They said being in the military was causing depression and that I would be okay if I got out
They said being in the military was causing depression and that I would be okay if I got out
Beerus
Banned
Do yall Army nikkas make fun of the navy?
In The Canadian army we do
I mean
Seamen
Master seamen
BWHAHHAHAH
but for all my nikkas up in here what yall be using to have a clean shave?
I was using an electronic razor with some tea tee oil but I stopped and got a beard shyt during my infantry course this summer.
I'm thinking of getting a permanent one but if I do I will not be able to be deployed apparently, I'm in the Reserves.
and since I finished my course If I go to sleep like at midnight or 1 or 2 I always wake up around 5-6.
What the fukk
In The Canadian army we do
I mean
Seamen
Master seamen
BWHAHHAHAHbut for all my nikkas up in here what yall be using to have a clean shave?
I was using an electronic razor with some tea tee oil but I stopped and got a beard shyt during my infantry course this summer.
I'm thinking of getting a permanent one but if I do I will not be able to be deployed apparently, I'm in the Reserves.
and since I finished my course If I go to sleep like at midnight or 1 or 2 I always wake up around 5-6.
What the fukk
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I used to shyt on the air force every chance I gotDo yall Army nikkas make fun of the navy?
In The Canadian army we do
I mean
Seamen
Master seamen
but for all my nikkas up in here what yall be using to have a clean shave?
I was using an electronic razor with some tea tee oil but I stopped and got a beard shyt during my infantry course this summer.
I'm thinking of getting a permanent one but if I do I will not be able to be deployed apparently, I'm in the Reserves.
and since I finished my course If I go to sleep like at midnight or 1 or 2 I always wake up around 5-6.
What the fukk
my recruiter was the one who got me started on it too. I was hoping to go AF instead at first. This dude tho I only even went to the Army office because the AF place was closed."Hey what's up... I was trying to get in touch with the AF. Its real important, but they never seem to pick up the phone when shyt is going on"
"Tell me about it
"Dude had the thousand yard stare of a lifetime
He told me that I sounded like him back in Iraq asking for air support but yeah, get that permanent no-shave if you can. just to be safe. i use electric myself but its always best to be on the safe side.
SouthSac916
All Star
In boot camp we had a guy that had hemorrhoids. Before his appointments he would shave his ass with a razor in sink 2 or 3. Idk why some never got the idea " hey this one has ass hair in" cut every morning they lined up for the same sink he'd shave his a$$hole in
Farrinto
Who's the best MCs? Biggie, Jay-Z, and Nas
I went to basic at Fort Benning 
This is like the second weekend of being there and the drill sergeants decide to take us to the shoppette. We're still in the "mass punishment" phase so we were still getting fukked with heavy by the drill sergeants. Anyway, the drill sergeants are lurking around making sure no one buys contraband. I get to the register and I start putting up my stuff to buy one by one. I finally get to the last item and I see a tiny box. I had the 
look because in my mind I was saying "What's this? 
I didn't put this in here." I finally read what it was: birth control. Literally as soon as I saw it, all of a sudden I'm swarmed. "Private, why are you buying female products?!" "Did you lie to us, are you really a male?"
I tried to explain myself, I said "I didn't put this.." 
and before I could finish, one yells "Stand at parade rest when talking to a fukking NCO!" It was embarrassing as fukk, even the cashiers were 
. Mind you, Benning is all-male, so it was the perfect time to pull that shyt. I was still confused as to what happened when my battle said to me "They set you up, bro." and then it made perfect sense what happened. What made it worse is when I made it outside and they were inspecting what we bought, I had gotten some cherry Chapstick (I only got it because it was the cheapest one I could find, I didn't even pay any mind to the flavor) and it only added to the fukkery. I tried to explain that it was the cheapest one but it was no use at that point. Not a good day for me, lol.
This is like the second weekend of being there and the drill sergeants decide to take us to the shoppette. We're still in the "mass punishment" phase so we were still getting fukked with heavy by the drill sergeants. Anyway, the drill sergeants are lurking around making sure no one buys contraband. I get to the register and I start putting up my stuff to buy one by one. I finally get to the last item and I see a tiny box. I had the look because in my mind I was saying "What's this? I didn't put this in here." I finally read what it was: birth control. Literally as soon as I saw it, all of a sudden I'm swarmed. "Private, why are you buying female products?!" "Did you lie to us, are you really a male?" I tried to explain myself, I said "I didn't put this.." and before I could finish, one yells "Stand at parade rest when talking to a fukking NCO!" It was embarrassing as fukk, even the cashiers were . Mind you, Benning is all-male, so it was the perfect time to pull that shyt. I was still confused as to what happened when my battle said to me "They set you up, bro." and then it made perfect sense what happened. What made it worse is when I made it outside and they were inspecting what we bought, I had gotten some cherry Chapstick (I only got it because it was the cheapest one I could find, I didn't even pay any mind to the flavor) and it only added to the fukkery. I tried to explain that it was the cheapest one but it was no use at that point. Not a good day for me, lol.
