Girls either think I'm "too good to be true"
I know this is a vent post and you ain't really asking a question, but I've been in this state before, and I had to learn to
not relax. Hopefully the young guns and green horns can relate to what I'm saying.
* puts on Black Air Force 1's *
* sprays on some Tobacco Vanille *
2 Options for Too Good Too Be True/You Must be a Player.
There are little comebacks and responses you can say in the moment, but this is more holistic framework.
Option 1
If a chick is like this, but she's a chick that you want to keep around, not some scalawag that's keeping your bed warm - (because what I'm suggesting is WORK, and you don't do any work for broads that you don't care about)
Remind the chick that you are in fact dating down... subtlely.
- Never missing a work out.
- Never eating junk food.
- Pictures of your fine ass ex, (that she thinks you really loved) she might catch once in a while on your phone.
- Speak a word to female staff when you're out and about - make them light up.
- If you got kids, nephews, nieces, younger siblings, pets, interns, employees - etc - you tell them what to do with authority, and they better hop to it.
That "one foot out the door" lifestyle. White boys call it
dread. They go to far with that, so think of it as passive dread. You're not trying to take the chick to a spot where you done gotten with 2-3 of the regulars.....
You can NEVER verbalize that you are better than her.
Other people can, but you can never say such a thing.
You can only show her. And it's best that she just observes how OTHERS react.
And....You can't verbalize that she needs to step up or lose you.
You do need to make a habit of giving her requests, commands, guidance and direction - but MATTER OF FACTLY.
She needs to make the connection that her actions and demeanor are DIRECTLY related to how much attentio you give her. You just can't say it.
Your game becomes tangible (and fragile) when you break it down.
Let her see you work the magic, and then try to explain it to herself.
Make her question her own value.
Why is HE with ME?
Then, as a way to release some of the tension, give her a way to use her EFFORT to make up for her shortcomings.
She gotta put in work, she gotta invest. She has to "fight" for your relationship.
These chicks give far more of that "early in the relationship energy" to their bosses than they do to their boyfriends and husbands. Because the boss - keeps them in actual tension.
I wish we didn't have to go this route - but you can be BETTER than a chick - and she'll take you to the cleaners and take you for granted.
ASK ME HOW I KNOW....
She's not happy if she think she's on your level.
She's certainly not happy if she thinks she can do better than you.
She's only happy* when she thinks you're better than her, and she's going to lose you.
*happy - how the chick feels about you when she first meets you, sees that God is Real, and acts ACCORDINGLY. Full hair and make up to come over for Netflix and Chill type steez. Getting up to grab you a drink, AT YO HOUSE...
Incidentally - most regular guys get comfortable in a relationship, and only start doing stuff the chick wanted, when she's already mentally checked out of the relationship. The City Boy that took her for granted - some how has a better hold on her than random dude that took her for granted.
Happiness for many women - at least the behavior that we tend to identify in/associate with women that are happy with us - is
not what I would call man-style happiness, aka objective happiness.
As Patrice said, you can't make a woman happy. So Happy Wife, Happy Life - do what she says, give her all the power, is a recipe for disaster. (The guy that doesn't pay attention to her pleading is actually slightly better off than the one anticipates her every want and desire - neither of these guys do you want to be)
She is not content, by nature. She can't be happy.
E.G. 1 - See these broads at work. They show up at 9:12, and the outfit has changed by 1:30 pm.
- Type of chick that walks into the office in heels, but then switches up to sensible flats when she's actually on the floor. (these particular women disgust me, sorry it's a personal thing)
- Hair that was down is now up.
- She complaining about being cold, but got a Frappuccino in one hand, wearing a skirt, with sandals.
E.G. 2 - LipStick Alley - Any given time, all of them broads is miserable down to the sub-atomic level. They can't be happy for random celeb black woman without bringing in some negativity.
I disgrace...
If you play it even/straight up with a chick, if you try to make her feel secure by saying you're not a player, that you are not too good to be true - she will ease back into her nitpicky nature. And then she will find fault in her life, in you, in the relationship, whatever.
Some of them never fail to turn your kindness* to some sort of weakness.
*If she continues to appreciate your kindness, that's a keeper in my experience.
So remember,
Your answer to her insecurity, is not to relieve the burden, but to keep her in tension.
That's option 1.
Option 2 - DGAF - and if she acts up - DROP HER IMMEDIATELY.
Option 2 is simple, no need to do all this Jedi Mind Player stuff.
Just be in a position that you can chunk the deuce.
Looking good, money coming in, your own place, your own car, and your own circle of friends that you maintain. ...
When you're young and trying to keep these chicks around, the chess games is how most men operate. When you're seasoned - your peace is paramount, and letting a chick twist in the wind is much better than trying to fix something
