On the real, why don't we just stop paying for females in general

[™BlackPearl The Empress™]

@Juicy @wickedsm @TheStripper
So the first date to a woman is finding out if he is broke/cheap?
A first date to a man is finding out if she's a gold digger?
While both are finding out if they have things in common

Look at it how you'd like playboy. You don't know what a golddigger is if you think expecting someone to pay for a date they asked for is golddigging. And not wanting to pay for a date doesn't necessarily mean you're broke. But it does probably in one way or another mean that you shouldn't be dating; whether you can't afford it or whether you just have an overall negative attitude towards women.

 

[LadySimone]

If a man invited me out on a date and expected me to pay my part, I wouldn't think he was broke or cheap. I would believe he wasn't that into me or didn't feel I was worth a proper date. Because, best believe, if a woman he REALLY wanted came along, this discussion wouldn't even be had. She wouldn't be expected to come out of pocket for anything.

Thankfully, I only read about this BS on forums. This isn't something I come across in my reality. I also don't date for free meals, as I can afford my own groceries.

Where did this idea come that women date just up eat? Probably from some ironic white female journalist trying to be funny

You know how much time and effort it takes to get ready for a date? Shyt I might as well go on just eat if I'm hungry.

 

[™BlackPearl The Empress™]

Hypothetically speaking because I am married, but if we are committed then I have no issue with doing free stuff. But if it's the first step before agreeing to enter a courtship, then I am not coming to your house to chill. If I am not worth $30 then obviously you aren't that interested and therefore you aren't worth my time. If you ask me to pay on the first few outings, then you aren't my type and I am not interested.

I'm glad I don't have to deal with these issues.

It's not an issue. Never in my life have I had to pay for a first date or date in grneral. They are just selling tickets.

 

[wickedsm]

Well that's where we clash. Seems like it has its benefits but I don't know if I could have a stay at home wife. I'd feel as if I was the one keeping her alive, like she was a dependent and not my equal but we're in 2 different places in our lives and if it makes you 2 happy

It's definitely not for everyone.
Also I've always worked full time plus for all but 2 years, prior to about the last 2 years. Plus we've been married a million years.
I have also had to completely hold our household down for from 6 months to 2 years without him at home.
So yes you and i are at completely different points in our lives.
We were always very traditional though. From day 1.

I think everyone should do what's best for themselves and their partner.

The only time I get irked is clowns who want/expect/demand a traditional Susie homemaker type wife but don't want to
Live up to the role of Susie homemakers husband.

Kinda creepy that you say you would feel you were keeping her alive though ....

 

[VFib]

Where did this idea come that women date just up eat? Probably from some ironic white female journalist trying to be funny

You know how much time and effort it takes to get ready for a date? Shyt I might as well go on just eat if I'm hungry.

It came from men who continuously get rejected and instead of looking in the mirror, form a hatred for women.

And dinner dates are overrated. Put some thought into your dates. I rarely eat out and when I do, it's enjoying the company of friends or by myself after running some errands.

Let's try some thing new together, not just sit and eat. We eat food everyday, this isn't new.

 

[™BlackPearl The Empress™]

this ain't your real viewpoint though cause let every dude you know decide to not pay and you'd be the main complaining about how there's no real men out here anymore rather than just friend zoning all of em, cause we all know y'all don't ask shyt, we ask and you film us with hidden cameras in your titties talmbout some street harassment

i see why you in here with this jibber jabber though cause if dudes actually smartened up and did this your profession would be the first to get tossed in the bushes

I don't ask if I don't want to pay. You should adopt the same philosophy and stop whining . The world is how it is boo. Cry me a river.

 

[Queen]

Thats funny because I see it the other way. I want to spend time with you to see if we should try and build something. I dont want to spend $30 on a first date to find out if we have a connection. I dont want to have to spend anything to find out if we have a connection. To me the spending comes in the relationship. Gifts, dinner, basically treating her like my girlfriend.
Idk if we will even have a second date. You paying shows me that you're taking this srsly.

