The General Mills Chronicles.

General Mills

General Mills

More often than not I tend to take that L.
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To this day... I have no idea why I was so nervous. ITS A BROTHEL!!! :mindblown: They want me to approach them to fukk. :snoop:

I order and down two more drinks. Now I am :drunk: I go up to Vanessa.

Me - Hey ma. Whats really good? :drunk:

V - OHHH Papi. Can you buy me a drink too?

Me - I got you. (Orders two drinks) We both :cheers: drink up.

V - Lets go upstairs silly boy.


:lolbron:

I look back at Hump and he gives me a thumbs up and turns to the bar to order a drink. We go upstairs. I pay the cashier 35 bucks. We go into the bedroom and its a bed in a room that is surrounded by glass!!! The ceiling, walls, everything!!

She yanks off my pants and starts sucking me off.... I am drunk in Puerto Rico getting sucked off by a phat ass V Williams!

I push her off the dikk and bend her over and jump inside. After two pumps I did the worst thing... I looked at myself in the mirrors........

I am trying to understand what happened.... But.. As I continued to stroke...I could not help but look at myself in the mirror... I looked so damn good. I looked so damn good to myself no homo that I busted on the 6th stroke. :shaq2:




fukkkkkkk.... I pull up my pants and stumble downstairs.. I walk up to Hump and he is turning back from the bar with his drink in his hand.. He is

Hump - Aye. You decided not to do it huh.

Me - What do you mean? I tore it up.

Hump - My nikka. As you were leaving I ordered a drink. You were back down here before I even took a sip of the drink??? :dwillhuh:

Me - the mirrors fukked me up homie!! dont tell nobody. :to:

Hump - :gladbron:
 
Regular_P

Regular_P

Just end the season.
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General Mills said:
Hump - Aye. You decided not to do it huh.

Me - What do you mean? I tore it up.

Hump - My nikka. As you were leaving I ordered a drink. You were back down here before I even took a sip of the drink??? :dwillhuh:
Click to expand...

pgdead.png
 
General Mills

General Mills

More often than not I tend to take that L.
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Hump is dying! :umad: I am trying to hush this nikka but he was :deadmanny: I have to redeem myself. I am not a drinker but I was going to get it in today. I threw down three more drinks while Hump is telling everyone the story. :snoop:

I am so :drunk: I stumble up to a beautiful Columbian chick. Tell her lets gooo. She is :whoo: OK PAPII!!!!! :smile:

We go upstairs ... I pay again.. I knock the dust off this time. I guess it was the liquor and loose p*ssy walls. I could not nut! :noah: Finally after 30 minutes I hear management knocking on the door. Telling me that if I stay longer I have to pay another 35. I yelled out ok ok!!! And continued to dive bomb on this chick.

Finally I busted..... :ahh: Ol girl is looking at me like :skip: WOW PAPI! I am :smugdraper: Now comes the time for extra payment. I dont have it........ I look in my pockets.. Empty.... In my drunken haze I did the only thing that made sense. I grabbed a trash bag from the garbage can and jumped off the second story balcony.

The plan was to float down like a GI-Joe paratrooper. It did not work out like I envisioned....
 
Last edited:
Golayitdown

Golayitdown

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General Mills said:
Hump is dying! :umad: I am trying to hush this nikka but he was :deadmanny: I have to redeem myself. I am not a drinker but I was going to get it in today. I threw down three more drinks while Hump is telling everyone the story. :snoop:

I am so :drunk: I stumble up to a beautiful Columbian chick. Tell her lets gooo. She is :whoo: OK PAPII!!!!! :smile:

We go upstairs ... I pay again.. I knock the dust off this time. I guess it was the liquor and loose p*ssy walls. I could not nut! :noah: Finally after 30 minutes I hear management knocking on the door. Telling me that if I stay longer I have to pay another 35. I yelled out ok ok!!! And continued to dive bomb on this chick.

Finally I busted..... :ahh: Ol girl is looking at me like :skip: WOW PAPI! I am :smugdraper: Now comes the time for extra payment. I dont have it........ I look in my pockets.. Empty.... In my drunken haze I did the only thing that made sense. I grabbed a trash can from the garbage can and jumped off the second story balcony.

The plan was to float down like a GI-Joe paratrooper. It did not work out like I envisioned....
Click to expand...


My man threw himself in the bushes
 
Leasy

Leasy

Let's add some Alizarin Crimson & Van Dyke Brown
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General Mills said:
Hump is dying! :umad: I am trying to hush this nikka but he was :deadmanny: I have to redeem myself. I am not a drinker but I was going to get it in today. I threw down three more drinks while Hump is telling everyone the story. :snoop:

I am so :drunk: I stumble up to a beautiful Columbian chick. Tell her lets gooo. She is :whoo: OK PAPII!!!!! :smile:

We go upstairs ... I pay again.. I knock the dust off this time. I guess it was the liquor and loose p*ssy walls. I could not nut! :noah: Finally after 30 minutes I hear management knocking on the door. Telling me that if I stay longer I have to pay another 35. I yelled out ok ok!!! And continued to dive bomb on this chick.

