Essential Quick Lil Gems on Dealing with Women

[winb83]

A women once told me i was stupid for caring about another man kids, His the kicker she was talkin about her own kids breh smh. I was with her about two almost three years. She wasnt my first girlfriend but the first women i was ever in love and in a serious relationship with, and it was a bad experience that i had to go through for it to be my first love that left me with emotionaly scars and a bad out look on women.She was one of them Agressive females with alot of anger and pain that she kept inside from her last relationship with her baby father.To keep the story short he always cheated on her, She caught the nikka with hickies on his neck,they use to physically fight,She came home with her oldest daughter and mother one time and caught the nikka in bed sleep with another bytch and there was way worse shyt and best believe breh's i had to pay for all the shyt this nikka did to her physically and verbally.

I tried my best to be there for her whenever she needed me.I was there when she need a shoulder to cry on, When she was into with her fam and they wouldnt say a word to her,i was there when they had deaths in the family and alot of shyt i held her down through alot brehs. I remember back in 09 a nikka that was messin withher b4 she met me was callin her phone talkin mad shyt, The nikka even bought up the fact how he killed somebody for the first time and wasnt scared to bust his gun..until that day breh i never said a word or met this nikka a day in my life and come to find out they was working togetha and the nikka was on some stalker shyt with her and the bytch dint even tell me until a month later after she got fired smh.

With her being my first love i was a major simp for her.It was times when i cried for her like a little bytch over the phone, Let her talk down on me and disrespect me past boundaries. Whenever she dint get her way,She would tell me to go kill myself,She would tell me how she wish she never met me or wish she never fell in love with me, Its been times she even told me she was gone f*ck dudes who i had problems with in the streets after they kill me... And when i did have it in me to leave she would come to me crying and pleading me to stay..And it wasnt her fault brehs, i was the dumb one ,i was the one who stayed after so much direspect for the (simp)le facted i love her and i thought she love me.. I was still in HS when i first met her and she was 24.. So yea i was young and dumb and her being my first love dint make it any better.

I loved her kids and her mom and family loved me,Her kids father wasnt really there, He called here and there but that was it. I had a close bond with those kids.Her oldesr one made me a pic with crayons and ask me would i be her daddy... That shyt broke my heart when she told me i was stupid for caring for another man kids..

We ended up breaking up a few yrs back in oct and she endup pregnant with another dude baby that next month and best believe when i found out that shyt destroyed me smh..she 29 now and has four kids, she had three when i met her.She seem like she grew up a bit.She tried to get back with me last month and got pissed that i rejected her, She finally see that i was a good dude after all and in the end that i really loved her.she always tell me how i sorry she was for treating me like, and i forgive, Because the blame game will keep you in the past.


Im young nikka, Im turning 20 this year brehs and i look foward to enjoying my youth/ The moral of the story is breh, Dont be a simp like i was. No matter how much you loved them always keep your self repsect and if she cant repesct you and treat you how you wanna be treated then fukk her..Cause its plenty of fish in the sea and there all pretty.I look back at that realtionship and feell so stupid and a shame of myself on how i let somebody treat me like that. but iearned from it and im better man today, This thread helped me alot and change my out look on womne, Hope it did the same for yall..T.I Said Get to know her b4 you love her


Sorry for the typos breh its 3:26 am and im tired

You can't fix broken people. Don't even try because you'll only break yourself in the process. I'm sorry you had to learn that the hard way.

 

[Turbulent]

Now I can't say that I'm a religious man at all. It's just not me but let me get into Jesus freak mode for a bit...

Have you ever noticed that it's always the flabby and sick (former hoes/single moms/spinsters) ones who go hard in the paint for Jesus when they've ruined their life?

Jesus is perfect, alright...He's the perfect nice guy that every woman wants after she's over the hill. The ultimate beta. Think about that for a second.

After she's used up and her p*ssy is no longer a draw, she has nothing to offer but she wants a man who:

Will love her for her...
Provide in times of need and want...
Who won't fukk her and chuck her...
Who won't judge her past...
Who will tell her she is beautiful/amazing despite reality showing otherwise...

Jesus provides all that and then some. Plus she doesn't have to see him at all and technically, she gets her "provider/backup guy". It's the perfect setup.

