"I took a major L getting married, I make 150k and I'm broke" - My bestfriend

[QuintessentialMan]

Honestly, there is nothing wrong for your woman to not work, but she has to follow your lead, follow your guidance on money and goals. If you have her staying at home and not making any money, yet she spending all of your bred on bull shyt, that's where things will go south.

That was my biggest lesson from my marriage; if you make the money, be in charge of it - because she doesn't have any self control over it.

Yeah. I agree with you. I see this alot out here across Africa baby. Traditional status. Can get away with it here but not in the West.
Speaking to my American brehs, if she's at home all day its not a good look. Eventually she will get bored of daytime TV.

 

[Rawtid]

Get married solely for love, brehs. If two people can't put their money to together and make some positive financial moves, they deserve what they get. Quit trying to gaze in an mf's eyes and boast about having a live in maid and actually do something together that makes sense.

 

[Gunshi]

Was talking to one of my best friends today. Met dude in 2007, we started in the IT field together making 40-50k. He was married then and I was ripping and running. We both have made good money since, he's had 2 kids, Ive been single for most part. So he's kind of lived vicariously thru me. I always send him pics of my chicks, cars and tell him stories. We both love cars. Had not saw my boy in about 5 years up until 2 weeks ago, when we hungout and had an AWESOME time. With him being married and living far away. Dude told me today....

"bruh you gave me life that day, I really needed that. . I'm not happy, i'm not living. We all were fed that be a good man, be a good family man BS, but never get married dude. If I would have known I was going to be making this type of money, I wouldve never got married. I took a major L getting married, I make 150k and I'm broke. Everything I do is for my family. Sacrifice after sacrifice, bill after bill. I make 150k and drive a compact car so my wife and kids can have it all. And they dont really appreciate me or my work and sacrifice. I have to beg my wife for sex and rarely get it. You going to be the same way if you get married."


I take this as a real wake up call. Dude always keep it real about how horrible marriage is, but today I heard what sounds like him giving up on it all. Kind of scared me str8.



I have a great girl, pretty, cooks and cleans, doesn't go out, stays home and do what I say for most part but......

GMB for Life!!!

dat nikka aint lying, that marriage life will drain your life in every way possible, kill your dreams and everything...shyt's just painful, your life is reduced to going to work, coming home, play with the fam a bit, sleep and repeat.

 

[Mr swag]

Fathers NEVER get the credit. Didn't give mine either. He did everything lol

 

[QuintessentialMan]

dat nikka aint lying, that marriage life will drain your life in every way possible, kill your dreams and everything...shyt's just painful, your life is reduced to going to work, coming home, play with the fam a bit, sleep and repeat.

This is basically life breh, what were you expecting?
Age 0 to Age 17 is party time, little to no responsibilities
Age 18 to Age 35 is all about finally having money to stunt and travel or whatever and getting to style on girls while you can until you meet one with potential. If you havent blown up by now it might not be happening at all so better start facing facts, dreams already dead. Find and lock down steady income.
Age 35 onwards is pretty much just the bolded,mix in some dro and some vacations and voila: LIFE

 

[Yogi]

Your friend sounds weak. nikka crying about not having a nicer car because he has to sacrifice for his kids. That's what a man fukking does.

 

[Indiglow Meta (R$G)]

Your friend sounds weak. nikka crying about not having a nicer car because he has to sacrifice for his kids. That's what a man fukking does.

Programmed.

 

[mcdivit85]

"bruh you gave me life that day, I really needed that. . I'm not happy, i'm not living. We all were fed that be a good man, be a good family man BS, but never get married dude. If I would have known I was going to be making this type of money, I wouldve never got married. I took a major L getting married, I make 150k and I'm broke. Everything I do is for my family. Sacrifice after sacrifice, bill after bill. I make 150k and drive a compact car so my wife and kids can have it all. And they dont really appreciate me or my work and sacrifice. I have to beg my wife for sex and rarely get it. You going to be the same way if you get married."

What dude says "gave me life"?

Peace

 

[Indiglow Meta (R$G)]

How Sway?!? happiness comes from the inside...

nikkas see what they missed.
I'm 33 now, most of my homies are older.
Be 45 at the juke joint, brehs. Be a toothless tiger, brehs.

 

[BrehWyatt]

My wife makes over 100k more than me and I make more than 100k. Marry the right one breh's.

This. Not saying GMB isn't a real thing, because it is, but seriously, people have to extensively vet out those that they think they want to spend their lives with. Gotta understand who you are, what you're about and what matters to you and whether or not your PARTNER compromises or accentuates these things. OP's friend kind of shat the bed from the jump going into it as something he felt "he was supposed to do." He makes six figures yet he's broke. Kids cost, no doubt, but maybe the breh should have been a bit stingier with his cash, especially if his girl wasn't working.

You do what you want when you have the means, but that doesn't necessarily mean that you SHOULD.

Something my brother told me a while back was to never commit to somebody just because you love them. He said that while loving somebody can't hurt the situation, at the end of the day, the goals have to match or complement yours in some way or she had to be somebody that can help you reach the level you're trying to reach while you help her do the same. He basically termed it as a business partnership. It is this reason why he isn't still with the mother of my nephew. He admits he still loves her, and would rather be with her, but they aren't on the same wavelength when it comes to that. In laymen's terms, he feels she's thinking too small.

I digress, though. The point is, based on what OP is saying his boy chose the wrong partner or chose for the wrong reasons. Hence, it was doomed to be this way on some level.

However, it sounds like to me he feels underappreciated moreso than he made a mistake. His kids ... well, I don't know the breh but I'll assume they're pretty young. Those kids probably don't know any better about the sacrifices and all that being made for them to have more than what the dad did. All they know is that if they ask for it, daddy's got them, and that means the world to them. But that's what happens when you get married and have kids. Your wants and needs come secondary to your family's.

Can't speak on the wife, though. But if underappreciation is the problem, she can fix that. Has he told her how he feels?

 

[iBrowse]

I have no idea why men marry women whose salary doesn't complement theirs. The women should be able to pay her own car, shopping and eating out. Men love to take on that burden but always end up regretting it.

 

[Rekkapryde]

Most men with paper want a woman who is bringing something to the table as well. Those who don't are more easily dispensable.

 

[ℒℴѵℯJay ELECTUA]

Sorry @Jahmal we are not getting married..
































Yet

 

[Stuntone]

HOW YOU MAKE 150k AND STILL BE BROKE?!!?

!!

Easy, we were making 50k in 2007. I think his wife was making a little less. Slowly his income raised and their bills did too. When you get a raise you automatically feel you can afford more. His career grow and his wife's didn't, but trying to be a good family man will have you broke. Making sure your wife has a decent car and home. He has 2 kids. Trying to take a trip or 2 a year. That money goes.

And his wife probably cheating on him!!!!!!!

What dude says "gave me life"?

Peace

I took him out with a few of my female "friends" we were in Brazil if you ask him.
No lie bruh. If you hanging with me in the DMV on the weekend. There's a 99% chance youre going to remember that night forever.

 

[Stuntone]

How Sway?!? happiness comes from the inside...

That's a crock a BS. I hate these sound good illogical quotes.

Most people happiness comes for the outside. My happiness comes from seeing my family doing well and happy.


You can't get head from the inside?




Beat it with this BS