MILITARY STORIES

[Dave24]

I'm trolling?

Which one of us is a certified vet (VFW nikka) and which one of us is the civilian still telling coli about joining? (And has been for years. .)

I followed you on here and hit up your DMs asking dumbass rookie questions? Nah you did that.

My ass was too outta shape to even take a practice ASVAB? Nah, my recruiter knew I was sharp so I didn't even hafta take a pre-test. And I qualified for every AFSC in the AF off rip, bytch. :umdad:

My ass was asking other dudes if they could pull p*ssy offa enlisting as a dude with anxiety issues? Naw, that was you play-dohboy.


Oh, negged back on rc fat fukk. This the only salute you ever finna get.

You are a gutless coward and loser. Go back to the gym and lift your weights you puny fukk. You are a nobody and a failure, i dont want any salute from losers. And you have done nothing but attack me you condescding jackass. I dont need or want any advice from your punk ass. I may be a fat fukk but i will always be better than you.

 

[42 Monks]

we all know he ain't turning the corner and would be relieved with a pleasant surprise at best. let that man live the life he chose

 

[The Solid One]

I'm trolling?

Which one of us is a certified vet (VFW nikka) and which one of us is the civilian still telling coli about joining? (And has been for years. .)

I followed you on here and hit up your DMs asking dumbass rookie questions? Nah you did that.

My ass was too outta shape to even take a practice ASVAB? Nah, my recruiter knew I was sharp so I didn't even hafta take a pre-test. And I qualified for every AFSC in the AF off rip, bytch. :umdad:

My ass was asking other dudes if they could pull p*ssy offa enlisting as a dude with anxiety issues? Naw, that was you play-dohboy.


Oh, negged back on rc fat fukk. This the only salute you ever finna get.

 

[Son Goku]

Get mad when nikkas try to hold you accountable, future medhold brehs.

 

[Son Goku]

You are a gutless coward and loser. Go back to the gym and lift your weights you puny fukk. You are a nobody and a failure, i dont want any salute from losers. And you have done nothing but attack me you condescding jackass. I dont need or want any advice from your punk ass. I may be a fat fukk but i will always be better than you.

You big mad (i.e. fat and mad).

Call a nikka in shape enough to pass an AF PFT (but still stronger than you'll ever be) puny, fat b*stard brehs.
@ The bolded, your track record treadmill record says otherwise.

Imma "loser" that's done shyt you'll never do or even be able to do, and we not talking gym shyt. Accept it, and move on.


Brb still ain't been to MEPs.
Brb still ain't never said the oath, word to Green Lanterns.
Brb aint never worn the uniform (you'd wear maternity sizes).
Brb still stack less paper and get less hoes than me (a fukking broke nikka outchea tryna clown somebody lol).
Brb you'll never get that 214 or that (white) common access card. (That was a BMT joke you didn't get.)

fukk all the way outta here tryna talk shyt when you was weasling in DMs like a dry dikk nikka asking for help.

Front all you want in this thread, but I remember them dumbass questions you was asking, ole Courage the Cowardly Dog-ass nikka. "Is basic training hard? What is tech school like? Will I be able to pull girls? What the hoes look like?"


Keep fukking up so you can get aired out like laundry crew.

Told you then and I'll say it again now, this life was never for you. Now go eat some pizza from work and get the fukk on.

 

[Son Goku]

Whats your current height and weight?

A lot of people in this thread were getting on me for not taking the asvab yet.

My recruiter won't let me take any practice asvabs until i get my weight down. Also mentioned i can only take the official one at meps.

I dont know why people think i have the ability to take the asvab now considering what my recruiter outlined. All i can do is work and study with the asvab books i am going through. I have been studying and working through them everyday.

In terms of my weight i am at 240 lbs now, i weighed 250 pounds when i started this thread. I have been running and jogging every other day. I alternate between sprint days and long distance/endurance running. On the days i am not running/jogging i am working on push ups and sit ups.

