The conversation with darkskinned men

[thewiz]

You believe this? I must live in a different world because while yeah dudes say they would date, fukk a white girl or any girl,that look good dudes outright stating they love the coco FOH. That's why I be wondering where these people live at and who they associate with cause they see and hear things that just aren't the norm in my life and anybody else's I know either.

I mean it's possible but I feel you.. only time I really saw nikkas goin crazy bout white girls was in high school but even then they grew out of it.. that shyt is mostly online if you ask me and it's a small percentage of nikkas usually just tryin to get attention

 

[thewiz]

Teen to early 20's these were friends tho, I've only ever had one guy not date me cause im dark.
But the guys that i knew had no problem spouting that shyt even when i was around, they'd be like no offense to you D lol.
I didn't care cause i mean they were just people i hung with. The little ping of hurt was hid behind laughter and forgotten.
The white girl thing is usually sexually, they see how some of them act and think that they are all like that.

You're from south Florida right? I lived in boca and ft lauderdale and everybody I knew was either tryin to talk to dark skin girls or Spanish ones lol

 

[philmonroe]

That's fine that you dontlike how it's framed. Again....this is to open discussion not insults. And most of the guys that posted in this thread have not articulated what the issue is with the article. Just cursing...funnily enough no one resorted to calling the op jealous/bitter.

Its not funny that nobody has resorted to insults because at least in this case the person is saying they get attention which isn't the same as the usual why do black men give attention to exoticals, light skin, white women stuff. Don't know how you can't see that. I think it will start discussion but just not the kind she claims she really wants because of how its framed.

let me stop you there buddy
anyway please let me know what stats there are, I didn't know there were any studies on marriage preferences based on skin color within the black american community
my opinion is based off my personal experiences
dark skinned girls get sex
light skinned girls get commitment

You can't stop me nowhere. I'm just going off what you said so if anything you should stop yourself from implying that about yourself. How can I let you know on some stats when I just said the only way the stuff you was kicking had merit was if there were studies? If I had the studies that proved that I would show it but I didn't say there were studies about that. I know your opinion is based off personal experience but like most people I think you have a very limited experience on this stuff. That's all people use a relative or two and that's their sample size. Hell I walk out the door and the shyt most of y'all kick regarding this is thrown in the bushes regarding this topic. That's why its hard for me to agree with views like your from my perspective.

Yeah but you can't tell other what they see and what they go through. Maybe its like that for you but for some its not.
It is what is, some people let that effect they way they live their lives and some pay it no regards.

I can't tell them what they see I agree with that. I don't think I tell them they don't see it but that their experience is usually limited. Mine isn't superior but hell I at least pay attention to things where I'm at and this stuff isn't even visible anywhere in this country I've been in any significant number. That's just what I believe and if I'm wrong fukk it I'll take that L. I can agree with the second part though.

 

[philmonroe]

I mean it's possible but I feel you.. only time I really saw nikkas goin crazy bout white girls was in high school but even then they grew out of it.. that shyt is mostly online if you ask me and it's a small percentage of nikkas usually just tryin to get attention

Man I just being real I've never saw nobody act crazy about no white girl ever. Like I said dudes would say they'll fukk one or date em if they look good but no extra stuff they wouldn't say about any other girl. Also for me its just hard to put stock in shyt that's so different from what you see on daily basis living and online stuff that's usually waaaaay different from actual things you see.

 

[MoonGoddess]

You're from south Florida right? I lived in boca and ft lauderdale and everybody I knew was either tryin to talk to dark skin girls or Spanish ones lol

Yup, well i don't know what to tell you but those guy were not afraid to state their preference.
Even just listening to a group of guys talking you hear it.
I will say tho we tend to usually remember the negative more than anything, so its probably easy for me to remember the guys that had no problem explicitly expressing their love for lighter girls.
Not to mention my bestfriend was really light so i also got to hear all the stuff guys used to tell her to try and get with her.
Really when i hear some guys say that they like darker girls its never just darker girls they'll say they like all shades.
But when i hear some guys say they like lighter girls they'll say that's all they like.
Im in fort Lauderdale by the way went to Boyd Anderson, we had a lot of mix people in that school, lot of Caribbeans folks too, maybe that had something to do with it.

 

[wet landscapes]

ed.

You can't stop me nowhere. I'm just going off what you said so if anything you should stop yourself from implying that about yourself. How can I let you know on some stats when I just said the only way the stuff you was kicking had merit was if there were studies? If I had the studies that proved that I would show it but I didn't say there were studies about that. I know your opinion is based off personal experience but like most people I think you have a very limited experience on this stuff. That's all people use a relative or two and that's their sample size. Hell I walk out the door and the shyt most of y'all kick regarding this is thrown in the bushes regarding this topic. That's why its hard for me to agree with views like your from my perspective.

