Winter is Coming

[rapbeats]

My dad said that was the first time he was caught. and she knew that because it's common sense, if you make something the most important thing on earth, you'll do anything and deal with anything to keep it.



You're not trying to help me, you're trying to get me to accept a man treating me like shyt and exposing me to diseases. I will be perfectly fine being single, I've never felt lonely when I was single. I don't need a man, if I have a man that means I wanted him but I can live without him and I'm not going to let him cheat on me just to say I have a man. and I will never let a man lead me.

did you see what you just said. "first time he got CAUGHT" . meaning what? he's been on it like that. you do realize moms even if she didnt catch him saw the signs and ignored them. why? for the reason she told you. she was so invested in this man that all things logical went out the window.

again the good book tells us how this is supposed to work. in order.:

First: God
2nd: Your Spouse
3rd: your kids

The reason God first is because God will take care of your spouse and your kids. meaning, he will help them on the spiritual side of things that you cant yet see, things that are behind closets(skeletons or sinful ways, etc.) So by them seeing you trust in God and do right them in everything you do. They will see how it works. and eventually hopefully they will follow your lead. there's no guarantees in a falling/broken world of sin. so get that out of your right now. aint no guarantees. all you can do is the play the hand you were dealt. if worse case scenario happens and your spouse does you dirty. chalk it up as a life lesson and keep it pushing(we're assuming it wasnt a mistake, this is who that person is. its in their character. thats something you cant change. thats something they have to work on by themselves.

as long as you realize a part of being married is putting your heart on the ground to be stepped on or picked up and caressed. its up to your spouse how he/she treats your heart. its not up to you how they treat your heart. there's nothing you can do to make them treat you RIGHT, Better, etc. NOTHING. get that in your head now. stop trying to change people. aint going to happen. now you can show them how to do better, pray with, and for them. give them the room to grow. be the first one to suggest seeing a counselor a psychiatrist, etc. as my wife says, human's are bruised fruit. all of us are. something(s) happened in your childhood that never sat well with you. dudes and chicks included. and you still aint right today. that has helped make you, who you are for better or for worse.

i still remember Ray Lewis(football player) telling his life story talking about his main reason for going so hard in football was to erase his dead beat dads high school records. and he did it. and he felt good doing it. cause he basically hated the man. that drove him to be a pro athlete. but that also semi drove him crazy. anytime you harboring that much resent towards someone for that many years. it will affect you in a negative way.

you get married to someone and you havent resolved that negative issue(those demons). the person you've married has their issues(demons). yall get together and now what? you had 2 demons and he had 2. thats 4 now for both of yall to deal with. dont throw no kids in the mix.

this is why you need to get ya self together as much as you possibly can FIRST before you jump into marriage. i dont care what nobody tells you. dont do it, until you've settled those underling issues. oh by the way you can be a good person and still have underlining issues you have not resolved with your past.

 

[The Wolf Among You]

People and their gender wars.

 

[PeridotPuss]

so women r meticulous plotters that pretend too seem vulnerable?

I have a hard time believing that, maybe for some women....but the majority get emotional connected, and feel hurt after

It's subtle, she may not even know why she's doing it

 

[PeridotPuss]

Women dont know what they want

We certainly know what we don't

 

[Slimkid07]

For centuries, if a woman was in a marriage that wasn't good for her or turned sour, she was trapped.
I think that stat is because of the strides of second wave feminism that's resulted in women being more independent from men.
Now, a woman can walk away from a bad situation without being looked at as a social pariah and she has almost as many options as men when it comes to achieving her socioeconomic goals.

 

[DrX]

It's subtle, she may not even know why she's doing it

i dont know...planning is a male thing....yall too emotional

 

[rapbeats]

You see these dudes in here talking about providing and protecting? Sounds good on the coli. But in real life these dudes prolly emotional, needy, clingy... all beta traits. The simple fact they think all women cheat is a beta trait. Points to low self esteem.

But little do these guys know, that's exactly what women find unattractive about them.

Women want men who act like men. All of that "cater to you", "my Nubian Queen" bullshyt is emasculating. Whether women realize the exact problem or not is irrelevant. They can smell it in the air and all they know is it's not attractive.

And when a man puts a woman on a pedestal, he's setting himself up for disappointment. Men create fantasy mates in their minds then lash out like immature little boys when the woman can't meet their completely unrealistic expectations. Now he's pouting like a lil girl, woman is feeling more and more towards him and he can't figure out why.

