Captain America: Civil War (Official Thread)

[Dr. Narcisse]

Breh I already knew the movie was going to be good but you the same nikka that gave AOU 5 out of 5 so your review is

Nah I don't think thats right fam.


8/10 though. I'll take it.

 

[eMDee92i]

Spoiler: Answer this Breh "

How was T'Chaka's death handled and how was T'Challa and T'Chaka's relationship within the movie leading up to his death? Is T'Challa crowned King during the movie or is he still only Prince?

Spoiler

You only get to see a glimpse at their relationship before T'Chaka gets murked, but you can tell it's some real father/son love, shyt was dope. T'Challa becomes king as soon as his pops is dead. Ain't no big coronation ceremony though (it wouldnt make sense in the movie, he's just hellbent on revenge)

Did Panther c00n it up at any point in the movie?

Was he the best character?

Do you seem him having a huge fan base by the time his solo movie come out?

No c00nin at all, he only serves the interests of his country. Best character to me cause I'm a fan, but they were all great. But I'm really impressed at how they managed to introduce Spidey AND T'Challa in the same movie in the midst of all the shyt going on, and it makes perfect sense.
I definitely think people gonna want to see this BP movie sooner than predicted.

 

[TheGodling]

I don't know why I was mentioned but I ain't reading all that shyt

Well, your name is saysumthinfunnymike and it's a Marvel movie so every two minutes someone definitely says sumthin funny so I figured...

 

[BelieveBeOK]

Smallest spoiler

Spoiler

I'd smash Aunt May in this movie. They made that bih a legit milf

Spoiler

Aunt May



My baby, Zendaya



Ironman set to make an appearance


No Andrew Garfield



That solo Spiderman film is gonna be lit

 

[SmarkMero]

 

[The axe murderer]

Capfun Funmerica: Civil Fun​

@FlyRy @MartyMcFly @HHR @wire28 @Prodigal Syndicate @Nature Boy Ric Flair @hexagram23 @Kill Dat Noize @saysumthinfunnymike @Ain't That Something @Still FloW @Mr. Negative @Jello Biafra @obarth @g-ice

Disclaimer: Outside of some specific plot details, this review may or may not have been pre-written two months in advance. Because let's be honest, we all already knew that Marvel was going to kill this shyt because Marvel is leading the way into a Marvelous future of blockbuster entertainment. Hail Hydra and all praise to my Disney-supported bank account.

For what it's worth, "fun" wasn't the first word I thought of when the credits started rolling on this movie, the word that seems to have gotten a weird kind of negative intonation because critics use it so often. The correct word is actually "funtastic", because the movie is fun and fantastic at the same damn time. A strong continuation on The Winter Soldier, it has all of that movie's strengths in hard hitting action sequences, a genuine and honest conflict and once again pushing the levels of how incredible it is to see all your favorite superheroes, as well as a bunch of B/C and D-listers you never even cared about, being used to perfection. I've always maintained the biggest (unappreciated) strength of the Avengers flicks is that they let every member of the team show out, but in the big brawl that forms the centerpiece of the movie, it takes on a whole new form (in one case even literally). Everybody gets their due, everybody's taking names. And speaking of...

Unilaterally I feel safe to say the whole world will agree that Spider-Man and T'Challa are the show stealers here. Spider-Man's screen time is limited but if there's one thing I can say about it, it's that Tom Holland is Peter Parker. Tom Holland is Spider-Man. Andrew Garfield can go eat a dikk and Tobey Maguire can breathe in relief that he got nostalgia backing him up, because their portrayals just became fukking irrelevant. Btw, Marisa Tomei as Aunt May? fukk yes. fukk yes. fukk yes. Of course everybody's screaming right now 'But what about T'Challa?! What about Black Panther and black excellence?'. Before I get to that, let me just acknowledge Marisa Tomei as Aunt May one more time. fukk my dikk yes. Now Black Panther? He's the fukking man. He's black excellence personified so hard it's funkadelic. But that's the only time you'll hear me mention 'fun' in reference to his role because he's all about his fukking business. White men cracking jokes? fukk that, it's Black Panther triple kick in your face time. It's Black Panther let me drop five stories and land on my feet soft while you white boys are turning purple from all the bruises you collect tumbling down the stairs time. Black Panther is the king and the gawd, and he isn't just for the black people. He's for all the people. Nothing else needs to be said. He's kicking ass for me and he's kicking ass for you.

'Now @TheGodling, surely it can't all be sunshine and rainbows in Marvel land either?' Of course not, because you can't have rainbows without the rain and that's a fact, Jack! In the early goings of the movie things are a bit too choppy. It isn't BvS bad but I think the first fifteen minutes you go from an early 90s flashback to a modern day action scene to a flashback of Tony's youth he's having in the present and it just takes a while before the flow gets going. Also, some of the early fight scenes have more shaky cam in them than I dig. They're still awesome but they're a bit harder to follow than The Winter Soldier's action scenes. I've read complaints about how Zemo is yet an underwhelming villain but honestly, he is just a catalyst and his use as such is good enough since the heart of the flick is Steve vs Tony. If you really want to talk about an underwhelming and underused villain, Crossbones got it far worse in this. That one actually kinda pissed me off. And for what its worth, while the conflict ends on a dramatic note, in typical blockbuster fashion they kinda cop out of it about five minutes later. Of course they sorta have too, Infinity War is coming and all but it wouldn't have hurt letting the conflict breathe a little. There's some other minor stuff but most of that is small details or involve too much spoilers to get into now, but in the end there's nothing bad enough going on to stop the Marvel train anytime soon.

Final rating:

/5

Fun facts (see what I did there?)

1. Did you know that if you take the first letter of each of the three paragraphs of this review, it spells out the word 'fun'?

2. Did you know that if you take the last letter of each of the three paragraphs of this review, it also spells out the word 'fun'?

3. Did you know that if the previous two fun facts made you kinda mad, you may need to go see a doctor about your unusually high saltine levels?

Cosign this review
Saw the movie and Black Panther bodied the role
Wakanda coming for the box office

 

[The_King_of_Everything]

 

[EnzoG]

Cosign this review
Saw the movie and Black Panther bodied the role
Wakanda coming for the box office

how sadistic .....

 

[joeychizzle]

Spoiler

Aunt May



My baby, Zendaya



Ironman set to make an appearance


No Andrew Garfield



That solo Spiderman film is gonna be lit

Spoiler

lol when I realized it was aunt may I was like fukk Spider-Man what that hoe sayin

Andrew Garfield was a little too smooth to truly be Spider-Man tbh
you need some full on bytchmade geek or some soft kid, and this new one fits the bill nicely
Spider-Man with iron man gonna be ultra lit
if anyone was gonna boycott it due to there being YET ANOTHER new Spider-Man, ain't nobody boycotting it now

 

[Bryan Danielson]

 

[Bruce Wayne]

...ANOTHER WEEK.

 

[BelieveBeOK]

...ANOTHER WEEK.

I'll be watching it tomorrow




For the second time

 

[BobbyBooshay]

Midnight showing 2nite

 

[BobbyBooshay]

...ANOTHER WEEK.

Even places like Cambodia, Kazakhstan and Latvia all get it before you Yanks.

 

[Jax]

Spidermam voice doesn't sound right.