I hold grudges.
When I was 8-9 my mama was in
a relationship with an abusive man
that put hands on her.....I dreamed
of killing him as a child.
saw him when i was around 15-16 working
at a liquor store and he tried to shake my hand.
I didnt shake his hand and told him to take care/be safe....some shyt.
I was moving powder so my paper was coming in.
I had the shyt beaten out of him for over 10 years.
work,leaving his crib,bus stop,store......didnt matter.
didnt want him dead just paranoid and living
in fear all while not knowing why.
he died a year and some change ago
homeless and hiding in cali alone.
I cant give you an educated answer on forgiveness.
