Bedwench Article: Racism On Dating Apps Made Me Regret Trying Tinder & Bumble At All — Here's Why
- Thread starter Sonic Boom of the South
- Start date
When these dumb wenches and bucks learn we all we got. That they sit in the average range, so if they're willing to lower their standards with cacs and shyt.
Simply do that with your own and shyt can get better.
Simply do that with your own and shyt can get better.
Scustin Bieburr
Baby baybee baybee UUUGH
It boils down to the same problem that many women across race keep running into in the west. They really are raised to think that their love or interest can make a man change for them. Women are told that if they want a man badly enough, he'll want her back. It's the same system that produces thirsty and delusional men and Simps. People believe sustained effort is enough to wear someone down and make them love them. At best it leads to a flimsy relationship with cheating and disrespect and at worst it just results in being ignored and harshly rejected.
Non white women really believe that white men can change for them. They may start out saying insensitive things but then will eventually become their white knights. Its tragic like a bird with a broken wing trying to fly only to keep falling over and over again
Articles like this are just made when the author has to meet a deadline with SOMETHING. ANYTHING. And so they make a "water is wet" type article. White men are racist? And they disrespect black women in person and online?
MischievousMonkey
Gor bu dëgër
I don't know breh. Several black women told me they legit felt a little hurt when they saw a black man with other races. You can debate whether or not it's rational but this "loyalty" is a thing to some people.
Let’s be real we never had the power to control what black women do in America so we don’t even get upset when sista date out. The issue most of us have is the hypocrisy Sista show when it comes to interracial dating.
Any woman that dates out is selling out.
Do you feel the same way when a man dates out as well?
philmonroe
Superstar
You don't know but I definitely do. Them several black women are money chasing chicks. They only felt hurt when some famous nikka was with another race. Their insecure ass think that if MBJ with a non black it makes them unattractive for some strange reason. Truth is they didn't even have a shot at him because of other more realistic reasons anyway. Don't pay attention to these birds fam when these chicks talking about some ugly and or average dude getting with a non black chick a little hurt? I never see that and doubt you do either. Their loyalty is to $$$$$ please believe it.
No, this doesn't fly with either. Dating out is a conscious decision. Why can't people just own it? People need to stop pretending not to see race as a way to dodge responsibility for their decisions.
What you meant to say is that some people date out because they're indifferent to racial politics and ok with the racial status quo, while others date out because they openly put other races on a pedestal above their own.
MischievousMonkey
Gor bu dëgër
Nah breh. They were all happy that I was dating black women, and I'm not famous. That's how the topic usually comes on. My brother was hanging out with his white friend (not his girlfriend) and he also exclusively dates black women. He met a black woman a lil older than him who asked him if the white girl was his gf and she was legit relieved when he said she wasn't. Like she really sighed in relief and said to him "don't do it bro"
She was also shocked to hear he was into darkskinned black women.
You feel me? Ofc there are some hypocrites in the bunch, but I really think a lot of black women, especially in America, want loyalty from black men.
philmonroe
Superstar
I'm just wondering how you can guarantee such without knowing me? Girls might like my height, body, money, sex game, looks, etc more than yours but you know for sure your that dude over someone you know nothing about? That makes no sense and sounds like insecure barking. Why you out here talking about chick babble about finding the right one if you're the man like that? The math isn't adding up my friend.
You're right its over my head because its high flying garbage that sounds like stuff a chick would say Ye shrug.
philmonroe
Superstar
Yes breh. Are you a loser? I'm assuming you're not so again you don't count. That was my point on top of famous/rich people. I didn't explain better in my first post and I'll take the L for that. To make it more clear if you have something going for yourself and or you're attractive they going to want you. If you're some ugly and or bum them same chicks going to say Becky can have him anyway.Nah breh. They were all happy that I was dating black women, and I'm not famous. That's how the topic usually comes on. My brother was hanging out with his white friend (not his girlfriend) and he also exclusively dates black women. He met a black woman a lil older than him who asked him if the white girl was his gf and she was legit relieved when he said she wasn't. Like she really sighed in relief and said to him "don't do it bro"
She was also shocked to hear he was into darkskinned black women.
You feel me? Ofc there are some hypocrites in the bunch, but I really think a lot of black women, especially in America, want loyalty from black men.
