Candace Cameron Bure Defends Her "Submissive Role" With Husband: "I Want Him to Lead"

[el_oh_el]

It means exactly what it means. Stop p*ssy footing around it. It means that the man is the head of the household. And if your husband puts his foot down on a matter, you should respect it as his wife. Because you married this man, you should have enough respect for him to let him take on this role when need be. A good husband will not be a dictator. A good husband will not bully you. A good husband will always take his wife's feelings into consideration. A good husband will not be yelling out commands every day. For some reason, this is what women think when they hear "submissive".


Say a man and his family live in one city. The man gets a job offer in another state. The man earns $80K in the old city. This new job will pay him $130K. The wife doesn't want to go, doesn't want to leave her home, doesn't want to uproot the kids from school. The man consults with her then says we're moving Is that him being an evil dictator or is that a husband doing what he thinks is beneficial for his family in the long run?

Good example to dissect.
He may not be being "evil" per say, but he is being a dictator and acting in self interest disguised as otherwise. You forget that money is not everything. Whos to say that uprooting those children from friends and family and dropping them in a foreign environment will be the best decision? That is something that should be agreed upon between both parties, not forced.

 

[No_bammer_weed]

It means exactly what it means. Stop p*ssy footing around it. It means that the man is the head of the household. And if your husband puts his foot down on a matter, you should respect it as his wife. Because you married this man, you should have enough respect for him to let him take on this role when need be. A good husband will not be a dictator. A good husband will not bully you. A good husband will always take his wife's feelings into consideration. A good husband will not be yelling out commands every day. For some reason, this is what women think when they hear "submissive".


Say a man and his family live in one city. The man gets a job offer in another state. The man earns $80K in the old city. This new job will pay him $130K. The wife doesn't want to go, doesn't want to leave her home, doesn't want to uproot the kids from school. The man consults with her then says we're moving Is that him being an evil dictator or is that a husband doing what he thinks is beneficial for his family in the long run?

You leveraged your hypothetical to my disadvantage. a 50k a year difference in salary is significant, and it appears on surface that the wife is being emotional, unreasonable, and not looking at the bigger picture.

Now try this....what if the man was making a major decision such as the one you posed, in which the wife had a strong inclination (because of some a priori knowledge greater than he), that the move and job switch could be financially ruinous and overall detrimental to the family. A "submissive" woman is just going to go along for the sake of obedience and hope for the best, but not because his decision making is sound, and merits that authority.

You are free to create the household of your choosing with a willing partner, but I find the idea of living with a docile, unthinking, spineless wife to be as unappealing as anything.

 

[AquaCityBoy]

yes sir. dudes in here need to take notice of the KIND of men who are being "submitted to" with ease as well. like attracts like. righteous dude attracts righteous chick 9/10.

Bure is a devout christian along with Candice...despite being a hockey player and having puckbunnies throw p*ssy at him on the daily back in the day.... he's always been know as being an upstanding and loyal dude who puts his family above all. any woman worth her weight in gold would be HONORED to get behind THAT and submit to a man who can exercise such discipline and self control.

i'm about as conservative in my relationship as it gets.my husband barks...... i jump. he runs the home...bills...family ...you name it. as a proudly traditional woman i can say this.... if you dudes in here really think you're gonna run around "smashing" everything in site like y'all like to fantasize about till your 40... wearing being a manwhore as some kind of badge of honor and then suddenly try to lock down a loyal submissive wife that's honored to let you lead you need to think again. most of us won't be checking for you or will already be off the market. you've got to BE what you want to attract. let that marinate for a min.

Bed wench.

 

[tru_m.a.c]

*smh* I can tell you guys never have real intellectual discourse involving real life situations

It means exactly what it means. Stop p*ssy footing around it. It means that the man is the head of the household. And if your husband puts his foot down on a matter, you should respect it as his wife. Because you married this man, you should have enough respect for him to let him take on this role when need be.

All fluff no substance. And this shows your wife is obedient.

A good husband will not be a dictator. A good husband will not bully you. A good husband will always take his wife's feelings into consideration. A good husband will not be yelling out commands every day. For some reason, this is what women think when they hear "submissive".

More chest beating. More fluff.

Say a man and his family live in one city. The man gets a job offer in another state. The man earns $80K in the old city. This new job will pay him $130K. The wife doesn't want to go, doesn't want to leave her home, doesn't want to uproot the kids from school. The man consults with her then says we're moving Is that him being an evil dictator or is that a husband doing what he thinks is beneficial for his family in the long run?

this is your hypothetical scenario of a man being a leader??? this is the "matter" you alluded to in the beginning

The only reason you're okay with the decision is because the man is making excessively more money in the new area. You're displaying real ignorance by totaling dismissing how difficult it is to find a new house, sell your house for market value, decide on an appropriate school zone for your children etc. You made this situation up because it shows a man making more money and a man making a decision with authority. You didn't even ATTEMPT to display that the man used a system of logic to make the move. Hyper masculinity. You want an obedient woman who strokes your ego. You don't want a wife.

A family moving is a household decision. The man does not hold the final say in it as the decision affects all parties involved. Unless the wife is trying to stay for superficial reasons, the man's only power is persuasion. For one, you're not moving to a new city by yourself. Secondly, you're not taking the kids by yourself. This is why many consultants (and I'm one) decide to switch jobs or force their org to find them clients in their hometown area.

That's why its called COMPROMISING AND NOT SUBMISSION.

