Essential The Official Coli Horror Film Thread: Discussion, Recommendations And Murder.
- Thread starter Dominic Brehetto
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just a snippet of the score
i hope its as menacing as the first few movies
storyteller
Veteran
I watched a bunch of the recent Shudder Originals to drop recently...good news is they're better than the last batch that dropped. Bad news is I don't think any of them was hit that "go watch it ASAP" mark and they were still more decent than really good.
Glorious: This was my favorite of the bunch I saw, though it's more comedy built off satirizing typical cosmic horror. A dude is depressed over the end of a relationship and hungover, he goes into gross public restroom and finds himself dealing with a Lovecraftian situation. This one features Jason Stackhouse from the True Blood series and the voice of J.K. Simmons. They both have really good performances and the ridiculousness of the circumstances makes it pretty funny with a hint of mystery. But it's goofy as all hell and the closest thing to a twist kinda felt telegraphed to me. It's pretty good IMO, for a fairly short and enclosed affair.
I wouldn't score it as scary at all...a bit of a theme across the ones I watched tbh. They're entertaining for various reasons, but the scary bits are secondary to other elements.
Who Invited Them: Another really entertaining movie that I'd categorize as Dark Comedy moreso than horror, though this one always feels like its building up to a thriller/horror conclusion. The trailer does a good job of showing you what to expect, maybe too much so. A couple moves into a bougie new place and throw a housewarming party. After their friends leave, an uninvited couple of neighbors are still lingering.
This ends up being one of those "unlikeable protagonists get come uppance" but the main couple isn't so bad that you don't feel for them. The movie almost plays out like a twisted couples therapy that gets them into some funny try-hard interactions and situations. My complaint is that it's a very slow build to the bigger moments that we were waiting for...and then it's over pretty quickly. But the dark comedy stuff hit for me and I was genuinely enjoying the movie even without much outright horror.
Watcher: Felt a little bit flat for me, but I appreciated what they were going for. An American newlywed moves to her a city in her husband's home country (an Eastern European seeming country though I can't remember which). He's constantly working and she's constantly alone, people watching through the windows across the street...which helps her realize a creepy dude is doing the same thing across the straight and potentially watching her.
This one is a genuine thriller that plays on being a stranger in a new place. It does the "is that guy really dangerous or is it in her head" thing but I feel like it plays that too close to the cuff. So the scary bits just never felt threatening enough for me to get into it. But if you like these sorts of movies, I think it's a solid addition.
The Banishing: At this point, I wanted something more genuinely horror. So I went with this haunted house movie set in 1930. It kinda feels like someone wanted to make a prequel to oculus with a lot of mirror stuff and character hallucinations and illusions. But the plot is a lot more clunky and tries to do too much imo. That said, it has a few memorable scares and fed my itch for a genuine horror movie.
So I didn't hate any of 'em...I didn't love any either. But they were all in range of alright to pretty good.
Glorious: This was my favorite of the bunch I saw, though it's more comedy built off satirizing typical cosmic horror. A dude is depressed over the end of a relationship and hungover, he goes into gross public restroom and finds himself dealing with a Lovecraftian situation. This one features Jason Stackhouse from the True Blood series and the voice of J.K. Simmons. They both have really good performances and the ridiculousness of the circumstances makes it pretty funny with a hint of mystery. But it's goofy as all hell and the closest thing to a twist kinda felt telegraphed to me. It's pretty good IMO, for a fairly short and enclosed affair.
I wouldn't score it as scary at all...a bit of a theme across the ones I watched tbh. They're entertaining for various reasons, but the scary bits are secondary to other elements.
Who Invited Them: Another really entertaining movie that I'd categorize as Dark Comedy moreso than horror, though this one always feels like its building up to a thriller/horror conclusion. The trailer does a good job of showing you what to expect, maybe too much so. A couple moves into a bougie new place and throw a housewarming party. After their friends leave, an uninvited couple of neighbors are still lingering.
