Mr Hate Coffee
Veteran
Bro, that's how you gotta be! I'm at the same point. I don't have time for the guessing games.
Essential Quick Lil Gems on Dealing with Women
- Thread starter Rominati
- Start date
Bro, that's how you gotta be! I'm at the same point. I don't have time for the guessing games.
For those who are in relationships who are currently experiencing difficulties, I have some advice for you.
First you have to admit to yourselves that you are having difficulties in your relationship because your woman doesn't respect you as the authority figure or the "head" of your relationship.
I'm not sure how this even started, but we have conformed to the belief that it is our responsibility to make things right in our relationships.
Understand that you can't make a woman respect you. She must naturally do so, and this is done thru strong leadership and decisiveness. Your word must be your word, and you must carry out all consequences. You must establish rules, guidelines, and boundaries. Your woman must always be aware, not thru words, but actions, that being with you is a privilege.
You must also respect your woman. Don't call her out her name, belittle her, or do anything negative towards her, because after all, if she is these such horrible things, why are you still with her? You should leave. A lot of brothers will belittle a woman, and then wonders why she either blatantly or subliminally disrespects you.
The moment you feel that you can no longer treat this woman with respect, it is time to end the relationship. Nothing good can come from it.
A woman that refuses to be lead, should be left. You wouldn't attempt to domesticate a tiger would you? Some people have tried, but history proves that the tiger will be a tiger and eventually harm the owner. Why be with a woman who will eventually become belligerent and defiant. Leave her in the wild.
Also be firm and assertive with your communication. Be firm with your "yes" and "no". If woman feels you can manipulate your no into a yes, she will, and then your word will have no value.
Be loving and affectionate towards her, but be manly. She should be the one craving affection, and you should be the one complimenting it. It is so pathetic when a man is craving affection from his woman in a relationship. If she's not automatically being affectionate towards you, then her connection with you is not strong, and you should question if this is the type of relationship you should be in.
You will almost definitely be challenged by your woman during your relationship, but as long as you are firm, discipline, and keep your word, you can't lose. If the first blow is the strongest and hardest, she will think twice before she raises up again.
First you have to admit to yourselves that you are having difficulties in your relationship because your woman doesn't respect you as the authority figure or the "head" of your relationship.
I'm not sure how this even started, but we have conformed to the belief that it is our responsibility to make things right in our relationships.
Understand that you can't make a woman respect you. She must naturally do so, and this is done thru strong leadership and decisiveness. Your word must be your word, and you must carry out all consequences. You must establish rules, guidelines, and boundaries. Your woman must always be aware, not thru words, but actions, that being with you is a privilege.
You must also respect your woman. Don't call her out her name, belittle her, or do anything negative towards her, because after all, if she is these such horrible things, why are you still with her? You should leave. A lot of brothers will belittle a woman, and then wonders why she either blatantly or subliminally disrespects you.
The moment you feel that you can no longer treat this woman with respect, it is time to end the relationship. Nothing good can come from it.
A woman that refuses to be lead, should be left. You wouldn't attempt to domesticate a tiger would you? Some people have tried, but history proves that the tiger will be a tiger and eventually harm the owner. Why be with a woman who will eventually become belligerent and defiant. Leave her in the wild.
Also be firm and assertive with your communication. Be firm with your "yes" and "no". If woman feels you can manipulate your no into a yes, she will, and then your word will have no value.
Be loving and affectionate towards her, but be manly. She should be the one craving affection, and you should be the one complimenting it. It is so pathetic when a man is craving affection from his woman in a relationship. If she's not automatically being affectionate towards you, then her connection with you is not strong, and you should question if this is the type of relationship you should be in.
