*Spin off*COLI LADIES: Your opinion on dudes who don't respond to CLEAR signals you are giving

[CinnaSlim]

Before you simply said y'all talked about a 3some. Now you offered it. Big difference.

Until you get a feel for eachother, the most alpha dude needs to know what he's workin' with, unless he's only concerned with himself. Expressin' yourself is not takin' the lead. It's sharin' vital info.

I probably suck at explaining things. So let me try again...

I already said. Me and dude been talking/chilling/dating for months. We already had a feel for eachother, which is why we were having those type of conversations in the first place.

This aint my first rodeo lol. I know what I want, I know how to let a dude know. I know how to initiate sex or physical contact. My point is that if I already know you like me (we are already past that stage) and I'm throwing you the box with your name on it, and you don't try to get it, then *I* no longer want you. That's not alpha. That's not sexy. I'm not trying to take the lead, I want a guy who goes after what he wants.

It's not a thing of what I need to do or what I'm doing wrong. I'm a ho, I know how to seduce men. So tho I appreciate the advice, if it ever gets to that point, I already know to cut the man loose because he's not what I'm looking for.

 

[BezO]

...I was raised women don't go after men, and I have seen some bad things come from it too so...

Bad things can come from whatever method of initiation. Because of the so called rules of society, many more bad things have come from women's passive methods than active methods.

I'm not knockin' the "women don't go after men" method. I get that many women still want men to approach. But not exertin' any control over what type of men come after you seems like a dice roll. Eye contact is probably the simplest invite.

But I believe you can initiate contact without appearin' to holla. Engagin' someone a certain way, under certain circumstances can get the job done.

But it sounds like you don't care either way.

 

[jeh]

 

[BezO]

...and I'm throwing you the box with your name on it, and you don't try to get it...

This is the confusin' part. Maybe if you explain your method & his reaction. Because it sounds like you're tryin' to give someone somethin' they don't want. You don't have to be alpha to ACCEPT p*ssy.

 

[Raava]

Bad things can come from whatever method of initiation. Because of the so called rules of society, many more bad things have come from women's passive methods than active methods.

I'm not knockin' the "women don't go after men" method. I get that many women still want men to approach. But not exertin' any control over what type of men come after you seems like a dice roll. Eye contact is probably the simplest invite.

But I believe you can initiate contact without appearin' to holla. Engagin' someone a certain way, under certain circumstances can get the job done.

But it sounds like you don't care either way.

Yea I get what you are saying, and I do agree. But yea the latter is true. I do feel someone actively looking for someone should take more control over who approaches them. You also can't control who approaches you. I think its a dice roll either way, but a woman can try to get who she wants.

 

[iBrowse]

@old_timer made a good point.

At the risk of sounding pedantic, I think we're trying to confusing a man making the first move via a cold approach (no-signal @Raedawn07 style) vs. a woman giving signs that he should approach her. I'll approach all day if I see an attractive girl giving me subtle signs, but if she's not doing anything to get my attention and is only thinking to herself that she wants me...tough shyt, I can't read your mind

 

[Raava]

@old_timer made a good point.

At the risk of sounding pedantic, I think we're trying to confusing a man making the first move via a cold approach (no-signal @Raedawn07 style) vs. a woman giving signs that he should approach her. I'll approach all day if I see an attractive girl giving me subtle signs, but if she's not doing anything to get my attention and is only thinking to herself that she wants me...tough shyt, I can't read your mind

 

[jeh]

"I FUKKED ALL THEM BYTCHES DMX WAS NAMING" Too $hort

 

[FLYINHAWAIIAN]

i remember my 3rd or 4th girlfriend
her mother had bought her a sex ed book the same day she got her first bra
it was a package deal, so to speak
homegirl had really soaked up that knowledge
she flat out insisted i wear condoms
which kind of bummed me out, tbh
and then the practicalities- how would i buy these condoms??
what if the store won't let me?? or people who know my family see me in line??
i was tempted to make her buy them
then i thought...
holdup- she's already taking more risks, etc (she was a virgin)
am i really too shook to walk into rite-aid and buy condoms??
i wasn't scared-scared- just reticent
a chore i would prefer not to do,, but i did it!
though i did walk into a different neighborhood where no one would know me



then at 18 i dated this world-weary kind of bytchy white girl
but she was a good and doing everything i asked
eventually i wanted to do something so crazy i was honestly scared to say it out loud
because it would sound...real crazy
like.. real crazy ( role play scenario)
so i was kind of stumbling through my words
hoping she'd read my mind so i wouldn't hafta be explicit
and she just hit me with the scust face
"how can you expect me to do [that] if you aren't even man enough to say it??"
and... you know?? she was 100% right
that was actually a good lesson for me
if i wanted her to do xyz, how could i be afraid of saying it??
so my testicles fully descended that day
and i learned to speak my mind with women

now let me stop all this bullshyt typing and get to the point
how can you be worried about approaching a woman??
if just making a move is considered a big hurdle
how are you ever gonna find the nerve to tell her what to do in bed??
how will you confront all the tough conversations that happen in a relationship??
it doesn't get any easier as you go

I used to hint at a chick to gimme head.
seems like if you're too explicit, the female will be on some and say no cuz she'll feel like a hoe. Or they used to be on that "eeww I don't do that".

asking them to suck your dikk is almost as bad as asking them to fukk.
in their head, if they say yes, they'll seem to easy and feel hoeish, so they say no.