This ends up being one of those "unlikeable protagonists get come uppance" but the main couple isn't so bad that you don't feel for them. The movie almost plays out like a twisted couples therapy that gets them into some funny try-hard interactions and situations. My complaint is that it's a very slow build to the bigger moments that we were waiting for...and then it's over pretty quickly. But the dark comedy stuff hit for me and I was genuinely enjoying the movie even without much outright horror.
Watcher: Felt a little bit flat for me, but I appreciated what they were going for. An American newlywed moves to her a city in her husband's home country (an Eastern European seeming country though I can't remember which). He's constantly working and she's constantly alone, people watching through the windows across the street...which helps her realize a creepy dude is doing the same thing across the straight and potentially watching her.
This one is a genuine thriller that plays on being a stranger in a new place. It does the "is that guy really dangerous or is it in her head" thing but I feel like it plays that too close to the cuff. So the scary bits just never felt threatening enough for me to get into it. But if you like these sorts of movies, I think it's a solid addition.
The Banishing: At this point, I wanted something more genuinely horror. So I went with this haunted house movie set in 1930. It kinda feels like someone wanted to make a prequel to oculus with a lot of mirror stuff and character hallucinations and illusions. But the plot is a lot more clunky and tries to do too much imo. That said, it has a few memorable scares and fed my itch for a genuine horror movie.
So I didn't hate any of 'em...I didn't love any either. But they were all in range of alright to pretty good.
I hate Mother; thought it was a pretentious indulgent mess of a film by a director who's ego needed to be reigned in by the studio.
Mother! (2017)
Don't know if this is considered horror. I found the film in the horror section on Amazon; I'll count it. Jeffiner Lawerence had a lot of hate back in the day-- never had a problem with her-- and I enjoyed this film for what it is. I read all the online interpretations about Javier Bardem being God and Lawerence being mother nature. What had me spooked was imagining myself in that situation. One day you wake up, and everything goes to shyt due to your spouse's overwhelming, friendly hospitality. They let one person in (the doctor played by Ed Harris), which caused a significant slippery slope.
I bet celebrities must relate to the context of the film.
People love your work to the point they worship you or go as far as to track you down. For Bardem's character, he loved the attention; Lawerence's character, on the contrary.
The film got mixed reviews during the time of its release. I would say it's enjoyable. Mother! won't be a priority on my rewatch list. I say Jenefier Lawerence should act in horror films.
Night of Demons (1988)
How was this film's reception among horror fans at its release? I can't imagine critics leaving positive reviews, but the horror fans at the time had to love this. Right?
It's not a good film, almost cheesy at times. But I give it a plus because I assume it's a horror film that captures the time of how things were and the direction in which horror films were going. The formula is there: a cast of actors portraying high schoolers, sex, booze, and partying in a haunted house.
Night of Demons is a film you can only recommend to hardcore horror fans. I would consider the movie something you throw on to get super high too. I want to give props to the nude scenes and for letting a brother survive.
Didn't know there was a sequel. Might try to watch.
Nightbreed (1990)
I actually read the short story before watching this film. I'm not surprised Clive Barker directed this with how faithful the film is to the story. It's not Hellraiser territory, but it's enjoyable.
I remember reading Barker had a low budget for Hellraiser, so his team did the best they could do. They excelled with make-up and graphics, and for the time Nightbreed was released, I say it did so too. But for 2022 standards, that shyt looks hella outdated, lol. I understand how reboots of older narrations need to happen sometimes. With a bigger budget, and today's standards in technology, Nightbreed's presentation could be 1000 times better.
This idea makes me excited for the new Hellraiser. I understand the original is a classic, but an adaptation with a bigger budget could be fantastic.
Most memorable thing about the movie is that in the official Mother movie thread on here some weirdo kept getting big mad because I dared to not like and was arguing that the only reason anyone wouldn't like the movie is because they didn't understand it like this piece of shyt was deeper than a teaspoon of water.
Overly serious snobby film nerds are the worst.
