Somebody offers you $200 million to fight and beat a moose in a cage match

[GreenGhxst]

I could honestly do it with a just spear. Our ancestors were smaller than us and hunting mamoths and sht so this is nothing. Hell, there are tribesmen In the african savanah that can put down male lions today.


You dont need fancy tools or crazy speed if you have longer reach than the animal. That knife is too short. You need one of those spartan long spears. Its made even easier if the only attack move the animal has is "charge". Just use the cage behind you as support and use that animal's own momentum to stab it in the head/neck as its pushing forward. Might break your rib on impact, but the moose would kill itself.



I think a bear is more difficult because it has more moves than "charge forward blindly".

yeah, but it was like an 8 to 1 ratio

it wasn't one nikka per mammoth ratio

 

[BucciMane]

Classic thread that's got my ribs hurting for real

Let me just say this: Here's a moose gliding through 5-6 feet of densely packed snow EFFORTLESSLY

Nikkas in here talking about climbing cages and waiting for the right moment to strike

That sucker would be on you before you could even blink once from 50 yards away. And then I hope your family loves spaghetti because you're getting turned into pasta sauce before you can even regret your decision.

That's male or female

That's with or without antlers

And we're not even gonna talk about how bulls can be 7 feet tall (at the shoulder, mind you) and weigh up to 1600 lbs AND also has the athleticism of a deer.

Have you ever seen the size of a moose's head alone? It looks like something out of Jurassic Park

Even an elk you'd stand no chance of defeating. Those things are gigantic as well!

These things turn cars into crushed cans in no time. Imagine how fast it'd bust up human flesh?

People that have never seen a moose seem to think it looks like a dairy cow. .


Moose are enormous and fast as hell. Just watching that gif of the moose running through that snow is insane. There are plow trucks that won't cut through snow like that..

 

[Orbital-Fetus]

A flashlight?

 

[blues_funk_reggae]

Hold up, is there a ring involved in this? And is the Canada moose inside the ring while I'm outside?

I'm trying to pull some McGuiver shīt

 

[RhodyRum]

People that have never seen a moose seem to think it looks like a dairy cow. .


Moose are enormous and fast as hell. Just watching that gif of the moose running through that snow is insane. There are plow trucks that won't cut through snow like that..

Exactly to your entire post.

Mofos don't understand these things are runaway trains, no hyperbole whasoever.

I think also people who know they're a species of deer get to thinking they're docile like a white-tail. And even a white-tail can body you like nothing.

People don't really understand how easily angered moose get. Forget harassing it, forget touching it. All it's gotta see is you encroaching on its territory longer than it can tolerate and it will flip out and go ballistic on you.

That's the funniest part of the misunderstanding of this creature. The size, speed, and power is bad enough to deal with, but this thing has a hair trigger and an attitude problem to match.

 

[Buddy]

A flashlight?

ya'll don't know how to use it

look: just put the beam on it the moment it starts to charge. it'll veer off and slow it's pace in confusion. THAT is when you strike. Keep the beam on it's face and move in for the tendons to immobilize it... AMATEURS

 

[2 Up 2 Down]

shyt is mad easy walk up to that mf like a friend then stab an eye out then he cant see where I'm at then it's repeated stabs whenever I feel like it op is a dumbass thinking this was gonna be hard

Moose don't fukk with humans.

 

[CouldntBeMeTho]

ya'll don't know how to use it

look: just put the beam on it the moment it starts to charge. it'll veer off and slow it's pace in confusion. THAT is when you strike. Keep the beam on it's face and move in for the tendons to immobilize it... AMATEURS

Breh you really trying to get us killed

 

[Premeditated]

this might be the easiest $200 mill i can get

 

[Mowgli]

How'd i know this fake ass bruce lee would have something to say. You'd be bouncin around the room like the putty patrol on power rangers waiting on getting trampled

Civilians . Never believe in themselves. Wow man. Who knew a man who posts people's pics on the Internet would be a weak coward.

Big shocker.

 

[Animal House]

I remember I was telling my coworkers here in Louisiana how big a moose is because I’ve seen one up close back east they didn’t believe me until they threw a video up on YouTube


Yo those fukkers are huge

 

[Amestafuu (Emeritus)]

We'd be having the first curry moose meal known to man with plantains on the side. White rice and gravy

 

[FromStLouis]

Billionaire Coli fukkery would be insane. I hope one of you brehs make it rich.



















I'd love to win an easy $200M.

 

[staticshock]

Blind him

Side step

Slash his rib cage

Be cautious of a wild kick

Blind him again

Commando roll to your right (his left)

While he has his head near his open womb, violently percuss his throat

Blind one last time

Stay clear of his thrusting antlers and legs as he is going through exsanguination

Collect reward and take my ol lady to the Maldives

 

[staticshock]

How'd i know this fake ass bruce lee would have something to say. You'd be bouncin around the room like the putty patrol on power rangers waiting on getting trampled