So whats the downside of living life on easy mode? (No kids/ no small kids)

[AnonymityX1000]

So it's not just a western thing. In Asian cultures, they try to pressure and gaslight childless people into having kids with mfers they don't even find attractive. Then these same mfers try to come off as the self-righteous ones. FOH That's why when they try me. I always push back. You can't play nice with narcissistic and the needy empty parent types.

https://www.thecoli.com/threads/in-china-if-youre-a-single-woman-over-30-they-call-you-orange-at-the-bottom-of-the-basket.966930/

Ya'll know there's other people that can be close to you besides your kids. Most kids don't even like hanging around their parents like that. If you develop a life outside of just raising a child that didn't even asks to be here in the first place then guilting them into changing your depends on diapers and watching you die slowly. WHy put someone through that bruh?

If you are a good parent who raised your kids to the best of your ability most of your children would observe that, appreciate it and WANT to help you in your older age. That's nice and more satisfying than paying someone to do it. There's a nice personal touch included.
No need for the negative spin it's not about 'guilting' anybody or 'most kids probably won't want to hang out with you' <- BTW is that an official stat or did you just make that up? > 50% of adult children don't like hanging with their parents? That's news to me.

 

[King Poetic]

Everyone situation is different

When u get older and health fade, having someone rather your partner or kids if u have some could help or they can forget about u

Over the past 5 years I gave up a lot from friends to traveling because my dad had lung cancer, so I was the one leaving work early to take him to appointments and getting food and drinks for him and talking to the doctors, because my mom don’t know and she’s older as well…

What hit me , is when my dad said no one cares, talking about other family members and friends because he had no problem giving them a few dollars here and there, but he wasn’t even getting a call let alone a visit . Only from his brother..

After my dad past over a year and half ago, I had to sacrifice again by from working from the office to working from my mom house handling her bills, sitting up ring so I can watch her move around if I’m not around and etc…

My sister isn’t shyt, because she haven’t done shyt to help out

So like I said every Situation is different

 

[hex]

If you are a good parent who raised your kids to the best of your ability most of your children would observe that, appreciate it and WANT to help you in your older age.

That's not necessarily true, and I'm not understanding what this is based on other than hope.

The fact of the matter is you could have children, raise them as well as you possibly can, and they can still ship your ass off to a retirement home.

I've seen it first hand.

Fred.

 

[ba'al]

If you are a good parent who raised your kids to the best of your ability most of your children would observe that, appreciate it and WANT to help you in your older age. That's nice and more satisfying than paying someone to do it. There's a nice personal touch included.

This is an idealized view imo. Some kids might want to help their parents when they're older but some might not. Also your kids might have something occur in their life that cause them to be disabled and you might have to end up being their life time caregiver. Or they might want to help you but are too preoccupied with their own families because your wanted them to get married and have their own kids right?

Your point of view IMO is idealistic and doesn't account for all of the nautral events that can transpire in a person life to prevent them from being your maid and servant when you're older.


Also, you can do everything right as a parent and your child can still turnout to be a "rotten apple" or in other words spoiled.

This an example. He was given everything he wanted.

 

[King Poetic]

That's not necessarily true, and I'm not understanding what this is based on other than hope.

The fact of the matter is you could have children, raise them as well as you possibly can, and they can still ship your ass off to a retirement home.

I've seen it first hand.

Fred.

Your right as well

Everything is a roll of dice

 

[MischievousMonkey]

There is no objective downside or upside to being childfree as it is a personal choice

Both sides of the aisle are throwing around pretty dumb arguments about it though Between the people trying to bioengineer caretakers and the people pretending that their personal inaptitude to deal with life's struggles means it is just suffering, this is a shyt show

 

[AnonymityX1000]

That's not necessarily true, and I'm not understanding what this is based on other than hope.

The fact of the matter is you could have children, raise them as well as you possibly can, and they can still ship your ass off to a retirement home.

I've seen it first hand.

Fred.

Yes you are right not necessarily. But even then they put you in a retirement home and will likely visit, give you opportunity to go other places periodically and provide you with positive news about your family growing. It's an anomaly, kids having nothing to so with parents who treated them well.