That older lady wanted a shot that's why she was relived lol. Let me guess this insecure lady was also DS? I'm going to keep it all the way funky a chick come to me with that you like DS chick I'm turned off straight up. I'm not with that insecure mentality do you talk to DS chicks like Im not black and wouldn't talk to a woman I thought looked good because she was DS. That makes no sense to me and I don't care what the rationale behind it is. I can see if a white chick asked if I talked to them because maybe I'm not into white girls but another black asking me if I'm into black chicks never will sit well with me. Glad I've never had to actually be around inferior thinking folks like that.
I hear what you're saying just think most women on this stuff are hypocrites ime which I will gladly admit is mainly online. I can't be around chicks on this stuff IRL because I'm not with grown folks with overly outward insecurity. That's not a trait I like in women I'm with.
MischievousMonkey
Gor bu dëgër
Whooty Chaser
#PAWGSET
Racism On Dating Apps Made Me Regret Trying Tinder & Bumble At All — Here's Why
When I Tried Dating Apps For The First Time, Men's Racist Comments Drove Me Away
BY SHANELL MCKINNIE
A DAY AGO
For years, I avoided online dating. Why would I subject myself to this vicious cycle of validation and rejection just to get ghosted? Instagram was already doing a great job of satisfying my millennial need for approval. But a few months ago, after a breakup, I turned to Tinder and Bumble as a temporary bandage for my wounded heart (and, let's be honest, ego). After four months of swiping, I found myself worse off mentally than when I began. Were other women having similar experiences with racism on dating apps, and, if so, why wasn't anyone talking about it? I had underestimated the number of racist micro-aggressions that would come my way.
One of my first matches, a guy who had moved from Minnesota to Los Angeles a month earlier, sent me the opening line, “Ever dated a white guy before?” As if white men are somehow a rare demographic. Over the next month, I received at least 10 different variations of that question, each one more maddening than the last.
Some men used a more subtle approach to their internalized racism. There was one conversation, in particular, that was especially disappointing. He was an East Coast native, as well, and the conversation was going great. We had so much in common, and then…it happened. I sent him a selfie, to which he replied, “Damn. You’re so pretty for a black girl.” I couldn’t decide what was more upsetting. Was it the flagrant micro-aggression? Or was it how pleased he seemed to be with what he thought was a unique compliment? He couldn’t understand why his remark triggered eyeball emojis instead of a humble, "Thank you!" Still, I maintained hope.
During a conversation with another guy about immigration at the U.S./Mexico border, he asked what I thought of Black Lives Matter. A little off topic, I thought, but finally! A man who, although he didn’t appear to be a POC, seemed interested in having intellectual discourse with a marginalized member of society. In response, I typed up a detailed reply explaining the movement the best I could. I even included links to think pieces I found relevant to his inquiry. My impassioned reply was met with, “I gotta say, BLM seems pretty toxic to me,” about a minute later. At this point, my patience had been worth thin. I felt like the people I met on dating apps pushed me to answer for and defend an entire race constantly. When I challenged this guy on his opinion, the interaction immediately turned hostile. He said that I was a "somewhat intellectual person" but that I had allowed my opinion on certain issues — like the border wall or the Black Lives Matter movement — to be clouded by identity politics. He told me I should "work on letting race go as an impacting factor." Needless to say, it wasn’t a love connection.
My most disappointing date was with a guy we'll call Josh*. We seemed to hit it off and exchanged numbers after only chatting in the app for a few days. I didn't see any red flags. We both happened to be binge-watchingBrooklyn Nine-Nine and we bonded over our love of Asian cuisine. At Josh’s suggestion, we made plans to have our first date at a local Thai restaurant. Despite a promising start, Josh was not only 15 minutes late, but had, unfortunately, decided that his big opener would be running his hand through my newly-done braids and saying, “Oh, I forgot, I’m not allowed to do that, am I?" I realized the "nice," "chill" guy I had been chatting with online had clearly never had a conversation with a black woman before. And if the underhanded racism wasn’t enough to make me deactivate my account, this guy reminded me that some men still view women in an overly sexualized way. He thought he had license to touch me before our first date even started.
I won’t condemn dating apps entirely, but I now see them as a necessary evil. Encountering this kind of underhanded racism was unnerving, and as a WOC, its imperative for me to take a break from them every now and again. I’ve gained a new appreciation for organic interactions. These days, I’ve been making a conscious effort to spend more time with friends and doing things I genuinely enjoy. I may re-enter the dating app fray someday, but for now, I'm good.
*Name has been changed.
Never went through any of these experiences with pawgs. Bedwenches stay losing.
