What's The Most Simp S*** You Ever Did (Simp Confessions)

[CouldntBeMeTho]

I know breh. Even told her I loved her and she said,

"Thanks for telling me."

 

[WhereIsTheLove]

2010 was my Simping year to a T ( I was a junior in high school at this time). Here's one the more memorable ones (to me at least).
1. High School Girlfriend starts dating a football player from another school two weeks after we broke up (I was baffled how can she move on so fast) Oh how fukking naive I was breh. I call her to make amends but she says she's moved on and she's meeting him at the park soon...I tell her I'll escort her to her park date. I did it because my dumb-ass female friend infected my head with titanic-esque BS and told me she'll run back to me on Rose shyt if I poured my heart out. (I lost my virginity to this girl so the attachment was strong AF). I walk her to the park and we're chilling at the park bench. At first, he's a no show, she gets upset so I try to only to get shot down and a half an hour later this Ray Lewis built dude walks to our direction and she gets a fukking twinkle in her eye.

She tells me goodbye and runs off with him and I walk home in absolute defeat. I shaped up really quick after that humiliation.

 

[Diondon]

True story #facts
I was a broke, unemployed college student
and was stressing how to buy this chick I was fukking that had a man, diamond earrings for Christmas
Thankfully, logic kicked in

 

[WhereIsTheLove]

The most simp shyt I ever heard was on an episode of the 5150 show. This nikka Corey said Chicago got hit with a bad snowstorm one year and this girl who he was talking to called him because her car was stuck in snow. So he shoots over there to dig out her car. While he's digging her whip out he leaves his car running so it's hot when it's time for him to cut. So when he finally gets done his car battery died and he asks the chick for a jump. Do you know this bytch responded with something to the effect of "I don't want you messing my car up" and drove off

 

[Mike809]

Back in like 2005/2006 , I had a girlfriend that I been dating for almost a month and Valentine's Day was coming up . I didn't have any money with me since I didn't have a job . My brother just recently gifted me a psp so for some stupid stupid I decided to sell it at a pawnshop (didn't even know minors could do this) got 100 dollars for it , bought her a medium size teddy bear , earrings she wanted and can't remember what else . Anyways , she gave me a "finding nemo" teddy bear which I really think she just found laying someone in her apartment. Then she broke up with me a week later lol I got to smash two times at least . Right now she kind of famous on IG and when she be posting thirst traps , I be sliding down her DM with no success
Can't wait to be rich

 

[Brandsdale]

I can't say it. Ya'll would clown me forever

heard it all on this website. There's virtually nothing that can be as embarassing than what we've already read

 

[WhereIsTheLove]

Asked my ex, who was my female best friend at the time, out when I knew she was in love with her guy best friend from childhood, cause I was in love with her

Ended about as bad as you'd expect

Make a female your best friend when she has another guy who is her best friend then ask her out not without examining the risks brehs

 

[sanityovar8ted]

I used to give my 1st husband half my paycheck erry Friday

 

[WaveGang]

Prob when I was about 20...

Chilled outside the club for like 2hrs with my friend waiting for this girl who was inside. When the club ended she literally said hi and bye. Idk why my friend even entertained us chilling there, she was fat too smh

 

[Diondon]

I used to give my 1st husband half my paycheck erry Friday

You can't simp your spouse, beloved.

 

[WhereIsTheLove]

Back in like 2005/2006 , I had a girlfriend that I been dating for almost a month and Valentine's Day was coming up . I didn't have any money with me since I didn't have a job . My brother just recently gifted me a psp so for some stupid stupid I decided to sell it at a pawnshop (didn't even know minors could do this) got 100 dollars for it , bought her a medium size teddy bear , earrings she wanted and can't remember what else . Anyways , she gave me a "finding nemo" teddy bear which I really think she just found laying someone in her apartment. Then she broke up with me a week later lol I got to smash two times at least . Right now she kind of famous on IG and when she be posting thirst traps , I be sliding down her DM with no success
Can't wait to be rich

Your brother had to be all kinds of

 

[sanityovar8ted]

You can't simp your spouse, beloved.

Well to me it was simping cuz the BYTCH ass nikka was cheating

 

[Mike809]

Your brother had to be all kinds of

He never found out and sadly passed away last December , one of my biggest regret just because he bought that for me . I still have a cup he bought me when I was like 10 that has my name on it. Barely even use it just not to break it lol .

 

[MarloStanTrill]

Told a bih I eat p*ssy even though I don't

u dont eat p*ssy u aint hittin it right either #facts

 

[WhereIsTheLove]

He never found out and sadly passed away last December , one of my biggest regret just because he bought that for me . I still have a cup he bought me when I was like 10 that has my name on it. Barely even use it just not to break it lol .

Damn sorry to hear that breh. Was he young?