Essential Quick Lil Gems on Dealing with Women

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A female messaged me first on Okcupid, we messaged each other back and forth like 2 or 3 times.

I sent the last message and fukked around and made an irrational decision. Got in this horny, anxious ol "well she messaged me first" haze and sent her my number in the next message :sadcam:

Why are you stressed about that? She made first contact, you are both on a dating site so it is implied that you are both there to meet people. Giving your number in the first three messages is a good idea, if she is just there to chat and waste your time it's better to find that out sooner rather than later.
 

International Playa

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Fellas what do you think about ladies who are open about their dating history. This lady I'm talking to, when I asker her "have you ever dated a white/African/fat/broke guy etc. she is open and tells me how long or when they dated. The problem is the numbers are starting to get high. I act non judgmental and non-chalant about it, but in my mind I'm like WTF!!!!
 
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Why are you stressed about that? She made first contact, you are both on a dating site so it is implied that you are both there to meet people. Giving your number in the first three messages is a good idea, if she is just there to chat and waste your time it's better to find that out sooner rather than later.

You're right bro, you're totally right. I just got caught up in this skewed vision of "dating site etiquette". Was initially thinking that I should have waited for more messages before a number exchange, but establishing direction early is essential.

Thanks for the response, breh.
 

Turbulent

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@Turbulent

Last night, I randomly threw on the 5-17-2008 episode of the Black Phillip show -- I'm curious to hear your opinions/thoughts about Jeff..
sorry for the late reply man. Jeff is like a player a little bit. it's kinda like what they said on the show. medicine mixed with koolaid. he has his own frame and type of image he wants to put out and attracts a certain type of chick with that.
 
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Fellas what do you think about ladies who are open about their dating history. This lady I'm talking to, when I asker her "have you ever dated a white/African/fat/broke guy etc. she is open and tells me how long or when they dated. The problem is the numbers are starting to get high. I act non judgmental and non-chalant about it, but in my mind I'm like WTF!!!!

Is the number of people she's dated high? And what's your relationship with this woman? Do you have feelings for her?

I can appreciate honesty, or whatever may appear to be genuine honesty, on part of a female, but I would rather it be on the basis of question answering, rather than just bringing it up randomly.

Men and women alike have to embrace the fact that humans will have a history. We're presented with experiences, and we are all-encompassing individuals who are fully capable of getting lost in a moment. Discussing relationship/sexual history is pretty much an implicit practice, but I understand how there can be some unpleasant feelings. The mindset we've been peppered with growing up always arises when trying to acknowledge if a certain number of anything, or a certain way of handling something, is the "right or wrong way".

Can't view women as lesser beings, not saying that you're doing that, but I would suggest trying to imagine something you would do in regards to partnerships/relationships, and then think that the opposite sex is fully capable of doing those same things. Asides from a few anatomical differences, we're all similar.
 

MikelArteta

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Is the number of people she's dated high? And what's your relationship with this woman? Do you have feelings for her?

I can appreciate honesty, or whatever may appear to be genuine honesty, on part of a female, but I would rather it be on the basis of question answering, rather than just bringing it up randomly.

Men and women alike have to embrace the fact that humans will have a history. We're presented with experiences, and we are all-encompassing individuals who are fully capable of getting lost in a moment. Discussing relationship/sexual history is pretty much an implicit practice, but I understand how there can be some unpleasant feelings. The mindset we've been peppered with growing up always arises when trying to acknowledge if a certain number of anything, or a certain way of handling something, is the "right or wrong way".

Can't view women as lesser beings, not saying that you're doing that, but I would suggest trying to imagine something you would do in regards to partnerships/relationships, and then think that the opposite sex is fully capable of doing those same things. Asides from a few anatomical differences, we're all similar.

:wtf:

Sent from royalty using Tapatalk breh
 
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Is the number of people she's dated high? And what's your relationship with this woman? Do you have feelings for her?

I can appreciate honesty, or whatever may appear to be genuine honesty, on part of a female, but I would rather it be on the basis of question answering, rather than just bringing it up randomly.

Men and women alike have to embrace the fact that humans will have a history. We're presented with experiences, and we are all-encompassing individuals who are fully capable of getting lost in a moment. Discussing relationship/sexual history is pretty much an implicit practice, but I understand how there can be some unpleasant feelings. The mindset we've been peppered with growing up always arises when trying to acknowledge if a certain number of anything, or a certain way of handling something, is the "right or wrong way".

Can't view women as lesser beings, not saying that you're doing that, but I would suggest trying to imagine something you would do in regards to partnerships/relationships, and then think that the opposite sex is fully capable of doing those same things. Asides from a few anatomical differences, we're all similar.



:whoa:

I understand what you are saying, and i agree with the point that humans have similar social patterns. However, you need to read up on Hypergamy and Male disposability as soon as you possibly can. Men and women view relationships, very, very differently.
 