I never said anything about myself or my skin color, nor implied anything
I am not personally affected by what men want
I do observe, however, that when it comes to the most attractive black women (according to black men), light skinned women are the standard and dark skinned women are niche
it's obvious
dudes just aren't that excited about dark skin unless they have a special preference for it
I'm not saying they hate dark skin, I'm saying that light skin gets treated like it's special
why are jokes about lighter skinned women getting flooded with messages on social media funny?
no one laughs at shyt that doesn't happen
we are bombarded with images of light skin in a positive light 24/7 so I don't know why it's so hard to acknowledge that people actually do see them in a positive light

 

[thewiz]

Man I just being real I've never saw nobody act crazy about no white girl ever. Like I said dudes would say they'll fukk one or date em if they look good but no extra stuff they wouldn't say about any other girl. Also for me its just hard to put stock in shyt that's so different from what you see on daily basis living and online stuff that's usually waaaaay different from actual things you see.

I'm right there with you I don't be seein this shyt at all, thats why I asked them if they've had this problem individually so I could get some sort of insight

 

[Kitsch]

My younger brother and I were speaking about girls yesterday and he's definitely on that .

Had to have word with one of my close friends about being on that too.

 

[MoonGoddess]

I can't tell them what they see I agree with that. I don't think I tell them they don't see it but that their experience is usually limited. Mine isn't superior but hell I at least pay attention to things where I'm at and this stuff isn't even visible anywhere in this country I've been in any significant number. That's just what I believe and if I'm wrong fukk it I'll take that L. I can agree with the second part though.

Limited or not we can only speak what we see, just cause your view point is wider doesn't make theirs invalid.
The thing is i can see what you are saying and say yeah okay that's what philmonore went through, but i notice that just because something doesn't happen to some of you or yall aint been through it
then it's like what others are saying about their experience is disregarded. Im not saying that what you see is isnt true, but you can't tell me im just sitting here making stuff cause i have nothing better to do either.

 

[Already]

Why is it a problem if some guys are color struck cave hoes or light hoes? Are black women the only group allowed to have a preference? Yeah, dark dudes don't really like their counter-parts, but neither do light hoes. Seems like some of yall (not just here, but other dark girls on the internet) be trying to convince these dudes to like yall. Why would you want someone needs to be convinced to like you? Just date another shade or race if it's that hard to get a man.

 

[philmonroe]

I never said anything about myself or my skin color, nor implied anything
I am not personally affected by what men want
I do observe, however, that when it comes to the most attractive black women (according to black men), light skinned women are the standard and dark skinned women are niche
it's obvious
dudes just aren't that excited about dark skin unless they have a special preference for it
I'm not saying they hate dark skin, I'm saying that light skin gets treated like it's special
why are jokes about lighter skinned women getting flooded with messages on social media funny?
no one laughs at shyt that doesn't happen
we are bombarded with images of light skin in a positive light 24/7 so I don't know why it's so hard to acknowledge that people actually do see them in a positive light

I mean I guess but I think your online too much as evidenced by social media jokes. I'm going to be honest I can't answer that so I I'll trust you right on that. Y'all also give dudes too much credit if you look good you look good period not no she dark get her out of here. That's the stuff that sounds like bullshyt from people that maybe unattractive looking for the cop out. I can acknowledge people like light skin chicks but they like darkskin chicks too. That's my problem its like some online dark skin girls try to push some bogus narrative that don't fly IRL. That shyt might fly on "social media" but IRL she look good dudes in there wifing them and all. Most dudes don't vet chicks at all and wife whoever they fukking just because she fukking him. Knowing that I'm supposed to think huge number of black dudes pushing good looking dark skin jawns to the side waiting like a chick who won't settle for a light skin chick? I see people of both genders say shyt about the other that has me like wtf.

Limited or not we can only speak what we see, just cause your view point is wider doesn't make theirs invalid.
The thing is i can see what you are saying and say yeah okay that's what philmonore went through, but i notice that just because something doesn't happen to some of you or yall aint been through it
then it's like what others are saying about their experience is disregarded. Im not saying that what you see is isnt true, but you can't tell me im just sitting here making stuff cause i have nothing better to do either.

