Essential Quick Lil Gems on Dealing with Women

[Rocket Scientist]

True. This is with regards to some chick I met recently. Her family lives in my city but for the summer she is in Calgary.

Also how do ya'll feel about when youre texting a girl and starting the conversations early on. I dont like to play games but I'm thinking that to gauge if this girls feeling me...I might go a few weeks without a word and see if she initiates. I'm not sure she would because I know how these african girls are...but I'm still curiious.

If your starting the conversations its a bad sign.Its sort of like pulling teeth...thats how it leads to 1 word conversations by her.Your approach should be laid back and care less.If she texts back cool game on,if she doesnt oh well A conversation should be used to advance you to a date.Like I tell yall...you dont want to be a woman's conversation buddy (unless your in a relationship,marriage then you are automatically a sounding board).When getting to know a woman the less YOU say the better.Waiting on a woman for anything is recipe for disaster.

 

[MikelArteta]

dont got facebook anymore breh...remaking an account would be wayyy too overboard. I tried following on twitter but her account is protected. I pressed follow...and it didnt say pending after i checked later so i guess she denied permission . I was baffled lol. The lesson there was you can do everything right and sometimes these hoes will still deny you for whatever reason. Just the way it goes.

After that though. I was going to the washroom in the go station in brampton. As i came out I see this decent looking black chick walk past me to go to the girlsroom. I was considering bagging her, but then I saw her friend who was outside with some luggage. Chopped it up real quick and got the number after her friends came and scooped her to go home.

The blood was boiling after the first rejection @Atlrocafella. When I saw the 2nd opportunity I said eff it and went to work without even a second thought. Thats how it happens.

Rejection is better than regret.

sent from royalty via tapatalk

 

[Oye]

I saw this woman's profile on an online dating site and did a search on her screen name and came up with her Facebook page. I am impressed by what I see on her FB page she seems really family oriented has all tasteful pics. From what I could gather from my creeper tactics she was in a LTR that ended and the guys in her area are really corny. I've said I'm not looking for anything serious but she's into cars too which is just to me.

Spoiler

Added bonus the Brazilian woman still wants to kick it when I'm down there and she is just so fine.*

Spoiler

 

[CrossBones]

being forward is how you talk to a woman, yes, but if you want her to talk to you, then it helps to be more "indirect." if you want to find out about her, then you need to understand their ways and methods of speaking to you. yes, believe me. being indirect is their language. you can really loosen her tongue and make her feel comfortable whenever youre getting her to talk about herself a lot.

for me, Im seeing that being forward is best when youre telling her something, making suggestions for her, informing her on what you plan to do, or telling her what you expect from her. basically be direct in what youre saying to her.

but when you need to get info from her, its best to look at what you DONT say.

see on the flip side, to get a woman to open up and talk to me, I have this new thing where Im giving up on asking her a lot of questions. it begins to feel too much like an interview if you do that. I am learning to lead her into opening up for me. Im not trying to be so obvious anymore when Im getting girls to talk and get things off her chest. this method has been working out pretty well with me for the last two months. Im so used to being upfront that it used to put a lot of pressure on them. they put their guards up like that.sometimes, you dont want to do that.



this is not meant to be a pua interlude, but its just something Ive added to my conversation game and wanted to share. use it every now and then if you feel like it. things feel easier and can flow nicer. I recommend it mostly for a new prospect, and not so much for a long term relationship. but it might if you know her that well.



Im going to explain it as best as I can. its not for everyone, but Im getting a whole lot of answers without even asking them a thing. what can I say.




its simple: I open up the conversation to go a certain place, then I may or may not add a personal opinion at the end of the statement. then I leave it at that


plain and upfront. nothing complicated or drawn out. it gives her a "mysterious" vibe as well, and that momentary pause you leave at the end of your statement engages her to come out and join in. she will be waiting to put her little two cents in. its puts the spot light off of you and right onto her since you just finished your statement with a period. if you start to understand the rythym of a conversation and how to get her to talk, you will see that this will spur her to speak out on the first thing that comes to her mind. of course, this will be completely dependant on the topic that YOU just brought up.




do you see? its not the answer to life and to women, but its a good opening technique that Ive been seeing results off of.

as soon as I open the door on a topic I say my quick piece then I'll wait for her to chime in ... but smoothly. I might look at her in a or way, or I might start checking out the room and interacting with other things right after I speak.