You will almost definitely be challenged by your woman during your relationship, but as long as you are firm, discipline, and keep your word, you can't lose. If the first blow is the strongest and hardest, she will think twice before she raises up again.
any women who tells me that all my exes were a$$holes, they all cheated on em etc. means to me RUN
this is what happens 95% of the time
your the sweetest guy i ever dated
wow your the first guy who ever bought me flowers,
wow your the first guy who ever took me insert place
wow your the first guy who showed me he really cared about me
wow your the first guy who actually respected me
no drama no fights,
girl hes so sweet and really caresa bout me, he hasn';tc heated or hit on me, but there is just something about him that bugs me.
ex "a$$hole" pokes her on on fb or texts her
a) texts turn to k, or take hours to get a reply, shes to busy to hang out and you get the we need to talk
b) she hooks up with mr unpredictable, mr drama that tingles her spine and your dikk starts to piss razor blades
ive dated many chicks whose exes were a$$holes, cheaters, abusers, its what they are accustomed to unless they never got therapy
You see, for a lot of guys my age who want to date somebody that’s our age – the game is kinda fukked up if we go by the “damaged goods” logic.
I think by the time a woman hits 30, she’s done a WHOLE lot in her life already (at least, in terms of experience with the opposite sex and relationships and thangs of that nature, did).
But to write them off because of their (possibly, not to use the term “ratchet” but eventful) history is kind of a tough subject. I know its easy for every to say, “Just forget ‘em – fukk ‘em and leave ‘em” ideology.
The gal I’m seeing now was in long term relationships, it’s just unfortunate that she didn’t choose the right men – everybody has to grow and experience things and learn from them.
Does that imply that she is a reformed “insert floozy type expletive here”?
Not everybody is going to live the pristine and untainted lifestyles our mothers lived.
But like I said, I know what’s going on and I am very cautious of how I treat these ladies and closely monitor their behaviors/actions, words and try to forecasts any dangers so that I don’t see myself descending into those same pitfalls that caused me ill-attitudes and bitterness. The game (and yes, it is a game and will ALWAYS be a game) is dependent on how you play it. You let a broad walk all over you and take advantage of your resources, energy and time? That’s all on you cuz you didn’t know how to navigate the trenches of relationship-dom.
Tact is something that we seldom yet specifically target on... and this following is relative to how you approach the shiits:
Travesties in a relationship occur if you allow them to!
Like most men that reach a certain age and can only share stories that come dully equipped with dilemmas, misfortunes, ordeals and blunt force trauma to the heart, I understand why they feel the way they do – it’s because they didn’t see or acknowledge the warning signs. The red flags were ALWAYS there – but what did they do about it?
Nothing! They allowed themselves to slip into the pitfall of pitiful partners.
As men, we have to lead women. If that means you have to strike with an iron fist – then SO BE IT!
The reason why women commit infractions such as infidelity, excess spending, questionable domestic habits or divorce, is directly correlated to some BYTCH SHIIT YOU DID OR ALLOWED TO HAPPEN IN THE RELATIONSHIP!
If she doesn’t respect you, if she doesn’t fear you, if she can’t follow your lead and overall, not happy with how you are handling shiit – OF COURSE SHE’S GONNA TAKE THE CHILDREN, MONEY, HOUSE AND WHIPS cuz of something THE MAN NEGLECTED TO TAKE CARE OF!
Most times out of ten, some where along the time you first met her until the time she left you – you made a miscalculation and (unknowingly) took a mindless step in the path of destruction...
and the sad this is that he ain’t even know it!...
he ain't even know it.
Edit: While i was composing this post, Sharp was thinking and basically, writing the same thing in nature as i am.
Good shiit breigh.
.
When you stop screwing around in life and just worrying about things that are out of your control, a lot of things start opening up. Use your mind for something really productive. There are people creating amazing things in life, and you really should be one of them. You only have so much life, so you have to make the absolute best of it. Focus your energy on creating something, helping others, and of just learning something useful.
You don't want to look back on life and realize how much of it you wasted 'chasing women' and just dealing with the nonsense that is going on in this day and age. Make no mistakes about it, relationships should not be this much work. You shouldn't have to engage in all these mental gymnastics and constantly be watching your back, but because of the low moral character floating around these days, if you don't watch yourself, you're setting yourself up. When you come to the realization that it's not anything you're doing wrong, you just have to know that sometimes you just need to step out of the game. There is no point in playing a game in which you incur large risks, but you have little reward if you win.
