this reminds me of when eazy-e was in the hospital.
hopefully its not the same outcome.
Rest in Peace DMX April 9th, 2021
- Thread starter FreshAIG
- Start date
this reminds me of when eazy-e was in the hospital.
hopefully its not the same outcome.
DarkandHellisHot
All Star
Dog Based Gremlin
Veteran
I don’t want to join in the argument but I’ve taken a little bit of time to think through what I wanted to say. It’s easy for us to say or hope, but it’s another thing for an addict to rearrange what has essentially become who they are. There’s nothing to overcome. There’s isn’t a figurative hole to climb out of.
We’ve spent most of our lives watching him try to shake that shyt off and it still finds a way back into what we think we see as his life.
I have more than a few family members with real deal addictions. Two in particular were the worst, a I have an uncle with a crack cocaine addiction and HAD another with a heroin addiction he developed after coming home from Vietnam. My uncle died a heroin addict, my other uncle will likely die a crack addict. They’ve stolen from us, shamed our family, turned away from their children, etc.
I used to take it personally, but like many other things in life, I learned to add another layer of coldness around my heart. I eventually learned to see it from an addicts point of view, though I can’t truly empathize, I no longer blame them or see them as weak. My normal/okay is their normal/okay
I used the phrase “who they are” because between potential life factors, the chemical rewiring of their brain, and the alignment of their development (we never stop) all contribute to the addiction.
Who and who we are, as a consciousness, boils down to the wrinkles in our brains, our synapses, and the chemicals/mini lightning bolts that pass in between. Truly addictive substances, actions, and states of living rearrange all of that. If you start young it becomes the literal foundation of who you are. I don’t mean that in a proverbial sense, I mean that you’re now chemically/biologically hardwired to be that person.
If you have kids and you feel happy when you see them. It’s not the kids that make you happy, it’s the pattern of electric impulses and chemicals passing between synapses, when you experience your kids, that make you happy, or sad, or angry, etc. Addictive substances evict all that other shyt until those old inputs start to give the same chemical signature of the shyt we dread like the feeling of something jabbing you into your eye, a bad cut, nausea, aches, depression, etc.
Every time we watched the man we know as Earl Simmons go to Arizona or go to rehab we thought he was leaving the drugs and old life behind. That was never the case, it never left him.
Think of a place, state of being, etc. that is a complete normal for you. Like a baseline for existence with no stress, no outside input to affect your life; maybe bedtime or something. Now thing of a state of being that’s the complete opposite, an extreme abnormal state of being, that makes you as uncomfortable as you can ever imagine.
From the outside looking in we look at the drugs or drink someone uses as an extra attachment. In reality it’s pretty much interwoven into their very being. Being high/drunk is their normal, everything else We truly watched a man try his best, year after year to completely re-write himself, or his “normal”.
What we think of as a normal peaceful state is complete chaos to an addict. The normal includes the chemical, physical, and social dependency. The abnormal is trying to live what we see as a normal life when all the chemicals in your brain are telling telling you that you’re in a proverbial hell, those same chemicals that shape who we are as a person. Without them we’d be almost catatonic zombies. If you’ve ever had the misfortune to be prescribed something like dissolvable zyprexa then you can probably relate.
There’s a lot that can potentially drive an addict. Plenty of ways to feel as we judge them and/or try to rationalize their addictions. there’s also an infinite amount of mental and physical suffering, that we don’t see or feel, because they know more than anybody else that their an addict, don’t want to be, and have to come to terms with their bodies and minds turning on them.
It’s hard for us to imagine but rehab, quitting, all that shyt is essential a person trying to rip their minds to shreds, smush the pieces back together in the wrong order (sobriety), then trying to live the rest of their lives without rearranging themselves in the correct order (addiction).
I don’t feel any kind of way that anyone is mad at Earl Simmons. His childhood, life as he knew it, and past overall are done. I just hoped I could explain the addict in a better context. We were fortunate enough to experience his light, though masked as “DMX”. For a brief yet triumphant moment we got to see DMX’s star shine brighter than Earl’s demons and addictions ever could and I’m at peace with that, and I can only hope that he’s at peace with that. There’s nothing more we can do.
I can empathize with the poster’s that are angry with you but I’m not angry with you. I just hope you can grow to see Earl in a different light because this experience we call life just isn’t in our control. We aren’t Earl or his experiences, and experience will trump our words every time. We aren’t the first to feel that an addict should have done something different, we won’t be the last.
Last edited:
I “met” DMX in front of “El Puerto” seafood spot in Harlem with some of his friends. I looked like I was about to rob him the way I was dressed that night lol. cool dude. Hope he pull thru.He always had that down to earth vibe to him. Not surprised in the slightest.
Get well X.
I remember DMX saying in an interview that he had to check himself because he called somebody a "bum ass nikka". He was like wtf have I become that I'm calling someone a bum ass nikka, me of all people...said it disgusted him. Utmost respect for him when I saw that.
sayyestothis
Free the guys
FromBillionsCameOne
All Star
May the God become one with another.
You lived thru that?
X wasnt even sober during this interview
regardless this is a sad sad say for hip hop
BK The Great
Veteran
Beautiful, Ruff Ryders will forever be my favorites.
https://www.instagram.com/p/CNQPmw3j3eR/?igshid=1xog5athr4ati
https://www.instagram.com/p/CNQPmw3j3eR/?igshid=1xog5athr4ati
TrifeGod
Chasing The Dragon
Beautiful. Man....the R logo is still HEAT imma keep saying that shi
DoubleClutch
Superstar
People sadly are going to look over this because "God lolz", when reality he would have been dead ages ago if it wasn't for his faith in the lord. Dude been through so friggin much from birth to his resting bed fighting for his life. Its easy for folks to say "believe in yourself" or "be a man", but how can this man know what it's like to be a fukking man when everybody in his past life did him dirty to the point he can't even trust his own flesh
His damn parents left him at a boys home, his own mans laced his blunt with crack, and society treated him like a embodiment of jokes because "crackhead lololol". Through it all, he fought through and still had God by his side.
Sadly it was too late, but all in all I look at this man as more of a man of God than these sorry ass good for nothing brethren that do shyt behind closed doors
right DMX been through a lot but never turned his back on God and always stayed praying and giving God thanks. Nobody is perfect. He knows what is right at the end of the day.
you could say the same for Kanye.