that is because she knows that she is starting to bore me by not contributing back. see I did contribute, I just spoke my peace. and if she cant keep up, it makes her look lame and she knows that. she wants to have your attention, so dont hand it to her and dont be all up her ass asking her question after question. say something, then see what she does. this nonchalantness from you lets things flow out smoothly from her.


and the way I do it is subtle... see I didnt ask her shyt. but she 9 times out of ten wants to give you a reply anyways you can pull their strings without being direct. dont wait awkwardly after you talk as well, use a certain amount of finesse and confidence (not caring) and it should work.

when I leave my statement as said and done, its almost as if Im not that interested in whether or not she has anything to say about shyt. she can talk or not, but she can tell that on the low right now its on her. and if shes too quiet, then that starts to say a lot too.


the crazy thing is its even less effort for me, as half of the work now will be done by her. I dont have to draw it out of them becuause they like this approach. it is indirect like their nature is.

me not asking too much is welcoming to her because I didnt come right out and be brolic with it and force an answer. I lead her there. it feels more "natural" to her, and less "forced" because now she can just volunteer her thoughts without feeling like shes under a microscope.

if you look at it from the outside perspective, it almost feels like I could take or leave her personal opinions either way, (especially since I didnt even ask her to respond), and in turn she might feel like she wont be judged on whatever it is that she says. thats really what you want so she can open up.




for example I say "so after my last relationship, Im not looking to get too involved or play any games right now. I think Im at the point where if I can see games are being played, Im just not interested at all."



she says "oh you know me too! my ex was so and so and this happened like such and such ... one time my girl was doing this with another man and ... I hate games because this one time ..."


lead her brehs. dont just tell her to answer you, show her the way.

that way you can learn to get her to open up without asking anything. you presented yourself, and subconsciously she will want to present herself. its very sly. this works in person by the way, not over the text or net because they get that safety of waiting to respond while out of the moment. this isnt necessarily for that.

or I would say "I help when I can, but I really dont like it when I have to come around family members and the same person always has to borrow money. we're family, but come on now..."

so she says "my cousin is like this ... and I always was told that ... my sister says the same she likes to ..."



see I didnt even give her any deep background on me, whats the deal on my opinion, which family member, or anything. it was short. to the point. she ate it up and dived in to add her life story into the mix. this pause engages her. notice: I never even asked about her ex. or her family. she just got caught in that line of thinking and spilled her guts out so she can contribute and get things off her chest. if she feels strongly about a certain subject, then trust she will love the opportunity to speak on it.


Im so care free on it because I feel how I feel when I say it, and now she wants to talk to me on a real level. its a nice change too, to be honest with you. it has worked more often than not lately. I merely open up a topic for some discussion and leave it at that. its indirect, and most likely will catch her off guard with your attitude. that way you can start to get to the real.



being upfront can make it seem like a confrontation to her, and you want to sneak in nice and easy.


once the date goes off pretty well and is under way, I WILL ask some follow up questions, like Im interested in what she says NOW. once shes really into herself and her stories, I just go "really?" "naw!" or "youre kiddin' me right!" once they start feeling youre interested in her opinions, she will be off and start to run her mouth a mile a minute. this excites her. thus, she will be going on and on without realizing that she hasnt been able to censor her stories a lot.



they all have dirt, and you can see it on them if you look close enough. when they really like that youve been listening to her, youll get a good idea about her attitude and truths with the more that she talks.


I can even volunteer information like "I graduated with a ... and studied ... for a while. I like dealing with ..." (the end)

then wait.

then she either follows it up with a question to you (which could show that shes not completelly self absorbed and in her own world - a good thing) or maybe she will tell you what she studies/has graduated with. or maybe she'll just say "I want to go back to school soon..."

and you get a lot from that alone.

my suggestion is to learn to go light on the questions if you can. make it so its just you and her, interacting. theyre so worried about being judged, that youre better off not being direct about everything you want to know. share a little, and she will want to share too. be slick and you can pry it out of her anyways. she wont even know it happened like that.

if you learn to extract answers without asking questions, youll be good money and will eventually learn how to get people to come to you with answers - whether theyve been asked for them or not.

 

[kevm3]

Never be a sucker for your emotions. One aspect that a lot of cats get caught up in is that little warm feeling they get from interacting with a woman. That's nice, but NEVER sacrifice your manhood for ANYTHING, especially a woman. There's just too many guys out there that get henpecked into a weak role... They pay the majority of the bills and on top of that, they cook and clean for their woman. The only thing she does is exist. These are weak cats who let feminism and a host of other nonsense influence their mindset to the point that they are willing to do any and everything to 'keep a woman around.' Screw that... your self-respect is WAY more important.

