Essential The Official Coli Horror Film Thread: Discussion, Recommendations And Murder.

[storyteller]

Speaking of Rob Zombie, I watched 23 for the first time and it's bizarre as all hell but I enjoyed it. I just don't categorize it as a horror movie. It's more an action-thriller than anything. Felt like a Rob Zombie take on the throwback "Running Man" with completely over the top villains and action. It's dark, oddly comedic for something so twisted and I found myself really interested in where they'd take it next. Also...the Running Man is a childhood favorite of mine so that helped.

 

[Jello Biafra]

What in the 3 Devil's Rejects From Hell on Salem's Lot is this???!!!! Why would you do this and what for!!!!????

It's my Halloween gift for you.
And there are more...

 

[Jello Biafra]

This man @Jello Biafra watched a movie he know he doesn’t like knowing damn well he wouldn’t have a single good thing to say about it. All out of spite

That’s hateful

 

[Jello Biafra]

Castle Rock season 2 is a huge improvement over season 1.

It's more traditional and just a whole lot less of it being pretentious and up its own ass being a low quality art house show.

I love a good art show, but season 1 was just boring ass.

Season 2 isn't scary, but it's atleast engaging and entertaining

I've only watched two episodes so far and I'm liking it.
It seems to be a more coherent narrative than what we got in the first season.

 

[Jello Biafra]

31

The Good
I’ll just let Det. Frank Drebin handle this one. Take it away, Frank!

You heard the man…scram! Aint nothing good coming from this movie.

The Bad
It is hard to narrow down all that was wrong with this cacophony of dreadfulness but I’ll try to address the most egregious cinematic crimes Rob Zombie committed in this movie:
The characters are not just vapid or paper thin, nope all of these characters are obnoxiously unlikable to the point that you wish they would all disappear or at the very least be rendered mute for the duration of the film.
The direction is like something a 14 year old would make after being given his first video camera.
I can’t believe that there was an actual script for this movie. I am leaning more towards the idea that Zombie gave his cast a general outline of what the movie was and told them to just make up shyt as they went along.
A homicidal Nazi dwarf who spoke Spanish probably seemed like a good idea during a long weed smoking session but it didn’t translate well to film at all.

I get that Zombie loves his wife and likes working with her but Sherri Moon Zombie is an atrocious actress and would be disappointing in a bit part part let alone as the lead in a movie. So cut it out with the nepotism, Mr. Zombie.
Also Malcolm McDowell, Meg Foster, Judy Geeson and Jane Carr deserve much better from the entertainment biz in these twilight years of their careers than having to star in Rob Zombie’s semi-annual schlockfests.

The Ugly
Why would anyone with a lick of common sense think it was a good idea to ask Lawrence Hilton-Jacobs to try and affect a Jamaican accent? And after seeing how comically bad his attempt was why wouldn’t someone nip that nonsense in the bud? Was Zombie high while shooting this?

Final Verdict
A chaotic, sloppy, incoherent assault on the senses that is more obnoxious than being trapped on an airplane with a cabin full of crying babies; 31 is just another of Rob Zombie’s overly indulgent home movies that has officially wiped away any previous misconceptions that Zombie might have it in him to be a decent filmmaker. Utter trash.

31 gets nothing from me and gets laughed at by Capt. Spaulding for being so garbage:

 

[Nicole0416_718_929_646212]

It's my Halloween gift for you.
And there are more...

Do you prefer your casket open or closed?working on a few things myself.

 

[Nicole0416_718_929_646212]

31

The Good
I’ll just let Det. Frank Drebin handle this one. Take it away, Frank!

You heard the man…scram! Aint nothing good coming from this movie.

The Bad
It is hard to narrow down all that was wrong with this cacophony of dreadfulness but I’ll try to address the most egregious cinematic crimes Rob Zombie committed in this movie:
The characters are not just vapid or paper thin, nope all of these characters are obnoxiously unlikable to the point that you wish they would all disappear or at the very least be rendered mute for the duration of the film.
The direction is like something a 14 year old would make after being given his first video camera.
I can’t believe that there was an actual script for this movie. I am leaning more towards the idea that Zombie gave his cast a general outline of what the movie was and told them to just make up shyt as they went along.
A homicidal Nazi dwarf who spoke Spanish probably seemed like a good idea during a long weed smoking session but it didn’t translate well to film at all.

