Colored People webseries (Directed & written by Coli member ghostwriterx) EP04 is up!

[Jax]

What?
Did you like it? if so you're the target audience, mission accomplished

There's no target audience you smug bytch

 

[Humble (Not) Mike Tyson]

@ghostwriterx

Impressive production, brother!

 

[Larry Lobster]

There's no target audience you smug bytch

Oh really, so you just record random people, talking random stuff, upload it, and wait for random people to watch it...
Is that what you're saying?

 

[TheGodling]

I think the humor could be a bit sharper/cleverer, like the Indian guy with curry or the "Why do white people... why do black people..." exchange are too basic/obvious. The cast is solid though and the timing of the jokes is pretty good so all in all it's a decent effort, but every show needs something to set it apart and right now there isn't.

 

[SCORCH]

Not bad. I'll check for more episodes.

@TheGodling summed up my thoughts quite well.

 

[Milk N Cookies]

 

[Taadow]

Thoughts:

- Wardell is already my favorite character on TV and he ain't on TV yet.
- @ghostwriterx ...a couple more edgy lines from Evan, and Dean might be gettin' beat up on the street...
- I think you did aight as a writer, but maybe you should get a co- to add ideas. Case in point:
when Evan and Jada had the exchange about "that's how they got the slaves" and Evan said
"think of it as a bonding experience"...there was an opportunity for a GREAT joke there and you missed it.

It was still aight, doe.

 

[Higher Tech]

I like stuff like this. Reminds me of The Office mixed with 10 Items or Less. There's room to grow, but kudos to what you have so far. You're doing well. I'll support it. Keep the webisodes coming.

 

[ghostwriterx]

Thoughts:

- Wardell is already my favorite character on TV and he ain't on TV yet.
- @ghostwriterx ...a couple more edgy lines from Evan, and Dean might be gettin' beat up on the street...
- I think you did aight as a writer, but maybe you should get a co- to add ideas. Case in point:
when Evan and Jada had the exchange about "that's how they got the slaves" and Evan said
"think of it as a bonding experience"...there was an opportunity for a GREAT joke there and you missed it.

It was still aight, doe.

Damn you're right. Didn't even peep that.

 

[Black smoke and cac jokes]

This shyt seems cool breh, keep doing you.

Some critique though:
- the race conversations are very shallow and there's no build up to where you want the back-and-forth between the characters to go.
- develop the characters, in these kind of shows/webisodes etc you need strong characters that the audience FIRST relate to, and then focus on the interactions

Good job though, hope it goes well!

 

[Big Blue]

I was legit laughing at the elevator seen. "Which elevator???? The one that's stuck

 

[StraxStrax]

I am really impressed and glad that you guys are creating this supportive ecosystem for creativity
may watch later

The Coli Coalition

 

[Xbox One X]

I'll give it a watch.....looks good and positive, unlike that corny and unfunny @Big Skilly Films

 

[Mr Rager]

I liked it, kinda wished it was longer

That's what she said.

This is awesome though! Reps and a for the creativity

 

[Lord Scion]

I share the criticism that you kind of went way overboard with the race stuff, especially the whole "I'm black... I don't do ______ " ol girl kept spitting. But, this does show promise and I'll keep checking it.

oh yea...