I feel like this is gender trauma bonding fodder. People sensationalize horrible aspects of different types of relationships to justify their own romantic status. Married people will talk trash about single people and how awful it must be and how lonely it must be.
So this is the single version.
But life is what you make it…soooooo….what’s up with all these fear street chronicles. Even I had to talk myself down off a ledge b/c sometimes when I look at marriage as a female all I see is a trap and sacrifice and stress.
But you control your life so why not just make the marriage you want?
If you want a traditional marriage (which is misunderstood in many cases anyway), then man foots all the bills, brings that check home to wifey in exchange for having to do not much of anything else beyond, hold down a job, play with the kids, and grab the shotgun if a home invasion happens.
And you go into that arrangement understanding that the woman is more vulnerable b:c she could be put out with her babies at anytime if you decide to leave or dip out with side p*ssy. So her vulnerability makes her a.) stash some money bavk for herself to ensure she has a plan b if you decide to bounce and b.) laws are set up to help with that transition if it occurs.
But that’s the risk you take if you want 100% control in a relationship as head of the household.
But if you want a more progressive marriage, then both of ya’ll work. You both contribute equitably to household responsibilities and child care. You both pool money for the good of the family and you work together as a unit for the good of everyone. No one is more important than the other and both parties are equally respected. The power dynamic is equitable so the expectation is that all parties involved are contributing financially and in as many ways as can be reasonably expected to. But in this dynamic you get less room to play b/c both of you are bringing something economically tangible to the table.
This isn’t better than the traditional way and vice versa. It’s just an option.
But what won’t work is one person giving more than the other, but still feeling entitled to benefits of both structures. Relationships aren’t about controlling or getting over on someone. Or power plays. It’s about two parties getting together b/c the lives they wish to build will be better if they build together.
But mentally ill people with validation issues, deficit mindsets, and power hungry individuals look at marriage as a power play instead of an opportunity for positive growth.
bytch you wanted equality pay your fair share ain't no free rides anymore!!!