This leads to us talking about 'checking' a woman. Never 'check' a woman just to fabricate some arguments in an attempt to 'get her turned on' or to introduce drama in order to keep her interested. The purpose of checking a woman is to ensure she understands that you are in control and are to be respected at all times, as well as increasing her understanding on how she needs to get down for you as a woman should. There's a big difference between 'controlling a woman' and being in control. When you are controlling a woman, you are trying to determine her every action and remove her self autonomy. We're not here to 'control' women. We're here to be in control. When you are 'in control', you are trying to maintain a certain atmosphere around you as well as ensuring certain protocols of respect and decent behavior are abided by, but you are not out here trying to treat a woman like your little robot.

Before you start checking a woman, you have to have a well-developed perspective of behaviors that are and are not acceptable. If she does something you don't like and she didn't know, calmly explain it to her why she shouldn't engage in that behavior. If a woman is around you, you should actually feel pleasant. You should enjoy her company. You should not be stressed out or feeling disrespected when you are around a woman. Thus, if she starts getting fly with the mouthpiece or out of line, you 'check her' and let her know that behavior won't fly. Now, if she gets out of line once, it's fine to check her, but if she is constantly challenging your authority, it's time for her to go. Your checking is a sort of warning shot for her if she is 'testing you'... as well as an instructional tool for those behaviors that she didn't know offended you.


Sometimes you hear about women 'throwing little tests', but honestly, screw those tests... don't worry about trying to detect them or whether or not you passed them. What you should always worry about is staying real and coming from a man's perspective in any situation and always making sure your woman is giving you the propr respect. If you start worrying about what tests a woman might throw and how you can pass them, you are letting HER take control of your mind. You will constantly start thinking, "Man, she said something last night. I hope I said the right thing in order or her to perceive I am a man." In other words, you are catering your behavior to what she wants you to do. If you are a man, then you know it and you have no need to 'show' a woman or to force her to understand. If she can't understand you are a man and not to be played with, time for her to go. If a woman is testing me in some way and I 'fail' the test in her mind and she leaves, that's something I really won't trip over. I'm glad to see her go. This isn't high school, and she isn't my teacher, so I ain't nobody to be 'tested'.

Now if you want me to clarify about everything I've been telling you, it's to say, if a woman isn't bringing decent behavior to the table then she's not bringing a doggone thing... so get her from around you. You can't expect anyone to change if you never bring a person's off-kilter behavior to their recognition and if you never punish them for it. Your attention iand time is quality, so why toss your pearls to swine as Jesus says? You may 'miss out' on a few women by having this philosophy, but as I said before, you really aren't missing out on a doggone thing, because who in the world wants to be in the company of a disrespectful, unpleasant woman who makes your day WORSE when she enters into your midst? In other words, never accept any attention just to have it. If it's not quality, it shouldn't be able to enter into your gates.

 

[kevm3]

Let me tell ya'll the real secret behind real 'game.' Instead of trying to 'do what a woman likes', find a woman who 'likes what you do.' There is a HUGE distinction between the two, and just from these two differing mindsets comes your approach.

If you're one of those dudes who does what a woman likes, you're constantly wondering what colognes to wear to 'attract the ladies,' what style is hot so you can bandwagon it to get compliments and what are the best openers and words to say... In other words, your whole routine is basically being the servant of what you imagine some broads to like. In other words, you are a servant not only to random women, but also to your own imagination. You will never gain any real confidence or never be in control with this mindset because you are essentially saying, "That woman is bigger than me. What she says goes. Her likes are way more important than who I am and what I'm about." You are a chameleon type dude who is always morphing into 'what the women find hot.' You will never have any real confidence doing this because your confidence is dependent on what some woman thinks or what you would imagine her to think. This leads to confidence problems because you will find out real quick that you cannot read minds, and this image you built up based upon what you thought women liked may very well not work, and you will be at the drawing board once again making some new fantasy image to live up to. Ultimately, you will also have problems catching a woman that is FOR YOU because you are never putting YOURSELF out there. You can only keep up a charade for so long and eventually you will revert back to your regular self, so any woman you catch will eventually be exposed to the real you, and it won't be what attracted her in the first place.

