Marriage rates are collapsing for lower income and middle income families

[1LurkerChick9]

It’s delusions. They hate any implication that they might be just as fukked as the “hoes” they keep encountering.

There's a lack of honesty

One minute we're all whores because we have so many options and simps are everywhere, the next we cant find men because we aren't good enough,ha

Men are for sure more marriage averse these days but I can't think of one woman ,including myself ,who hasn't had an ex boyfriend that wanted to marry them.

 

[Eddy Gordo]

By the same man, 90% of the times.

You did not see too many Black women with 10 kids by 6 & 7 baby daddies 50 years ago.

I'm calling bullshyt.

Now, I've got women in my family who had a husband who they had kids with, then he died and she got remarried and had more kids.

But just 6,7,8,9 kids from hoeing around?

You'll rarely find that before the '70s & '80s in our community.

Which is strange, because there's never been more birth control options to prevent exactly that from happening.



There's a lot of truth in this.

Men (especially Black men) don't want to hear that a lot of the armor that women (especially Black women) have put up is due to watching their mothers, grandmothers, aunties, etc. . .get dogged out, cheated on, and beat on for years.

Of course those women are gonna grow up viewing marriage as something they could take or leave

And we as Black men have to also question all that "playa" shyt that goes back to the '70s and how it helped to drive a wedge between Black men & women in our community.

nikkaz wanna blame Hip-Hop for everything, but all that "Superfly" "Goldie" shyt probably inspired just as much fukkery.

Again I ask. Why were women picking/ and still picking these guys if they so bad.

Either they don't realize its dysfunctional ( which is hard to believe)

Or they like the dysfunction and their place in it. That's not on the men that's on the women. Hell men care more about protecting women than women do.

Ray rice punched a woman and men formed like voltron and torched his career.

Chris brown was whopping Rihanna's ass and r Kelley got caught on tape pissing on girl. Who kept they careers alive, women. A lot of chicks like danger and dysfunction. Which is their choice. But I'm not gonna hold black men at large responsible for women's choices when there was probably a better option present.

 

[Coli Bot]

I think this is a big factor. Our moms married our dads who may not have been the most attractive, didn’t last long enough in bed, and that weren’t xyz. Those things matter more to women now, who now make more, and feel that they have more choices to exercise than their mothers did.

It was also easier for men who had less education, and made less income to support families. Our parents didnt need as much to buy homes, pay for colleges, etc, and also met in traditional settings not in the disposable dating culture where everyone is pickier, have less offline personal interactions, more financial burdens, and debts and other shyt to worry about that make them too anxious and depressed when they compare their lives to those stunting on social media. Our culture/society right now is in a strange place and will continue to escalate through the 2020 decade, as depression rates continue to increase, sexual perversions become even more twisted. A lot of men and women aren’t shyt—many can’t help it because we’re products of this society tbAf isn’t shyt either. I believe we’ll go from the current online easily disposable dating shallow clout culture—mixed in with incel shyt—to just abandoning it all due to the challenges in finding a quality partner. I think virtual relationships will be the next step.

But as the tides are turning, and more and more things that used to be accessible to the common man are now becoming luxuries afforded to the upper class, that will be a luxury for the upper class too. I think this is honestly all by design.

I wish I was born a decade earlier, not even because of this issue either, I just feel as if we’re truly at the end of days status. I’m in a cynical mood.

Great post. You broke it down nicely.

 

[CodeBlaMeVi]

This but I feel it’s the enemy putting stuff in my head about this sole woman I want to be in a relationship with in the future. Definitely not right now. She says she just don’t want to be in a relationship and wanna focus on getting her money right. Well, who says you can’t do that in a relationship? A relationship worth it’s weight in gold would support and nurture that. I prayed on and God told me she is the one but not right now. Patience is definitely a weakness I’m combating. I never been truly battle tested in regards to a woman.

To the brehs who quoted me:

I have to put some things in perspective. When we went on our first date almost a year ago; I was in a relationship that I confessed about on our date.

She currently lives in another city. We’ve been on and off for the better of this courtship. I recently just broke up with another woman a few weeks ago and we just started talking again. We were just on the phone with each other for over 2 hours. I think I’m giving off an impression like I’ve been hounding this one woman for 6 months to a year and she’s giving me the run around. If anything, I keep resetting on us growing into what we are meant to be because I’m impatient and can’t chill. She’s moving back home so we’ll definitely be able to spend more time together then. I hope I cleared that up.

 

[CodeBlaMeVi]

I think this is a big factor. Our moms married our dads who may not have been the most attractive, didn’t last long enough in bed, and that weren’t xyz. Those things matter more to women now, who now make more, and feel that they have more choices to exercise than their mothers did.

