Men who got married, aside from religious grounds....

[YaBoy]

Close enough. I would leave and find a woman who did want to get married. There's no point to being in a relationship otherwise.
​

Are you very religious? You seem like you want be married more than you want a woman worthy of marrying?

 

[MeachTheMonster]

There's nothing to admit. A good barber is a good barber regardless of the license just like a good s/o if a good s/o regardless of a marriage license.

And trust comes from time and experiences. Being at a point where you would potentially marry someone means that the trust/love is already solidified in the relatinoship. You can want to be with someone FOREVER without feeling the need to be married. Also I don't see why the "world" has anything to do with a two person relationship.

A good barber is a good barber. But a good barber that refuses to get a licensed is questionable. It's not about the license making him better. The question becomes "why are you not getting a license" "is there something I should worry about" " I like my cuts, but is there something he's not doing right" those types of questions are a big deal when talking about a relationship.

And again I never said the marriage creates the trust. I said the marriage is the pledge of that trust.

You can want to be with someone forever and not want to get married, but again the marriage is the pledge of your intentions. The world has a lot to do with a two person relationship because you are teaming up as one in order to take on "the world"

 

[Dafunkdoc_Unlimited]

Are you very religious? You seem like you want be married more than you want a woman worthy of marrying?

I'm a Theological Noncognitivist. A woman worth marrying (IMO) would want to be married.
​

 

[TLR Is Mental Poison]

Are you very religious? You seem like you want be married more than you want a woman worthy of marrying?

O ho ho you got him now!!!!!

 

[MeachTheMonster]

I think it's a bad example regarding the barber because and maybe this just personal experience I know barbers that don't have their license that still just as good a job as before. I get what your saying (or moreso what your going for) but on this it doesn't make much sense as long as dude still cuts the same IMO. Maybe you can sue (i dont know honestly) but what does a barber having his license have to do with if he can cut or not?

One more time its not about his cutting skills.

The non-license brings up questions especially since he can seemingly cut good. "What's holding him back" "why doesn't he have a license"

I've gotten my haircut by unlicensed people plenty of times. But I knew I was getting a discount, and I wasn't getting some of the perks I would get from a licensed barber at a licensed shop.

You damn sure wouldn't go down some dudes basement and give him $15-$20 for a cut. If we are relating this to relationships/marriage. You damn sure couldn't get/give your all if you are not married. Some people are ok with not getting/giving "all" some people aren't which is why they get married

 

[Ain't That Something]

nikkas In here arguing Just For The Sakes Of it

O ho ho you got him now!!!!!

Which One Is It. Are Gou For Or Against Marriage.

 

[YaBoy]

A good barber is a good barber. But a good barber that refuses to get a liscensed is questionable. It's not about the liscense making him better. The question becomes "why are you not getting a liscense" "is there something I should worry about" " I like my cuts, but is there something he's not doing right" those types of questions are a big deal when talking about a relationship.

And again I never said the marriage creates the trust. I said the marriage is the pledge of that trust.

You can want to be with someone forever and not want to get married, but again the marriage is the pledge of your intentions. The world has a lot to do with a two person relationship because you are teaming up as one in order to take on "the world"

Let's just stop with the barber thing because I don't think you get what I'm trying to say. And I think being in a mutual loving relationship is a pledge of your intentions. Marriage is the only relationship where a certificate is needed to show that. I'd take a bullet for my brother and I'm sure he'd do the same, but we've gotten to that level through our experiences; we don't need a certificate to pledge that

 

[TLR Is Mental Poison]

Let's just stop with the barber thing because I don't think you get what I'm trying to say. And I think being in a mutual loving relationship is a pledge of your intentions. Marriage is the only relationship where a certificate is needed to show that. I'd take a bullet for my brother and I'm sure he'd do the same, but we've gotten to that level through our experiences; we don't need a certificate to pledge that

Marriage is not needed to do that. But it is one of many ways people choose to do that.

 

[MeachTheMonster]

Let's just stop with the barber thing because I don't think you get what I'm trying to say. And I think being in a mutual loving relationship is a pledge of your intentions. Marriage is the only relationship where a certificate is needed to show that. I'd take a bullet for my brother and I'm sure he'd do the same, but we've gotten to that level through our experiences; we don't need a certificate to pledge that

I understand what you are saying. In real life terms outside of legal ramifications the paper means nothing. It's all symbolic and I agree.

I'm saying that symbolism is more important than people in this thread are making it out to be. A lot of what we do is purely for symbolism, and adhering to the symbolism of marriage means a lot to a lot of people. I personaly didn't get it until I got married.

I was with my wife for almost 10 years with two kids before getting married. We got married for legal reasons tax,insurance, ect. But sometime in between walking up to that alter and saying "i do" it all clicked and I udestood the significance of the pledge I was making to my wife. Now when I say "my wife" it holds a much greater significance than saying my girlfriend or baby mamma. Do I love her any different? No. But I think she knows I love her that much more.

 

[Mountain]

So stop all this psuedo shyt.

Here's where your example fukks up and shows your self inflated ego of importance: A professor is in charge of a student's grade. You control nothing, absolutely jack shyt when it comes to someone else's personal life. You or anyone else on here so they can answer to you or anyone else any way they want.

So if someone doesn't answer the question the way you want them to, get over it. You're hella bent over something that doesn't concern you, that you're not an authority on in the least bit.

Got nikkas in here comparin' themselves to university professors and shyt when you're really just as random as the crackhead chillin' on the corner.

How old are you breh? Its called an analogy, Im obviously not suggesting that the married folk here are students and that im a professor in a college marking their papers or that I control their lives, come on man.