 

[FLYINHAWAIIAN]

I probably suck at explaining things. So let me try again...

I already said. Me and dude been talking/chilling/dating for months. We already had a feel for eachother, which is why we were having those type of conversations in the first place.

This aint my first rodeo lol. I know what I want, I know how to let a dude know. I know how to initiate sex or physical contact. My point is that if I already know you like me (we are already past that stage) and I'm throwing you the box with your name on it, and you don't try to get it, then *I* no longer want you. That's not alpha. That's not sexy. I'm not trying to take the lead, I want a guy who goes after what he wants.

It's not a thing of what I need to do or what I'm doing wrong. I'm a ho, I know how to seduce men. So tho I appreciate the advice, if it ever gets to that point, I already know to cut the man loose because he's not what I'm looking for.

how do you know you was giving him the right signs to get the box?
these signs are simple to you women, and unnoticed to men.

you can't be at the store and say OOO ITS HOT. I CANT WAIT TO TAKE ME A SHOWER. and when he doesn't catch on you like OMG I WAS CLEARLY TELLING HIM I WANTED SEX IN THE SHOWER. DID HE NOT NOTICE WE WERE STANDING BY THE HOT DOGS FOR A REASON. THEN I PUT SOME CAT FOOD IN THE BASKET. UHHHH STUPID THAT MEANS I WANT YOUR HOT DOG IN THIS CAT. UGHH MENZ SO DUMB

 

[CinnaSlim]

This is the confusin' part. Maybe if you explain your method & his reaction. Because it sounds like you're tryin' to give someone somethin' they don't want. You don't have to be alpha to ACCEPT p*ssy.

"My method"? It's not that scientific lol.
We talked, we hugged, I told him I liked him. He told me he likes me too. He would say stuff like,
He hasn't had sex in this car yet. He invited me to stay with him in Miami. So I guess those were his signals. But at the end of the day, someone has to make the first move and I've already been in that situation with another Pisces before. I'm not really gonna go into anymore detail.

I guess we have a different opinion of what alpha is. Alpha to me has masculine traits. More Yang than yin. Active, as opposed to passive. Assertive, as opposed to receptive.

Also, I'm not giving anyone anything hence why I left him alone. Two passive people aren't gonna do much.

 

[How Sway?]

Why?

bytchass cac, I was being polite. FOH

you feisty

I love that in a woman

 

[CinnaSlim]

how do you know you was giving him the right signs to get the box?
these signs are simple to you women, and unnoticed to men.

you can't be at the store and say OOO ITS HOT. I CANT WAIT TO TAKE ME A SHOWER. and when he doesn't catch on you like OMG I WAS CLEARLY TELLING HIM I WANTED SEX IN THE SHOWER. DID HE NOT NOTICE WE WERE STANDING BY THE HOT DOGS FOR A REASON. THEN I PUT SOME CAT FOOD IN THE BASKET. UHHHH STUPID THAT MEANS I WANT YOUR HOT DOG IN THIS CAT. UGHH MENZ SO DUMB

Thottish stuff. Like sending pics. Telling him I would have sex with him. Asking to come over.

I was trying to get the D.

 

[Sierra Mist]

I've missed out on so many signs. Sometimes girls are being difficult with it but other times its just me.

This one girl (fine as hell) knew I was messing with her friend. She came up to me and said. "I heard about you." I said "what"? She said "I heard you can eat that p*ssy." I said what again. She said "Real men eat p*ssy" and she made the two finger gesture at her lips.

All my bytch ass did was say "I don't know what you talking about" and walked away.


Another time as I was walking by this one girl from the side said "Hello, I'm 18 got my own car got my own everything......" and all I did was smile and keep walking

Thottish stuff. Like sending pics. Telling him I would have sex with him. Asking to come over.

I was trying to get the D.

Jesus. That dude was 100% bytch made.

 

[BezO]

Thottish stuff. Like sending pics. Telling him I would have sex with him. Asking to come over.

I was trying to get the D.

Ahh, this is what I was askin'.

But again, it sounds like he didn't want it. You don't have to be alpha to accept p*ssy thrown at you. What you did is beyond givin' signals.