How Come Black Men Fail At Fatherhood and Marriage?

[Chris.B]

I really don't know if the cycle is reversible at this point...

It's not.

What we are witnessing is the single motherhood endorsed by feminists coming home to roost.

When I was growing up I kept my ways in check because my father will discipline the sh!t out of me if I slipped up. You can't even scream at a black kid without her loud as mom saying "Don't scream at my baby".

we are producing SOFT men. Men who talk a lot but can't do sh!t!

 

[Wild self]

It's like we welcome being a child until our 60's

LOL @ anyone 30 and up going to the club to "chase p*ssy." You know how absurd and weak that sounds? Chasing p*ssy like a high school student when you old enough to be an elected official in office. No wonder dudes like 2 Chainz is blowing up, cause he relates to the current mid to late 30s heads that still act like a damn college student.

 

[Wild self]

It's not.

What we are witnessing is the single motherhood endorsed by feminist coming home to roost.

When I was growing up I kept my ways in check because my father will discipline the sh!t out of me if I slipped up. You can even screen at a black kid without her loud as mom saying "Don't scream at my baby".

we are producing SOFT men. Men who talk a l lot but can't do sh!t!

Yup, I think that the crack epidemic completely fukked us up beyond repair. Now you got these simp ass dudes kissing women's asses to get approval for sex. SEX! shyt is beyond lame how this once predominantly black problem is now spreading across the board in America. Now you got these simp ass dudes under 35 these days that let their woman control them and act up.

 

[Ain't That Something]

Because they look to the wrong people for direction. I don't understand what's so thrilling about your father being in and out of jail, selling drugs, shot at, being chased by the cops, etc that was SO fascinating that you wanted to be EXACTLY like him when you grew up.

Do you not understand how fukked up it is to think that way? The ONLY group I know that shuns education because that's the ONLY way to save you from yourself. Black men are allowing themselves to deteriorate and it's sad.

Bc that's the only source of role model the media constantly pushes down our throat! I almost fell pray to it and became a victim of that delusion, but now I am wiser.

 

[Just like bruddas]

yall need to deal with ya inner demons in a more creative way besides making threads about them

 

[Sandy_Cheeks]

it's a vicious cycle coming from slavery and fatherless girls grow up and get pregnant as teenagers searching for that father figure or love. Fatherless boys never saw male responsibility growing up and their teenage mother always had men running in and out, so they never saw stability.

The end result is hoes getting trains ran on them by whole communities and the off spring of these bust a nut sessions are criminals, gays, thugs and men who honestly have no idea how to be men.

Black people wake up

Not only that but our prison system is designed to keep US in it so that they (cacs) have still have some sense of control over us. We are locked up more than whites and mexicans. Most of our Men are in jail and the numbers are growing. To me it's more than "black people wake up". We are up against a system that in essensce is trying to destroy, control, and dominate us.

Our afro american culture in this country has been influenced by many things including slavery, jim crow, ect. This will always be a them against us issue.

 

[Sandy_Cheeks]

Bc that's the only source of role model the media constantly pushes down our throat! I almost fell pray to it and became a victim of that delusion, but now I am wiser.

Exatly. The media projects "certain" role models when it comes to afro american for a reason. It enforces so many internalized beliefs about us that many people have including our own.


If a little boy grows up without a father, who else is he to look to?

 

[dora_da_destroyer]

gotta send "successful" black men back into these communities to keep these little dudes from trying to be "about that life"...there also aren't many black male teachers, that shyt is huge when you're going through the shyt you go through growing up and you don't have any teacher, for years on end, who can relate to you, who you'd actually consider taking advice from

 

[bzb]

*SOME black men.

the obvious reasons most of you haven't touched on is the us gov made it a primary goal to straight up sabotage the black man and black families from the time slavery was abolished. the impact of slavery on the psyche of black men and black women that persisted courtesy of jim crow laws and segregation. then they doubled down on their efforts in the 1950s for almost 50 years straight.

-sending our black men off to war (vietnam, etc) in disparate numbers compared to the white counterparts.
-the introduction of gangs and drugs into our communities. courtesy of the cia.
-unfair sentencing and drug guidelines.
-law enforcement stereotyping and quotas unfairly targeting minorities.
-deeply ingrained 'good ol boy' agendas in professional and political institutions that keep blacks from gaining access to higher levels.
-inadequate healthcare treatment and advisement even for those with insurance. especially compared to white counterparts.
-the entertainment industries promoting negative stereotypes in our community that keeps the vicious cycles going.

i've always promoted the pull yourself up by the bootstraps and take responsibility for your own life frame of mind. a lot of black men have been successful following that model. but there is no denying the cards have been stacked against black men by a vicious and organized group of bigots that have power in the system.

we're breaking through some of those barriers, but there has been so much damage already done that it still is going to take a few generations for black men to regain a level playing field and the success we should have as a whole compared to our male counterparts in other races.

makes me mad when i think about how many challenges black men face and how a lot of us just give up because it seems there is no way to win. and the gov makes it easy for us to give up with the social services handouts. (wic, welfare, etc.) but you know what, it makes us the ones who do succeed that much stronger. now why some successful black men abandon our community and our women is a whole other issue...i need a break...