You have to have an investor's mentality... Not necessarily in the aspect of investing your money, but more along the lines of investing ANYTHING. You only have a limited amount of time, so you should invest it in activities that bring a high level of return and remove those activities that are liabilities or bring a low level of return in your life. That is how you really start to get ahead.
You don't want to look back on life and realize how much of it you wasted 'chasing women' and just dealing with the nonsense that is going on in this day and age. Make no mistakes about it, relationships should not be this much work. You shouldn't have to engage in all these mental gymnastics and constantly be watching your back, but because of the low moral character floating around these days, if you don't watch yourself, you're setting yourself up. When you come to the realization that it's not anything you're doing wrong, you just have to know that sometimes you just need to step out of the game. There is no point in playing a game in which you incur large risks, but you have little reward if you win.
You have to have an investor's mentality... Not necessarily in the aspect of investing your money, but more along the lines of investing ANYTHING. You only have a limited amount of time, so you should invest it in activities that bring a high level of return and remove those activities that are liabilities or bring a low level of return in your life. That is how you really start to get ahead.
You see, for a lot of guys my age who want to date somebody that’s our age – the game is kinda fukked up if we go by the “damaged goods” logic.
I think by the time a woman hits 30, she’s done a WHOLE lot in her life already (at least, in terms of experience with the opposite sex and relationships and thangs of that nature, did).
But to write them off because of their (possibly, not to use the term “ratchet” but eventful) history is kind of a tough subject. I know its easy for every to say, “Just forget ‘em – fukk ‘em and leave ‘em” ideology.
The gal I’m seeing now was in long term relationships, it’s just unfortunate that she didn’t choose the right men – everybody has to grow and experience things and learn from them.
Does that imply that she is a reformed “insert floozy type expletive here”?
Not everybody is going to live the pristine and untainted lifestyles our mothers lived.
But like I said, I know what’s going on and I am very cautious of how I treat these ladies and closely monitor their behaviors/actions, words and try to forecasts any dangers so that I don’t see myself descending into those same pitfalls that caused me ill-attitudes and bitterness. The game (and yes, it is a game and will ALWAYS be a game) is dependent on how you play it. You let a broad walk all over you and take advantage of your resources, energy and time? That’s all on you cuz you didn’t know how to navigate the trenches of relationship-dom.
Tact is something that we seldom yet specifically target on... and this following is relative to how you approach the shiits:
Travesties in a relationship occur if you allow them to!
Like most men that reach a certain age and can only share stories that come dully equipped with dilemmas, misfortunes, ordeals and blunt force trauma to the heart, I understand why they feel the way they do – it’s because they didn’t see or acknowledge the warning signs. The red flags were ALWAYS there – but what did they do about it?
Nothing! They allowed themselves to slip into the pitfall of pitiful partners.
As men, we have to lead women. If that means you have to strike with an iron fist – then SO BE IT!
The reason why women commit infractions such as infidelity, excess spending, questionable domestic habits or divorce, is directly correlated to some BYTCH SHIIT YOU DID OR ALLOWED TO HAPPEN IN THE RELATIONSHIP!
If she doesn’t respect you, if she doesn’t fear you, if she can’t follow your lead and overall, not happy with how you are handling shiit – OF COURSE SHE’S GONNA TAKE THE CHILDREN, MONEY, HOUSE AND WHIPS cuz of something THE MAN NEGLECTED TO TAKE CARE OF!
Most times out of ten, some where along the time you first met her until the time she left you – you made a miscalculation and (unknowingly) took a mindless step in the path of destruction...
and the sad this is that he ain’t even know it!...
he ain't even know it.
Edit: While i was composing this post, Sharp was thinking and basically, writing the same thing in nature as i am.
Good shiit breigh.
.
