Admit simp crimes you've committed

[Alec Baldwin]

I live right next to the biggest army base in the world Fort Hood. Every time those soldiers get deployed, those women are right in the clubs. Every time.

I believe it, the flakiest of my ex's was the one that was the most adamant about being loyal to me when I get deployed. I was at the fact that she actually thought I believed it. To be honest with you though, If i was naive enough to actually believe these broads and come home after x amount of years to find out she was being smutted out, i'd probably be doin a life long bid. I aint a dumbass nikka and I know i'd regret it instantly, but in the heat of the moment? shyt happens

If you joining the army FOR THE LOVE OF GOD GET STATIONED OVERSEAS you will THANK ME LATER The quality over their is you will come back to USA looking at females like Ive seen better

Watch me get sent to afghanistan breh. I heard the broads over there don't even come out at all. You got a better chance finding a unicorn apparently, any truth?

 

[twan83]

I believe it, the flakiest of my ex's was the one that was the most adamant about being loyal to me when I get deployed. I was at the fact that she actually thought I believed it. To be honest with you though, If i was naive enough to actually believe these broads and come home after x amount of years to find out she was being smutted out, i'd probably be doin a life long bid. I aint a dumbass nikka and I know i'd regret it instantly, but in the heat of the moment? shyt happens





Watch me get sent to afghanistan breh. I heard the broads over there don't even come out at all. You got a better chance finding a unicorn apparently, any truth?

Well afghanistan is not a place to have fun but to help protect and train their people and people still fighting over there now.

But what i was saying get stationed like at Germany, Italy, Korea or Japan anywhere overseas just not the places where we are fighting.

I've been to Germany and damnit man they go hard out there them broads plus you could go to RED LIGHT DISTRICT

Italy i was there for 3 yrs now i will say this It seemed overrated for the most part but when you see a True Bad Italian its so beautiful

Japan MY FAVORITE AND MOST MEMORABLE PLACE its mad underrated. If you dont like asians you will when you get there they converted me. its so Wonderful out there and even if you dont end up liking asians. They got BRAZILIANS, RUSSIANS AND AUSTRALIANS AND PHILIPIONS out there tons of em
I had a bad brazilian gf out there. If i wasn't married or had kids I WOULD LIVE THERE TILL I DIE. BETWEEN THE WOMEN, TECHONOLOGY BEING SO FAR ADVANCED AND IM BIG ON ANIME ITS HEAVEN

 

[winb83]

lol yall got me not even wanting to give females a piece of gum.

So what were ya'lls mentality during the time when it came to paying the phone bills and all of that? Ya'll just liked the woman so much that you thought it would get you closer to her?

It's amazing the things you'll do in the name of "love" or caring about someone. If that's your girlfriend supposedly and she needs a car then you're supposed to do what's needed to help your girl. The problem with that whole thing was it was a relationship where she was totally dependent on me and she brought nothing but p*ssy to the table. She actually ended up making me immune to sex as I got fed up with her and decided I'd rather beat off than fukk with a chick like that.

Now I don't really care about getting sex from a chick. It is what I want but it doesn't control my behavior anymore.

 

[lachreyatarbabypits]

Let's see who can top buying a mac book for a chick among other things.

Did you nut in her ear at least?

 

[newworldafro]

when i was a senior in high school i had a crush on this fine ass mixed chick who was only a sophmore. she had just broken up with her boyfriend over christmas break so i decided i was gonna swoop in and get a valentine's day present. i stayed up until 1 a.m. after getting off of work making her a card on MS Paint.

when i gave it to her at school the next day shorty literally cried in my arms!! i just knew i was gonna get some p*ssy. after school, she gave me a ride home along with some other people and out of no where she just broke down crying talking about how she misses her ex and can't believe another girl (a girl who i previously simped on). shorty put her head in her lap and started crying while she was driving!! i had to hold the wheel to keep us alive.

after i finally convinced her to pull over, she called her ex, but she was so hysterical she couldn't talk to him. that's when she pulls out a notepad and starts writing shyt down that she wants me to tell him. i was actually the go-between for this bytch i was trying to smash and her ex. everytime dude saw me for the rest of the year he was like i never hit. she started fukking some freshman whiteboy literally days after it happened.

hilarious and psychologically painful to read

 

[Wesley Pipes quotes]

when i was a senior in high school i had a crush on this fine ass mixed chick who was only a sophmore. she had just broken up with her boyfriend over christmas break so i decided i was gonna swoop in and get a valentine's day present. i stayed up until 1 a.m. after getting off of work making her a card on MS Paint.

when i gave it to her at school the next day shorty literally cried in my arms!! i just knew i was gonna get some p*ssy. after school, she gave me a ride home along with some other people and out of no where she just broke down crying talking about how she misses her ex and can't believe another girl (a girl who i previously simped on). shorty put her head in her lap and started crying while she was driving!! i had to hold the wheel to keep us alive.

after i finally convinced her to pull over, she called her ex, but she was so hysterical she couldn't talk to him. that's when she pulls out a notepad and starts writing shyt down that she wants me to tell him. i was actually the go-between for this bytch i was trying to smash and her ex. everytime dude saw me for the rest of the year he was like i never hit. she started fukking some freshman whiteboy literally days after it happened.

 

[Mr. Pink]

Liggins you're not right in the head, dude. I'm serious, you should really look into some professional counseling or some shyt.

You're the male(and I use that term loosely) equivalent of a bytch who's getting the shyt kicked out of her daily by her thug boyfriend but she still won't leaving him, talking about "deep down he really loves me in his own way".