A couple is made up of 2 individuals. 2 individual, independent parts that come together to form the pair. They must be able to exist separately though. That's what a lot of men can't do. And that's why they have no luck with women. Take care of yourself first, then invite a woman into your life. These cats looking for an extension of their mother with a built in cum depository. They're not real men.

you're supposed to look for an extension of your mother. ASSUMING your mother was a good solid mother. FIRST OFF. thats issue number 1. if your mother wasnt a good person or a good mother. you have to be honest with self on this one. then it will be hell for you to find a good woman. because you wont know what one looks like. this is why its HARD for ladies to find a SOLID dude without a solid Father around. we're sponges. we only really know what we see with our own two eyes and hear with our own two ears. thats all we know. we are shaped by this.

my moms was a standup chick. but she has her ways. she's a yeller, wild out queen. as i call her. lol.

so guess who i end up hooking up with? wild out queens. even though i dont necessarily like all that yelling. i can deal with it because i was raised off that wild out. once i got old enough to understand why she was like that. it made my life better. she turned into that after being married to my pops dealing with his BS. and then divorcing him and having to take care of her kids by herself. sure pops came thru from time to time. but he wasnt holding it down like he should have. thats just keeping it 150.
since this is the case. she was angry, upset, and if nothing else Frustrated and fatigued. there's a reason why they say it takes two or really a village to raise a child. let alone 2 or more. It took me a while to realize what moms was missing by not having that stand up husband as our father around 24/7. there are times when a woman's anxiety and illogical ways start to kick in and they will go from 0 to 10 in 2 secs. you need a husband to be like "bae...bae.... its just a basketball game... he'll be alright honey..ok..you know what. dont worry about it, i'll take him to practice today. "

i saw pops come thru on occasion and cool moms down. then i realized> OHHHHHHH, i see how this is supposed to work. its good cop bad cop on the kids. its hard for a single parent to be the disciplinarian and the nice guy/girl at the same time. its a reason why its easy for pro athlete daddy's to come home and get all the love from their kids. they always come home baring gifts and smiling. (aside from adrian peterson.lol).. these dudes aint getting on their kids about this or that nearly as much as moms is. moms is dealing with them daily. he deals with them a few hours out of the day or a few days a week. its not the same. that takes toll.

but moms was a supersmart chick too. so guess who i end up with? a super smart wild out chick.

i tried the quiet ones, super cute but doesnt have a lot upstairs. never worked for me.

and its because all i know is my mom. thats the reality of it. i know she was a solid chick. so my instincts say if i choose a younger version of her i cant go wrong.

most men probably dont realize they some what hate/dislike women. you ever look at history and see how men have treated women for no reason at all?

one reason is because when pops was out trying to bring home the bacon(literally back in the day)... mom was at the house giving you the beats and yelling at you about things you need to do to become a great person. all that pushing you stuff is good for you. but it can somewhat anger you. especially in a scenario where moms is all by herself doing it 24/7. she's upset with you at times she shouldnt be because she's literally too tired to be a parent at that moment. so she's more upset with her situation then she is with you. but since you're family and you're in close proximity you end up catching some of that hell. some mothers have this a lot worse than others. this shapes us Dudes.

Your mad at women because your mom raised you in anger in a lot of situations. which is somewhat her fault. a lot of your pops fault. and if you're black. it was more the white mans fault for setting up this scenario in the black population to begin with.

white women say its hard to be a woman. imagine how hard it is to be a BLACK woman with 2+ kids on your hip. and you did it the right way in marriage? doesnt matter. you pushing the stroller just like the baby mama chick with 3 baby daddys.

 

[AAKing23]

It be like that sometimes

 

[(Lean Ambrose)]

Your Avi made this comment even more hilarious.

how so?...
Explain...

 

[Hungry Rabbit]

They leave because they feel that they can do better than the man they are with, or that the men they are with aren't worth anything.

And they feel these things because the men suck at managing and gaming their women.

The men suck at managing their women, in part, because women don't suffer the consequences of disloyalty like they once did in recent history, but also because a lot of men aren't as valuable or special as they think they are.

 

[Ashley Banks]

did you see what you just said. "first time he got CAUGHT" . meaning what? he's been on it like that. you do realize moms even if she didnt catch him saw the signs and ignored them. why? for the reason she told you. she was so invested in this man that all things logical went out the window.

again the good book tells us how this is supposed to work. in order.:

First: God
2nd: Your Spouse
3rd: your kids

The reason God first is because God will take care of your spouse and your kids. meaning, he will help them on the spiritual side of things that you cant yet see, things that are behind closets(skeletons or sinful ways, etc.) So by them seeing you trust in God and do right them in everything you do. They will see how it works. and eventually hopefully they will follow your lead. there's no guarantees in a falling/broken world of sin. so get that out of your right now. aint no guarantees. all you can do is the play the hand you were dealt. if worse case scenario happens and your spouse does you dirty. chalk it up as a life lesson and keep it pushing(we're assuming it wasnt a mistake, this is who that person is. its in their character. thats something you cant change. thats something they have to work on by themselves.

