i got about 15 different random thoughts lmao:
grown ass men still tryna cop cheap feels?
and then got the nerve to try to preach to me to justify his hellish ways
i was gonna go on a liquid diet this weekend to see what would happen. im not tryna lose weight, just wanna see what would happen. but white girl want me to come visit her ass. damn, friends are like kids, always fukking shyt up
you ever not like your friend's parents? like i genuinely do not like my baby j's mom. her mom had the nerve to say, i wanted her to bring somebody when we went out because the dude im fukking with would start flirting with her if it was just me, her and him. and im like bytch (1) doey is not the jealous type. i give no fukks if he start flirting with her (2) i dont fukk with people that will disrespect me like that, but i have to have feelings to feel im even getting disrespected (3) j is gorgeous, but dont put so much stock into your daughter that she could steal a man away from me, or i could steal one from her (4) get your insecure bullshyt out of here. i wish you had that much confidence in yourself and maybe your husband and father of your kids wouldnt have a mistress that every fukkin body knows about. shyt, i told j her momma could have him! maybe she'll know how a man supposed to treat you. and on top of that, her momma is two faced! i just dont wanna be around shorty
j: you wanna come over for my sister birthday
me: shyt, i gotta work
j: you aint got no job man!
i dont like blueberries, but from past experience, blueberry waffles are the shyt!
i was gonna go to bww to get some fried pickles. but my twin said im too grown to go there for my birthday
so she suggested dmk burger bar which is fukking hipster heaven, my food wasnt that good, the fried pickles were more at bww, and the pickles were cut into spears and not chips! they had this whiskey drink with cider and damn was that some of the most delicious shyt i ever had in my life
on a related note, so much for not drinking.
i've gotten better tho, no deathly hangovers.
texting a friend
me: preciate it. handshake
friend: you're welcome. handshake accepted
lmfao
i said that shyt to my nephew, he actually tried to shake my hand. i had to tell him "move around buddy, this is a figurative thing"
fukking with somebody in chicago is waaaay different from fukking with somebody in springfield. (a) they gon wanna see my house (b) they gon wanna meet my friends
(c) they gon wanna meet my family
oh hell naw! (d) they gon want me to meet they friends and family
(e) my mother is eventually gonna wanna know who im fukking with that i wont let come in the house
im sure theres more, but i got that shyt off my chest