Yeah there is only one recruiter in my area. The recruiter said i need to be at 186 pounds to join the air force based on my height. To take the asvab in his office if i can get to 200 lbs i will be allowed to take the practice asvab.

Based on AF entry requirements, dude is 5'9" (max) and was weighing in at 240 pounds at the time of the above posts.

 

[semicko82]

You big mad (i.e. fat and mad).

Call a nikka in shape enough to pass an AF PFT (but still stronger than you'll ever be) puny, fat b*stard brehs.
@ The bolded, your track record treadmill record says otherwise.

Imma "loser" that's done shyt you'll never do or even be able to do, and we not talking gym shyt. Accept it, and move on.


Brb still ain't been to MEPs.
Brb still ain't never said the oath, word to Green Lanterns.
Brb aint never worn the uniform (you'd wear maternity sizes).
Brb still stack less paper and get less hoes than me (a fukking broke nikka outchea tryna clown somebody lol).
Brb you'll never get that 214 or that (white) common access card. (That was a BMT joke you didn't get.)

fukk all the way outta here tryna talk shyt when you was weasling in DMs like a dry dikk nikka asking for help.

Front all you want in this thread, but I remember them dumbass questions you was asking, ole Courage the Cowardly Dog-ass nikka. "Is basic training hard? What is tech school like? Will I be able to pull girls? What the hoes look like?"


Keep fukking up so you can get aired out like laundry crew.

Told you then and I'll say it again now, this life was never for you. Now go eat some pizza from work and get the fukk on.

 

[patscorpio]

man i did not see the last page of this thread...man

 

[Sonic Boom of the South]

I put that @Dave24 dude on ignore

Buddy damm near 40 and has been making thread for like 4 years talking about he enlisting and asking advice


nikka ain't even salvation army worthy

 

[Son Goku]

nikka ain't even salvation army worthy

 

[Son Goku]

I met an instructor over at the sensor op course over at Randolph.

The shyt them dudes be doing, it's like calling in killstreaks in Call of Duty.

 

[Marc Spector]

You big mad (i.e. fat and mad).

Call a nikka in shape enough to pass an AF PFT (but still stronger than you'll ever be) puny, fat b*stard brehs.
@ The bolded, your track record treadmill record says otherwise.

Imma "loser" that's done shyt you'll never do or even be able to do, and we not talking gym shyt. Accept it, and move on.


Brb still ain't been to MEPs.
Brb still ain't never said the oath, word to Green Lanterns.
Brb aint never worn the uniform (you'd wear maternity sizes).
Brb still stack less paper and get less hoes than me (a fukking broke nikka outchea tryna clown somebody lol).
Brb you'll never get that 214 or that (white) common access card. (That was a BMT joke you didn't get.)

fukk all the way outta here tryna talk shyt when you was weasling in DMs like a dry dikk nikka asking for help.

Front all you want in this thread, but I remember them dumbass questions you was asking, ole Courage the Cowardly Dog-ass nikka. "Is basic training hard? What is tech school like? Will I be able to pull girls? What the hoes look like?"


Keep fukking up so you can get aired out like laundry crew.

Told you then and I'll say it again now, this life was never for you. Now go eat some pizza from work and get the fukk on.

ONE WHITE COMMON ACCESS CARD

sorry had the ptsd from BMT kick in

 

[Son Goku]

ONE WHITE COMMON ACCESS CARD

sorry had the ptsd from BMT kick in

Verifying one white common access card...a real one verified.

 

[theworldismine13]

subs

 

[Skooby]

This thread that got me thinking: https://www.thecoli.com/threads/fall-20-000-feet-and-die-brehs.837630/

My father injured his knee in a jump. Ended up getting partial disability when he retired because of it.

Did any of you have to parachute? Have you ever seen anybody get injured or even die in an parachuting accident?

I'm pretty sure y'all parachutes have backups, right?