The point is the answer I referenced is stupid because its an improper answer to the question, hence why a college professor, hell anyone with a lick of sense, would dismiss it as such. Yes people can 'provide any answer they want' but that doesn't mean the answer they provide will be a proper one.

Again I aint hella bent on sht, its a forum and people discuss, argue points e.t.c. just because I use it for its purpose doesn't mean I'm mad over nothing.

 

[YaBoy]

I understand what you are saying. In real life terms outside of legal ramifications the paper means nothing. It's all symbolic and I agree.

I'm saying that symbolism is more important than people in this thread are making it out to be. A lot of what we do is purely for symbolism, and adhering to the symbolism of marriage means a lot to a lot of people. I personaly didn't get it until I got married.

I was with my wife for almost 10 years with two kids before getting married. We got married for legal reasons tax,insurance, ect. But sometime in between walking up to that alter and saying "i do" it all clicked and I udestood the significance of the pledge I was making to my wife. Now when I say "my wife" it holds a much greater significance than saying my girlfriend or baby mamma. Do I love he any different? No. But I think she knows I love her that much more.

nikka what?

 

[rapbeats]

why did you get married?

I understand some people have strong religious beliefs about kids being born in marriage etc. I understand that.

Aside from that why did you married folks get married?

there is no "without religious grounds."
even those that say so. they are not being honest. or they may not know. the only reason they are choosing to marry or even think about marriage is due to america being birthed out of Christianity more so then any thing else. since thats the case. most people in america believe in God, the bible, or some other religion that endorses marriage.

you have 100% of the society raised in a society thats built off of christian principles(no matter how people actually follow thru with what they do, the principles are there). so this is the only reason why people even THINK about marriage. even if you're an atheist thats thinking about marriage.

now to the other part of what you said, as if you were saying "besides those who have gotten married to make sure they dont raise kids out of wedlock. "

there's another religious reason most people fail to speak on that are believers. especially christians.

husband= God/Christ
Wife = the Church

Ephesians 5:21-32

marriage is a divine institution. Christian marriage has certain commitments, obligations and duties which are symbolic. The roles which God has given to a Christian husband and his wife and not culturally derived, nor are they arbitrarily based. They are intended to symbolize and represent a greater, more fundamental reality. While marriage is temporal, the reality which is symbolizes is eternal. And thus we cannot understand the importance of the duties of the husband or the wife without grasping the reality which Christian marriage is to symbolically communicate. This fundamental reality which underlies and explains the attitudes and conduct of a man and his wife in marriage is the relationship of Jesus Christ to His church. This relationship was not understood clearly in Old Testament times. In Paul’s words, it was a mystery. Now, through the teaching of the Apostle Paul and other New Testament writers, this mystery is clear, and our conduct in marriage is to be a reflection of this mystery.

with all that said. what That above kind of marriage would produce if you have children or even if you dont. those people that watch you two married folk. will look at you as an example of how selfless love is supposed to work from one to another. not only just in marriage. we're all mirrors. if i reflect a positive relationship others that watch me will then have a guideline for other positive relationships. if everyone around you at home or in the streets, that you see on tv, the internet, etc if they mostly have negative relationships it will be difficult for you to only cling to a couple of positive relationships you see and use those as a guideline. odds are you will take more from the negative relationships then from the positive ones. which then you will start to reflect a negative relationship to others watching you. wash, rinse, and repeat.

now if by chance you could take GOD out of the equation and still call yourself married. then its just an idea of two people together for as long as you can stand one another. its purely a contract that can be broken at any time. nothing more, nothing less.

reasons why people on either side (believers and non believers) get married: they have a few things in common:
- not wanting to die alone(but thats assuming you will die before your spouse..bad assumption) ,

- if you get sick having someone to take care of you (like your parent(s) use to).. again bad assumption. .who's to say your spouse doesnt get really ill first then you have to be caretaker).

-wanting to have kids(pieces of yourself in someone else. especially since we all know we cant live on earth forever. so why not have a piece of me out there to continue my legacy (whatever that maybe).

-wanting a lasting companionship, partner in life. life is rough sometimes, therefore it would be nice to have a partner to talk to to console you while you go thru the tough times.

-sexual partner you can trust (he/she wont give you anything cause yall are the only two hittin each other at night), neither of you feel weird about it because you know each other's bodies well. the longer you're together and the more you make love(not have sex, there's a difference). the better you become at it. i know what she like, she knows what i like. everyone is being honest so we both get the best of the best. odds are when you hitting everything out there. there's no time to tell them what you like, and dont like. there's no time to find out what you didnt even know you liked. now you have found out you like that as well. but again this is leaning towards christian marriage because to make love like that you have to be SELFLESS. i care more about You having the best time of your life then i do ME and vice versa.

 

[MeachTheMonster]

nikka what?

You can say "I love you" all day. But standing up and making that pledge to the world is a big deal. Signing your name on a piece of paper that will hold you to that pledge is a big deal. Kinda like written contracts hold more weight than a verbal one. Your intentions might be the same but writing it down sets those intentions in stone. You can't back out of or try to change your pledge, it is written down for the world to see.

 

[Dafunkdoc_Unlimited]

there is no "without religious grounds."

Were it not for religions putting a name to it, we'd still have something akin to 'marriage' just as in nature. Monogamy/fidelity is not the exclusive realm of humanity or religion.​

 

[YaBoy]

You can say "I love you" all day. But standing up and making that pledge to the world is a big deal. Signing your name on a piece of paper that will hold you to that pledge is a big deal. Kinda like written contracts hold more weight than a verbal one. Your intentions might be the same but writing it down sets those intentions in stone. You can't back out of or try to change your pledge, it is written down for the world to see.

We're talking in circles. Agree to disagree