BK The Great
Veteran
I don’t drink every day, let alone every month. Don’t even smoke. That’s a once in a while thing for me. A Sober mind is clarity to me.
Sometimes we do stupid things for love. Even if we know we shouldn't. We can't help who we love unfortunatelyNah not me, she didn't answer the phone in July and I pulled up and knocked on her window at 3am
She was surprisingly happy that I stopped the no contact and showed up, still dumbest thing I ever did. I was ready for war if a man was there
Glad that relationship is over even tho I miss her, we just enabled eachother to be stupid as fukk
That's a lot to unpack. I appreciate the fact that you can share that and kinda get it off of your chest. Don't let them "spirits" get you breh. Neither one of them are good. Find your peace brehI'm not dapping you because I approve of your method for coping, but rather... for sharing that personal bit of info.
This time last year, i was dealing with extreme achy breaky heart, but I didn't divert to drugs/liq, attached it head on and took the pain (because quite frankly, funds were running low, so i didn't have loot to spare for recreational vices).
People almost always never know how good they've got it until it's gone.
Man, I gave that broad I had and more. Only to get it proverbially thrown back at my facials. Ugh! So upsets.
I mean i knowed that we were going through rough patches, but the final finger nail in the coffin was that one time where we were face timing, and I noticed that the picture I took with her was no longer on her night stand.
Do you know what it's like to have a dagger to the heart with no blood pouring out? But the tears from your eyes are so intense that it doesn't matter, because you're already swimming in your sorrows.
Gawt damn ya man, hov.
The crazy thing is that I've cut off all contact with that heartless wench (Yeezy taught me a lot of things, but he didnt' tell me not to mess with Armenian women until it was too late; oversized boot wearing a$$hole), but every few months, she'll call.
But i never pick up.
I just stare at my phone screen and the picture of me kissing her pops up and i simpy reminisce over her (I despise her to hell, but I still love her, if that makes scents).
*sighs*
To be a thug in love.
It's never easy.
But understanding such is what separates the men from the mice, the pits from the poodles...
The captains... from the crunch.
Back to the topic at palm,
After a 6 week bout with sobriety (although not by choice, because I had Delcron 3030), i'll be going back to drinking again this weekend.
it was good while it lasted.
But i need to connect with my dark seid and fight some demons, and the only way I can gain access/summon them is through alcohol. Now you know why they call it "spirits".
.
keep at it. Wait until you hit that 3rd monthThis post is right on time for me. I've been "taking a break" from drinking since early this month, and:
1. I don't miss alcohol at all. I get intense sugar cravings sometimes, but that's it.
2. My body and mind obviously feel way better.
3. I broke my long ass plateau I was on with my weight loss.
I don't think I want to go back. I drank A LOT in my early adult life, so it doesn't really do much for me now, anyway.
Although that may sound deprecating af to some, these are some true words.I'm gonna die anyway who gives a fukk.