The "Black women have limited options to pick from" narrative

[agnosticlady]

@thewiz703

What you think?

Gender Wars/War Room
We Ain't shyt
Please Love Me

:intradesting:

That smilie though

 

[lightbearerchef]

@thewiz703

What you think?

Gender Wars/War Room
We Ain't shyt
Please Love Me

:intradesting:

I say all of em fit

 

[Arishok]

You can quote me but you can't text back

 

[miranda]

So you say that street nikkas are attractive? And dudes with 9-5s are lames? @mamba

no i did not say that. I said men that are not sexually attractive need to stop crying that women arent checking for them just because they have a 9-5.

So you suggest that they should date out?

well sex is a human need, so if you are attracted to them and dont care about having black children, sure. Just dont talk trash about black women, or think you have a "black family". Also dont try to come back to black women to serve as some broodmare or as a backup plan once your nonblack woman divorces you, ive been in this situation and its very annoying.

She is lowkey admitting that she likes "fun" men like street nikkas and men who like to fukk around lol.

i dont date or have sex with "street nikkas" or know cheaters.

She wants her back blown out

whats wrong with that? There are square dudes that go HAM in the bedroom too.

 

[Blackout]

well sex is a human need, so if you are attracted to them and dont care about having black children, sure. Just dont talk trash about black women, or think you have a "black family". Also dont try to come back to black women to serve as some broodmare or as a backup plan once your nonblack woman divorces you, ive been in this situation and its very annoying.

I see.

What if they go with a woman who is mixed with black?

 

[Wild self]

no i did not say that. I said men that are not sexually attractive need to stop crying that women arent checking for them just because they have a 9-5.



well sex is a human need, so if you are attracted to them and dont care about having black children, sure. Just dont talk trash about black women, or think you have a "black family". Also dont try to come back to black women to serve as some broodmare or as a backup plan once your nonblack woman divorces you, ive been in this situation and its very annoying.


i dont date or have sex with "street nikkas" or know cheaters.

whats wrong with that? There are square dudes that go HAM in the bedroom too.

I ain't a square dude nor a hood dude and I can dislocate that spine

 

[miranda]

I see.

What if they go with a woman who is mixed with black?

what are you asking?

I ain't a square dude nor a hood dude and I can dislocate that spine

sounds painful

 

[TMNT4000]

I'm tired:annoy:

 

[The_Truth]

This is one narrative that needs to put to rest.

In comparing non-Black women to Black women vis-a-vis dating/marriage success, the argument that rears its head quite often is BW have fewer options to pick from.

The implication being Black women are actively out here aggressively pursuing and choosing men! No. Black women are entertaining the men who happen to approach them. When most of those options happen to be bums, Black women try to paint all Black men as poor options.

The difference between non-Black women and Black women is that a lot of non-Black women are aggressive in their pursuit of the men they want. They don't just sit back and hope that he falls in their laps.

Black women take a passive approach to dating and hope for success. A lot of non-Black women (especially cacs and some Latinas) take a more proactive approach to get what they want.

There are quality Black men all around. If you aren't getting the type of man you think you deserve, it's probably because you aren't putting in the work to get him or to get him to notice you.

This IS true. Black women, in general, are very adamant about NOT pursuing men. They feel that this is the man's job. Even when you bring up the fact that this may put them at a disadvantage they still refuse to make the first move. Non-black women are a lot more likely to pursue a man if they think he's a good marriage candidate.

This is one of the reasons why many "successful" black men are with non-black women. People assume that these black men specifically pursued the non-black women, but that's not necessarily the case. A lot of these men were pursued BY non-black women because they recognized that they were good husband material. I think part of it is that non-black women are coached by their families on what to look for in a husband. And since most black children are raised by unwed single mothers, black women aren't trained on this. Your mother can teach you how to get a husband if she never had one herself.

 

[Wild self]

what are you asking?



sounds painful

Nah you scream for joy

 

[Kitsch]

@Theraflu

 

[mamba]

This IS true. Black women, in general, are very adamant about NOT pursuing men. They feel that this is the man's job. Even when you bring up the fact that this may put them at a disadvantage they still refuse to make the first move. Non-black women are a lot more likely to pursue a man if they think he's a good marriage candidate.

This is one of the reasons why many "successful" black men are with non-black women. People assume that these black men specifically pursued the non-black women, but that's not necessarily the case. A lot of these men were pursued BY non-black women because they recognized that they were good husband material. I think part of it is that non-black women are coached by their families on what to look for in a husband. And since most black children are raised by unwed single mothers, black women aren't trained on this. Your mother can teach you how to get a husband if she never had one herself.

Good post, breh. And you're absolutely right. In other cultures, women are coached in the art of screening for the right man.

Black American women, especially in this day and age, lack those skills.

Yes. Black men aren't always the ones pursuing non-Black women. Quite often, those women see something they want and go after it.

Good husband material is to most Black women until they hit their 30s.

 

[Elle Driver]

Good post, breh. And you're absolutely right. In other cultures, women are coached in the art of screening for the right man.

Black American women, especially in this day and age, lack those skills.

Yes. Black men aren't always the ones pursuing non-Black women. Quite often, those women see something they want and go after it.

Good husband material is to most Black women until they hit their 30s.

In other cultures, family screens the "right" man.

 

[mamba]

In other cultures, family screens the "right" man.

"Family" and friends try to tell Black women about ain't shyt nikkas all the time.

Black women don't listen. "I loves me some him. "

A broken heart, bad credit and a b*stard child later, she's like and the fam is like .

Black women don't want to listen when it comes to people giving them real talk about the mating game. They think they have it all figured out.

Based on the 70% OOW rate, it's clear they don't.

 

[mamba]

In other cultures, family screens the "right" man.

Even in cultures where family doesn't screen the "right" man, it's highly unlikely the women are going to pop out kids by a jobless, shiftless dude.

A lot of Black women are more than willing to partake in that type of fukkery, mainly because they know they'll get bailed out by another daddy (government).

If they didn't have government to fall back on, I'm sure more thoughtful mating decisions would be made in our community.