If a HUSBAND is not capable of having his WIFE quit her job or RETIRE ..he is an UNDERACHIVER to HER

[mcdivit85]

My plan, if and when I get married, is to have my wife stay at home during the first few years of the childrens' life. I would just feel weak as a man if I had to see my wife go back to work a few weeks after having a child. I think she needs time to let her body recover as well as her hormones. Plus, I would not feel good having my newly born child in a new born daycare, so quickly after being born.

So, ideally, my wife would stay home the first 3-4 years for each child until they are ready for some type of pre-k program. At the minimum, I believe a man should be able to have his wife stay home for at least the first year after giving birth. After this, she can restart her career.

On another note, some of you dudes are truly funny style. You don't want career focused chicks who put their career at priority. You don't want chicks who are too busy. Yet you want chicks who bring in close to or just as much money as you. You want chicks who will have the time and desire to cook, clean and cater to you like they have nothing else to do. You want chicks who are focused solely on you and the kids all the while maintaining a 40 hour minimum job with deadlines, meetings and business travel.

If you want a woman to be able to cater to you all the time, you have to give her the time and energy to do that. How do you do that? Remove her from the workforce, so she's not spending the majority of her week focused on what's going on inside of a cubicle.

Otherwise, you really do share that girl....with her emails, with her colleagues and damn sure with her boss.

Peace

 

[Hacksaw Jim Thuggin]

Um lawd

Do you think she feels the same way?

we sleeping in separate rooms breh

the 'talk' is imminent....things may have run their course

 

[Rockstar Mom]

I'm a stay at home mom(kind of). I'm in school part-time, 2 days a week. After I graduate, I only plan on working part time, until my youngest is in school. I grew up in a house with a working career mother, so I don't see myself being a full time stay at home mom/wife. But I'll probably always work part time, so I can be available to take the kids to their extra curricular activities, attend all the school plays and functions, and be an involved parent overall.

 

[Hacksaw Jim Thuggin]

Life is too short for that...

Time to get some marriage counselling and if that don't help then the big D.

When did things change? Was she always unappreciative?

its been subtle changes a couple of years now....or maybe im just starting to notice

and you're right about life being too short....im qutting a job i didnt like anymore...might as well add another big life change to the mix

 

[Anerdyblackguy]

its been subtle changes a couple of years now....or maybe im just starting to notice

and you're right about life being too short....im qutting a job i didnt like anymore...might as well add another big life change to the mix

Sorry to hear about your relationship man

 

[Bigtymer301]

Naw I see her point. You can't be a mom, wife and a career woman at the same time. But our North America lifestyle doesn't support this idea. It doesn't make financial sense and that's what makes me salty.

The bolded is the only reason I would have a problem with a wife not working. Money drives everything. So the more you have/make/accumulate, the more you can do. Why limit your household income? More is better. The more money coming in, the happier everyone will be, especially the wife. The majority of marriages end because of either infidelity, or money issues. With a stay at home wife, you open yourself up to both issues. Plus like others said, if it doesn't work, better believe you will be paying alimony. If we are talking about a loyal women (which are far and few between, although many claim to be) then I have no problem ultimately with it. If she is going to do the housework, take care of the kids, have meals cooked, and be faithful it's whatever. But naw, she ain't gonna just be sitting on her ass taking selfies and posting on social media all day. I don't necessarily believe it has to be 50/50, but you damn sure gonna contribute.

 

[MF budz]

Well I already have one kid and that's all I want. So yes if me and a girl get together she better have her own shyt too. I'm not supporting you, I have me and kid to look out for. And obviously if she ain't cool with it then bye.

God some of these broads just walking around waiting to get knocked up and stay home allday. I'm good.

 

[Ashley Banks]

lol

 

[KENNY DA COOKER]

Why you always with somebody else wife bro?

Sir...I provide "CONSULTATION" services



I don't consider myself a
sidepiece

I'm more like an ADVISOR

 

[intruder]

after an "intimate" conversation with somebody's Wife..I've come to the realization

if your unable to let them be a stay at home mom..or ETERNAL housewife who just shops and provides her husband company and "support" it's safe to say she see you as a FAILURE

And Mostly Explains why she is sooo MISERABLE in yall HAPPY MARRIAGE

#thesehoesdontwannawork

#theydontwannapartnership

#theywannasponsorship

#GMB

While i used to believe this myself. I've recently started to rethink this after seeing two of my close friends who were living that lifestyle and how it ended badly.

While i believe that every man owes it to themselves to make enough money so his wife never HAVE TO work. I now believe that the wife should still do the same or at least be able to make her own money enough to sustain that same lifestyle on her own.

I'm heading out right now so i cant stay long but later i'll come back to the thread and explain the dangerous pitfall that comes with this lifestyle.