I disagree with the bolded. A woman is going to do whatever she feels like doing whenever she feels like doing it. It is all contingent on her feelings. If she likes you, then she will accept your leadership and will be pliable enough to start doing whatever you tell her, but once she loses that feeling, everything will change in an instant. Mike Tyson got broken in half by several women and there's not anyone that would have called him any kinds of punks. A woman will eventually do whatever is in her emotions to do and at most, your behavior can only curtail it or keep her from doing it while she's in your presence.
There were men who worked hard, took care of the kids, took care of all the household responsibilities and basically did what a man was supposed to do, but they got cheated on. The most that a lot of men hope for is that by creating some sort of emotional circus, that they can curtail her nature and keep her so wrought up on the emotional rollercoaster that she is in too much disarray to cheat. As for me personally, I don't believe any woman's company is worth the effort of playing these little games to keep her interested.
I'm not going to allow a woman to control my behavior by feeling that I need to cater to her emotions. "Well I'm not being cold enough, I need to stop calling her more than twice a week because she might get the feeling that I'm not mysterious enough." "I'm going to yell at her more because she might get the feeling that I'm being too soft." This is allowing a woman to control your mind and thus your actions, and there's nothing that a woman is offering that's worth me giving up control of my mind and behavior for.
As a man, I'm not responsible for her behavior. She is. Women wanted all of these equal rights, so they need to take equal responsibility for their actions. If a woman is taking a man's kids, is destroying him financially and is playing all of these little games, that's more of a reflection of her lack of character than it is on what he did.
Now, what I AM responsible for is my own life and thus educating myself about life and making choices that are ultimately beneficial for me. I am responsible for who I choose to let into my domain and whether they will continue to be able to be in my presence. I am not responsible for the actions of others, but I am responsible for whether or not I let them into my circle so that their behavior can even begin to affect me. The reason I'm very careful with the females that I choose to deal with is because I know they are very capable of the behavior we've all been talking about. What we as men need to do is be very careful about the women we ultimately decide to invest our time and efforts with and never view your company as something that is cheaply given.
You need to have an investor's mentality when dealing with women or with most things in life. I'm not talking about whether or not you are profiting financially off of a woman, but you need to think whether you are getting a suitable return for the time and effort you are investing with her? Is the effort you are putting in being justified by reasonable returns?
With investing in the stock market, you NEVER invest just to invest. You never buy stocks just because you haven't bought one in a long time. You only buy a stock if there's a suitable expectation of a reasonable return. It's the same thing with women. You never get with a woman 'just because'. You have to analyze her characteristics and determine whether or not she is bringing in value that is worthy of you making an investment of time with her. If not, that's one you pass on.
You have to start thinking in terms of is this woman someone that will help me in my future or is she someone that will hinder it? Do not grace those who will hinder your future with your company, but spend that time with those who will. If you can find none that will do, simply shift that extra allotment of time to another activity.
With investing in the stock market, you NEVER invest just to invest. You never buy stocks just because you haven't bought one in a long time. You only buy a stock if there's a suitable expectation of a reasonable return. It's the same thing with women. You never get with a woman 'just because'. You have to analyze her characteristics and determine whether or not she is bringing in value that is worthy of you making an investment of time with her. If not, that's one you pass on.
You have to start thinking in terms of is this woman someone that will help me in my future or is she someone that will hinder it? Do not grace those who will hinder your future with your company, but spend that time with those who will. If you can find none that will do, simply shift that extra allotment of time to another activity.
Scustin Trillberlake
Banned
.
CrossBones
Louder than words
one thing you have to notice about today is the large absence of traditional mothers and modest wives out there. the image of a woman who is willing to give up her forever21/sex-and-the-city/young girls attire in order to be a wholesome woman is becoming rare. Im not saying for women to turn into a jogging suit wearing housewife and get fat, but many woman today should not be portraying themselves as an avaliable, sexily attired, single woman when they go out. there is nothing wrong with a woman looking like shes taken, looking like shes somebodys mother, and like she is not out for attention. as men we have to support that from our women.
you wouldnt even know that many women are taken if you go by how they conduct themselves and what theyre wearing when they go out. it can fool almost anybody. (and the crazy part of all that is, thats the point.)
