My name is Susan Pace Hoy and I am the granddaughter of Harry Herbert Pace. I grew up in an all white neighborhood in a small town, went to an all white school during elementary and high school, attended an all white Episcopalian church on Sundays and grew up with the understanding that my roots were possibly Italian. I never was told anything about my father’s heritage and he never offered any information to us.
About two years ago, my brother told me of my real roots. His wife discovered from the internet, a story of a man- an incredible man. This was the story of a scholar, lawyer, author, entrepreneur, philosopher, insurance executive & record producer. This was a story of a man who founded the largest black insurance company in America, who partnered with W.C. Handy, “Father of the Blues”, founded Black Swan records and produced the first black recording artists in America. This man was an advocate for the black race for nearly his lifetime until he passed into the white world. The article I read off the internet that evening was by Jitu K. Weusi. “The Rise and Fall of Black Swan Records.”
It was written how this man was very light-skinned and could pass for white. That is exactly what he did-years after the fall of Black Swan Records. I was stunned that the man I was reading about was in fact my grandfather. I was the granddaughter of this incredible person. How could this have been kept from us? How could my father go to his death without telling us this unbelievable story? How could he have been married to my mother for so many years and never told her? I always struggled with why my father never could tell us anything about his childhood. He never talked of his Dad unless we questioned him and then I suppose it was all false. My father had only one sibling, a sister, and she is alive and living in the mid-west. “The Secret” that my aunt and my father harbored almost their entire life is now out to the family.
My nephew asks the question how a discovery such as this could make a person question their sense of identity?
Perhaps when you are young and still have so much of life to live and are only just formulating your identity it may not pose as such an issue. Young people today have been around a multitude of cultures for most of their lives. Growing up in the 50’s, 60’s & 70’s, I remember the civil rights movement, and when busing was being used as a way of integration of the schools. When you have lived 50 + years as one race and then suddenly find you’re bi-racial, it has been not an easy adjustment. These past two years have been tough. Our family has been ripped apart. Some are not speaking to one another and some are. Some do not want to delve deeper into this while my brother and I clearly want to know it all. I have shared the story with my very closest friends. They have embraced me and given me their ear while others I have not, just because of the magnitude of the story. At times I feel conflicted. I am so proud to be related to this man. On the other hand, I feel ashamed of myself for the hesitation when asked about my heritage. Now I am constantly questioning myself. Could it be that I am perpetuating racism by these feelings? I am who I have always been- I am the same person, just a lot more enriched. Aren’t we all just a melting pot of cultures? Perhaps this stereotype of what equates whiteness or blackness will someday disappear. I would like to think that as time goes on race can be a thing of the past.