 

[ThatTruth777]

We?

I knew you dumb ass nikkas would take this trolls bait

Man I was about to type a lot of shyt too but I caught myself. The title some real mess though , dudes always trying to implicate black people who don't do foul shyt or never have with those that do on some
"why do black men beat the shyt outta their dogs, cats, women, and mommas; etc.? tell me why brehs "

 

[DaChampIsHere]

I knew you dumb ass nikkas would take this trolls bait

They
http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-uZ9WPpmK-Ws/Thu8NgAkobI/AAAAAAAAPxI/FmBfxiDx4Xk/s1600/DGBdancingc00n.gif

 

[bouncy]

it's a vicious cycle coming from slavery and fatherless girls grow up and get pregnant as teenagers searching for that father figure or love. Fatherless boys never saw male responsibility growing up and their teenage mother always had men running in and out, so they never saw stability.

The end result is hoes getting trains ran on them by whole communities and the off spring of these bust a nut sessions are criminals, gays, thugs and men who honestly have no idea how to be men.

Black people wake up

Vicious cycle from slavery?

You always had huge numbers of fathers in the home back in the day, the single mother phenomenon started during the late '60's, and 70's, when the government made it cool to not have a man in the house in order to receive benefits. This made it possible for women to do what they wanted, without a man not agreeing with them, and having a say with how money is distributed in the house. This then led to children having a warp sense of how the world is, and for men this wasn't good because they didn't either get the nurturing they need to make it in this world or they were spoiled to the point that they didn't learn how money works, and what routes were needed to make it without doing illegal things to get quick money.

Women were taught the same things, but more were taught to get a job to control their household, and NOT need a man. This was easy to do since women fulfilled two quotas. They were women, and they were black. Having a degree made it even easier since more jobs started leaning towards service type jobs, and not physical labor or jobs that required some type of skill.

The only way things will change is when men figure out the world, and how the jobs their mothers told them to get, was not made for them, but for the women, to easily get hired. The men need to do skillful jobs to where there is a better chance of them being hired. They also need to deal with the issues that come from being in a single mother household, but I doubt this will be dealt with because in the black community, the mother is like GOD, and can do know wrong. Everything is the fathers fault. Until we can be honest with how our mothers issues effect us, nothing will change.

One thing I always give white people is they are truthful when talking about how their parents raised them, both the father AND the mother. This allows them to be able to grow into healthy individuals that can make smart moves in this world, and grow to live some of their dreams. I'm not saying they are perfect in this area, but they are way better then us, and it shows in how they deal with each other in relationships compared ot how we deal with each other.

 

[Sonic Boom of the South]

a cac made this thread and people are seriously responding to this ignorant ass racist shyt

 

[bouncy]

a cac made this thread and people are seriously responding to this ignorant ass racist shyt

It still needs to be talked about, because this way of life is starting to effect other races in America also, which means it won't be good for men, and the women who need men to be healthy individuals. It is not good to be alone, in unhealthy relationships, or going from relationship to relationship, especially when kids are in the picture.

 

[Sandy_Cheeks]

Vicious cycle from slavery?

You always had huge numbers of fathers in the home back in the day, the single mother phenomenon started during the late '60's, and 70's, when the government made it cool to not have a man in the house in order to receive benefits. This made it possible for women to do what they wanted, without a man not agreeing with them, and having a say with how money is distributed in the house. This then led to children having a warp sense of how the world is, and for men this wasn't good because they didn't either get the nurturing they need to make it in this world or they were spoiled to the point that they didn't learn how money works, and what routes were needed to make it without doing illegal things to get quick money.

Women were taught the same things, but more were taught to get a job to control their household, and NOT need a man. This was easy to do since women fulfilled two quotas. They were women, and they were black. Having a degree made it even easier since more jobs started leaning towards service type jobs, and not physical labor or jobs that required some type of skill.

The only way things will change is when men figure out the world, and how the jobs their mothers told them to get, was not made for them, but for the women, to easily get hired. The men need to do skillful jobs to where there is a better chance of them being hired. They also need to deal with the issues that come from being in a single mother household, but I doubt this will be dealt with because in the black community, the mother is like GOD, and can do know wrong. Everything is the fathers fault. Until we can be honest with how our mothers issues effect us, nothing will change.

One thing I always give white people is they are truthful when talking about how their parents raised them, both the father AND the mother. This allows them to be able to grow into healthy individuals that can make smart moves in this world, and grow to live some of their dreams. I'm not saying they are perfect in this area, but they are way better then us, and it shows in how they deal with each other in relationships compared ot how we deal with each other.

Thats not entirely true. The slave masters would purposely sell off mothers and fathers leaving broken homes and not giving 2 fukks about it.