What was some weird/f'd up/awkward sh*t u guys witnessed as a child?

[OPTiMO]

Picking uncles up from jail or the park where they lived

Relatives staying with us bugged out on drugs not letting me watch tv

Me my mom and my sister were living with this abusive dude my mom was with when i was like 7, and we tried to dip and move out while we thought he was at work, even had some of his shyt we were taking, we leaving the house and all of a sudden he comes zooming around the corner and my moms like "go up go up go up" locks us in the room and just hear screaming and shyt.

brother come home leaking like a muthafukker cuz he got the dogshyt beat out of him

getting evicted from multiple places

 

[DerrtySouthpaw]

10 in kindergarten my nikka?

I saw my dad pack up and leave at 3
Mama had a nervous breakdown afterwards
One of ny first memories was of a car accident where we fell off a bridge in a car
pop broke his neck
Found out pop wasnt my pop at 6

yo... WHAT THE fukk. be my nikkas

 

[shopthatwrecks]

road trip with my pops from htown to richmond ca...

a lil bit outside of demings new mexico..near the new mexico arizona boarder...saw purplish burgandy aqua blue lookin lights..


n it got closer n closer to our car...then eventually it was right above us...everything cut off...truck rolled for like 5seconds...n jus stopped...

me n pops quiet as fukk...

popped rolled em a joint...smoked it ...grabbed his jacka subtractor ( glock 40) put it in his lap...locked the doors...n told me dont say shyt..

we sat out there for like 30mins be4 everything came back on...

n he told me if we get pulled over dont say u saw shyt...u had jus woke up...

next thing i know 11 black suvs came flyin behind us n eventually around us in wishbone formation..we pulled over...

they had army guns ....and question my pops had he seen anything weird or lights...he told em nall...he high as et p*ssy right now...

they continued questionin him..n ask me stuff..i played dumb...

n they let us go...


that was the last time we ever drove to cali on i-10

 

[YaThreadFloppedB!]

Everything I ever written on SOHH is all awkward childhood ish:



What if when you was doing pushs up in between park cars at Burger King you saw ya pops tied up naked to a punching bag with chewed on grape Bubblicious covering his eyes and you see West Indian dudes pushing each other mad fast in shopping carts ,taking turns jumping out full speed with ankle weights and piping hot brass knuckles fukking ya pops up, I mean these niqqas made a ramp and everything. Niqqas got their car door open blasting "I'm In Love With A Stripper" and got their banana sandwiches on the car hood so the sun can make them hot, so you scream "Get the fukk off my daddy"!!!!, but they dont see you cause you are at the down part of your push ups and one of them says "Who de fukk seed dat" and you say "Me"!!! So ya pops scream out" Mandy, help before they put more firecrackers in my nostrils"!!!!!! But you see a Free Big Mac coupon and a half drinken Dr.Pepper under one of the cars. What would you do?

More childhood memories


What if you was chillin' walking down the block eating a bag crunchy cheese doodles and chicken fingers when all of a sudden you see a crowd of 79 people in a circle screaming "ooohh" and "look at that bytch titties"!! So you run to see the titties cause you never saw titties before. Soon as you get there you see niqqas watching a hand held DVD player and on the screen it's ya grandmother and your father fighting butt naked on a trampouline, but she wearing some Macho Man Randy Savage shades and some tight beef and broccoli Timbs so no one can know its her. Ya pops dont give a fukk cause he baby oiled up, holding a small pack of fish tank gravel his artifical hand that got blowed off in on Vietnam. Anyway ya pops joint is maaaad hard cause ya grandmoms do go some fat titties, so he tied his doo-rag around it and taped it to the inside of his leg so ya grandmoms cant see his joint. The only time you can see it is when he does a split kick in mid air. So ya grandmoms tried to jump mad high and tie her Timbs in mid-air and all of a sudden Ya pops is shooting this bytch with mad fish tank gravel through a White Castle straw, I mean he straight stinging this bytch legs and back area. So all of a sudden you hear in the background of the video, "Block with you titties, block with your titties!!" It's ya paralyzed Puerto Rican uncle "Little Man" sitting on the porch with no shoes on. So ya pops says "oh yeah, you trying to help niqqa". Next thing you know ya pops takes the whole bag of leftover fishtank gravel and throws that shyt mad fast, he making it rain on ya uncle, shyt sounded like sleet, "Brrraaapppp". Little Man says "aaarrrrggghhh, my eyes" but he cant wipe it cause he paralyzed. So next ya pops smacks this niqqa with a water hose filled with sand "BLAAAAAWWWWIE" and screams "YOU AINT PARALYZED NIQQA!!!" So,you realize that your dikk got hard too from watching ya grandmoms titties, do you keep watching or run home and squeeze one out?