Night of the Demons is awesome. It is everything I love about 80s horror. The sequel was entertaining but not as much fun as the original.
There was a 2009 remake too with Shannon Elizabeth as Angela. It was OK but also not as much fun as the OF movie.
I have always considered Nightbreed to be a movie filled with amazing concepts/visuals but no real cohesive story to grab audiences. If the concept were to be in the hands of a better director/writer I think a horror classic could come out of it.
I would say it's a toss up between Mike Flanagan and Leigh Wannell for who has next.
Of the horror remakes I would rank the top 5 as:
1. Dawn of the Dead
2. Evil Dead
3. My Bloody Valentine
4. The Town That Dreaded Sundown
5. Texas Chainsaw Massacre (2003)
I wouldn't even put the Nightmare on Elm Street and Friday the 13th remakes in my Top 10...maybe not even the Top 20.
The Definitive List of Rob Zombie Movies Ranked From Worst to Best By Me
8. 31
7. Halloween 2
6. The Lords of Salem
5. Three From Hell
4. The Haunted World of El Superbeasto
3. Halloween
2. House of 1,000 Corpses
1. The Devil's Rejects
8. 31
7. Halloween 2
6. The Lords of Salem
5. Three From Hell
4. The Haunted World of El Superbeasto
3. Halloween
2. House of 1,000 Corpses
1. The Devil's Rejects
Here's Every Rob Zombie Movie, Ranked
BYDAVID L TAMARIN
PUBLISHED FEB 20, 2022
Rob Zombie puts the auteur in 'provocateur,' with his obvious love of grindhouse films and dirty 70s aesthetic. His love for that era's horror and exploitation films likeThe Last House on the Left and Texas Chainsaw Massacre 2 (evident in his use of 70s actors like Bill Moseley and Sid Haig) is absolutely infectious.
Here's Every Rob Zombie Movie, Ranked
Putting the auteur in 'provocateur,' Rob Zombie movies are wild, sadistic throwbacks to '70s grindhouse horror. Take a look at his filmography.movieweb.com
Its got a Tremors vibe to it.
I watched the first 5 eps of this show in one sitting and it depressed the hell out of me.All I can say is
Systemic failure at every level
Some stuff I watched recently
The Invitation
For a rom-com this was pretty well done but for a horror movie it was pure mediocrity.
I give 'The Invitation' 2 out 4 Gun Totin' Dr. Loomis'
Maneater
A cheap, cheesy mess of a movie.
I give 'Maneater' 1 out of 4 Gun Totin' Dr. Loomis'
Shark Side of The Moon
A cheap, cheesy mess of a movie. But it was also unintentionally hilarious!
I give 'Shark Side of The Moon' 2 out of 4 Gun Totin' Dr. Loomis'
The Last Exorcism
Aside from some quibbles I have with how they got to to the ending, I really enjoyed this movie and found it to be one of the more enjoyable found footage films I have watched recently.
I give 'The Last Exorcism' 3 out 4 Gun Totin' Dr. Loomis'
Dead Zone
A terrible zombie action movie that makes me wish someone would hook Michael Jai White up so he doesn't have to keep making crap like this.
I give 'Dead Zone' 1 out of 4 Gun Totin' Dr. Loomis'
Glorious
I really liked this movie. It was tight without a lot of fluff and despite being mostly just Jason Stackhouse in a gloryhole stall with the voice of Verne Schillinger, it was still compelling and had me invested in the dilemma and decisions that the characters had to make. I think the movie's ending would've been more powerful without the twist but that wasn't enough to derail my enjoyment.
I give 'Glorious' 3 out 4 Gun Totin' Dr. Loomis'
The Immaculate Room
Basically 90 minutes of watching the relationship between two sentient rice cakes crumble under the weight of them having to be in one another's company.