as long as you realize a part of being married is putting your heart on the ground to be stepped on or picked up and caressed. its up to your spouse how he/she treats your heart. its not up to you how they treat your heart. there's nothing you can do to make them treat you RIGHT, Better, etc. NOTHING. get that in your head now. stop trying to change people. aint going to happen. now you can show them how to do better, pray with, and for them. give them the room to grow. be the first one to suggest seeing a counselor a psychiatrist, etc. as my wife says, human's are bruised fruit. all of us are. something(s) happened in your childhood that never sat well with you. dudes and chicks included. and you still aint right today. that has helped make you, who you are for better or for worse.

i still remember Ray Lewis(football player) telling his life story talking about his main reason for going so hard in football was to erase his dead beat dads high school records. and he did it. and he felt good doing it. cause he basically hated the man. that drove him to be a pro athlete. but that also semi drove him crazy. anytime you harboring that much resent towards someone for that many years. it will affect you in a negative way.

you get married to someone and you havent resolved that negative issue(those demons). the person you've married has their issues(demons). yall get together and now what? you had 2 demons and he had 2. thats 4 now for both of yall to deal with. dont throw no kids in the mix.

this is why you need to get ya self together as much as you possibly can FIRST before you jump into marriage. i dont care what nobody tells you. dont do it, until you've settled those underling issues. oh by the way you can be a good person and still have underlining issues you have not resolved with your past.

Oh my god she didn't know, let it go.

 

[Ashley Banks]

Im guessing ur still single

Getting married in October I've literally said this a billion times.

 

[Jesus Shuttlesworth]

you're supposed to look for an extension of your mother. ASSUMING your mother was a good solid mother. FIRST OFF. thats issue number 1. if your mother wasnt a good person or a good mother. you have to be honest with self on this one. then it will be hell for you to find a good woman. because you wont know what one looks like. this is why its HARD for ladies to find a SOLID dude without a solid Father around. we're sponges. we only really know what we see with our own two eyes and hear with our own two ears. thats all we know. we are shaped by this.

my moms was a standup chick. but she has her ways. she's a yeller, wild out queen. as i call her. lol.

so guess who i end up hooking up with? wild out queens. even though i dont necessarily like all that yelling. i can deal with it because i was raised off that wild out. once i got old enough to understand why she was like that. it made my life better. she turned into that after being married to my pops dealing with his BS. and then divorcing him and having to take care of her kids by herself. sure pops came thru from time to time. but he wasnt holding it down like he should have. thats just keeping it 150.
since this is the case. she was angry, upset, and if nothing else Frustrated and fatigued. there's a reason why they say it takes two or really a village to raise a child. let alone 2 or more. It took me a while to realize what moms was missing by not having that stand up husband as our father around 24/7. there are times when a woman's anxiety and illogical ways start to kick in and they will go from 0 to 10 in 2 secs. you need a husband to be like "bae...bae.... its just a basketball game... he'll be alright honey..ok..you know what. dont worry about it, i'll take him to practice today. "

i saw pops come thru on occasion and cool moms down. then i realized> OHHHHHHH, i see how this is supposed to work. its good cop bad cop on the kids. its hard for a single parent to be the disciplinarian and the nice guy/girl at the same time. its a reason why its easy for pro athlete daddy's to come home and get all the love from their kids. they always come home baring gifts and smiling. (aside from adrian peterson.lol).. these dudes aint getting on their kids about this or that nearly as much as moms is. moms is dealing with them daily. he deals with them a few hours out of the day or a few days a week. its not the same. that takes toll.

but moms was a supersmart chick too. so guess who i end up with? a super smart wild out chick.

i tried the quiet ones, super cute but doesnt have a lot upstairs. never worked for me.

and its because all i know is my mom. thats the reality of it. i know she was a solid chick. so my instincts say if i choose a younger version of her i cant go wrong.

Nah that's not what I'm talking bout, breh. When I say extension of mother I mean becoming dependent. nikkas can't pay their bills without their chick's help. nikkas getting emotional and wanting hugs and shyt. Not wanting that leadership role. When I say extension of mommy, I don't mean a woman like mommy, I mean a woman who takes care of them like mommy used to because they're not able to stand on their own 2.

I'm not even saying you're wrong, just that that's not what I was referring to.

 

[PeridotPuss]

They leave because they feel that they can do better than the man they are with, or that the men they are with aren't worth anything.

And they feel these things because the men suck at managing and gaming their women.

The men suck at managing their women, in part, because women don't suffer the consequences of disloyalty like they once did in recent history, but also because a lot of men aren't as valuable or special as they think they are.

so you're saying men should game and women supposed to be loyal to a gaming ass nikka??????? why would she do that? That mindset seems doomed to fail

 

[DrX]

Getting married in October I've literally said this a billion times.

thats good, but let the dude get some outside box...itll keep him happy...no man wanna smash the same box for a long time