*Bookmarks page*

Yo I cant read this shyt right now...Im in a room full of esteemed people
They cant see me going stupid... not now

 

[YaThreadFloppedB!]

He is my dad. I call em both dad but thankfully they never been around each other. My real dad gives me beer and drinks with me but he has never helped me financially. No c/s, no birthday gifts, none of that. I still love him tho because i dont judge and i could one day be in the same situation.
But he cant compare to my pop, he got me in morehouse, sacrificied his happiness to raise me. I love him and when he died on the surgery table having a quadruple bypass, i almost lost it. Thankfully God said it wasnt his time and they resuscitated him

:sadsoulja: This my nikka. If you hate him then you hate me

 

[Non Sequitur]

Everything I ever written on SOHH is all awkward childhood ish:



What if when you was doing pushs up in between park cars at Burger King you saw ya pops tied up naked to a punching bag with chewed on grape Bubblicious covering his eyes and you see West Indian dudes pushing each other mad fast in shopping carts ,taking turns jumping out full speed with ankle weights and piping hot brass knuckles fukking ya pops up, I mean these niqqas made a ramp and everything. Niqqas got their car door open blasting "I'm In Love With A Stripper" and got their banana sandwiches on the car hood so the sun can make them hot, so you scream "Get the fukk off my daddy"!!!!, but they dont see you cause you are at the down part of your push ups and one of them says "Who de fukk seed dat" and you say "Me"!!! So ya pops scream out" Mandy, help before they put more firecrackers in my nostrils"!!!!!! But you see a Free Big Mac coupon and a half drinken Dr.Pepper under one of the cars. What would you do?

More childhood memories


What if you was chillin' walking down the block eating a bag crunchy cheese doodles and chicken fingers when all of a sudden you see a crowd of 79 people in a circle screaming "ooohh" and "look at that bytch titties"!! So you run to see the titties cause you never saw titties before. Soon as you get there you see niqqas watching a hand held DVD player and on the screen it's ya grandmother and your father fighting butt naked on a trampouline, but she wearing some Macho Man Randy Savage shades and some tight beef and broccoli Timbs so no one can know its her. Ya pops dont give a fukk cause he baby oiled up, holding a small pack of fish tank gravel his artifical hand that got blowed off in on Vietnam. Anyway ya pops joint is maaaad hard cause ya grandmoms do go some fat titties, so he tied his doo-rag around it and taped it to the inside of his leg so ya grandmoms cant see his joint. The only time you can see it is when he does a split kick in mid air. So ya grandmoms tried to jump mad high and tie her Timbs in mid-air and all of a sudden Ya pops is shooting this bytch with mad fish tank gravel through a White Castle straw, I mean he straight stinging this bytch legs and back area. So all of a sudden you hear in the background of the video, "Block with you titties, block with your titties!!" It's ya paralyzed Puerto Rican uncle "Little Man" sitting on the porch with no shoes on. So ya pops says "oh yeah, you trying to help niqqa". Next thing you know ya pops takes the whole bag of leftover fishtank gravel and throws that shyt mad fast, he making it rain on ya uncle, shyt sounded like sleet, "Brrraaapppp". Little Man says "aaarrrrggghhh, my eyes" but he cant wipe it cause he paralyzed. So next ya pops smacks this niqqa with a water hose filled with sand "BLAAAAAWWWWIE" and screams "YOU AINT PARALYZED NIQQA!!!" So,you realize that your dikk got hard too from watching ya grandmoms titties, do you keep watching or run home and squeeze one out?

 

[MouseTeeth]

My father hung himself when i was 19. I was in Miami at the time for school. He was livin with a woman he was dating in CT....she found him. Thank God i didnt see that shyt or find him like that. Apparently he downed a bottle of tequila before he did it. He never left a suicide note, but made a video, kinda fitting i guess bc he worked in television. I have the video but I've never watched it and probably never will.

 

[Thatrogueassdiaz]

When I was around 7 or so I saw a little girl who had a penis. I was in daycare. Everyone was in-line to use the bathroom. Some 3 year old girl walked out of the bathroom with her pullup around her knees and a tiny penis dangling between her legs. I've gone over that image a thousand times and I've come to the conclusion that I saw a transsexual. It could have very well Been a boy and I was just confused as a child, but I'm pretty certain she had a girl's face.

Sent from my SCH-I535 using Tapatalk 2

 

[Cat piss martini]

had a heroin dealer who lived maybe 5 doors
down when i was like 9.......
bed was near the window so i'd sit up and
listen to my jvc boombox and look out the window.
one night I see two cats go up in the heroin dealers
crib........next morning they are pulling him and his chick
out of the crib and both were tied up and tortured to death.
for years i'd see the two cats who went in that night
on the lanes drinking beer and i'd be scared to death.
didnt really feel safe until they were both murdered years later.
Ive seen alot of shyt but that still fukks with me sometime.