Despite his perfection, Jesus is not someone who you should learn "manhood" from, fellas. Everything he did, although noble and for a higher purpose, was beta/simping/textbook nice guy moves. Also, that martyrdom complex didn't help. Aside from the time he went ham and screamed on those dudes in the temple, he wasn't alpha at all. But this is what the church pumps up as the path to follow.

And sadly, many boys are indoctrinated in "nice guy" Jesus who caught far too many L's instead of God (who never simped and constantly laid down the law on these females). Notice how big Easter and Christmas are in America? Two days celebrating the birth and re-birth of the "perfect nice guy". These are the major Christian holidays that we celebrate. We don't celebrate God's creation of the world or the time that he unleashed that flood that wiped the Earth's population but showed enough mercy to let us start over again.

If you trying to deal with these women out here, you have to retrain yourself from being like Jesus to being like God himself. Whatever God did, do it. The Bible laid the groundwork on how men are supposed to act in an dominant alpha way.

When God said something and it wasn't followed...he came down on them hard. That person was either cut off, cursed, killed or whatever but God made sure he was his word was followed.
When God gave a person something and it wasn't appreciated...he took it from them and let them suffer. They usually ended up coming back and begging for mercy.
God was so consistent that it ensured loyalty. He removed himself from Job and Job still stood by him because he knew God wouldn't forsake him (like he did before his trials and tribulations).

The playbook has been there all along yet your pastors and your female relatives never focus on that part. It's always about humility, mercy, forgiveness and all the nice guy stuff that Jesus was perfect at. That's fine for getting through life but it's not manly at all. Women love it because it absolves them from their own personal failures. My last post about the farmer and the snake pretty much boils down to a man who shows mercy and forgiveness is bound to get fukked over. This is what they drill in men constantly.

And preachers wonder why men don't deal with church. The shyt they put out now goes against a man's interest in every way. In the end, God never compromised who he was in any given situation. No exceptions, no mercy. And neither should you.

TL;DR: The church is a breeding ground for simps and suckers because of what they teach and focus on. However, you can remedy this by approaching situations as God would approach them...not Jesus.

that's one of the reason i feel a weird vibe at a lot of churches. it's mostly women and men dragged by their women at a lot of churches. Not all churches, don't get me wrong.

as far as Jesus, i don't see him as a simp cause he sacrificed himself for the world out of principle. most men sacrifice themselves to women out of hope they get something in return. that's the most important distinction. When Jesus died on the cross, he didn't hope that people would believe in God and thank him for his sacrifice. he just said "I'm gonna die on this cross for all of your sins. Whether you accept my teachings and my blood for your sins is on you...". Jesus' whole demeanor was alpha too when you think about it. He just did what he did and you either followed him or you didn't. He didn't plead with people. He was a nice guy but it was genuine. no ulterior motives. that's what we sinners (and the hoes that we are talking about) are attracted to. the concept of someone who is nice to us and accepts us but not to play us in the long game.

same thing he did with whores. I talked about this earlier in the thread but when Jesus saved the woman who was about to get stoned, he didn't do it for her to be loyal to him or to get something in return. he just did it to teach her something. He told her to go and stop sinning. did she continue sinning? who really knows. but it's on her.

If you're nice to people in hopes of getting something in return (sex, loyalty, a promotion, etc) then you're an ass-kisser and no one respects an ass kisser. You should only be nice if it's part of your principles. You shouldn't care about what you'll get in return because it's never guaranteed. your return is what you feel in your gut after the fact.

never expect loyalty. once you do something it's done. Three words i try to use less because i'm finding the concept sorta "idealistic" are "loyalty", "deserve", and "owing". once you do something, there's no guarantee that people will react a certain way. you can trust in them but sometimes it's not even their fault. They could die the next day and then what? If you did it because you expected a certain reaction from them, you lost. Had you done it for your own conscience and for your own principle, without expecting material or loyalty in return, then even if they die the next day, you already won.

 

[kbtwofour]

you already know the girl?

Her cousin invited me to come out for dinner and drinks last week. I met her last week and her cousin has been trying to hook us up since then. My friend gave me her number after her cousin said it was okay. We have been texting every day since then. We made plans to hang out and go on a date when I come back into town.

A potential problem is we work at the same hospital. Our hospital is big enough that you only really know the people who you work with and you might recognize a few people outside your unit. She works in the unit with the most gossip and drama.

I made the mistake two years in a row of messing around with people from work. I don't want to make the same mistake because everyone knows your business.

 

[Turbulent]

Her cousin invited me to come out for dinner and drinks last week. I met her last week and her cousin has been trying to hook us up since then. My friend gave me her number after her cousin said it was okay. We have been texting every day since then. We made plans to hang out and go on a date when I come back into town.

A potential problem is we work at the same hospital. Our hospital is big enough that you only really know the people who you work with and you might recognize a few people outside your unit. She works in the unit with the most gossip and drama.

I made the mistake two years in a row of messing around with people from work. I don't want to make the same mistake because everyone knows your business.

sounds like your gut is already giving you a bad feeling about this. That's because subconsciously, it knows something.

 

[kbtwofour]

sounds like your gut is already giving you a bad feeling about this. That's because subconsciously, it knows something.

It really has nothing to do with her because I know if at some point we get serious I will just quit.

I already know some of her co-workers and they like me. I just don't want anyone trying to mess up our relationship. She works with some bitter and jealous women in her unit.

I am willing to take the chance because she is someone I could see being in a long term relationship with.

 

[Turbulent]

It really has nothing to do with her because I know if at some point we get serious I will just quit.

you'd quit your job over a girl if it's getting more serious but would she quit her job for you if it got more serious? why would this be required from your end?

She works with some bitter and jealous women in her unit.

is this based on what you have observed or is it based on stuff she has told you?

I am willing to take the chance because she is someone I could see being in a long term relationship with.

if you've already made up your mind then all the best

 

[kbtwofour]

you'd quit your job over a girl if it's getting more serious but would she quit her job for you if it got more serious? why would this be required from your end?

It's different because I am less than 2 years away from graduting with a CS degree. I am doing a career change so my co-workers understand that I will be quitting within the next two years.

is this based on what you have observed or is it based on stuff she has told you?

Observed with my eyes. She works mornings and I work evenings. In her unit the evening nurses are completely different than the morning nurses. The morning nurses are bitter, jealous, and insecure.

if you've already made up your mind then all the best

fukk it... I might as well try and see what happens.

 

[Dreamzeedream]

Damn, you was messin with a chick 10 years older than you when you were 14? Technically, her ass shoulda been in jail.

lol naw breh i wasnt 14 when i met her i lied to her an told her i was older .later on when shyt got deeper she ended up founding out.shyt i guess that was my karma for trying to be grown

 

[Dreamzeedream]

You can't fix broken people. Don't even try because you'll only break yourself in the process. I'm sorry you had to learn that the hard way.

thank breh,i just wish i knew that back then

 

[kevm3]

that's one of the reason i feel a weird vibe at a lot of churches. it's mostly women and men dragged by their women at a lot of churches. Not all churches, don't get me wrong.

as far as Jesus, i don't see him as a simp cause he sacrificed himself for the world out of principle. most men sacrifice themselves to women out of hope they get something in return. that's the most important distinction. When Jesus died on the cross, he didn't hope that people would believe in God and thank him for his sacrifice. he just said "I'm gonna die on this cross for all of your sins. Whether you accept my teachings and my blood for your sins is on you...". Jesus' whole demeanor was alpha too when you think about it. He just did what he did and you either followed him or you didn't. He didn't plead with people. He was a nice guy but it was genuine. no ulterior motives. that's what we sinners (and the hoes that we are talking about) are attracted to. the concept of someone who is nice to us and accepts us but not to play us in the long game.

same thing he did with whores. I talked about this earlier in the thread but when Jesus saved the woman who was about to get stoned, he didn't do it for her to be loyal to him or to get something in return. he just did it to teach her something. He told her to go and stop sinning. did she continue sinning? who really knows. but it's on her.

If you're nice to people in hopes of getting something in return (sex, loyalty, a promotion, etc) then you're an ass-kisser and no one respects an ass kisser. You should only be nice if it's part of your principles. You shouldn't care about what you'll get in return because it's never guaranteed. your return is what you feel in your gut after the fact.

never expect loyalty. once you do something it's done. Three words i try to use less because i'm finding the concept sorta "idealistic" are "loyalty", "deserve", and "owing". once you do something, there's no guarantee that people will react a certain way. you can trust in them but sometimes it's not even their fault. They could die the next day and then what? If you did it because you expected a certain reaction from them, you lost. Had you done it for your own conscience and for your own principle, without expecting material or loyalty in return, then even if they die the next day, you already won.

I agree. If you're going to be generous and good person, then the only way to truly do it is out of no expectation for reward. Otherwise, you're not good, you're merely haggling. People think Jesus was soft, but when he drove the money lenders out of the temple showed that when things got too disrespectful, he was willing to handle things. Another real thing is when Jesus says not everyone that says Lord, Lord, I will let into Heaven. That correlates with the whole the church is the bride thing. It reminds me of women who, when they are in your presence, they are sweet and do everything right, but as soon as you leave, they act like you don't exist. Jesus is pretty much telling us, if I don't exist to you when I'm not around, you're not going to exist to me when I come back. Even in the case of the adulterer he spared, he said go and sin no more lest something worse happen to you. His response to the disloyalty of Judas? It was better that he was never born.

John 15: 13
King James Bible (Cambridge Ed.)
Greater love hath no man than this, that a man lay down his life for his friends.

Jesus was all about loyalty, sacrifice, mercy and forgiveness, but if you crossed a certain line, you would face repercussions like the Pharisees or Judas. What people have to understand is what repentance is. Jesus had forgiveness to those who truly repented, not those who said sorry and then went back to doing the same thing. It means to completely turn away from your old ways.

The problem with church a lot of days is that they are teaching watered down religion and catering it to the women. Doesn't the Bible say for women to be quiet and stay in submission and have no authority over men and not to teach them, and yet how many female pastors do you see? How often do you see the pastor stand up and tell women to be submissive to their husbands? How often do you see women quoting and trying to teach the Bible on facebook? That should be the man's job.

Tyler Perry is now even considered a "Christian", but they allow him to put on plays and movies with him crossdressing and there are even rumors of him being homosexual. I would say there is a great distinction between what the modern Church is and what Jesus represented.

When it comes down to it, you can cater to women and be angry and wrathful... but if you have to do that, do you really want a woman around? What has to be understood about God in the old testament is that his wrath came after continued disobedience. There was forgiveness, but when they continually disrespected God, He let his anger out on them.

To me, I'd prefer to be like Jesus, in forgiving transgressions as long as they turn from their ways, but there are certain transgressions in which I will cut a woman from my presence, such as disloyalty. I will forgive her, but she can no longer be in my midst. If she has a little anger or attitude problem here and there and apologizes, that I can forgive and be with her, but if she cheats, she is out the door. I will forgive her, but me and her can no longer exist on that relationship level.

Ultimately, I find holding on to anger and wrath is detrimental to you and you shouldn't let anyone steal your joy. Life has a way of handling those who choose to be disloyal and snakish in their behavior.

 

[Dreamzeedream]

That's what a trip it is. A lot of us all had stories of us 'being there' and holding a woman down through her struggles and yet she didn't show an iota of appreciation. All she did was go talk to another man. Women don't really appreciate loyalty or being there for them in their time of struggles nearly to the extent that a man does. It's a blessing you learned this lesson early before you allowed 'being there' for a woman to get you into even hotter water. The only time these broads will appreciate a man 'being there' for them is when they get flabby and start looking for someone to rearrange their lives when they fell off... and the sad thing is, even then, once she got you locked in, she will go right back to messing with other dudes.

On the kids part, it's tough, because as men, we have a lot of pity and compassion on kids... but we know being how women are, it would be crazy now to date women with kids.

When a woman says, "Where have all the nice guys gone," she really means where are all the victims who will put up with my burdens, be my emotional sponge and who will compensate me financially while I mess with exciting dudes on the side.

It was a real tough lesson you learned bruh, but great thing you learned it before you got in way too deep. Real talk, women don't appreciate men who are 'there for them.' They appreciate men who they feel are better to them and that they can look up to.

she always played the victim role in everything she even did that shyt to her family an they always gave a bs excuse for her behavior . just like i fell in love with her i fell in love with her kids,dont take on that responsibility if you aint ready. the only reason she tried come back is because she found out dude was cheating on her an he ended up getting locked up. she was looking for that simp but he died along time ago.you was on point breh

 

[sixsixtwo]

LifeSiteNews Mobile | Young men giving up on marriage: ‘Women aren’t women anymore’

 

[rapdonttweet]

all you really know about another person is what they allow you to see. the chick you fukking could have done anything before she met you and could be any type of person. every man that ever gets cheated on, used, and abused by a woman was arrogant enough to think he had it all figured out before she did it to him. people wear different mask around different people. i'm pretty sure when you're chilling with your boys your behavior differs from when you're visiting your parents. in fact your close friends and parents probably know different sides to who you are because you only expose certain aspects of yourself to certain people. there are also other aspects you probably don't display to anyone.

For me dating itself is the opportunity to break through all those fronts people put up. And if I'm in a serious relationship I'm already cool with her friends and family and I've seen how she interacts with them. I've taken all the steps I need to judge her character.

i don't aspire to posses any woman or get into any serious relationships. to me the whole concepts of "my girlfriend" "my wife" "our relationship" are possessive. a relationship is nothing more than an attempt to exclusively possess another human being.

Of course you do. You've already admitted you go through a chick's phone. If you didn't aspire to be attached to a women, you wouldn't be going about that obsessive behavior. For men who have no strings attached, what's on her phone never even crosses their mind. Men who want a healthy relationship might wonder what's on the phone, but maintain enough space to private life. Men who are obsessed are the ones who look through that phone, trying to figure out every personal detail.

you never really know what another human being is capable of. i'm a person that openly admits this most people don't want to so they preach about trust and observe the behavior of their partner and decide to trust them. the thing is in this world your partner can compartmentalize many or all of their bad behavior and purposely keep it away from you. many a man marries a woman he trust completely and also has no idea of what she's really doing behind his back.

Many of these guys don't know how to judge character and don't know how to communicate with their partner in an effective manner. How many of these guys are marrying for "love" instead of truly trying to get to know their woman and all her quirks and flaws?

The reason I think I'm better than these guys is because I used to be one of them. Its like an adult looking at a kid who thinks he knows everything and laughing.

define decent character when all you really know about another person is what they expose you to. you don't really know another person's character and if they set out to deceive you about it they have a high probability of success. sure over the long term the probability goes down an unforeseen circumstances and happenings change what you see but by that point this person could have fraud you into a relationship, child, or marriage.

Even you don't believe that. If you did you would be living on an island somewhere, with no friends, no family ties, and relying on yourself. Every day you rely on people just by living in society. What kind of world would it be if I couldn't trust my friends, the girl I choose to have a relationship with, or my own family? Might as well be a hermit at that point.

I also want to point out that defrauding me would be a complete waste of a ratchet female's time. She'd have to fabricate a good character, fabricate a career and future goals (which if she were ratchet she likely wouldn't have). She'd have to keep me away from her friends and family. All this while keeping up her act of being a great woman. I'm a very good judge of character, so this would be very hard to do if not impossible. And during this entire process which would take years, there would be no tricking and she wouldn't be reaping any benefits aside from being with a great guy (which a ratchet female won't appreciate right?). All this for a middle class salary, which she would already have on her own? Yeah, this is the last scenario I'm worried about happening.

it should be common sense to you but nobody opens the door when they know the shooter is waiting for them on the other side. saying a person has good character is something said in hindsight if things work out. the thing is you have to take the risk and your ability to minimize that risk is very small.

I don't even know what you're saying here. You're trying to equate dating to opening a door to someone outside trying to murder you?

I already laid out the steps I take to avoid the wrong kind of females in my last post. Its worked for me. Nothing's guaranteed in life, but its still pretty damn safe. If those odds aren't good enough for you, then stay away from females I guess and let the rest of us eat.

 

[Po pimp]

lol naw breh i wasnt 14 when i met her i lied to her an told her i was older .later on when shyt got deeper she ended up founding out.shyt i guess that was my karma for trying to be grown

I'm guessing the bold is a typo. So let me get this straight. You MET her when you were about 14 but things got more serious down the line?

 

[Dreamzeedream]

I'm guessing the bold is a typo. So let me get this straight. You MET her when you were about 14 but things got more serious down the line?

Breh I use my ps3 to write that but listen.I was 15 going on 16 when I met her fam,when I met her I told her I was 18 about
to be 19.I was young dumb dude that dint know shyt and was trying to be
grown. 3 weeks after meeting each other I said
she was my first love and we all know how that go.But she ended up finding out how old I really was about 9 months into the relationship