I AM WE ARE
Banned
These women with the"my son is my king, man of the house, etc" shyt is a bad look and needs to be addressed as well
Is Shame missing in our community?
- Thread starter Busted_Toes
- Start date
Shame and accountability are needed imo
Since about 15 i have had propositions to get into the adult entertainment industry..
I Definitely thought about doing some wild stuff for money and curiosity only the "my dad will KILL me and disown the body if he finds out" deterred me. Not even the fear of my mum had that much influence over my decisions and she used to beat me not him.
He is disappointed in me already for having my children out of wedlock albeit all with the same man. Its "taboo" and "abomination" to let a man that is not your husband use you for a "public latrine"
Since about 15 i have had propositions to get into the adult entertainment industry..
I Definitely thought about doing some wild stuff for money and curiosity only the "my dad will KILL me and disown the body if he finds out" deterred me. Not even the fear of my mum had that much influence over my decisions and she used to beat me not him.
He is disappointed in me already for having my children out of wedlock albeit all with the same man. Its "taboo" and "abomination" to let a man that is not your husband use you for a "public latrine"
Shame has severely lost its potency for a lotta logical and logistic socio-emotional reasons.
Old paradigms based off shame don’t last and give rise to chaos because 1.) the shame is usually one-sided, hypocritical and coming from those in power towards those who have less agency and 2.) when it has no basis in reality due to increased mobility and agency of those under your influence.
Shame is often a social tool of support for dominant power structures. But once people pull back the veil and expose the hypocrisy of the actions of those trying to check others, then the power of shame becomes obsolete. Also once people try things for themselves and their lives don’t fall apart the way shamers initially claimed, it makes shame even less powerful.
To use shame sustainably, those shaming others have to be reasonably above reproach themselves. That’s just the way our brains work. Otherwise, the mechanism is rendered obsolete. In other words, the whole “do as I say not as I do” mentality makes people disregard the judgement of others as hypocritical and something no one cares about. And for shame to work, you also need an unrealistic amount of control over certain parameters such as how big your group is, how many are in your group, where they can go or travel and ect.
Because if the person you are trying to shame into doing something has other options more favorable than your vision and room or space to thrive outside of your vision, then they don’t care about your shaming them.
It’s like a blind person trying to shame somebody else for having poor vision. Or trying to shame somebody into staying in a small town.
If the shame is not tied to real negative consequences that can’t be mitigated by making different life choices and it’s coming from hypocrites, it’s power is nil. So if you want to leverage the real power of shame, keep your own community small and isolated and ensure that those seeking to shame others are of good character or manipulative enough to ensure they are never questioned. This is why cults are so powerful.
Personally, I think shame can be useful but it’s not gonna work in today’s society and we need to move beyond reliance on it to heal our society.
Old paradigms based off shame don’t last and give rise to chaos because 1.) the shame is usually one-sided, hypocritical and coming from those in power towards those who have less agency and 2.) when it has no basis in reality due to increased mobility and agency of those under your influence.
Shame is often a social tool of support for dominant power structures. But once people pull back the veil and expose the hypocrisy of the actions of those trying to check others, then the power of shame becomes obsolete. Also once people try things for themselves and their lives don’t fall apart the way shamers initially claimed, it makes shame even less powerful.
To use shame sustainably, those shaming others have to be reasonably above reproach themselves. That’s just the way our brains work. Otherwise, the mechanism is rendered obsolete. In other words, the whole “do as I say not as I do” mentality makes people disregard the judgement of others as hypocritical and something no one cares about. And for shame to work, you also need an unrealistic amount of control over certain parameters such as how big your group is, how many are in your group, where they can go or travel and ect.
Because if the person you are trying to shame into doing something has other options more favorable than your vision and room or space to thrive outside of your vision, then they don’t care about your shaming them.
It’s like a blind person trying to shame somebody else for having poor vision. Or trying to shame somebody into staying in a small town.
If the shame is not tied to real negative consequences that can’t be mitigated by making different life choices and it’s coming from hypocrites, it’s power is nil. So if you want to leverage the real power of shame, keep your own community small and isolated and ensure that those seeking to shame others are of good character or manipulative enough to ensure they are never questioned. This is why cults are so powerful.
Personally, I think shame can be useful but it’s not gonna work in today’s society and we need to move beyond reliance on it to heal our society.
Ezekiel 25:17
Veteran
But the coli told me you an incel for tryna regulate hoes
That's one thing about black men, we let women hoe themselves out because we love hoes
. We the least strict on women.
Me personally I don't care. I mind my own business and let folks do them. If they lost, they lost. I believe Shaming dont work anyway because eventually folks gone let loose behind closed doors
That's one thing about black men, we let women hoe themselves out because we love hoes. We the least strict on women.Me personally I don't care. I mind my own business and let folks do them. If they lost, they lost. I believe Shaming dont work anyway because eventually folks gone let loose behind closed doors
I AM WE ARE
Banned
Got check time, how many of y'all hold your boys accountable for their actions?
Tribal Outkast
Veteran
Yeah shyt is out of control. I just wish I could participate but I couldn’t look at myself in the mirror afterwards. Chicks out here promoting their onlyfans in posts right after showing their kids/family pictures
Folks beating up and shooting people on camera, etc. I just try to keep a low profile out here.
Folks beating up and shooting people on camera, etc. I just try to keep a low profile out here.
I AM WE ARE
Banned
We not asking you toBut the coli told me you an incel for tryna regulate hoes
Me personally I don't care. I mind my own business and let folks do them. If they lost, they lost. I believe Shaming dont work anyway because eventually folks gone let loose behind closed doors
bruh but keep your circle of friends, etc on the right path.
SOCIAL MEDIA CHANGED EVERYTHING.
THERES ALWAYS TONS OF
WEIRDOS WHO WILL COSIGN
ANY GIVEN TOPIC
AT ANY GIVEN TIME.
SOCIAL MEDIA HAS GIVEN
EVERY LOSER A VOICE AND ARMY.
THERES ALWAYS TONS OF
WEIRDOS WHO WILL COSIGN
ANY GIVEN TOPIC
AT ANY GIVEN TIME.
SOCIAL MEDIA HAS GIVEN
EVERY LOSER A VOICE AND ARMY.
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I AM WE ARE
Banned
I'm telling my age but how we go from LL cool J to 2pac to soft ass Drake. Rappers always made a song or two for the female fans. Drake outchea singing on every record. Dude is Taylor swift. You knew/figured LL could fight, pac studio thug or not, he was with the shyt, but Drake? C'mon bruh. These women settling for dudes who dress like them. I did security and I asked a female jokingly, say ma'am you with dude butt if something happens he can't defend you if he can't get to a gun. Her response was"at least he got drip, look how he dressed"
The whole dump your elder in a nursing home is some cac shyt but it's dying because of current economics
I AM WE ARE
Banned
Women don't respect
Bruh I'm seeing more of our own in homes and it's depressing
ISO
Pass me the rock nikka
If you shame you get labeled anti-*insert identity* and get hit with some thinkpiece basically you end up being the one shamed
The intersectionality and identity politics shyt is fukking everything up
The intersectionality and identity politics shyt is fukking everything up
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