 

[Ooh Marty]

When I was around 7 or so I saw a little girl who had a penis. I was in daycare. Everyone was in-line to use the bathroom. Some 3 year old girl walked out of the bathroom with her pullup around her knees and a tiny penis dangling between her legs. I've gone over that image a thousand times and I've come to the conclusion that I saw a transsexual. It could have very well Been a boy and I was just confused as a child, but I'm pretty certain she had a girl's face.

Sent from my SCH-I535 using Tapatalk 2

I know I shouldnt laugh but

 

[Ooh Marty]

road trip with my pops from htown to richmond ca...

a lil bit outside of demings new mexico..near the new mexico arizona boarder...saw purplish burgandy aqua blue lookin lights..


n it got closer n closer to our car...then eventually it was right above us...everything cut off...truck rolled for like 5seconds...n jus stopped...

me n pops quiet as fukk...

popped rolled em a joint...smoked it ...grabbed his jacka subtractor ( glock 40) put it in his lap...locked the doors...n told me dont say shyt..

we sat out there for like 30mins be4 everything came back on...

n he told me if we get pulled over dont say u saw shyt...u had jus woke up...

next thing i know 11 black suvs came flyin behind us n eventually around us in wishbone formation..we pulled over...

they had army guns ....and question my pops had he seen anything weird or lights...he told em nall...he high as et p*ssy right now...

they continued questionin him..n ask me stuff..i played dumb...

n they let us go...


that was the last time we ever drove to cali on i-10

Yall saw UFOS?

 

[AZBeauty]

When I was 10 I spent the night over a friends house. The next day her dad was taking me home and got into a high speed chase. Evidently the dad got high and owed someone drug money or something. They start chasing him...we jump in the back (it was a old school station wagon) Finally he pulls over...they beat his ass. When I say they beat him, they beat him...afterwards I saw the imprint of the bottom of their shoes on his back. Anyway...as he dropped me off at home he drove off so fast that he slammed my finger in the door. I went upstairs crying with a bloody finger. My daddy put me in the car and drove right back to their house. As soon as the man pulled up my daddy punched him in right in face and laid him out on the street. Funniest shyt I ever seen.

 

[cleanface coney]

i seen my momma old bf put a nikka to sleep at the gastation he knew the nikka tho

my cousin fukkin his stepsister me n my other cuz was young
he woke us up in the middle of the night
like yall nikkas aint gettin no p*ssy watch this lol
shyt was crazy she was callin him daddy n shyt
im like this yo stepbrother lol

a shapeshifter but i sid that before on here

 

[AZBeauty]

Everything I ever written on SOHH is all awkward childhood ish:



What if when you was doing pushs up in between park cars at Burger King you saw ya pops tied up naked to a punching bag with chewed on grape Bubblicious covering his eyes and you see West Indian dudes pushing each other mad fast in shopping carts ,taking turns jumping out full speed with ankle weights and piping hot brass knuckles fukking ya pops up, I mean these niqqas made a ramp and everything. Niqqas got their car door open blasting "I'm In Love With A Stripper" and got their banana sandwiches on the car hood so the sun can make them hot, so you scream "Get the fukk off my daddy"!!!!, but they dont see you cause you are at the down part of your push ups and one of them says "Who de fukk seed dat" and you say "Me"!!! So ya pops scream out" Mandy, help before they put more firecrackers in my nostrils"!!!!!! But you see a Free Big Mac coupon and a half drinken Dr.Pepper under one of the cars. What would you do?

I can't breathe!!

 

[R.O. Double]

road trip with my pops from htown to richmond ca...

a lil bit outside of demings new mexico..near the new mexico arizona boarder...saw purplish burgandy aqua blue lookin lights..


n it got closer n closer to our car...then eventually it was right above us...everything cut off...truck rolled for like 5seconds...n jus stopped...

me n pops quiet as fukk...

popped rolled em a joint...smoked it ...grabbed his jacka subtractor ( glock 40) put it in his lap...locked the doors...n told me dont say shyt..

we sat out there for like 30mins be4 everything came back on...

n he told me if we get pulled over dont say u saw shyt...u had jus woke up...

next thing i know 11 black suvs came flyin behind us n eventually around us in wishbone formation..we pulled over...

they had army guns ....and question my pops had he seen anything weird or lights...he told em nall...he high as et p*ssy right now...

they continued questionin him..n ask me stuff..i played dumb...

n they let us go...


that was the last time we ever drove to cali on i-10

nikka.

Everytime i ride thru NM and AZ if its after 1am i listen to a show called coast to coast radio and they be talking bout shyt like that. Creepy as fukk on an empty desert road.