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:whoa:

I understand what you are saying, and i agree with the point that humans have similar social patterns. However, you need to read up on Hypergamy and Male disposability as soon as you possibly can. Men and women view relationships, very, very differently.

Good point, I agree. I apologize for that abstract statement. Men and women aren't wholly the same, but they share similar desires to an extent, but you're right. I jumped to a conclusion too soon without offering up more intricacies.
 

re'up

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for the bushes, it's not that they should all be thrown in the bushes. People are human. they'll either act right or fukk up (and the same goes for me). When i decide they have fukk up from my perspective, i throw them in the bushes until they make things right. some of them don't care and never make things right so they remain there forever. but it's just a way of saying, they're in the bushes until they're not. And they're out of the bushes until they are. but the bigger their fukk up is, the more they'll have to do to make things right. and i don't even say it like a powertrip thing for me. it's just a feeling that you get when you know they're really acting in good faith and you know things are right again. what's right or wrong for you totally depends on your code.


That's how I feel too, and I have to kinda thank the posters here and this site in general for some of that info, I've never been a simp, and I'm never one to chase a bytch, but I have the tendency to be romantic and genuine when I really like someone, but the kinda guidelines I got from this thread are what helps..not so much to make the decision, but to feel like I made the right one.

That girl didn't text me back for 24 hours, so what I think is that was an insincere, unthoughtful, response to me being upfront and genuine, so I won't text her again, not out of spite, but I see how she responded, and I'm not cool with that. And then, her clumsy attempt to flirt when she wanted something professionally wasn't appreciated either. It's an easy fix for her, she can hit me up and I'll still meet her, but much more aware, skeptical of her. I still am really attracted, but I won't put myself out there anymore with a text, call, whatever.
 

winb83

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A note for the nice guys or guys who been played by women, who are watching these thugs/badboy and thinking of copying their behaviour to acquire success with women. Leave that alone, learn to be a man,a man who doesn't tolerate disrespect and is confident. A good example of man Im talking about it is the character of James Bond

a man is a man because he has a penis. that's all it takes to be a man. honestly i wish people would stop idealizing everything.

really the cure to all this is to stop giving a fukk. stop trying. just be who you are and if people wanna be in your life and be around you cool and if they don't that's fine too because you're independent and ok riding solo.

its about unplugging yourself from society's value system that says an attractive woman is one of the most valuable things in this world when the cold hard truth is most of the women you encounter (hell most of the people regardless of sex) have very low character. good quality people with high character are incredibly rare. most people live their life putting themselves before anything and everything else. they're takers looking to get whatever they can however they can with the least amount or work required to get it.

these traits are pretty much beat into women who live in a society that tells them they are of high value because they are woman and they should be pampered, taken care or, and be happy just because they're themselves no being a good person or earning any of it required. society tells us as men its our job to take care of women. we are the providers. fukk that we're all grown and supposed to be equals you should be carrying your own weight not expecting somebody to drag yours for you.

what is success with women? fukking a lot of them? partaking of an activity that is for the purpose of procreation with a bunch of low character people running the risk of impregnating them or contracting one of their diseases? 18 years of child support and or battles for the power to direct our child's future?

as men we have failed ourselves because we don't demand more. we have been indoctrinated by society and enslaved by our biological desires letting that shyt govern our behavior instead of looking at these women and saying fukk your p*ssy if you can't bring real value to the table and make my life better there's the door get the hell out of my life. instead we put up with their shyt because we think it will get us in their vaginas and we think that's real value when its really an inherently self destructive act.

success with women is really nothing more than playing a game of Russian Roulette with your quality of life. the real goal should be finding a woman of high character that's worth being around.
 

sixsixtwo

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"So tell me. What is all the boyfriend and relationships fuzz about? What kind of solace do people get from the boyfriend thing, why do girls lust for having a boyfriend? they lust for the stability and emotional comfort of a man who will commit to them, even if it’s for a short while, but as soon as they get this comfort it gets overridden by something else. The boyfriend role – one that changes at any time at any moment according to the times and flavors…. what’s in it? what does it really mean.

Seems like there are two kinds of available women, the single ones and the “in a relationship” ones, with the single ones more craving for stability, and the “in a relationship” ones more craving and more wild for random cock. I have had better luck with girls with boyfriends than when I’ve been in the boyfriend role myself. Less work and more fun. And any trace of stability or nurturing companionship is taken away as soon as the girl is presented with a better option, even if that option is merely contextual and void of anything deeper, and not boyfriend material – or probably just because of that -. When I'm single and hitting on girls I'm usually that better option. When I'm in a relationship and taken off the pool, I have to fight and combat and keep and police all the stranger cock she seems so eager of.

Not worth the time. Not for me."
 

