My kid is bytchy and moody like her mother...what can I do as a dad?

[Kornball The Conqueror]

suffer

 

[FcKuPaYmE]

Choose better brehs

 

[skyrunner1]

See if you can get her in programs or activities. Do you have any sisters or cousins who can maybe connect with her for a different positive feminine perspective? You have to put her in something that will help her grow maybe open up and express herself. I have seen this before and usually its because they know the parents neglect them and they only have tv or social media with no further investment than bare minimum like school. Maybe she has social issues at school and no other outlets to make friends.

Do you go to church? Dance, Swimming? Something to help her develop and grow positive self esteem and self worth. Hope this gives you a different way of looking at things and maybe see some blind spots.

 

[3rdWorld]

You must remove her from that environment somehow and surround her with alive people before it's too late..perhaps travel with her far and wide to places she may find interesting.

 

[murksiderock]

11

Well we definitely used to argue quite a bit (me and my ex) but it's stopped for like 2 years now since covid had us separate by force. Also, yes her behavior is pretty immature and bad at home. she walks over her mom everyday. My kid is Ike and my ex is Tina and my ex is enabling the abuse for sure.

My kid just likes to eat and sit at home lol just to be blunt. Definitely a couch potato kid with attitude.

Her mom is similar. She works and basically sits at home except to occasionally visit a relative or go grocery shopping

I used to be like that till I startedt tryin to take my health more serious and alittle more active outdoors for physical and mental health

You have to try to meet her at her level, to raise her from it. And believe me, I know how difficult it may be, but she's your daughter, it's your obligation to try...

I have three daughters (5, 3, 9 months) with two different women, so I haven't hit this stage of personality or development yet. I think the first thing I'd start with is getting across to her the importance of respecting her mother, and trying to find out why she feels comfortable going at her mom. I'd also go really hard in trying to learn what she's interested in, because it isn't a good sign being a couch potato at 11, what is she going to be in 10 or 20 years?

Could be a sign that she's depressed and again I think that's your obligation to figure it out...

Therapy to me is a last resort unless there's been some trauma. I think otherwise you exhaust all options to get thru to your child, the alternative to just rushing to therapy is your child may take that as a signal that something is wrong with them and that when they are bothered you make them someone else's problems rather than going hard yourself...

Look, parenting is hard. There is no perfect playbook, but based on what you've said, I can't help but think you have plenty of opportunity to do more. Much love to you, g!

 

[Indigo-1]

Start taking shyt away.

You dont get to go out with me and have an attitude, my Dad always taught me that. Let her know you let her stay home even when you want to go out so she has to work with you too. Old generation wasn't putting up with that sh1t, better fix your face/attitude. She sounds spoiled, Love is a 2 way street & she has to learn that early.

 

[L@CaT]

Best thing you can do for your daughter is be there for her and just kick ass in life. Your Kids will eventually see the great example you are and follow your lead

 

[Thegospel]

Just hold your L and hope she is ready to listen when she gets 18.

 

[Geek Nasty]

Only model #dogset is worried about is this new 6 series, keep struggling with your broke ass whiskers

 

[Mrhateeverything]

Could just be genetics and you can’t really change it .
One of my daughters is the same , just like her mom and she doesn’t even know her mom . My daughter irks me like crazy because of it but not much I can do about it

Personalities typically don’t just change

 

[Concerned Citizen]

Was the child planned? Were you married to her mother? Does the mother resent you for any reason? Did you try and bring your child into the world in the most ideal environment that you could make?

Asking the above because if the answers are no then honestly your daughter’s behavior should be expected. Plus she’s an 11 year old girl so if the answers are yes then she could still be moody af right now due to hormones alone.

For real though why have a kid with a woman who you wouldn’t want the kid to emulate but will be one of the biggest influences (nature and nurture) in the kid life?

 

[seabreeze80]

depression

 

[DreadBrown]

I like how you added that

It really is tiresome and depressing because I really have an out to just leave this situation. Im not physically in the house and I could just walk away from it all but my mind won't let me at night. I feel like I always left something behind that I have to comeback and save

Please don’t do that my bro

she sound like a normal preteen you just gonna have to ride it out

Nothing you can do about her picking up her mother’s traits but you could try building up her emotional intelligence to balance out the moodiness

 

[Spence]

You’re going to have to take time to find out what she likes to do at this stage in her life then apply it to a daddy daughter activity either inside or outside the home.

 

[CarmelBarbie]

You call your 11 year old bytchy breh?
Has she got her period yet? If she has, that’s probably partially contributing—hormones. I was a brat as a preteen and teen. She’s a tween. My friends with daughters in that age range, deal with the attitude, moodiness, “nothing is cool if it involves mom or dad” attitude too. I don’t see anything that stands out about what you said. I didn’t want to go anywhere either when I was 11, I didn’t want to do family activities and I wanted to be left alone. This is normal. I don’t see why everyone is concerned in this thread lol—this is common at that age.