sexy, alluring attire for a committed woman should only be for when shes out with her man. sexy pics are only to be shown to her man. she should not be attempting to court attention from other men out there by being extra about her wardrobe, because that is a bad sign for your relationship. if a woman wants to be taken seriously, she has to reserve herself to some degree and only do all of that for you. she needs to be showing that she is for you by not putting herself all out on the market like that. or else, you guessed it, you share that girl. shes ready to bounce at the next offer instead of grinding it out with you.
now you and I know the difference between what a reserved, regular looking woman who dresses nicely looks like and what an "available" female who is out for fun and to meet somebody looks like. dont get it twisted.
all that mixed signals stuff you read about is just that. women want to be able to look like, act like, and be a slut without the repercussions. that freedom is fine, but you are going to be treated as what your uniform shows you to be. they can not be surprised when theyre taken for how theyve chosen to represent themselves.
any woman with an open behavior towards her sexuality and attire is basically her showing the world that she is ready to get down and wants some new dikk. a woman you are with may argue and say that that you dont "own" her so she can dress how she wants, but in other words, she isnt taking the relationship and your position as her man seriously. thus, she isnt your girl.
many women, whether single, single parent, or even in a current relationship, take it upon themselves to promote their sexuality as their top feature. consistently. they dont point out their home skills, motherly qualities, successes, or other characteristics, it all comes down to their sexuality. whenever you see them, they like to dress provocatively, post up sexy pictures on the internet, post attention whore comments, and court male attention as much as they can in person - then turn around and ask you NOT to consider them sluts. many of these same women tend to have kids outside of wedlock as well, which makes their predicament even worse. how do you think they even got that way?
a respectable demeanor, and a sense of modesty (personality wise as well) from a woman are virtues you want to look for. not to the extreme, but to a degree. if she is to have any real capacity in your life then she has to come correct with her presentation when shes out. thats not to say she must be unnattractive, and a mess, it just means that she is able to tone down her dress wear sexually, and limit her interactions with other men when shes not with you. what is it exactly that she could need from another man that she cant get from you, right?
if you want a serious relationship with a woman, than you need to see if she is not above toning down, looking like an indoor housewife on occassion, and sometimes being inside, regular, and chilling with you. think of tisha campbell's character on the show wife and kids (when she wasnt fat). she was dressing regular at the house. had nothing too bold or sexy when she went out by herself. she had a conservatism in much of her attire. she looked like and presented herself as more of a mom, since she was one. her kids can be proud of how she presented her body when she went outside. she could still dress feminine, but not sexy. and then when it was time, she dressed up and cleaned up nicely to look good for her husband. she wore bad ass dresses and could rock lingurie for her man.
(her attitude at times was something else though
Im not saying to get a double of her. Im saying, get you a woman who can manage to not look slutty and misrepresent herself when she goes out.)
go to 2:10 my brehs
[ame]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YEEpK_YVi6Q[/ame]
you need a woman who can wear those different hats. a woman who isnt obsessed with strictly looking hot 24/7. thats all just insecurity and a lack of growth on a womans part. she has other duties in a household and as a woman to be taken serious. she needs to show you that she can be all of that. ultimately, her sexiness should only be put on for you, and not to get men to look at her.
you wouldnt even know that many women are taken if you go by how they conduct themselves and what theyre wearing when they go out. it can fool almost anybody. (and the crazy part of all that is, thats the point.)
sexy, alluring attire for a committed woman should only be for when shes out with her man. sexy pics are only to be shown to her man. she should not be attempting to court attention from other men out there by being extra about her wardrobe, because that is a bad sign for your relationship. if a woman wants to be taken seriously, she has to reserve herself to some degree and only do all of that for you. she needs to be showing that she is for you by not putting herself all out on the market like that. or else, you guessed it, you share that girl. shes ready to bounce at the next offer instead of grinding it out with you.
now you and I know the difference between what a reserved, regular looking woman who dresses nicely looks like and what an "available" female who is out for fun and to meet somebody looks like. dont get it twisted.
