up person to now being mad when I'm not around and wanting to jump in bed with me. I just ignore it. I've been using the gray rock method that people use. to deal with narcissists.
I've been keeping on my personal business to myself and playing everything close to the chest. But I did file the declaration of paternity, so that takes about 60 days to kick in legally.
At first she was cool with it but lately she's been upset and even "threatened" me with 100% custody. I mean that in the sense that I would have full custody.
It's this type of erratic stuff that's going to have me going to court.
Sidebar: not sure where some of the clowns in here are thinking I'm trying to duck something lmao. I did the DNA myself six months ago. She asked me to leave ie kicked me out so I left. All the while I was gone, just sent baby stuff via Amazon.
It appears she thought her man was gonna replace me as a father but of course, that didn't happen. So now she doesn't have the income to fully care for the kids, mines or her previous ones.
So now it's a whole new set of pitfalls because she wants to mix our previous relationship with the parenting relationship since everyone else lamed out.
Overall, I'm just focused on staying focused because that seems to be working best for my kid and me.
And honestly I do too much but at least I'm aware. Like I'll go see or pick up my daughter, and her mom will ask if I can take out the trash or do some other task.
So I do it. For a fee.
Fun times!
Because like you signing the certificate, you aren't a priority. I started a thread about teen crime and I find that more interesting.
Fiji Water
Every moment is an opportunity
I am a fukking lawyer. Y'all ain't catch that?
Even if there is peace record (video and audio ) all interactions with her. (Set up a google voice number very easy to record calls and have em on the google cloud) And never hand out cash without a receipt. Also don't let her stay at your crib , if y'all ain't fukking or you ain't got no cameras indoors. With this new 
me too wave you could easily be set up. be super cordial, extra nice even when she wilds out you stay cool 
knowing you recording everything. Be specially careful when you have a new main female around or when you get a promotion, or buy something new for you, keep that info to yourself cause thats when she is going to wild out. And I mean this in the politest way possible don't post no Info on social media. Don't follow her or if you already do. Don't fall for no okie doke and respond to nothing specially on mother's and Father's day.
me too wave you could easily be set up. be super cordial, extra nice even when she wilds out you stay cool knowing you recording everything. Be specially careful when you have a new main female around or when you get a promotion, or buy something new for you, keep that info to yourself cause thats when she is going to wild out. And I mean this in the politest way possible don't post no Info on social media. Don't follow her or if you already do. Don't fall for no okie doke and respond to nothing specially on mother's and Father's day.
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SIGN language. This is the “N” part of it
