Black dads outperform other fathers groups so where does the absentee father myth come from?

[tuckgod]

That myth comes from black men and women raised in the 70s - 90s when it was very common for black fathers to not be around.

As a cat that spent from '08 to '18 working in public schools and with families in their homes, I have much respect for these young dads today.

I don't have stats on hand, but these young dads seem to be way more involved then the dads when I was coming up.

I grew up in a neighborhood full of kids.

I kinda feel bad that my kids couldn't experience the same type of childhood I had because we had FUN every day.

It was a million kids all outside at all times doing all types of shyt.

But, out of all the kids I grew up with, I didn't know one that had an active father in their lives.

I knew their uncles, I could name some of their mama's "friends", but I really couldn't tell you the name of the father of any kid I grew up with, and that's beyond sad.

I grew up in low income housing where you'd lose your lease if the dad lived there too, but I didn't even know many kids whose dad came around sometimes.

They was all absent.

 

[Anerdyblackguy]

How many kids you got? And how many of your childhood friends have kids?

Kids I have none.

My friends
-Cory ( one)
-My boy George ( one)
-My friend Jefferey ( two)

 

[im_sleep]

That myth comes from black men and women raised in the 70s - 90s when it was very common for black fathers to not be around.

As a cat that spent from '08 to '18 working in public schools and with families in their homes, I have much respect for these young dads today.

I don't have stats on hand, but these young dads seem to be way more involved then the dads when I was coming up.

I grew up in a neighborhood full of kids.

I kinda feel bad that my kids couldn't experience the same type of childhood I had because we had FUN every day.

It was a million kids all outside at all times doing all types of shyt.

But, out of all the kids I grew up with, I didn't know one that had an active father in their lives.

I grew up in low income housing where you'd lose your lease if the dad lived there too, but I didn't even know many kids whose dad came around sometimes.

They was all absent.

Yeah I can definitely see this being a generational thing.

I was the only kid on my block that had my dad(he raised me) actively in my life. Only kid on one whole side of my fam.

I don’t know any deadbeats in my age group(over 30) personally, the only ones who don’t see their kids at all are locked up, but nothing where they’re straight up abandoning responsibility.

Now actually living in the same household is an issue that hasn’t changed unfortunately.

 

[mag357]

That myth comes from black men and women raised in the 70s - 90s when it was very common for black fathers to not be around.

As a cat that spent from '08 to '18 working in public schools and with families in their homes, I have much respect for these young dads today.

I don't have stats on hand, but these young dads seem to be way more involved then the dads when I was coming up.

I grew up in a neighborhood full of kids.

I kinda feel bad that my kids couldn't experience the same type of childhood I had because we had FUN every day.

It was a million kids all outside at all times doing all types of shyt.

But, out of all the kids I grew up with, I didn't know one that had an active father in their lives.

I grew up in low income housing where you'd lose your lease if the dad lived there too, but I didn't even know many kids whose dad came around sometimes.

They was all absent.

U know what's funny bruh...
I've notice that too. But theres something that goes along with that....
Most of us that are posting are coming from back in the 80's and the crack epidemic...
So yes, fathers were definitely not around...
These new fathers are around with their kids... but these niggsz are bums. Living off the females who are going to school and working...
This shyt is the craziest thing I've ever seen.
Females are having kids with no good nikkaz, and are basically taking care of 2 kids...
The child and that nikka....
Hes just there to watch the child while shes taking classes and working smh

 

[Charlie Hustle]

How many kids you got? And where do you live? I expect your deflection or non answer before 8 PM central

This ain’t 21 questions

I have no kids and I’m in my 30s. The CDC has data that indicates black men are more involved than any other race. Also the data from the CDC and the census bureau is skewed which makes the data subject to interpretation if you’re using so called single parent households as an metric for parental involvement.

 

[BlaqkSpliffin]

I hear this all the time, but when I was younger having a father around was rare.

