Ciara is trending on Twitter and catching flack for apparently being a hypocrite

[mamba]

Maybe. Only because other races looks fade quicker. But typically a hood chick want a hood dude. It's all they know; all they can relate to

It's not a mindset limited to hoodrats, breh.

You have educated women out here playing around in the mid-20s. Then, when they hit 30, they want to get serious about mating.

It doesn't work that way. A man reaching his peak at 30 is in no rush to settle down with a 30-year-old woman. He will take his time, which clashes with the clock she has running in her head.

Most 30+ women, who played around and are in a rush to marry, should target brehs in their late-30s and early 40s. Typically, those brehs will likely have a kid or two or will be divorced. But, they are more likely to marry quickly compared to brehs in their early 30s who have no baggage.

 

[mamba]

If you're gonna play the deflection game, don't be so transparent with it. I do not partake in those stupid ass "African VS. AA" wars so cut out it.

I meant that growing up in a West African culture, marriage is very stressed (but I suspect you knew what I meant).

African culture isn't Black American culture. My ancestors were enslaved.

Our culture was b*stardized.

As a result, some of the basic things such as manhood/womanhood training are not as strong compared to other cultures that haven't been deliberately b*stardized.

A lot of Black American women and men haven't been schooled in the art of manhood and womanhood.

Coming from a West African background, some things you take for granted in terms of your "schooling" are things a lot of Black Americans did not have growing up.

 

[mson]

Ciara with the heel turn on these hoes

 

[Guess Who]

Nikka please I'm African.

You think I'm actually looking to learn from you goofies? I'm asking for his opinion because the words have been thrown around here and almost no one wants to be honest and state what they REALLY mean by "wife material." They would rather be intellectually lazy by demonizing women with education and careers.

I don’t think some of these men in here are demonizing educated career women, what they’re saying in my opinion is that being just those things doesn’t make a woman a good wife.

Men want women who are emotionally mature, don’t expect us to read their minds, women who express their complaints with what they would like you to do differently and why, women who can communicate clearly and fairly, women who put family first, women who are fair and argue without insults/silent treatment/contempt, etc.

Being a good mate, for any gender, is actually really fukking hard. Most people suck at it which is why so many relationships fail. What men are saying here, though, is that being a good mate is deeper than looking good, having your shyt together financially and being good at sex.

Being a good mate, imo, is essentially about having respect for oneself and others and being willing to work with your partner rather than being in competition with them about being right when you encounter disagreement. Not throwing shade btw, just expressing my opinion.

 

[Azul]

African culture isn't Black American culture. My ancestors were enslaved.

Our culture was b*stardized.

As a result, some of the basic things such as manhood/womanhood training are not as strong compared to other cultures that haven't been deliberately b*stardized.

A lot of Black American women and men haven't been schooled in the art of manhood and womanhood.

Coming from a West African background, some things you take for granted in terms of your "schooling" are things a lot of Black Americans did not have growing up.

You're trying to take this alllllllll the way left when all I did was let you know your assumption was wrong.

You don't know what I take for granted man, just stop.

 

[Cynic]

So women who care about having a successful career and an education that they could be proud of have "baggage" and are masculine.

Being docile is feminine.

Black women wait to think about marriage... that's the narrative we're running with now huh?

thethethecoli.com

Nope, take for example african/immigrant women. They are just as driven yet submit to their men at home.

That masculine abrasive energy stays at work while these spinsters bring it home and
weaponize their pussies.

Huge debts/p*ssy rationing and being a control freak = wifey material

Thecoli.com

 

[Rell Lauren]

Nikka please I'm African.

You think I'm actually looking to learn from you goofies? I'm asking for his opinion because the words have been thrown around here and almost no one wants to be honest and state what they REALLY mean by "wife material." They would rather be intellectually lazy by demonizing women with education and careers.

You're African, yet the best of your people come here and to the UK because your overall incompetence as a collective made the African continent a shythole, but giggle about being African.

 

[Azul]

I don’t think some of these men in here are demonizing educated career women, what they’re saying in my opinion is that being just those things doesn’t make a woman a good wife.

Men want women who are emotionally mature, don’t expect us to read their minds, women who express their complaints with what they would like you to do differently and why, women who can communicate clearly and fairly, women who put family first, women who are fair and argue without insults/silent treatment/contempt, etc.

Being a good mate, for any gender, is actually really fukking hard. Most people suck at it which is why so many relationships fail. What men are saying here, though, is that being a good mate is deeper than looking good, having your shyt together financially and being good at sex.

Being a good mate, imo, is essentially about having respect for oneself and others and being willing to work with your partner rather than being in competition with them about being right when you encounter disagreement. Not throwing shade btw, just expressing my opinion.

Pos rep. Never did I say that being educated and having a career are the only things that are needed to be a good mate. I would think that as adults, it should go without saying being kind, honest, fair, and loving make people good potential.

I totally agree with you for the record. Every last word...but please don't say what your sentiments are what "the men are saying." It is what YOU'RE saying. If other gentlemen wanted to express this they would have.

 

[Azul]

Let us stay on topic. Dude made an assumption about me. My response was not an indictment on being a Black American especially since I am also a Black American (considering I was born and raised here).

Ya'll know what I meant, and like I said...I don't engage in "African vs. AA" wars so if your response isn't germane leave it on the side of the road.

 

[Guess Who]

Pos rep. Never did I say that being educated and having a career are the only things that are needed to be a good mate. I would think that as adults, it should go without saying being kind, honest, fair, and loving make people good potential.

I totally agree with you for the record. Every last word...but please don't say what your sentiments are what "the men are saying." It is what YOU'RE saying. If other gentlemen wanted to express this they would have.

Word. That’s fair. I hear you. I didn’t read the whole thread by the way so it’s fair to say I was operating partly based on assumptions. S’all good though. Just trying to spread love on a Monday morning.

 

[SheWantTheD]

What happened to women standing together?

 

[onthereal]

Typical woman - doesn't think before she speaks.

 

[Rell Lauren]

And the nail was hit on the head regarding the difference between Black women and White/Asian women. They are told to go to college to find their husbands and when they graduate many are already engaged or married. Most of the young women I work are either engaged are married. The older ones are ringless or serial daters because of their careers or other reasons.

 

[Poitier]

Recreational sex, women with higher expectations than previous gens, no fault divorce law

My point was that rings aren't being given out all willy nilly. I think men are less willing and financially able to give legally binding commitment given the types of women out there in 2018, especially the poorer the man is...

 

[IsThatBrothaMouzone?]

What is "wife material" then?

Able to take care of yourself

Nurturing

Strong willed/no pushover

Intelligent

At LEAST equal to your man in domestic skills (messy people go together and clean people go together).

Good self esteem with an ability to self reflect.

Wit/humor

Able to get along with other women - don't trust ladies that only bond with dudes that secretly wanna smash