It was also easier for men who had less education, and made less income to support families. Our parents didnt need as much to buy homes, pay for colleges, etc, and also met in traditional settings not in the disposable dating culture where everyone is pickier, have less offline personal interactions, more financial burdens, and debts and other shyt to worry about that make them too anxious and depressed when they compare their lives to those stunting on social media. Our culture/society right now is in a strange place and will continue to escalate through the 2020 decade, as depression rates continue to increase, sexual perversions become even more twisted. A lot of men and women aren’t shyt—many can’t help it because we’re products of this society tbAf isn’t shyt either. I believe we’ll go from the current online easily disposable dating shallow clout culture—mixed in with incel shyt—to just abandoning it all due to the challenges in finding a quality partner. I think virtual relationships will be the next step.

But as the tides are turning, and more and more things that used to be accessible to the common man are now becoming luxuries afforded to the upper class, that will be a luxury for the upper class too. I think this is honestly all by design.

I wish I was born a decade earlier, not even because of this issue either, I just feel as if we’re truly at the end of days status. I’m in a cynical mood.

Snapped with this one, brehette.

 

[™BlackPearl The Empress™]

no the fukk im not. Im just being realistic on modern conditions and relationship/family dynamics. Unlike the lot of you nikkas relying solely on marriage stats in regards to blacks in relationships.

@bolded I wont ignore alot wont make it, but "vast majority" you know this how? there's no stat to compare them. All you can do in this regard is going off anecdotal evidence in this regard Just like you try to refute my claim with your anecdotal experience of how it not works.

There are stats to back it up. Plenty actually. Just because I didn't post them. Doesn't mean they don't exist. The world doesn't revolve around this conversation.

I love how you get to state your opinion and be "right" about what is "really" going on but now I need hard evidence to prove you wrong. You obviously have never even taken the time to research the subject but now I'm supposed to do it for you.

Nah breh you will keep that willful ignorance messing with me. I gave up on people who talk more than they try or have a lot to say but don't know what their talking about.

If you care go look them up. If not stay giving the thumbs up to BDs & BMs. I really doesn't matter what you believe. I has nothing to do with the truth.

 

[™BlackPearl The Empress™]

Men complaining about most women lacking quality as if most of them aren’t 99.9% aint shyt themselves.

For a good woman, marriage is a liability b/c even if she was dumb enuff to follow up bro babble and choose up on the ugliest, lamest, clit shriveling dude she could find regardless of compatibility or genuine attraction...even those dudes wanna play games and fancy themselves “playas”.

Plenty of regular degular dudes mess over good women and cheat on them just like other dudes.

The typical bullshyt marriage package that a lot of dudes wanna pitch (I.e. he makes the rules, but split the bills 50/50, while u do all the domestic chores, and don’t complain about anything, even him disrespecting you by cheating on you, while also expecting unwavering loyalty) is a no-go. The only reason women did that shyt was a result of centuries of forced arranged marriages, brainwashing, shaming, and lack of economic options.

Women want long-term companionship but they not willing to sacrifice autonomy, sexual satisfaction, attraction, love and happiness to get it. Anymore.

Marriage has been de-incentivized for women. Offering dikk and HOH babble and shaming tactics just ain’t enough to make a chick wanna chase a dude who makes her clit hide, to put up with him cheating on her and basically be his roommate. AND deal with wack strokes. FOEHVA!

Birth control wasn’t the harbinger of this shyt. Increased educational and economic opportunities for women was. If chicks can do better they will do better, whether it’s with a dude or not.

#Gospel

 

[HARLEM AL]

You expect men to pay 100% of the bills, despite you working a full time job?

Lmaoo right

Side note:
Good women are already married. They got their man in college or at a young age.

 

[HARLEM AL]

By the same man, 90% of the times.

You did not see too many Black women with 10 kids by 6 & 7 baby daddies 50 years ago.

I'm calling bullshyt.

Now, I've got women in my family who had a husband who they had kids with, then he died and she got remarried and had more kids.

But just 6,7,8,9 kids from hoeing around?

You'll rarely find that before the '70s & '80s in our community.

Which is strange, because there's never been more birth control options to prevent exactly that from happening.



There's a lot of truth in this.

Men (especially Black men) don't want to hear that a lot of the armor that women (especially Black women) have put up is due to watching their mothers, grandmothers, aunties, etc. . .get dogged out, cheated on, and beat on for years.

Of course those women are gonna grow up viewing marriage as something they could take or leave

And we as Black men have to also question all that "playa" shyt that goes back to the '70s and how it helped to drive a wedge between Black men & women in our community.

nikkaz wanna blame Hip-Hop for everything, but all that "Superfly" "Goldie" shyt probably inspired just as much fukkery.

get this the fukk out of here. Black women have been in charge of the families for years. Their mothers, aunts, grandmothers did whatever the fukk they wanted. They fukked the nikka they knew were not going to be good fathers because those men made their p*ssy wet. They didn’t want the productive man because he would hold their feet to the fire. Any man worth a damn wants structure in his house. And the black women didn’t want that. They wanted to continue to have dysfunction in their homes and to use the white man’s welfare.

