You make some fine points.
But Peter is still in high school in ASM
Yeah but that Peter and Tobey's Peter are coming from two different places. It sucks when you lose a parent and have to wonder why they left and what happened to them etc. It puts you in a tough spot emotionally. I lost my mom a few years ago and while I wasn't orphaned or anything like that, it definitely felt like it and it put me in a bad spot emotionally for a while. Just having your parents snatched from you like that sucks and I figure the younger you are, the bigger that chip remains on your shoulders until you find some way to get over it and ASM is all about Peter getting over it or beginning to get over it while also coming to really appreciate what he has in his aunt and uncle but he didn't realize all of that until the anger and sadness and hurt got out of his system and those are all traits Peter possesses. Look at how he reacted to MJ after Gwen died, he was an a$$hole to her. Yeah he said some true things but that didn't make him less of a dikk. Peter in the comics didn't come from that place emotionally because he was content with his aunt and uncle and they didn't explore his parents until much later down the line when he was already a grown man