all that mixed signals stuff you read about is just that. women want to be able to look like, act like, and be a slut without the repercussions. that freedom is fine, but you are going to be treated as what your uniform shows you to be. they can not be surprised when theyre taken for how theyve chosen to represent themselves.
any woman with an open behavior towards her sexuality and attire is basically her showing the world that she is ready to get down and wants some new dikk. a woman you are with may argue and say that that you dont "own" her so she can dress how she wants, but in other words, she isnt taking the relationship and your position as her man seriously. thus, she isnt your girl.
many women, whether single, single parent, or even in a current relationship, take it upon themselves to promote their sexuality as their top feature. consistently. they dont point out their home skills, motherly qualities, successes, or other characteristics, it all comes down to their sexuality. whenever you see them, they like to dress provocatively, post up sexy pictures on the internet, post attention whore comments, and court male attention as much as they can in person - then turn around and ask you NOT to consider them sluts. many of these same women tend to have kids outside of wedlock as well, which makes their predicament even worse. how do you think they even got that way?
a respectable demeanor, and a sense of modesty (personality wise as well) from a woman are virtues you want to look for. not to the extreme, but to a degree. if she is to have any real capacity in your life then she has to come correct with her presentation when shes out. thats not to say she must be unnattractive, and a mess, it just means that she is able to tone down her dress wear sexually, and limit her interactions with other men when shes not with you. what is it exactly that she could need from another man that she cant get from you, right?
if you want a serious relationship with a woman, than you need to see if she is not above toning down, looking like an indoor housewife on occassion, and sometimes being inside, regular, and chilling with you. think of tisha campbell's character on the show wife and kids (when she wasnt fat). she was dressing regular at the house. had nothing too bold or sexy when she went out by herself. she had a conservatism in much of her attire. she looked like and presented herself as more of a mom, since she was one. her kids can be proud of how she presented her body when she went outside. she could still dress feminine, but not sexy. and then when it was time, she dressed up and cleaned up nicely to look good for her husband. she wore bad ass dresses and could rock lingurie for her man.
(her attitude at times was something else though
Im not saying to get a double of her. Im saying, get you a woman who can manage to not look slutty and misrepresent herself when she goes out.)
go to 2:10 my brehs
[ame]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YEEpK_YVi6Q[/ame]
you need a woman who can wear those different hats. a woman who isnt obsessed with strictly looking hot 24/7. thats all just insecurity and a lack of growth on a womans part. she has other duties in a household and as a woman to be taken serious. she needs to show you that she can be all of that. ultimately, her sexiness should only be put on for you, and not to get men to look at her.
what's the max time y'all ask a girl out before you stop and dead her
basically i want out with this girl once, we had a good ass time, she enjoyed my company and she was even hitting me up first a few days after it. then i asked her out again she had some bs excuse, then a waited like a week and a half and ask her again and she gave some whack reason, she didn't suggest another time or something or later on in the day. right now i just plan on dropping her
basically i want out with this girl once, we had a good ass time, she enjoyed my company and she was even hitting me up first a few days after it. then i asked her out again she had some bs excuse, then a waited like a week and a half and ask her again and she gave some whack reason, she didn't suggest another time or something or later on in the day. right now i just plan on dropping her
Rocket Scientist
Superstar
put babygirl on waivers^ She is confused and immature.Alot of women are good actresses and will put up a front.However if she isnt making efforts to communicate,then to the bushes she goes.
u shoulda deaded it after the first time u asked her out.
dont curse her out either.
you: "lets hang out tomorrow"
her: i cant.
you:
her:
you:
1 week later
her: heey!!
you: hey
her: you forgot about me?
.......
Poh SIti Dawn
Staying Positive, Getting Better Everyday. Holler!
Today the first time I've met a chick and not asked for her number after being the first time meeting her. I think this will be a good thing in the long run bc we go to the same school.
why do you think it's a good thing ? maybe someone else got her phone number right after you met her and is gonna dikk her down next week