If you don't know the word, you can't think the thought - my 10th grade english teacher

 

[Malik]

You leveraged your hypothetical to my disadvantage. a 50k a year difference in salary is significant, and it appears on surface that the wife is being emotional, unreasonable, and not looking at the bigger picture.

Now try this....what if the man was making a major decision such as the one you posed, in which the wife had a strong inclination (because of some a priori knowledge greater than he), that the move and job switch could be financially ruinous and overall detrimental to the family. A "submissive" woman is just going to go along for the sake of obedience and hope for the best, but not because his decision making is sound, and merits that authority.

You are free to create the household of your choosing with a willing partner, but I find the idea of living with a docile, unthinking, spineless wife to be as unappealing as anything.

If it was me in that situation, me and my wife would talk and if she had those feelings, she could explain it to me then. Being submissive doesn't mean she's stupid and it doesn't mean that when she voices her concerns, I won't listen to her. If she makes really good sense about something, Imma listen to her.


My argument is that what if this decision was the right one...........and the only problem is that the wife does not want to leave. She just doesn't want to go. You live in Philadelphia but the job is in Houston. My family would just have to learn to like Texas

 

[Malik]

*smh* I can tell you guys never have real intellectual discourse involving real life situations



All fluff no substance. And this shows your wife is obedient.



More chest beating. More fluff.



this is your hypothetical scenario of a man being a leader??? this is the "matter" you alluded to in the beginning

The only reason you're okay with the decision is because the man is making excessively more money in the new area. You're displaying real ignorance by totaling dismissing how difficult it is to find a new house, sell your house for market value, decide on an appropriate school zone for your children etc. You made this situation up because it shows a man making more money and a man making a decision with authority. You didn't even ATTEMPT to display that the man used a system of logic to make the move. Hyper masculinity. You want an obedient woman who strokes your ego. You don't want a wife.

A family moving is a household decision. The man does not hold the final say in it as the decision affects all parties involved. Unless the wife is trying to stay for superficial reasons, the man's only power is persuasion. For one, you're not moving to a new city by yourself. Secondly, you're not taking the kids by yourself. This is why many consultants (and I'm one) decide to switch jobs or force their org to find them clients in their hometown area.

That's why its called COMPROMISING AND NOT SUBMISSION.

If you don't know the word, you can't think the thought - my 10th grade english teacher

I chose this scenario because this exact situation comes up.......ALOT

In fact there was a thread today about this very subject

http://www.thecoli.com/threads/relocating-your-family-for-a-job.179920/

I could be real ill right now like you tried to be with me but, I'mma just say you're entitled to your opinion nikka.

 

[blackslash]

Now this is a women....if u wife any women who doesnt think like this...

You lost period.

No I mean you seriously lost in an unimaginable way

 

[tru_m.a.c]

I chose this scenario because this exact situation comes up.......ALOT

In fact there was a thread today about this very subject

http://www.thecoli.com/threads/relocating-your-family-for-a-job.179920/

I could be real ill right now like you tried to be with me but, I'mma just say you're entitled to your opinion.

I just said the situation comes up a lot. I said your 50k jump in salary does not.

 

[blackslash]

yes sir. dudes in here need to take notice of the KIND of men who are being "submitted to" with ease as well. like attracts like. righteous dude attracts righteous chick 9/10.

Bure is a devout christian along with Candice...despite being a hockey player and having puckbunnies throw p*ssy at him on the daily back in the day.... he's always been know as being an upstanding and loyal dude who puts his family above all. any woman worth her weight in gold would be HONORED to get behind THAT and submit to a man who can exercise such discipline and self control.

i'm about as conservative in my relationship as it gets.my husband barks...... i jump. he runs the home...bills...family ...you name it. as a proudly traditional woman i can say this.... if you dudes in here really think you're gonna run around "smashing" everything in site like y'all like to fantasize about till your 40... wearing being a manwhore as some kind of badge of honor and then suddenly try to lock down a loyal submissive wife that's honored to let you lead you need to think again. most of us won't be checking for you or will already be off the market. you've got to BE what you want to attract. let that marinate for a min.

We have such wise women on the coli

 

[blackslash]

*reading this thread*

No wonder the black family unit is in shambles

ol "gender roles dnt exist " ass women gon be the end of us

 

[AquaCityBoy]

What if the man was already making 130K at his current job but wanted to move to a new city to take an 80K job because it was his "dream job"?

 

[Malik]

I just said the situation comes up a lot. I said your 50k jump in salary does not.

Who cares? The number doesn't matter. Make it whatever you want. You wanted people to give you an example. To put things into black and white. I gave you one that happens everyday. You tried to clown, which is funny considering other people thought it was a good example.

Whatever, b.

 

[Malik]

What if the man was already making 130K at his current job but wanted to move to a new city to take an 80K job because it was his "dream job"?

That's a bit different

 

[bsmooth]

It's one thing to disagree with her viewpoint but stop acting like she's advocating a role where women stay in broom closets simply waiting on their husbands commands

 

[tru_m.a.c]

Who cares? The number doesn't matter. Make it whatever you want. You wanted people to give you an example. To put things into black and white. I gave you one that happens everyday. You tried to clown, which is funny considering other people thought it was a good example.

Whatever, b.

Nobody thought it was a good example. Bammer called you out on it too.

Again, your example showed how skewed and biased your opinion of the males authority really is. That's not an example that comes down to "we go or we don't go." As my post clearly pointed out, its a decision that takes a series of logical assessments - NONE of which were present in your writing.

A man saying "we're moving, *insert you fukked up* pic" is the perfect embodiment of a dictator. Which is exactly what you were trying NOT to prove.

Do you understand anything that I'm saying?