beenz
Rap Guerilla
Aw he'll naw at the german bytch giving u hitlers broads name 
The General Mills Chronicles.
- Thread starter General Mills
- Start date
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- Tags
- rafters
malbaker86
Gators
General Mills
More often than not I tend to take that L.
General tha GAWD! Ive been laughing out loud like a mad man reading all these stories as they come, got a nikka wishin I had a timemachine so I could go to te future and read all of the stories already
This nikka General is the Nas of the internet with the impecable storytelling yo
Gracias based General, keep cooking sire. I live in Finland btw so Im lookig forward to the Finland story
Breh. I took a Win and then a massive L in Finland.
This is by far the best thread on the Coli. 
General Mills
More often than not I tend to take that L.
After all the jokey jokes. At my expense..
We continued to parlay. Eva or whatever her name was got scooped up by this flabby kid! He walks in the club. Walks right up to where we were in VIP. She see's him and she is all 
Oh Kurt!! And runs over. . gives him a huge hug. Looks at all of us and says she will be right back. .
I never saw her again.
So I am sitting here swagless while my two homies are partnered up.
I am desperate to find something. ANYTHING. I see a chick with a frizzy top. She is probably a 5 on a scale to 10. Body was 
Face was 
I gave it my best shot. Had her laughing and dancing. We are all leaving when she says. . Lets go for a ride.
I tell the homies I will meet them on the pier in a bit. She had a lil ass Rabbit.
We ride for a minute. Get to this secluded park and start getting down.
I move us to the backseat so I can get more leverage. . . She was tight as fukk. But I managed. I am deep in the puss when I hear a tap on the window. . And then we are bathed in white. Its a flashlight. . . With a cop on the other end. 
We continued to parlay. Eva or whatever her name was got scooped up by this flabby kid! He walks in the club. Walks right up to where we were in VIP. She see's him and she is all Oh Kurt!! And runs over. . gives him a huge hug. Looks at all of us and says she will be right back. . I never saw her again.
So I am sitting here swagless while my two homies are partnered up.
I am desperate to find something. ANYTHING. I see a chick with a frizzy top. She is probably a 5 on a scale to 10. Body was Face was I gave it my best shot. Had her laughing and dancing. We are all leaving when she says. . Lets go for a ride.
I tell the homies I will meet them on the pier in a bit. She had a lil ass Rabbit.
We ride for a minute. Get to this secluded park and start getting down.
I move us to the backseat so I can get more leverage. . . She was tight as fukk. But I managed. I am deep in the puss when I hear a tap on the window. . And then we are bathed in white. Its a flashlight. . . With a cop on the other end.
General Mills
More often than not I tend to take that L.
Im scrambling pulling up my draws and pants. 
fukk!! We roll down the window. Cop is looking at us amused. 
Having a bit of fun out here heh?
He then looks at my girl. Amazingly he knows her by name. . .
Cop - Anna. tsk tsk tsk
Anna - Hey. We were almost done!
Me -
Cop tells us to get out of here and to take it to a house or hotel. He leaves. . I look down and go to take off my condom. . .There is nothing there. . Meanwhile she has her leg cocked up and is picking out rubber fragments. . .
The shyt busted.
She did not seem concerned at all. I decided to go back to the ship. Everything was just too weird.
Actually forgot all about it until a week or too later. We are already gone from Germany. I go to
and
Anna burnt the fukk out of me. .
Nobody would have known either. . I went to see Doc on the ship. Everything is of course confidential. I am in there. I tell him I am leaking. . And it BURNSSSSS. He tells me what he thinks it is and tells me they have to do some tests. Until it clears up I cant leave the ship. etc. .
I am sitting down when a door from the back opens up. . Its one of my HOMIES. He was in the back waiting room because he hit his hand in the engine room. He looks at me.
fukk!! We roll down the window. Cop is looking at us amused. Having a bit of fun out here heh? He then looks at my girl. Amazingly he knows her by name. . .
Cop - Anna. tsk tsk tsk
Anna - Hey. We were almost done!
Me -
Cop tells us to get out of here and to take it to a house or hotel. He leaves. . I look down and go to take off my condom. . .There is nothing there. .
Meanwhile she has her leg cocked up and is picking out rubber fragments. . . The shyt busted.
She did not seem concerned at all. I decided to go back to the ship. Everything was just too weird.Actually forgot all about it until a week or too later. We are already gone from Germany. I go to
and Anna burnt the fukk out of me. .
Nobody would have known either. . I went to see Doc on the ship. Everything is of course confidential. I am in there. I tell him I am leaking. . And it BURNSSSSS. He tells me what he thinks it is and tells me they have to do some tests. Until it clears up I cant leave the ship. etc. . I am sitting down when a door from the back opens up. . Its one of my HOMIES. He was in the back waiting room because he hit his hand in the engine room. He looks at me.
yeahisaidit
All Star
I'm fukking dying!!!!
Generalllllllll!!!
Generalllllllll!!!
General Mills
More often than not I tend to take that L.
This niglet heard everything. Look at me and goes 
Then he starts 
I begged that nikka not to say anything. . 