 

[Dave24]

i’m just speaking as someone who once was a teenage girl in a big family and seen creepy older dudes hanging on the periphery every once in a while

men who have made the lifestyle choice to be childless bachelors do not be around after a certain age. i only saw my dad’s best friend extremely rarely, he was not bringing that nikka around like that except on once in a lifetime occasions like my brother’s wedding. now he’s pushing 70 and regretting never settling down, but that’s a different story

ya’ll might want it one way but reality hits all of us as we age

@dr. pill biden what about men who have a hard time attracting a partner/spouse and want to be in a relationship? They don't want to be a childless bachelor necessarily.

 

[Dave24]

@MMS what do you think on the topic? You have children, correct?

 

[ba'al]

@dr. pill biden what about men who have a hard time attracting a partner/spouse and want to be in a relationship? They don't want to be a childless bachelor necessarily.

If you're ugly they'll feel sorry for you a little bit cuz in their mind you're too ugly to even get a woman.

 

[AnonymityX1000]

This is an idealized view imo. Some kids might want to help their parents when they're older but some might not. Also your kids might have something occur in their life that cause them to be disabled and you might have to end up being their life time caregiver. Or they might want to help you but are too preoccupied with their own families because your wanted them to get married and have their own kids right?

Your point of view IMO is idealistic and doesn't account for all of the nautral events that can transpire in a person life to prevent them from being your maid and servant when you're older.


Also, you can do everything right as a parent and your child can still turnout to be a "rotten apple" or in other words spoiled.

This an example. He was given everything he wanted.

And in turn you are too pessimistic. Worried about the world being cruel, the rare chance of disease, a random accident making them incapacitated, being too preoccupied in their life to forget about their parents, etc. Every scenario has to go wrong for it not to be worthwhile to you it seems.

 

[hex]

This is an idealized view imo. Some kids might want to help their parents when they're older but some might not. Also your kids might have something occur in their life that cause them to be disabled and you might have to end up being their life time caregiver. Or they might want to help you but are too preoccupied with their own families because your wanted them to get married and have their own kids right?

Your point of view IMO is idealistic and doesn't account for all of the nautral events that can transpire in a person life to prevent them from being your maid and servant when you're older.


Also, you can do everything right as a parent and your child can still turnout to be a "rotten apple" or in other words spoiled.

This an example. He was given everything he wanted.

I was out on my own when I was 17, a high school friend talked his mom and dad into letting me stay in their basement.

They had two "children" (a son and daughter, in their 30's) living with them. No jobs. No motivation. Leeched off them until the day the parents died.

Meanwhile, the guy I went to high school with turned out fine. Dude moved out at 20.

I got out of there as soon as I graduated high school.

Yes you are right not necessarily. But even then they put you in a retirement home and will likely visit, give you opportunity to go other places periodically and provide you with positive news about your family growing. It's an anomaly, kids having nothing to so with parents who treated them well.

Breh again....what is this "likely" based on?

I've personally seen parents give their kids the world and get completely ignored later in life. I've also seen what you're saying, where the kids were loving and attentive.

I've seen the former more often than the later. Not saying that is the objective reality, but the reasons you all are giving for having kids are frankly not good. Respectfully.

Your right as well

Everything is a roll of dice

That's my point.

I'm not telling other people to not have kids.

Other people are arguing everyone should have kids based on things which aren't objectively true.

Fred.

 

[3rdWorld]

Need at least one kid out of wedlock.

 

[ba'al]

And in turn you are too pessimistic.

Not really I think I'm balanced it's just that ya'll parrot idealized and romanticized highly dogmatic viewpoints and to counter that you force childfree people to mention the negative aspects of childrearing since ya'll won't do yourselves which is disingenuous.

So ya'll get to paint yourselves as the selfrighteous care givers and childfree people are just these lonely monsters. FOH.

 

[King Poetic]

One thing I would say

Being poor and having all kind of Medicare and Medicaid you are more likely to get first come and first serve at health care home services

Since my dad had good insurance for having a good job, insurance wouldn’t really cover shyt and u would have to come out of pocket like $1,100 a week in order to get placed in a nursery home..

It’s like u work all these years and in your final years your insurance won’t cover shyt..