And if the man put their hands on them the would surely call the cops on them to get them locked the fukk up. But shyt never mind that, fukk you think that hot water was on the stove for? Wasn’t for tea nikka lol.

 

[How Sway?]

Men complaining about most women lacking quality as if most of them aren’t 99.9% aint shyt themselves.

For a good woman, marriage is a liability b/c even if she was dumb enuff to follow up bro babble and choose up on the ugliest, lamest, clit shriveling dude she could find regardless of compatibility or genuine attraction...even those dudes wanna play games and fancy themselves “playas”.

Plenty of regular degular dudes mess over good women and cheat on them just like other dudes.

The typical bullshyt marriage package that a lot of dudes wanna pitch (I.e. he makes the rules, but split the bills 50/50, while u do all the domestic chores, and don’t complain about anything, even him disrespecting you by cheating on you, while also expecting unwavering loyalty) is a no-go. The only reason women did that shyt was a result of centuries of forced arranged marriages, brainwashing, shaming, and lack of economic options.

Women want long-term companionship but they not willing to sacrifice autonomy, sexual satisfaction, attraction, love and happiness to get it. Anymore.

Marriage has been de-incentivized for women. Offering dikk and HOH babble and shaming tactics just ain’t enough to make a chick wanna chase a dude who makes her clit hide, to put up with him cheating on her and basically be his roommate. AND deal with wack strokes. FOEHVA!

Birth control wasn’t the harbinger of this shyt. Increased educational and economic opportunities for women was. If chicks can do better they will do better, whether it’s with a dude or not.

Why are soman women complaining about men "not acting like real men" these days?

 

[Spectre]

It's sad that good men are literally saying dating is tough now and marriage is looking questionable for the future. But they don't wanna hear it.

They wanna keep pointing to ain't shyt nikkas from their past like its our fault. Like because he fukked u over, now there's no good guy out there? Making up psychos scenario marriages about abuse and cheating like that shyt is the norm ...miss me with that bs. There's lots of good guys that are fine with one good woman.

Fam a good educated successful breh was a good thing. It meant u were eligible. Dating would be easy. Equal yoke and all that. Now it's a whole different story.

Even the good women saying they got options so no more settling like their moms did. So u going after the clown with 5 kids? The nikka with the roster? Make it make sense

They said chase the money the women will follow. Some of us finally got the bag but it's like damn this is what we picking from now?

There is a huge gap in our community. Great black men and women but for some reason we're not seeing each other.....why is that?

 

[⠝⠕⠏⠑]

Miss me. You was out here throwing up bullshyt about a bunch of hypothetical ain't shyt dudes most yall never been with to justify not playing what you perceive as a lesser position in a relationship.

Which is cool. Your entitled to that position.

Ignoring the fact that the women chose those ain't shyt dudes.
And women with the ability today still choosing up on sorry, lousy, reprobate men.(Angela Simmons, ciara)

Added to the fact that all your really doing is demotivating the men. Especially the young ones. Which is just gonna fukk up the rest of society like it fukked up black America.

Yall cant see how that strong independent shyt directly correlates to what bw aren't getting compared to other races of women. i.e. colorism, black men having a lack of value in the black women, the massive amount of unproductive black men.

All that emotional vitriol over simple truth won’t change reality. You talking shyt about men being “demotivated”Tons of women BEEN thru with most bullshyt ain’t shyt dudes spitting. Men just now getting caught up. And good women being fed up with silly shyt and doing for themselves has rendered fukkboi bullshyt irrelevant for most chicks except for the types of bum bytches men keep complaining about. You know, the ones with roaches in their cribs who’ll let the homies hit and swallow nut like handshakes, or are so treacherous that they view u as a walking, breathing scam. Those are the ones MEN choose up on for easy p*ssy but then get mad at water being wet and wanna talk about the lack of marriage material.

But none of that matters. A woman with a good head on her shoulders demands a cooperative, positive, loving relationship with one man who wants to build something real. She won’t tolerate disrespect and has no incentive to overlook shyt like him cheating or fukking her over, unbalanced power dynamics or any other goofy shyt b/c in this era of opportunity, she doesn’t have to.

No rantIng, shaming tactics, angry bird HOH babble, lying, denial, impotent gon change that.

Get in where u fit in and enjoy the ride.

 

[⠝⠕⠏⠑]

Why are soman women complaining about men "not acting like real men" these days?

