Let's say...you're in a serious relationship and you meet another woman...

[biggaveli31]

That's not commitment, that's stupid (not to say you aren't committed). It's certain things you should be willing to do for your wife/husband ONLY and potentially jamming yourself up or supporting them financially is one of them. I think the reason people are so reluctant to get married is because they do the most while they are just dating and can't possibly fathom what else marriage has to offer.

What else does marriage have to offer?

 

[Azul]

So...

10 years of my life with her.
Financially supporting her while she was in law school.
Paying for her bar prep classes.
Letting her move into my house.
Treating her family like my family and vice-versa (I was the speaker at her father's funeral; she has 3 brothers btw).
Co-signing on loans for her to help improve her credit.

None of that is commitment?

BUT buying her a diamond and having a party, that's commitment?

So if its all that, are you just simply scared to get married?

 

[BlvdBrawler]

That's not commitment, that's stupid (not to say you aren't committed). It's certain things you should be willing to do for your wife/husband ONLY and potentially jamming yourself up or supporting them financially is one of them. I think the reason people are so reluctant to get married is because they do the most while they are just dating and can't possibly fathom what else marriage has to offer.

I would say that's exactly it. Signing paperwork and paying some fees to the government isn't going to enhance my relationship at all.

So if its all that, are you just simply scared to get married?

the typical "you're scared".

Neither of us want children, and we're both grown enough to know that we're constantly changing and evolving, and that someday we may no longer want to be together. It's kinda progressive, but it works for us.

 

[Azul]

Well, obviously marriage isn't for everyone but there are legal benefits to it. On top of that, if you guys have the mindset that "someday" you may not want to be together then well...

Do you

 

[jfkennedy]

Being with someone for THAT long as boyfriend/girlfriend is ridiculous.

20 years ago.

 

[CrimsonTider]

Life is short, go for it. You think your girl won't go backstage at a Trey Songz concert?

Some of us have no problem with this...

 

[BlvdBrawler]

Well, obviously marriage isn't for everyone but there are legal benefits to it. On top of that, if you guys have the mindset that "someday" you may not want to be together then well...

Do you

The opposite view is to be unrealistic and believe that it will always be roses and gravy. I prefer to be rooted in reality.

If we're right, then we can go our separate ways cleanly.

And if we're wrong, then we stay together forever.

Again, it's progressive, but it works.

 

[Rawtid]

What else does marriage have to offer?

I don't know, I've never been married.

But I do view boyfriends differently as husbands. Husbands should be a reflection of their wives and vice versa whereas a boyfriend may consider his girlfriend about things and that's it. I don't care what people do in their relationships, but I wouldn't be date someone long-term without the commitment of marriage. I feel it's a waste of time.

 

[Rawtid]

I would say that's exactly it. Signing paperwork and paying some fees to the government isn't going to enhance my relationship at all.




the typical "you're scared".

Neither of us want children, and we're both grown enough to know that we're constantly changing and evolving, and that someday we may no longer want to be together. It's kinda progressive, but it works for us.

So you're just dealing with each other until you get tired of each other?

 

[msims]

Did you hit???

Nope.



She kept suggesting that after school we got some "ice cream". It was her way of leaving campus together and spending some time. When suggested, it was always said in the most sexual way possible too.

I wasn't about that life, breh. I don't cheat...and if I did.....I wouldn't cheat with a crazy girl who knew my girl. ​

 

[Malta]

Statistically speaking, there's probably hundreds if not thousands of people you're really compatible with and could spend your life with. The key is to avoiding meeting them while you're with someone else

 

[Steve Piffler]

fall in with your girl all over again, breh. if she treats you like a king, don't put her in the peasant category. PLUS she has your seed too? she's gonna make your life a living hell if you dump her for another broad. she is gonna make dealing with her for your seed unbearable. but nurture what you have. don't shyt on her when she did nothing to deserve that treatment. you have your family all under 1 roof. you are ahead of the game, breh. don't fukk that up. i'm speaking from experience. trust me.....it's not worth it....

 

[BlvdBrawler]

So you're just dealing with each other until you get tired of each other?

Not sure if you're using the phrase "dealing with each other" as an attempted slight towards how you perceive my feelings towards her, but no. We're as happy now as we have ever been. 10 years of history (some of it rocky, but that's life) is a testament to that. The relationship is fun and beneficial for both of us, but if it changes or we change, then we can change with it or go our separate ways. I don't want to be that bitter old man who rode it out miserably for 30 years because of some contract. I love the girl, but marriage offers me nothing. You're looking at my lack of willingness to enter into that contract as a reflection of my feelings for her, and it's not that.

 

[Diondon]

Statistically speaking, there's probably hundreds if not thousands of people you're really compatible with and could spend your life with. The key is to avoiding meeting them while you're with someone else

I've always said this. The concept of one soul mate is laughable when there are billions of people on Earth.

 

[Steve Piffler]

The opposite view is to be unrealistic and believe that it will always be roses and gravy. I prefer to be rooted in reality.

If we're right, then we can go our separate ways cleanly.

And if we're wrong, then we stay together forever.

Again, it's progressive, but it works.

breh, you will NOT be going your separate ways cleanly. you are tied up financially with her. that's just as bad (and sometimes worse) as being married. what if something happens today and ya'll break up next week. you are stuck with her school bills. come on breh, you can't be serious....