Finally I busted..... :ahh: Ol girl is looking at me like :skip: WOW PAPI! I am :smugdraper: Now comes the time for extra payment. I dont have it........ I look in my pockets.. Empty.... In my drunken haze I did the only thing that made sense. I grabbed a trash can from the garbage can and jumped off the second story balcony.

The plan was to float down like a GI-Joe paratrooper. It did not work out like I envisioned....
Click to expand...

In tears man. Wtf at jumping out the window. Ron brown that shyt bro.
 
KingsnBucs1987

KingsnBucs1987

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General Mills said:
I bounced off the pavement hard as fukkkkk. :why: The three high school kids were :deadmanny: I was all kinds of scrapped up. My hands got it bad. Tore up my pants and severely strained my wrist. Felt like that shyt was broken. It started swelling up immediately.

I am wondering what the fukk hit me?? I look down and see

Up on the grassy knoll was the shooter. Mary. She was :queen: smh. cotdammit... Meanwhile my girl comes running over... :ufdup: Before she can say anything I yell.. LOOK AT MY fukkING WINDOW! HE DID THAT FOR NO REASON AND THEN HE LAUGHED IN MY FACE She was :whoa: Then :mindblown: Then the family dog provided the last L. When my girl ran out the house she left the door open and Murphy the dog came out. He saunters up to me while me and her are talking. I am still sitting down. He is sniffing me and it annoyed me. So while I was standing up shooed his ass away. I guess he did not take kindly to that. He bit me on my ass.:noah: It was painful as fukkkkk.

I spin around :wtf:and he is ghost. I was done brehs. My ass was leaking. My hand was swollen as fukk. Window was murked. For what?? Some puss?? Nah B. I got in my whip and left.
Click to expand...

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tumblr_lo5eeaY4bA1qii6tmo1_250.gif
 
General Mills

General Mills

More often than not I tend to take that L.
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:snoop: It was my first time truly drunk. Also my first time in a brothel fukking ho's. When I noticed I did not have extra cash I thought of the worst.. I am in a foreign country in a whore house. They are going to whip my ass and probably kill me....:wow:

In retrospect all I had to do was ask Hump, Pretty Boy, or any of the other 25 sailors on my ship for cash. I was in a haze and I snatched the trash bag out of the can and jumped :cape: out the window without a single fukk being given.

Like I said I thought the trash bag would inflate with air.. I would enjoy a leisurely ride down to earth.

paratrooper_with_parachute_lg_wht.gif


When I landed I would then figure out my next course of action. Well... After grabbing the trash bag ol girl looked at me like :blink: I remember grinning at her like Parker Lewis.

parker-lewis-cant-lose-corin-nemec.jpg

How could I lose? I jumped out that bytch! :gladbron:

tumblr_lis9q2eNUe1qejp6uo1_250.gif


While in the air I spread my arms out wide so the trash bag could fill up with air and I could float away from here. As i am flapping my arms trying to get this damn bag to catch a breeze I hit the ground....

fukkKKKKKKKK!!

ALL THE WIND GETS KNOCKED OUT OF ME. I did not even brace myself for the fall. Hell I was so busy looking up at the bag that I did not even see the ground. Damn lucky I did not break every bone in my body.

I landed in what appeared to be a mud patch.. As I am crawling around moaning trying catch my breath... I take a wiff......It is like I am crawling around in a fukking sewer!! All I smell is shyt and piss....

tumblr_mj4jr3fCpu1s6ws3jo1_250.gif
 
Golayitdown

Golayitdown

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General Mills said:
:snoop: It was my first time truly drunk. Also my first time in a brothel fukking ho's. When I noticed I did not have extra cash I thought of the worst.. I am in a foreign country in a whore house. They are going to whip my ass and probably kill me....:wow:

In retrospect all I had to do was ask Hump, Pretty Boy, or any of the other 25 sailors on my ship for cash. I was in a haze and I snatched the trash bag out of the can and jumped :cape: out the window without a single fukk being given.

Like I said I thought the trash bag would inflate with air.. I would enjoy a leisurely ride down to earth.

paratrooper_with_parachute_lg_wht.gif


When I landed I would then figure out my next course of action. Well... After grabbing the trash bag ol girl looked at me like :blink: I remember grinning at her like Parker Lewis.

parker-lewis-cant-lose-corin-nemec.jpg

How could I lose? I jumped out that bytch! :gladbron:

tumblr_lis9q2eNUe1qejp6uo1_250.gif


While in the air I spread my arms out wide so the trash bag could fill up with air and I could float away from here. As i am flapping my arms trying to get this damn bag to catch a breeze I hit the ground....

fukkKKKKKKKK!!

ALL THE WIND GETS KNOCKED OUT OF ME. I did not even brace myself for the fall. Hell I was so busy looking up at the bag that I did not even see the ground. Damn lucky I did not break every bone in my body.

I landed in what appeared to be a mud patch.. As I am crawling around moaning trying catch my breath... I take a wiff......It is like I am crawling around in a fukking sewer!! All I smell is shyt and piss....

tumblr_mj4jr3fCpu1s6ws3jo1_250.gif
Click to expand...


In TEARS :russ:
 
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