What's even worse is you do that with every bytch.

 

[Captain Crunch]

Other assorted simp crimes:

- buying birthday presents without knowing if I was gonna get the box or not
- friend zoned by females because of a lack of aggression
- paid a couple of phone bills, it's a 50/50 on the times that I got the box as a result.

Most of my heaviest sipping happened when I was between 16-21 and I feel fortunate that my mind has repressed the memories of so many people I used to know. Being a nice, friendly, good natured doormat gets you nowhere in life. Find your lane and cruise down it, if females are feeling you they will come for the ride. Stop making their feelings and shyt important and just do you.

 

[Rarely-Wrong Liggins]

Liggins you're not right in the head, dude. I'm serious, you should really look into some professional counseling or some shyt.

You're the male(and I use that term loosely) equivalent of a bytch who's getting the shyt kicked out of her daily by her thug boyfriend but she still won't leaving him, talking about "deep down he really loves me in his own way".

What's even worse is you do that with every bytch.

Ooooooh we got a bad ass over here.

I've taken hella Ls but I've won just as many. But this a thread about simping. Not impressing net nikkas.

Liggins did that so hopefully you won't have to go through that.

Sent from my SAMSUNG-SGH-I997 using Tapatalk 2

 

[Gus Money]

While I'm at the computer I guess I'll finish the Plum situation.

So yeah, we were dating a second time and it just wasn't the same. The first time we dated there was a mutual attraction there. This time she was only going to stand being with me as long as she needed to. We still fukked and kicked it. I still spent money. Bought her daughter some shoes and a coat, put food in the house and helped her catch up on bills.

Well, when she was finally caught up, she cut me loose. One day, she had a "miss." Basically that means she missed the shuttle to get downtown and get her own bus so they had to find some other route for her. You get in trouble for misses. So I told her I would wake her up from now on. Next day went good. The day after that I decided to get my haircut before I called. Dude took an hour to cut my hair. I call her and she's at work. We talk but then she's like "What was the point of calling now? I'm here." We got into it and basically she told me don't bother seeing her that day. I had already decided not to but you know women gotta have the last word. After that we didn't talk for a few months but then I texted her and we had a few awkward conversations over a month or so period.

She "accidentally" sent me a couple of texts meant for her cousin and I found out she was still in Houston (she was supposed to move to Dallas in early 2011) and that she was dating someone and she really liked him. When I first text her again she thought I was someone else. She expressed that disappointment to her cousin. My pride was taking fukking body blows. Eventually I just stopped talking to her.

I saw her last fall when I was riding through a transit center. She was posted up talking to another bus driver. She didn't see me though.

And that was that. Dunno what I'd do if I ran into her now. I still feel some kind of way when I think about her. That summer of 2010 was great for me. Never really felt like that with anyone else honestly and that's probably why I put up with her a second time. But you can't bottle lightning twice. I learned the hard way.

That last paragraph hit me hard. This whole story was hard to read.

 

[Mr. Pink]

Ooooooh we got a bad ass over here.

I've taken hella Ls but I've won just as many.

See that doesn't sound right, unless you're a split personality or something. Because a guy who engages in that level of simping, tricking and being a doormat for all manner of bytches isn't the type to simultaneously stack up 'wins'. That's contradictory. A hardcore simp doesn't win, and a winner doesn't do that type of simping.

I'm not saying simping doesn't happen, everyone simps at one time or another especially when young, but judging from your stories you're too far gone to be 'winning'.

Unless your letter writing game suddenly paid off.

 

[Rarely-Wrong Liggins]

See that doesn't sound right, unless you're a split personality or something. Because a guy who engages in that level of simping, tricking and being a doormat for all manner of bytches isn't the type to simultaneously stack up 'wins'. That's contradictory. A hardcore simp doesn't win, and a winner doesn't do that type of simping.

I'm not saying simping doesn't happen, everyone simps at one time or another especially when young, but judging from your stories you're too far gone to be 'winning'.

Unless your letter writing game suddenly paid off.

I ain't ordinary bruh.

Sent from my SAMSUNG-SGH-I997 using Tapatalk 2

 

[shopthatwrecks]

lol yall got me not even wanting to give females a piece of gum.

So what were ya'lls mentality during the time when it came to paying the phone bills and all of that? Ya'll just liked the woman so much that you thought it would get you closer to her?

in my case..a mutual friend n some of her friends was goin out to a bbq..everybody was in couples but her...ol girl do the date shyt...


but she aint the boo'd up ...skippin to rainbows while holdin hands type..she likes her space

so yeah...hit d-town on memorial day weekend..met up with em...saw her n we instantly clicked..

me n her chunked the duece..to the group...follwed her back to her crib...

saw where she stayed..n azure condos downtown..

she gave me the keys to the coochie n i wrecked it..tombout i..put her big ass in the passion propeller..arc de triomph...the pinwheel... dirty dangle

woke up to a feast..

called her thursday to see what she had goin 4 juneteenth..said a friend was throwin a fish fry..said i'll be up there monday...

friday she called upset..tombout she wrecked it..i cupcaked with her..said i got it dont worry about it..

 

[Jesus]

my big bytch i jus met..

jus broke her off a 5 stacks...today...storm came thru dallas this mornin..n she destroyed the front end of her fx35

flew her down today..so she can pick up my truck..so she can have transpo to work..until hers is fixed

while my main bytch..is out of town for fathers day n a family reunion

 

[Jesus]

Maybe give a chick a ride to the store or by a girl a rose for her b-day. You nikkas are some lames.