Certified dime piece finally ends the 50/50 debate that had the black community in a chokehold

[King Poetic]

at these same social media topics

We went from second class citizens and now at the bottom of the barrel as a people and these nikkas stay talking about splitting 50/50 when majority of nikkas in real society not on social media can barely keep the lights on by themselves..

A bunch of minimum wage social media people acting like they got it all

 

[SmarkMero]

 

[F*ckthemkids]

I have a homie who’s divorced now. He and his wife had 3 kids. Things were cool for a while until he started going through it. He was literally drowning himself to keep everything in tact since his wife didn’t want to work…even after his kids aged into the school system. Dude cried in front of us talking about it…so we told him while we appreciated him coming to us for support this convo needs to be had with his wife. So he had it…he broke down and cried…she essentially told him to “suck it up” and “do what you have to do to make it work”. No concessions. No compromise on lifestyle. This isn’t a woman with no education or skills…They met in college. All he was asking was that now that all of the kids were in school full time, if she could get a job and help out. And she balked. From that point on the marriage spiraled out of control and ultimately ended. They split custody. They both now work. A slight concession on her end could have saved their marriage.

Now I don’t care if someone feels like the woman in OP does. My issue is are you willing to adjust if your partner needs it? Or are you going to dig in and let shyt die because you’re too stubborn to come off that “I’m not doing 50-50 bullshyt”?

 

[Mike Nasty]

If she's at home taking care of the kids and the home what bills is she expected to pay? and how's she going to do it on her own if she doesn't work? Cool thread though.

 

[Gloxina]

My ex, my youngest's mom, when we were together I made about 60% of our income combined, so I took 60% of the bills. On paper, in actuality I think I did the math once and I was paying about 65-66% of our bills---->so paying well over my share, while she was paying well under...

On top of that, this doesn't account for all the other money spent for her. Any time her car, which was older than mine, had issues, I paid for it. I paid for her gas half the time. She was on my insurance. Treated her by giving her a few hundred a couple times a year...

In actuality I spent well over 70% of the income I earned while I was with her, to ensure her comfortability. Wasn't comfortable for me, I made less than I do now, but I made it work...

At home, she was a far superior cook and enjoys cooking, it's a love language of hers, so she cooked 90% of our food. We split picking up/dropping off the kids, and I did probably 75% of the household cleaning and laundry because I enjoy cleaning, I throw some music on and keep my place tight. She is not a cleaner. We both did homework with the kids, entertained them, disciplined, ran errands...

With all of this?

There were multiple reasons we didn't work out, one of which being, she feels a man should pay for everything---->even if the income levels are similar and it's more taxing for the man to spend all his money. I never bowed to this demand, and it was one of the reasons we couldn't work...

Respondents in this thread are forgetting there are women out here who have a man paying most of the bills AND doing his part as a partner at home, and still shyt on the man because it's not enough...

I know these women exist, I lived it...

In principle, I have 3 daughters. The woman I'm dating isn't one of my children, you are not entitled to a free ride from me if you are not my child. Period. Doesn't matter what my take home pay is...

I make more money now than I did when we were together and I feel the same, ain't shyt changed. I can hold myself down just fine. If a woman wants a sponsor I'm not That Guy, and I'm not the brother she gotta beg to be involved with the kids or household duties, I do all that shyt naturally...

You gotta pay your weigh for something with me though, I could have an annual salary of 10 mil and my opinion on this wouldn't change. Go find the next nikka if you want to keep all your money but spend all mine...

TOTALLY understand, but I don’t think this is an argument about babymommas/new partners. A woman probably isn’t expecting a traditional set up with a man with multiple kids from multiple women— no disrespect.

Just like I wouldn’t think a woman with multiple kids from multiple men would expect to find a man offering traditional marriage (although I’m sure it’s happened somewhere).

This argument is kinda for the unmarried folks who haven’t had kids and have never witnessed healthy marriage dynamics.

 

[SmarkMero]

I’m still tryna figure why so many black women believe doing it by themself is better than 50/50. They’d have 50% more income to spend or save.

I'm stumped on that one too Breh...........

 

[Gloxina]

at these same social media topics

We went from second class citizens and now at the bottom of the barrel as a people and these nikkas stay talking about splitting 50/50 when majority of nikkas in real society not on social media can barely keep the lights on by themselves..

A bunch of minimum wage social media people acting like they got it all

Again- our collective wealth was supposed to drop to 0 by 2050 (I think they said we are improving tho). This shouldn’t really be a discussion at all because majority of Black folks can’t afford the “lifestyle”… but the topic of equitable distribution of housework is legitimate.

 

[King Poetic]

Black people stopped it

These black women( NOT ALL FOR THE READING IMPAIRED )yelling that no 50/50 shyt, is so caught up on TV and Entertainment and putting themselves in these celebrities/athletes/comedians/popular radio DJ shoes…

Average black man making 46k a year and a black woman making 41k a year , talking about not splitting the bills sound stupid as a fukk.. even if you making 70k a year, we both need to build together work together and get structure together as one..

This goes to show u how over the last 30 years since the 90s we have become this IM INDEPENDENT AND DONT NEED ANYONE IF I HAVE TO PAY HALF.. u sound stupid as fukk

 

[Gloxina]

I’m still tryna figure why so many black women believe doing it by themself is better than 50/50. They’d have 50% more income to spend or save.

Lol if we are purely discussing numbers- you are absolutely correct.


Women are talking about the added labor that comes with creating a household.
If we are splitting finances and housework— everything’s cool!
If we are splitting finances and I’m working throughout my pregnancy, have kids, go back to work, and I’m doing the majority of child rearing, housework, etc while you are mainly chilling in the evenings after work- that’s when it is a problem.

There are women who complain because that’s what their marriages are like.


If you marry a good dude who doesn’t think it’s beneath him to pick up a mop then, frankly, there isn’t a problem

 

[Hamsterdam921]

Straight up easy engagements and we fall for it every time

 

[Dwayne_Taylor]

It's a stupid strawman. No one is saying women should pay half the bills and take care of the home and children by themselves. Men have been helping with domestic duties and children for decades

 

[Koli_Kat]

I’m still tryna figure why so many black women believe doing it by themself is better than 50/50. They’d have 50% more income to spend or save.

Pride

 

[murksiderock]

TOTALLY understand, but I don’t think this is an argument about babymommas/new partners. A woman probably isn’t expecting a traditional set up with a man with multiple kids from multiple women— no disrespect.

Just like I wouldn’t think a woman with multiple kids from multiple men would expect to find a man offering traditional marriage (although I’m sure it’s happened somewhere).

This argument is kinda for the unmarried folks who haven’t had kids and have never witnessed healthy marriage dynamics.

You're right in theory---->but the reality is the unmarried, childless people aren't the only ones having this conversation...

I lived it sis, a woman with multiple kids from multiple men, who expected a traditional set-up at home...

Now, I've considered maybe I just got a bad apple. Maybe most of us with kids aren't the way she is. But the fact that she exists let's me know there are other women like her....

My oldest kids' mother isn't like this. She wants to be a stay at home mom but she never felt that she had no duty to help financially so this conversation never came up with her, and like with my next after her, I took care of the majority of finances and pulled my weight at home...

 

[Forsaken]

The real surprise is getting the same results whether you paying all or half.

The only effective method I have found is to make substantially more than the person your dating. I think subconsciously they know you don't need them and can be replaced.

 

[Voice of Reason]

Black feminism was clearly designed to destroy the Black family and I agree with equal rights for women.

But you don't hear this debate as much with other races.