Poh SIti Dawn

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Girls actually expect you to text them a bunch before you can ask them to hangout. Did not know that shyt, god why would I wanna text you all day when I can see you and we can talk face to face.
 

kevm3

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a man is a man because he has a penis. that's all it takes to be a man. honestly i wish people would stop idealizing everything.

really the cure to all this is to stop giving a fukk. stop trying. just be who you are and if people wanna be in your life and be around you cool and if they don't that's fine too because you're independent and ok riding solo.

its about unplugging yourself from society's value system that says an attractive woman is one of the most valuable things in this world when the cold hard truth is most of the women you encounter (hell most of the people regardless of sex) have very low character. good quality people with high character are incredibly rare. most people live their life putting themselves before anything and everything else. they're takers looking to get whatever they can however they can with the least amount or work required to get it.

these traits are pretty much beat into women who live in a society that tells them they are of high value because they are woman and they should be pampered, taken care or, and be happy just because they're themselves no being a good person or earning any of it required. society tells us as men its our job to take care of women. we are the providers. fukk that we're all grown and supposed to be equals you should be carrying your own weight not expecting somebody to drag yours for you.

what is success with women? fukking a lot of them? partaking of an activity that is for the purpose of procreation with a bunch of low character people running the risk of impregnating them or contracting one of their diseases? 18 years of child support and or battles for the power to direct our child's future?

as men we have failed ourselves because we don't demand more. we have been indoctrinated by society and enslaved by our biological desires letting that shyt govern our behavior instead of looking at these women and saying fukk your p*ssy if you can't bring real value to the table and make my life better there's the door get the hell out of my life. instead we put up with their shyt because we think it will get us in their vaginas and we think that's real value when its really an inherently self destructive act.

success with women is really nothing more than playing a game of Russian Roulette with your quality of life. the real goal should be finding a woman of high character that's worth being around.

I'm going to have to disagree with the notion that all it takes to be a man is to have a penis. That's all it takes to be a male, but a man actually has qualifications. In tribal societies, they actually had rites of manhood, which were strenuous tests that one had to pass in order to be considered a man. Being a man is something that actually has to be qualified for. In a society without men, who actually have the ability to grab leadership positions by the reigns and handle business, society starts going downhill and fast.

I agree with the notion that we are indoctrinated to worship women. This is unfortunate, but is something that can be removed when you come to the realization on your own. Everyone will have their own definition of success with women. If you aren't about that player lifestyle, never let anyone push you into it... especially your homeboys. They might talk down on you or whatever, but they won't be the ones going half on that child support nor do they have an ability to remove an std from your body.
 

Poh SIti Dawn

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lol, cause i see all of them wearing headphones, big sunglasses etc. I don't know, keeping it real maybe it's a slight fear. but they just don't give me the desire to approach. i approach once in a blue moon though when i'm really feeling the chick and i feel like she's giving me a vibe. i'm just really not focused on approaching. Oddly enough, stranger girls actually approach me (also once in a blue moon). And i do the same thing as you, when i'm talking to a chick i usually don't chase (sometimes i do and it usually backfires on me) but when i don't, things just flow and they actually end up asking me for my number/facebook, and they pursue contacting me. You go after the ones who want to be in your cypher and it's a beautiful thing because she'll cooperate much more.

for the bushes, it's not that they should all be thrown in the bushes. People are human. they'll either act right or fukk up (and the same goes for me). When i decide they have fukk up from my perspective, i throw them in the bushes until they make things right. some of them don't care and never make things right so they remain there forever. but it's just a way of saying, they're in the bushes until they're not. And they're out of the bushes until they are. but the bigger their fukk up is, the more they'll have to do to make things right. and i don't even say it like a powertrip thing for me. it's just a feeling that you get when you know they're really acting in good faith and you know things are right again. what's right or wrong for you totally depends on your code.
That makes sense, it's either you're in the bushes or you've got a chance of being in there, but lets not hope for the worst.
Yeah man I've figured that this whole chasing thing is ass backwards. It's hard to say the right thing I think, especially through text. In fact I feel like texting is like a womans bulletproof vest, like they literally hide behind that shyt (most of them) because like many of them they're cowards like someone was saying earlier. That's pretty much the only way that they have the power to say "no" or do something slick or even say something slick.
Only the guys who apply what they learn which is a small percentage, majority of people will read but wont apply.

If you apply the knowledge we will definitely have an upper hand, you wont accept a female flaking on you, you wont jump through hoops to impress her, you wont accept her disrespect and check her for it. These are the qualities these women lust for in thugs/badboys. These thugs/badboys dont tolerate their BS and check them for it, but they also know how to give special treats to these women when they are behaving :inlove:

A note for the nice guys or guys who been played by women, who are watching these thugs/badboy and thinking of copying their behaviour to acquire success with women. Leave that alone, learn to be a man,a man who doesn't tolerate disrespect and is confident. A good example of man Im talking about it is the character of James Bond

Do you think so? Because I thought with thugs/badboys they just handicap women by playing mind games themselves by using jealousy and all that shyt in their favor, in fact I find it quite pitiful. They basically play games like women with women, if that makes any sense.

Yeah James Bond, Sidney Poitier, Robert De Niro characters, for black men Sidney Poitier's character in "In the Heat of the Night" is a good role for all black men to examine.
 
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