Its not about being invalid its about usually having a more realistic view based on bigger sample size that's all. The smaller the sample size the more chance for outlier stuff to happen. I never their stuff was disregarded and even said so in the last post to you. I said I put more stock in mine because of broader experience. If you take that as disregard ill roll with it. The one thing I really wish you would stop doing is saying that I said you or anybody made stuff up. None of us have to agree with each other doesn't mean the other person is making it up and I'm almost certain I never said anybody made anything up. If I did I apologize cause that's not what I was getting at.

 

[MoonGoddess]

I mean I guess but I think your online too much as evidenced by social media jokes. I'm going to be honest I can't answer that so I I'll trust you right on that. Y'all also give dudes too much credit if you look good you look good period not no she dark get her out of here. That's the stuff that sounds like bullshyt from people that maybe unattractive looking for the cop out. I can acknowledge people like light skin chicks but they like darkskin chicks too. That's my problem its like some online dark skin girls try to push some bogus narrative that don't fly IRL. That shyt might fly on "social media" but IRL she look good dudes in there wifing them and all. Most dudes don't vet chicks at all and wife whoever they fukking just because she fukking him. Knowing that I'm supposed to think huge number of black dudes pushing good looking dark skin jawns to the side waiting like a chick who won't settle for a light skin chick? I see people of both genders say shyt about the other that has me like wtf.

Its not about being invalid its about usually having a more realistic view based on bigger sample size that's all. The smaller the sample size the more chance for outlier stuff to happen. I never their stuff was disregarded and even said so in the last post to you. I said I put more stock in mine because of broader experience. If you take that as disregard ill roll with it. The one thing I really wish you would stop doing is saying that I said you or anybody made stuff up. None of us have to agree with each other doesn't mean the other person is making it up and I'm almost certain I never said anybody made anything up. If I did I apologize cause that's not what I was getting at.

Oh no i didnt mean you personally. I meant in general. I've seen some guys on here infer that. They think that just because men want to have sex with us that means what we are saying isnt true.
It's like they dont realize that we're talking about relationships and they are talking about sex. You have nothing to apologize for, i just misspoke that's all.

 

[Elle Driver]

I mean it's possible but I feel you.. only time I really saw nikkas goin crazy bout white girls was in high school but even then they grew out of it.. that shyt is mostly online if you ask me and it's a small percentage of nikkas usually just tryin to get attention

Black men don't go after them like that. But light skin women, definitely.

 

[Blackout]

I am not bsing its true. I want to find articles and there are just muvh out there d compared to the reverse.

There need to be some because my cousin who is light skin sees first hand that this preference for light skin affects women as well.

 

[wet landscapes]

Why is it a problem if some guys are color struck cave hoes or light hoes? Are black women the only group allowed to have a preference? Yeah, dark dudes don't really like their counter-parts, but neither do light hoes. Seems like some of yall (not just here, but other dark girls on the internet) be trying to convince these dudes to like yall. Why would you want someone needs to be convinced to like you? Just date another shade or race if it's that hard to get a man.

there is a value that is placed on pale skin in society in general
expecting people not to care is pointless
they will and do

I mean I guess but I think your online too much as evidenced by social media jokes. I'm going to be honest I can't answer that so I I'll trust you right on that. Y'all also give dudes too much credit if you look good you look good period not no she dark get her out of here. That's the stuff that sounds like bullshyt from people that maybe unattractive looking for the cop out. I can acknowledge people like light skin chicks but they like darkskin chicks too. That's my problem its like some online dark skin girls try to push some bogus narrative that don't fly IRL. That shyt might fly on "social media" but IRL she look good dudes in there wifing them and all. Most dudes don't vet chicks at all and wife whoever they fukking just because she fukking him. Knowing that I'm supposed to think huge number of black dudes pushing good looking dark skin jawns to the side waiting like a chick who won't settle for a light skin chick? I see people of both genders say shyt about the other that has me like wtf.

Its not about being invalid its about usually having a more realistic view based on bigger sample size that's all. The smaller the sample size the more chance for outlier stuff to happen. I never their stuff was disregarded and even said so in the last post to you. I said I put more stock in mine because of broader experience. If you take that as disregard ill roll with it. The one thing I really wish you would stop doing is saying that I said you or anybody made stuff up. None of us have to agree with each other doesn't mean the other person is making it up and I'm almost certain I never said anybody made anything up. If I did I apologize cause that's not what I was getting at.

everyone is online, we're in a social media generation
if all my adult male family members (who are all chocolate to dark skinned) from my grandpa to my cousins cuff light skinned women and my friends were on that , what am I supposed to infer about mens preferences for skin color and women? Am I supposed to ignore that?
Like I said. Colorism affects the media, the workplace, school environments, etc. So why do you think it's impossible for it to affect sex?