Depends on the chick. Some chicks ain’t shyt themselves so they wouldn’t recognize a thorough man anyway.

Other women haven’t reconciled the new paradigm of having new freedoms and opportunities that women in the past didn’t have, with the responsibility that comes with that. Namely giving up the expectation that men are the sole providers, protectors, initiators, pursuers. It’s called the women empowerment movement. But they didn’t listen to Peter Parker’s uncle. “With great power comes...”
So them chicks out there They want 100% power with 0% accountability.

Other women who are good women who may express this may have a legitimate gripe b/c there are men who want 100% power with 0% accountability too. When u date around, it’s not hard to run into fukkery.

 

[⠝⠕⠏⠑]

By the same man, 90% of the times.

You did not see too many Black women with 10 kids by 6 & 7 baby daddies 50 years ago.

I'm calling bullshyt.

Now, I've got women in my family who had a husband who they had kids with, then he died and she got remarried and had more kids.

But just 6,7,8,9 kids from hoeing around?

You'll rarely find that before the '70s & '80s in our community.

Which is strange, because there's never been more birth control options to prevent exactly that from happening.



There's a lot of truth in this.

Men (especially Black men) don't want to hear that a lot of the armor that women (especially Black women) have put up is due to watching their mothers, grandmothers, aunties, etc. . .get dogged out, cheated on, and beat on for years.

Of course those women are gonna grow up viewing marriage as something they could take or leave

And we as Black men have to also question all that "playa" shyt that goes back to the '70s and how it helped to drive a wedge between Black men & women in our community.

nikkaz wanna blame Hip-Hop for everything, but all that "Superfly" "Goldie" shyt probably inspired just as much fukkery.

THANK YOU!!!! These goofy dudes act like I’m marriage Hitler for pointing out OBVIOUS shyt.
I be sitting like...how da hell they problematize such OBVIOUS shyt?

Hell im surprised this opting out of marriage didn’t happen sooner, particularly for women.

Dudes don came in here and tried every trick in the book.
“Gon be alone”
“Who hurt you”
“You crazy!”

Why? Because they know the deal. Women pay lip service to marriage but traditional marriage for MANY women in the past was HELL and most women ain’t putting up with the bullshyt if they don’t have to.

Being cheated on, lumped up, tired as hell doing the lions share of shyt, and for what. Dudes not even fulfilling their vows to provide, protect and honor. AND go thru all that to not even get an orgasm b/c some dudes get so egotistical that they won’t even listen to a chick tell them what would get her off.

Women put up with that shyt in the old days b:c they had to. You one of 15 brothers or sisters. Either u got a husband, joined the nunnery but u damn sure weren’t sticking around to be another mouth to feed for ur parents.
Jobs were limited for women outside of the household. So they sucked it up, took them lumps, looked the other way when he made a family down the street, and either did they dirt in secret or took out their depression on themselves or their children. And some STILL got abandoned even while being “good traditional wives”

These dudes goofy as hell if they think that dumb shyt will fly when women damn near participating in the workforce more than men and making their own money.

Women outchea buying their own houses. This week I’ve been flying from state to state on job interviews for tenure positions and I’ve seen entire colleges and departments run by women. In relationships, most women don’t give a damn anymore about the fukk shyt. Cheat and u get cheated on. Either ya’ll both cooking and cleaning or everybody starving in a dirty ass crib.

Otherwise nobody is trying to hear the other shyt. And if she acts like she’s okay with it, she pullin MEAN game but they won’t believe that either.
I won’t even get into that pimp/hoe dynamic and the damage it did in our community. Got clit shriveling dudes thinking they entitled to fukking over chicks and insulting any woman unwilling to entertain that nonsense.

 

[⠝⠕⠏⠑]

Its not about sacrifice. If you can’t attract a man who has those traits it’s because you don’t possess the qualities to get a man who is loving attractive and sexually skilled. All woman want it but few can attract it. They lack desirability


As for cheating that’s entirely women’s fault. Men shouldn’t have these sexual options. It’s not a common problem in stricter societies as most women keep there’s legs closed. Women want to be able to sleep around and then wonder why men can’t resist. We aren’t wired to resist. A man can populate a whole village and will if you let him.

Oh LAWD! Ya’ll lost. Women have plenty of sexual options as well. Even more than men, and yet u expect one group to resist, while making dumb excuses for the other.

Stop blaming a lack of restraint and “my dikk” mentality on biology. Biological impulse is not a catch all for a lack of discipline.
Naturally we pee and shyt everywhere. But we evolved to potty train ourselves b/c peeing and shytting indiscriminately severely compromises quality of life. Same deal with sex. Being able to do something is NEVER a justification to do so.

“Wired”... Some of ya’ll grasping at straws to justify shytting on women and them piping down and taking it.

LAWST