Loop Ba$eCrawler
All Star
They did that same type of shyt to us in the Air Force. Before we got our heads shaved the instructors would walk around asking nicely about peoples hair. If you responded confidently at all they all swarmed and started shouting you down for an eternity before immediately going back to nice mode and talking to somebody else....Other than that the first day was the funniest cause I thought it happened to everybody until I told other people after basic and they said "Nah, we didn't have to do all that gay shyt"...Basically, we got to San Antonio late around 10/11pm on the buses. They separated everybody while screaming on us and then bused us to our dorms. They made us walk in in single file lines and stand in front of a locker. Once the dorm was filled the Instructor walked in and told everybody to strip butt naked. There were two sides to the dorms but both sides were open bays so were all in single lines with out backs to the lockers and basically looking directly at the guy across from our locker. So we're all standing there butt naked and trying to not to make eye contact while the instructor just slowly walks back and forth up the aisles. After like a minute or two he finally yells at the first row to go in a single file line to the showers and finish in 5 minutes. Luckily I was like the 3rd person in the first line so the gayness only lasted a short while. Somebody near the end of my line took too long in the shower though so he got screamed at for awhile...So I'm sitting on my cot organizing my shyt while the screaming's going on and there's still the second row standing there butt ass naked not saying anything. He finally came out and told them to line up for the shower....I can't imagine how bad the 3rd/4th rows had it cause they had to stand there looking at each other for at least 15 minutes. But nobody else I met after that said they had to go through the same thing....
PhonZhi
Veteran
I had my 1st wet dream while in basic
Loop Ba$eCrawler
All Star
I didnt think that was possible. We thought they were putting salt peter in the water to kill boners cause nobody was getting morning wood until the last 2 weeks.I had my 1st wet dream while in basic
Loop Ba$eCrawler
All Star
That instructor ended up getting removed from his position later for saying something racist to one of the black dudes in my dorm....Surprised me cause that dude was laid back and never confrontational about anything. The instructor really must've been a closeted racist gay dude....Worked out though cause as he was facing punishment for the racist stuff he basically let us have base freedom for the last 2 weeks. Went to 2 Spurs games in my blues and snuck down to the floor in one of em...This was back in 99 and it was the Spurs vs Laker/Blazers. 2 Incredible matchups that I missed most of cause I was busy walking around in my blues talking to chicks and trying to sneak onto the floor.
I had my 1st wet dream while in basic
Wrong thread?
This one kid used to talk in his sleep all the fukking time. This one night he was having a conversation with his moms...
"Shut the fukk up mom!!!!!!"
"bytch, keep it discreet!!!!"
"Shut the fukk up mom!!!!!!"
"bytch, keep it discreet!!!!"
General Mills
More often than not I tend to take that L.
Navy Bootcamp. I remember a few funny things. One of course was the swimming test. I damn near drowned.
Another was we had to stand watch in the barracks at night. You basically had to rove around the building checking rooms and shyt and write in the log after each pass. Boring work. I was standing the 4-8 watch. Its around 2am and everybody is knocked out of course. . .
Well so I thought.
I am walking past the bunks
When I see something moving furiously. . . . I walk up and this cac is daddy longstroking himself ( no homo ) with no covers on or nothing.
I say loud as fukk. "
Are you serious right now!??!?! He jumps up and falls out his rack. ( he was on a top bunk ) People around are starting to stir and ask wtf is going on. Just so happened my rack was right next to this one. Nobody should be in there of course. . Wellll. A shadow jumps out of the rack and GRABS MY SHOULDERS!
I yelled out YIPE!!! like a bytch.
It was our RDC (Recruit Division Coordinator) He was following me while I was on watch and slipped into my rack and was waiting to see if I would notice him. 
He yells out! " YOU JUST KILLED YOUR WHOLE COMPANY SHIPWRECK!!!!!
Wakes everyone up and lights are flicked on. . Then he noticed ol Stroker Ace sitting on the floor dikk hard with no draws on. 
I damn near drowned.Another was we had to stand watch in the barracks at night. You basically had to rove around the building checking rooms and shyt and write in the log after each pass. Boring work. I was standing the 4-8 watch. Its around 2am and everybody is knocked out of course. . .
Well so I thought.
I am walking past the bunks
When I see something moving furiously. . . . I walk up and this cac is daddy longstroking himself ( no homo ) with no covers on or nothing.
I say loud as fukk. "
Are you serious right now!??!?! He jumps up and falls out his rack. ( he was on a top bunk ) People around are starting to stir and ask wtf is going on. Just so happened my rack was right next to this one. Nobody should be in there of course. . Wellll. A shadow jumps out of the rack and GRABS MY SHOULDERS! I yelled out YIPE!!! like a bytch.
It was our RDC (Recruit Division Coordinator) He was following me while I was on watch and slipped into my rack and was waiting to see if I would notice him. He yells out! " YOU JUST KILLED YOUR WHOLE COMPANY SHIPWRECK!!!!!
Wakes everyone up and lights are flicked on. . Then he noticed ol Stroker Ace sitting on the floor dikk hard with no draws on.
Farrinto
Who's the best MCs? Biggie, Jay-Z, and Nas
This one kid used to talk in his sleep all the fukking time. This one night he was having a conversation with his moms...
"Shut the fukk up mom!!!!!!"
"bytch, keep it discreet!!!!"
The same shyt used to happen to me all the time when I would pull fireguard.
Navy Bootcamp. I remember a few funny things. One of course was the swimming test.
Another was we had to stand watch in the barracks at night. You basically had to rove around the building checking rooms and shyt and write in the log after each pass. Boring work. I was standing the 4-8 watch. Its around 2am and everybody is knocked out of course. . .
Well so I thought.
When I see something moving furiously. . . . I walk up and this cac is daddy longstroking himself ( no homo ) with no covers on or nothing.
I say loud as fukk. "
I yelled out YIPE!!! like a bytch.
He yells out! " YOU JUST KILLED YOUR WHOLE COMPANY SHIPWRECK!!!!!
We had this African dude that just couldn't pass the swim test.
My prob was the dead man float. No normal human is supposed to hold their breath that long.
