World premier the Chaucer #GMB saga... (Sponsored by Durex condoms)

[Sonic Boom of the South]

I started fukking hoes from the NATO base
And Navy hoes from the nearby naval station

Hoes was fukking me just cause I was married

I didn't give a fukk

Me and Asia fought everyday then this bytch wanna fuxk


bytch called the police a few times over a fight she started
And I didn't do shyt

Bih stopped smoking
And gained weight
Like she got to 145
Like fine as fukk

This bih still wanted me to talk about fukking kim

Then this bytch say her fantasy is to watch me fukk another bih

This bih create a profile on adult friend finder to get a bih for me to fukk

I didn't even wanna do it

She actually contacted a chick
And set something up but the chick flaked

 

[A1aaa]

Damn OP, hindsight is 20/20, but you were naive and a sucker for love. Could be worse, though... you're alive from the war, no BM drama and presumably no STDs from fukking with that chick.

If were you, I would've reset with those army benefits and moved to Africa or something on some Dave Chappelle shyt.

 

[BuckFilly]

All that’s missing is the pied piper himself to put this fukkery to music

 

[Sonic Boom of the South]

This bih Asia was fukking crazy

bytch would beg me to punish her

Saying she would do anything I wanted
She knew I was fukking other hoes
And asked me to bring them home

But I never would
Out of spite

One day I was watching TV sitting on the floor and this bih walked up naked
Grabbed my face
And made me eat her out

Then this bish squirted/pissed all on my face

From that point on we was fukking and pissing on each other


Sex we'd crazy good

We never had a 3.some

I never let her watch me fukk a bih



I was cool with a few sohh females who knew all the drama

And I was smashing them too

Sometimes making inside jokes on sohh

I even took leave and flew to Michigan and smashed and hung out with 1

 

[Bushmaster]

Damn OP, hindsight is 20/20, but you were naive and a sucker for love. Could be worse, though... you're alive from the war, no BM drama and presumably no STDs from fukking with that chick.

If were you, I would've reset with those army benefits and moved to Africa or something on some Dave Chappelle shyt.

Let him finish breh. U might have to edit your post

 

[Sonic Boom of the South]

Damn OP, hindsight is 20/20, but you were naive and a sucker for love. Could be worse, though... you're alive from the war, no BM drama and presumably no STDs from fukking with that chick.

If were you, I would've reset with those army benefits and moved to Africa or something on some Dave Chappelle shyt.

nikka sucker for love for a child
Not no bih

 

[Bushmaster]

Now it's pissing involved? It's deeper than rap

Even @Rarely-Wrong Liggins read that part like

 

[LiveFromLondon]

So after the condom explosion incident
She put it on me cause she knew I was a good dude
From a good home





After she had the boy
Her ex
Was contacting her
And she wasn't telling me


So the whole time in in Iraq

They talking
And he saying he wished it was his son

And realized he wanted kids

Then she told him it might be his

Boy i tell ya these hoes never cease to amaze

 

[Orange cream shake]

This bih Asia was fukking crazy

bytch would beg me to punish her

Saying she would do anything I wanted
She knew I was fukking other hoes
And asked me to bring them home

But I never would
Out of spite

One day I was watching TV sitting on the floor and this bih walked up naked
Grabbed my face
And made me eat her out

Then this bish squirted/pissed all on my face

From that point on we was fukking and pissing on each other


Sex we'd crazy good

We never had a 3.some

I never let her watch me fukk a bih



I was cool with a few sohh females who knew all the drama

And I was smashing them too

Sometimes making inside jokes on sohh

I even took leave and flew to Michigan and smashed and hung out with 1

What was your username on sohh? I’ve asked you this several times.

 

[CreepyMcCreeperson]

Italy was wonderful with my family
Everywhere we went people were coming up to see the baby and hug us

People were paying for shyt everywhere we went

Time still passed

The war was still going on

The day came for me to go back


Asia drove me back


I had my son in my arms
Tears dropping on my son as I'm crying


As I'm about to put my son back in the car seat


Asia looks at me with tears running down her face then says

Spoiler

Chaucer, I'm scared this might not be your son

All this and you still aint took a paternity test to make sure the son is or isnt yours?

One day after working 1800 to 0600
I drove home
Soon as I get inside my 1SG
Call me

-now my new 1SG is a real bytch ass dude
He dislike me for some reason
My 1SG in my last unit was a late 40s white dude, former Ranger instructor
He was cool and laid back and always looked out for people

My new 1SG was this gump ass late 30s Black dude who looked like Terrell Owens and full c00n
nikka fukked over a lot of people
nikka didn't even have a combat patch

So my 1SG tell me I need to come back and they need to see me

I drive all the way back


They take me to a conference room

I see my commander, 1SG and my wife at the table



1SG looks at me like


Slides me some papers


I see

"paternity results"


My name


My son name



And



0.000000000%


Then the ghost of Maury Povich drifted in the room and said

You are Not the father



My commander looked like



1SG still like



Asia siting her dumb ass like

You should have waited for the paternity test before marriage

 

[stave]

Bih stopped smoking
And gained weight
Like she got to 145
Like fine as fukk

This bih still wanted me to talk about fukking kim

Then this bytch say her fantasy is to watch me fukk another bih

L's turning into W's

almost cheated your way into a winning scenario


but the kids, man














edit: OK pee is involved. I'm out

 

[Megadeus]

Yall pissing in each others faces now? This is where we going with this?

yep, im officially done here. Peace

 

[poppastoppa]

This bih Asia was fukking crazy

bytch would beg me to punish her

Saying she would do anything I wanted
She knew I was fukking other hoes
And asked me to bring them home

But I never would
Out of spite

One day I was watching TV sitting on the floor and this bih walked up naked
Grabbed my face
And made me eat her out

Then this bish squirted/pissed all on my face

From that point on we was fukking and pissing on each other


Sex we'd crazy good

We never had a 3.some

I never let her watch me fukk a bih



I was cool with a few sohh females who knew all the drama

And I was smashing them too

Sometimes making inside jokes on sohh

I even took leave and flew to Michigan and smashed and hung out with 1

Breh bout to wake up with a knife at his throat with this bytch bukkit nekkit on top of him talking bout "If you don't make me cum 6 times, ima slice that big vein right there".

 

[Mordith]

And I was smashing them too

Sometimes making inside jokes on sohh

I even took leave and flew to Michigan and smashed and hung out with 1

Was the bih from Michigan light skinned?

 

[Sonic Boom of the South]

We started hanging out with some people from the unit

Going to clubs n shyt

By that time

I was just riding out my time
Cause I was done

My son calling me by my first name

Dude got lots of custody

I just didn't give a fuxk





This one chick from my unit was fukking everybody
Including the 1SG

And we went out with her and 2 dudes from the unit

We go out get back to her crib really late

Me n my wife on her couch chilling

Getting sleepy
Asia ask if we can rest a lil bit before we leave

So we on the couch
Light low

And these 2 nikkas kissing on the other chick

I'm like he'l nawl

This bish getting naked

I yank Asia ass up and leave