This is the truth. There was a good couple decades where black men didn't raise their kids. Whether that was do to systemic reasons or just not wanting to is unclear but it was a reality for MANY black people. I think back to Chris Rock and how he said he was one of the only people in his neighborhood with a father around. DL Hughley said the same shyt. Tupac has an speech on Youtube where he talks about how so many BM where raised by the pimps and drug dealers in the neighborhood because their fathers weren't there and how that shaped their perceptions of the world. What's happened is that a lot of BM grew up without their fathers and when they became adults they swore they would never abandon their kids like they were abandoned. BM are just doing alot better than the previous generation in regards to raising they children.

 

[Dirty Mcdrawz]

Not in living in the same household =/= absentee father

 

[BlaqkSpliffin]

actually that same stat has been cited by Black scholars as FACT.Including Professor Sandy Darrity

here




https://socialequity.duke.edu/sites/socialequity.duke.edu/files/site-images/FINAL COMPLETE REPORT_.pdf

As you can read for yourself, Dr Darity and his colleagues cite the ACTUAL stats. They don't refute the numbers, but they refute the correlation between that and the wealth disparity between races and ethnicities.

Unscientifically, many of those who commented here are confirming the same stat.

Are we all a waste of your time because we disagree?

Their wrong to a degree about the shortage of marriageable BM but beside that I see where they're going.

 

[MoveForward]

Out perform other fathers in everything except what counts? TANGIBLES: Leaving resources for their kids to build with?

I know a guy, a bum, hasn't had a job in 20 years. Has 3 daughters, like 16, 11, and 4. He's pretty good at that stuff listed such as spending time, but time doesn't pay Bill's or put food on the table and clothes on the back. Which are necessities in this world.

Brehs be honest...

Then you get accused of being selfish, greedy, and an absent father. Michelle Obama said something along the lines of being a single mother while Barack was in office.

 

[tuckgod]

U know what's funny bruh...
I've notice that too. But theres something that goes along with that....
Most of us that are posting are coming from back in the 80's and the crack epidemic...
So yes, fathers were definitely not around...
These new fathers are around with their kids... but these niggsz are bums. Living off the females who are going to school and working...
This shyt is the craziest thing I've ever seen.
Females are having kids with no good nikkaz, and are basically taking care of 2 kids...
The child and that nikka....
Hes just there to watch the child while shes taking classes and working smh

Yeah, you're right.

I had quite a few nikkas I associated with during my travels in my early 20s that was basically homeless, but they had a stable of at least 3-4 chicks (some was their baby's moms, some was just regular working chicks with seeds by another nikka looking for steady dikk).

Them nikkas ain't kick in on nothing as far as I could tell (even though they was "hustlas"), and treated the chicks like shyt, but they always had a place to go when they wanted to grab something to eat or get some sleep, and they just stashed all their belongings amongst all the bytches cribs.

We really set a bad example for these youngins growing up today and then we wonder why a lot of them are the way that they are.

 

[ThatTruth777]

the usual suspects

 

[Samori Toure]

Not a myth.

The fact that many Black men abandon their families. or are not in the same household ,doesn't mean that there aren't great Black fathers out there.

Miss me with the revisionist cheerleading this Friday, fellas

Abandon their families or is the issue really about mothers blocking the fathers from the children because the mothers and fathers are no longer together? Because I am of the opinion that custodial issues and parental interference is much more common than abandonment.

 

[Suleiman Bey]

Nikka are you fukking retarted? Black fathers STATISTICALLY spend more time with their kids and raise them.

Statistically? WTF? Them nikkas who took the survey were probably liars or the exceptions. Growing up I knew like 4 people with dads in the house and they were shiit heads.. Playing with the kids I agree. nikkas dads would play ball with us and shiit. Cuz well wasn't like they were at work or anything.

 

[tuckgod]

What's happened is that a lot of BM grew up without their fathers and when they became adults they swore they would never abandon their kids like they were abandoned.

Breh.........

It was a gift and a curse that my father wasn't around, because I really couldn't tell you I'd be the same type of dad that I am for my children if he was.

My sole motivation for trying to be the best father I could possibly be is because I know first hand what it's like to be a child, especially a black child, growing up in America without a dad, and I would NEVER put that on my kids.

 

[Charlie Hustle]

Then you get accused of being selfish, greedy, and an absent father. Michelle Obama said something along the lines of being a single mother while Barack was in office.

On that note, it’s time for me to go back to JBO