 

[Hacksaw Jim Thuggin]

Sorry to hear about your relationship man

to be honest im kinda to it....

i went to 2 friends' funerals in december...both way too young to be dying...puts things in perspective....life is too short...especially to stress over women....and this isnt me trying to be on some playa shyt...we were friends...and im sure i'll miss her

BUT

when my time comes im gonna be laying on the embalming table ALONE...so i owe it to myself to live my life to the fullest, nobody else is responsible for my happiness but me...if you not going to enjoy life....WHAT ARE YOU DOING?

edit: plus im 41...i have a whole different outlook on life than yall do

 

[MsReal]

its been subtle changes a couple of years now....or maybe im just starting to notice

and you're right about life being too short....im qutting a job i didnt like anymore...might as well add another big life change to the mix

to be honest im kinda to it....

i went to 2 friends' funerals in december...both way too young to be dying...puts things in perspective....life is too short...especially to stress over women....and this isnt me trying to be on some playa shyt...we were friends...and im sure i'll miss her

BUT

when my time comes im gonna be laying on the embalming table ALONE...so i owe it to myself to live my life to the fullest, nobody else is responsible for my happiness but me...if you not going to enjoy life....WHAT ARE YOU DOING?

edit: plus im 41...i have a whole different outlook on life than yall do

Seriously sit down and talk to your wife.

Tell her you feel you have no option but to separate if things do not change permanently.

Anyone who is planning on having a woman as a stay at home partner, unless you have great life/ redundancy insurance you're setting your family up for a mighty fall. If you suddenly die/ get laid off... your kids and family will be even more devastated.

Most women I know with kids work part-time, for the socialisation, money and intellectual stimulus...

 

[Mass]

we sleeping in separate rooms breh

the 'talk' is imminent....things may have run their course

What?!!!!

This is married nikka #1 on the coli... I need to read a few pages back ...

I made a th read asking how a man can fukk one bitxh over and over and over for the rest of his life n he was the first to tell me I was just young .... which I do believe actually ... but still I need to know

 

[Lithe]

No problem. I think I respect your position more because of my own mother and father. My mother is highly educated BS in Nursing/minor in math ( Hunter College), MS in Nursing ( Long Island University) go "Pioneers", so I have always seen her work. She didn't work in the first two years I was born though. As you said earlier the traditional life is for some people, but not for all. My mother would give any women who didn't have a career or degree the major .

I understand and respect that! I take after the women on my dad's side who are all highly educated. I'm talking lawyers, doctors, government jobs, financial analysts for major companies... My father and I were very close, and I admired his hard work and dedication to his family. He did whatever was (working 12 hour shifts/overtime) necessary to provide for us.

Unfortunately, my mother found a way to complain and be ungrateful about that. It was just too stressful growing up listening to their arguments. I do not want that for my children! My mom did go back to work a couple of times, but she didn't really find out what kept her fulfilled until we were already grown and out of the house. That's sad to me... I just have the insight to see ahead of time and hold true to myself to be single now while getting to know who has the same values as me.

I won't even get into a relationship with a guy (not into having someone just to say I have someone--hate wasting time) who doesn't have the same long term vision as me. That's how serious this is to me.

I sincerely do applaud people who make it work for her to stay at home, I just know what it's like from the inside when/if financial issues "you're never home, you don't love me, blah blah bullshyt" arises, and no thank you.

My family was also deeply affected by the recession, as my father and 728 other employees were laid off in 2007. Because he had been with that company 28/30 years, he was one of the last laid off in 2008. That's when I took a break from school and worked two jobs, full and part time to help my family. No one asked or expected me to, but I did what I felt I needed to do. I worked 12 days straight, 2 days off until my dad got another job and due to his experience, had the same salary as he did at his previous job.

That right there also made me determined to go back to school and get a degree that translates to a real life career, in case something happens. I can tell my husband "I got your back, babe." My kids won't have to worry that their world is crashing down. That time was very stressful and I was only 19, but I did what I needed to do. Teamwork makes the dream work! But they don't hear me.

I think too many people are too set on this ideal lifestyle of 6 figures, exotic vehicles, luxury vacations, 6 pack husband, sex kitten wife, perfect children. But be real! Really real. Make sure that you have what you need, and save to get some of what you want. Be real with yourself and then align yourself with those whose values match your own. That's the way to a successful marriage, whether it's traditional or both parents work. It is possible for both methods to provide a secure home, and I don't believe kids are neglected if both parents work. They're neglected if you neglect them. So find a way to make it work and realize there's levels to this.

I won't eat/sleep/breathe work, because that's not healthy and I value experiences more than material things, but I see no issue whatsoever with working when my kids are in school. It would help me as an individual, and I can contribute to our household in a financial way. That matters to me!

 

[⠝⠕⠏⠑]

So in this thread, men are all of a sudden feminists.
Lmao!

But seriously tho, the problem with these kinds of discussions is that people are trying to impress their gender by spouting some of the most inane nonsense in the world.
Most with the crazy radical views have never even been within the general vicinity of the opposite sex, much less in a relationship. So all ur opinions are based on internet bro tales and sista talk and hearsay.

Marriage isn't easy. If you are smart and thrifty, you can sustain a one child family off one income. And trust me, you will want to because home roles are so overwhelming that it's nearly impossible to balance that with a job and raise children properly.

Being a stay at home parent is a PRIVILEGE and a huge help to the overall wellbeing of a family unit. Hell it's quite possibly the most important role equivalent to the primary breadwinner.

When I get married I will have my PhD and hopefully tenure. This will allow me to be a stay at home mom. A university professor is probably one of the most sought after, flexible, reliable jobs in the U.S.

So I will be able to contribute financially to my household while still being with my children and lecturing and teaching the masses. However, I fully intend to be a stay at home mom for at least the first 6-7 years of my marriage and birth of my first child.

We don't do daycare in my family. No stranger will care for my children. I also don't do old folk homes so my parents will stay very close and watch the kids to give me and bae a break.