By the time I left sick bay. . The whole ship knew. 
Next up. . Turkey. (These are not in order of when we arrived. I honestly dont remember.)
In Turkey the police were involved. As well as Prostitutes, pimps, a New Kid on the boat and my Captain.
We get there and not to far from we were berthed at was this huge outside market. They sold everything from food to fabric and name brand clothes. We are there for a minute peeping the scene. It was hot as hell outside!
We see
these hookers across the street. We soon notice a pattern.
1. They were standing outside of a park.
2. Beside them was a trash can.
3. John's would drive up or walk up. Converse with the ho's. Then give the girls money.
4. The girls would put the money in a bag and put it on top of the trash can.
5. Then they would take their trick into the park into some bushes out of site.
Now there were three girls working there. They were doing Walmart numbers! Frequently all three chicks would be in the woods. . And that bag of money was just sitting there perched on that garbage can. Overflowing with cash!! 
Brehs. . i thought of a foolproof plan to get paid. . Sadly I did not account for all variables. .
Then he starts I begged that nikka not to say anything. . By the time I left sick bay. . The whole ship knew. Next up. . Turkey. (These are not in order of when we arrived. I honestly dont remember.)
In Turkey the police were involved. As well as Prostitutes, pimps, a New Kid on the boat and my Captain.
We get there and not to far from we were berthed at was this huge outside market. They sold everything from food to fabric and name brand clothes. We are there for a minute peeping the scene. It was hot as hell outside!
We see
these hookers across the street. We soon notice a pattern. 1. They were standing outside of a park.
2. Beside them was a trash can.
3. John's would drive up or walk up. Converse with the ho's. Then give the girls money.
4. The girls would put the money in a bag and put it on top of the trash can.
5. Then they would take their trick into the park into some bushes out of site.
Now there were three girls working there. They were doing Walmart numbers!
Frequently all three chicks would be in the woods. . And that bag of money was just sitting there perched on that garbage can. Overflowing with cash!! Brehs. . i thought of a foolproof plan to get paid. . Sadly I did not account for all variables. .
General Mills
More often than not I tend to take that L.
This is by far the best thread on the Coli.
Thanks BREH! My pain is your pleasure.
B90X
All Star
This niglet heard everything. Look at me and goes
Next up. . Turkey. (These are not in order of when we arrived. I honestly dont remember.)
In Turkey the police were involved. As well as Prostitutes, pimps, a New Kid on the boat and my Captain.
We get there and not to far from we were berthed at was this huge outside market. They sold everything from food to fabric and name brand clothes. We are there for a minute peeping the scene. It was hot as hell outside!
We see
1. They were standing outside of a park.
2. Beside them was a trash can.
3. John's would drive up or walk up. Converse with the ho's. Then give the girls money.
4. The girls would put the money in a bag and put it on top of the trash can.
5. Then they would take their trick into the park into some bushes out of site.
Now there were three girls working there. They were doing Walmart numbers!
Brehs. . i thought of a foolproof plan to get paid. . Sadly I did not account for all variables. .
Another classic on the way...
malbaker86
Gators
General Mills
More often than not I tend to take that L.
Another note. . In that outside market. The show owners wanted to haggle. They would take money. . but they really wanted something of value to trade with. One thing we all found out rather quickly that they wanted was this exactly.
Zippo lighters with our ships insignia on it. They went HAM over this! So that first day we went back to the ship. We bought out the ship store's selection of Zippos.
And sold them to other cats on the ship at a higher price to use at haggling. They knew they could get tons of stuff from the vendors with those Zippos.
When we were looking at the ho's we saw more than one sailor giving ho's Zippos!
And they were accepting. We sat on a park bench across the street from the ho's and mapped out our plan.
1. We were about a mile from the ship. But you could SEE the ship. It was a straight shot.
2. We needed to pick a time that was perfect. When all three ho's were occupied with dikk. And when that bag was at its max. Overflowing with cash.
3. We needed a dude with some serious jets to scoop up the bag. . And make a beeline straight to the ship where he would be safe.
4. We all split up the profits.
Zippo lighters with our ships insignia on it. They went HAM over this! So that first day we went back to the ship. We bought out the ship store's selection of Zippos.
And sold them to other cats on the ship at a higher price to use at haggling. They knew they could get tons of stuff from the vendors with those Zippos.When we were looking at the ho's we saw more than one sailor giving ho's Zippos!
And they were accepting. We sat on a park bench across the street from the ho's and mapped out our plan.1. We were about a mile from the ship. But you could SEE the ship. It was a straight shot.
2. We needed to pick a time that was perfect. When all three ho's were occupied with dikk.
And when that bag was at its max. Overflowing with cash.3. We needed a dude with some serious jets to scoop up the bag. . And make a beeline straight to the ship where he would be safe.
4. We all split up the profits.
Shugg84
Banned
1. We were about a mile from the ship. But you could SEE the ship. It was a straight shot.
2. We needed to pick a time that was perfect. When all three ho's were occupied with dikk.
3. We needed a dude with some serious jets to scoop up the bag. . And make a beeline straight to the ship where he would be safe.
4. We all split up the profits.