I give 'The Immaculate Room' 1 out of 4 Gun Totin' Dr. Loomis'
Orphan: First Kill
I am admittedly not the biggest fan of the original Orphan but I went into this with a semi-open mind and I did like the twist but felt they squandered the potential of the twist pretty quickly. Also Isabelle Fuhrman looked old in the face. It was like they spent no time on trying to use makeup to make her look younger and she also recently starred in a movie where she was a competitive swimmer her training for that gave her really broad shoulders so that the contrast between Esther from the front and the child they used for shots of Esther from the back were jarring.
I give 'Orphan: First Kill' 2 out 4 Gun Totin' Dr. Loomis'
The Invitation
For a rom-com this was pretty well done but for a horror movie it was pure mediocrity.
I give 'The Invitation' 2 out 4 Gun Totin' Dr. Loomis'
Maneater
A cheap, cheesy mess of a movie.
I give 'Maneater' 1 out of 4 Gun Totin' Dr. Loomis'
Shark Side of The Moon
A cheap, cheesy mess of a movie. But it was also unintentionally hilarious!
I give 'Shark Side of The Moon' 2 out of 4 Gun Totin' Dr. Loomis'
The Last Exorcism
Aside from some quibbles I have with how they got to to the ending, I really enjoyed this movie and found it to be one of the more enjoyable found footage films I have watched recently.
I give 'The Last Exorcism' 3 out 4 Gun Totin' Dr. Loomis'
Dead Zone
A terrible zombie action movie that makes me wish someone would hook Michael Jai White up so he doesn't have to keep making crap like this.
I give 'Dead Zone' 1 out of 4 Gun Totin' Dr. Loomis'
Glorious
I really liked this movie. It was tight without a lot of fluff and despite being mostly just Jason Stackhouse in a gloryhole stall with the voice of Verne Schillinger, it was still compelling and had me invested in the dilemma and decisions that the characters had to make. I think the movie's ending would've been more powerful without the twist but that wasn't enough to derail my enjoyment.
I give 'Glorious' 3 out 4 Gun Totin' Dr. Loomis'
The Immaculate Room
Basically 90 minutes of watching the relationship between two sentient rice cakes crumble under the weight of them having to be in one another's company.
I give 'The Immaculate Room' 1 out of 4 Gun Totin' Dr. Loomis'
Orphan: First Kill
I am admittedly not the biggest fan of the original Orphan but I went into this with a semi-open mind and I did like the twist but felt they squandered the potential of the twist pretty quickly. Also Isabelle Fuhrman looked old in the face. It was like they spent no time on trying to use makeup to make her look younger and she also recently starred in a movie where she was a competitive swimmer her training for that gave her really broad shoulders so that the contrast between Esther from the front and the child they used for shots of Esther from the back were jarring.
I give 'Orphan: First Kill' 2 out 4 Gun Totin' Dr. Loomis'
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Jello is back
And of course, he’s quoting me with Rob Zombie side shade.
Don’t worry - @Lootpack aka The Hatinest of RZ Haters aka Jello Jr. has expressed his disdain more than enough times in the past few weeks. No need to pile on
Good to see your back though
Duke Dixon
Superstar
I liked the Friday the 13th Remake. For the 2000+ remakes(if it's all years of course The Thing #1 The Fly #2) I've seen and remember I'd probably rank them as
- Dawn of the Dead
- RZ Halloween
- 13 Ghosts
- Evil Dead
- TCM 2003
- Fright Night
- Suspiria
- Friday the 13th
- House of Wax
- Child's Play (dog shyt)
- NoES (dog shyt)
I was watching The Town that Dread Sundown but passed out after the 2nd kill. I need to go back and finish it. It was more brutal than I wasn't expecting.
Trying to get some Halloween seasonal specific content going:
The Official Coli Horror Film Thread Squad Presents: Theme Week- The Countdown to Halloween Season: Movies, Series, Challenges, VS, Trivia and other
Each week will post up a horror related theme, topic, etc until October 31st. Week 1/2: Name a horror movie that was inspired by or based on a true story, event, or circumstance along with the backstory (including article or video)
www.thecoli.com