Its like signing a undrafted rookie to a 7 year deal. Idk what Im getting yet. ( I really didn't want to use a sports metaphor but theyre just so perfect).
You know you're a good woman and you should know your worth but I dont, we just met. If I approached you then I believe that you're worth way more than $30 but how will I know? You could be a bummy chick. Why would I put any amount of time, money, energy into a bummy chick?

To be frank, this whole conversation seems bizarre to me. If a man asks a woman out then there was a reason for that. If that reason isn't strong enough to pay for the outing then

If a man is serious then he won't have an issue with paying for the date. If he doesn't want to pay then he must not be that interested in getting to know the woman.

Furthermore I don't believe in the American view of dating. I believe in courting with the purpose of finding a spouse. Therefore a man who has an issue with providing a meal or movie would automatically be disqualified due to his mindset.

 

[semtex]

I don't care really as long as she appreciates it and doesn't act like she's entitled to it. She better clean her damn plate too.

 

[Cynic]

Interesting... so a group men whose women for the past 60 years been raising children by themselves or with little help are now saying they ain't paying for shyt? Whose women had to go to white men for welfare jobs education infrastructure health care etc are NOW deciding they ain't paying for shyt?

@BMR

Nikka shut up.

If those women had stuck with black men and kept the nuclear family unit and let men the men build infrastructure, companies etc while they nurtured...we would be in a different position as a collective

They chose individual security over collective advancement....



Men paying is a chivalrous outdated concept which only existed due to the gender wage gap ....

One of the lasting remnants of this oppressive patrichial society and women are strong independent capable human beings responsible for their own sustinence


How can you support such misogynistic practices ?


You ok sis ?

*drops mic*


*ques up Rihanna BBHMM*

 

[LEEeveryday]

I just feel like if we want a woman to be a woman...we have to do our part and be men...

 

[PeridotPuss]

Seems like men who feel they are weak deep down, compensate by creating a false pedestal for themselves, so this " I don't spend money/invest in women" talk was born.

Yall most certainly do pay for things so .....most of this is all talk.

Further - I would prefer to pay for my own goods and meals as now you have zero leverage in our interactions as a man and we are TOTALLY on my program and terms money is power

 

[John Mayer]

Go ahead and do it and come back and report to us how many quality women give you a second date.

The woman can always find another man she can use for free food.

 

[audemarzz]

Seems like men who feel they are weak deep down, compensate by creating a false pedestal for themselves, so this " I don't spend money/invest in women" talk was born.

Yall most certainly do pay for things so .....most of this is all talk.

Further - I would prefer to pay for my own goods and meals as now you have zero leverage in our interactions as a man and we are TOTALLY on my program and terms money is power

I don't believe paying for things should give anyone leverage, I always believed if I give you something I gave it with no expectations or any thought of receiving some type of reward, plus all rewards aren't good I remember growing up the lady next door to my grandma wanted me to carry a bunch of stuff down to her basement, it was heavyyyyyy as hell but I did it. I'm getting ready to leave she say "hold up young man, can't let you do all that and not repay you" This heffa gives me 36 cent I walked up them steps slow as hell trying to figure out what a kid could possibly do with this odd assortment of change/monies, maybe had she given me 50 cent I could have figured something out but 36 cent. I would have been perfectly fine with just a thank you in that situation but oh well

 

[PeridotPuss]

I don't believe paying for things should give anyone leverage, I always believed if I give you something I gave it with no expectations or any thought of receiving some type of reward, plus all rewards aren't good I remember growing up the lady next door to my grandma wanted me to carry a bunch of stuff down to her basement, it was heavyyyyyy as hell but I did it. I'm getting ready to leave she say "hold up young, can't let you do all that and not repay you" This heffa gives me 36 cent I walked up them steps slow as hell trying to figure out what a kid could possibly do with this odd assortment of change/monies, maybe had she given me 50 cent I could have figured something out but 36 cent. I would have been perfectly fine with just a thank you in that situation but oh well

Not universally boo bear.

But in dating the rules are different a woman paying her own way in every way changes things

 

[audemarzz]

Not universally boo bear.

But in dating the rules are different a woman paying her own way in every way changes things

Haha power to ya @PeridotPuss I can't hate on something that saves me money

Sidenote: A women stopping me from paying . . . the thought is arousing . . .