I get that Zombie loves his wife and likes working with her but Sherri Moon Zombie is an atrocious actress and would be disappointing in a bit part part let alone as the lead in a movie. So cut it out with the nepotism, Mr. Zombie.
Also Malcolm McDowell, Meg Foster, Judy Geeson and Jane Carr deserve much better from the entertainment biz in these twilight years of their careers than having to star in Rob Zombie’s semi-annual schlockfests.

The Ugly
Why would anyone with a lick of common sense think it was a good idea to ask Lawrence Hilton-Jacobs to try and affect a Jamaican accent? And after seeing how comically bad his attempt was why wouldn’t someone nip that nonsense in the bud? Was Zombie high while shooting this?

Final Verdict
A chaotic, sloppy, incoherent assault on the senses that is more obnoxious than being trapped on an airplane with a cabin full of crying babies; 31 is just another of Rob Zombie’s overly indulgent home movies that has officially wiped away any previous misconceptions that Zombie might have it in him to be a decent filmmaker. Utter trash.

31 gets nothing from me and gets laughed at by Capt. Spaulding for being so garbage:

HOW ARE YOU WRITING ANOTHER ONE WHEN I HAVENT RESPONDED TO THE FIRST ONE YET!!!?? JUST STOP
you are purposely watching these movies just to trash and bash them. your write ups are garbage, your thought process is biased and don't come back with any more until I have a chance to address this

 

[MartyMcFly]

HOW ARE YOU WRITING ANOTHER ONE WHEN I HAVENT RESPONDED TO THE FIRST ONE YET!!!?? JUST STOP
you are purposely watching these movies just to trash and bash them. your write ups are garbage, your thought process is biased and don't come back with any more until I have a chance to address this

Man is taking valuable time out his days just to dump on these flicks

 

[Neuromancer]

Might discontinue the masters of horror.

 

[BXKingPin82]

For the longest time I always felt like A Weekend at Bernie's was a horror movie.

That shyt was NOT funny!

 

[Nicole0416_718_929_646212]

Man is taking valuable time out his days just to dump on these flicks

I'm saying!!!!! I haven't watched these films in years, I need time to rewatch them and post up!!!! Then he goes and comments 2 films back to back, nothing but his negative RZ refrain, that's not right - let me at least get my thought process together - putting out back to back disses

 

[Nicole0416_718_929_646212]

Might discontinue the masters of horror.

For what reason?

 

[Neuromancer]

.

 

[Neuromancer]

For what reason?

Abysmal turn out.

 

[Nicole0416_718_929_646212]

31




The Bad
It is hard to narrow down all that was wrong with this cacophony of dreadfulness but I’ll try to address the most egregious cinematic crimes Rob Zombie committed in this movie:
The characters are not just vapid or paper thin, nope all of these characters are obnoxiously unlikable to the point that you wish they would all disappear or at the very least be rendered mute for the duration of the film.
The direction is like something a 14 year old would make after being given his first video camera.
I can’t believe that there was an actual script for this movie. I am leaning more towards the idea that Zombie gave his cast a general outline of what the movie was and told them to just make up shyt as they went along.
A homicidal Nazi dwarf who spoke Spanish probably seemed like a good idea during a long weed smoking session but it didn’t translate well to film at all.

I get that Zombie loves his wife and likes working with her but Sherri Moon Zombie is an atrocious actress and would be disappointing in a bit part part let alone as the lead in a movie. So cut it out with the nepotism, Mr. Zombie.
Also Malcolm McDowell, Meg Foster, Judy Geeson and Jane Carr deserve much better from the entertainment biz in these twilight years of their careers than having to star in Rob Zombie’s semi-annual schlockfests.



Final Verdict
A chaotic, sloppy, incoherent assault on the senses that is more obnoxious than being trapped on an airplane with a cabin full of crying babies; 31 is just another of Rob Zombie’s overly indulgent home movies that has officially wiped away any previous misconceptions that Zombie might have it in him to be a decent filmmaker. Utter trash.

31 gets nothing from me and gets laughed at by Capt. Spaulding for being so garbage: