i think your first mistake was trying to debate the quality of superhero movies with a bunch 20 something men when you almost 50. this movie don't have meryl strepe in it, what are you doing here?
nah that's rude, my real gripe is as follows;
Some people are 'toxic' yes. but most just don't like all the sappyness and empowerment because it gets in the way of the action. Keep mind the same people you calling out for this probably love them some Ripley from Aliens, or Sarah Conner in Terminator. It's not about being against empowerment, its about being entertained.
I had the same critique about some spike lee movies even though i agree with his messages. sometimes he'll stall a whole sequence just to hammer a message into your brain. will literally have the actors stop and address the camera/audience directly in the middle of film like
nikka i get it, continue the movie please! Doesn't mean i'm against the message. just more interested in watching a fun film.