Now when you have the mindset of finding a woman that likes what you do, your mindset is that you feel yourself worthy of a high quality woman, and you are going to be yourself and true to who you are and you aren't concerned with 'what the ladies like'. You view your own principles and preferences as WAY higher than what you would perceive 'the ladies to love'.

When you go to the store to buy cologne, you don't go to buy 'what the ladies love', aka that utterly predictable cologne that the rest of the guys in the town were recommended and own. You smell them and you pick the one that makes you say, "Whoa, that's fly right there." You wear the cologne that accentuates YOUR personality. You're not wearing the fad clothes. You are wearing the style that YOU like. Your decisions are quick and crisp because you are not trying to read a woman's mind and act according to what you think will please her. You know what you want and you make the choice based off of who YOU are. In other words, you are blasting yourself and what you represent to the fullest across any and every woman you come across, and if she's not feeling your get-up, you actually thank her for not wasting your time and moving out of the way for the woman that is really about you. When you adopt this mindset, you are VERY confident, because you know what YOU want and your confidence is based upon you living up to and abiding by your principles and not what you imagine a woman to want. When you find a woman using this approach, you will have found one that likes you for YOU, because the bait that you put out there was who you really were, so the man she fell in love with is the man she's going to continually get a better version of because you are always improving. It will be so much more relaxing having a woman who likes you for you because you won't always be second guessing yourself and worrying about what to do next or how you can keep her around, because she will be addicted by your natural self.

 

[sixsixtwo]

The Myth Of The 50/50 Relationship | The Blackdragon Blog

How To Translate Woman Language Into English | The Blackdragon Blog

Myers Briggs and Dating | The Blackdragon Blog

 

[CrossBones]

I cant stand hearing men make excuses and say everything under the sun in order to protect women and their faulty choices. everyone makes mistakes and learns from them, but when you have to hear over and over how its all mens fault, and how men are dogs, youre only hearing a one sided argument. women are coddled and treated like whatever they do is okay, and you just have to accept it. its never their fault, its either society's fault she is irresponsible or because of men.


let them tell it, their fukked up lives never have anything to do with her being a permiscious ho. she "trusted" a man, she was "used" and its like ultimately she had no real say in her situation. shes the victim obviously. with all these freedom of choices and women's rights, we're supposed to think that anything bad that happens to them is not due to their shytty decisions in life.

Ive seen simps act like women can do no wrong, and at the same time hes tricking on some pass arounds, kissing ass to many women, and basing his whole life around chasing more and more women. you have to be picky at this point, as there is a whole lot of fukkery going around, and if youre trying to dive into a big number of women youre inviting ALL of these complications into your life. think, brehs

 

[Kartel13]

So you'd rather hide behind a computer? That doesn't sound like an introvert, sounds like laziness. I'm an introvert so I know how it feels but it seems like you're leaning on this introvert thing a bit too hard tbh.

I was on the same boat as him. I'm an Introvert who rarely approached women. Hell, women approached me more than I approached them. Then I was introduced to the online dating world and it has been for the first couple of years. I got on POF and I was eating left and right.

My thing is that going to clubs/bars got pretty tired. And to be fair, we stopped going to the places that were packed with hoes. We would just go to places to grab a quick drink, vent, and call it a night....and that's normally around midnight.

But the real reason why I say online > real life is you can weed out the women with kids.

 

[Rocket Scientist]

You cats gotta be careful with online dating.Yes I know its the hottest new trend and you can find what you want.However as we see on here and numerous sites people get caaught in lies alot.Im not sayin the average woman you meet doesnt have lies,but searching and practically ORDERING what you want comes with a price.Dont think online is better then meeting a woman randomly.Just be careful brehs.

 

[kevm3]

What's interesting is how most people on blogs or message boards gets INTJ on those Briggs-Meyer tests. Blogs and message boards look like the common hangout spot for that personality type.

 

[Sharp]

Coli fam... I'm currently working on a book based loosely off of my life (dealing with women). A fiction novel.

If you're interested in checking it out a 3 chapter preview. PM me with your e-mail.

 

[re'up]

I know I violated half a dozen unofficial rules of the thread, however, a month or so ago I bought this girl who is 5 years older then me a birthday gift, a few hundred dollar Nordstrom card, I've known her for like 2 years, and I fell for her a few months after I met her, she's in one of my friends immediate family. I've been talking to her casually for that time period, but usually when I see her at work, when I'm with her family, she's said a lot of remarks like 'we should go to the movies', or 'why don't you take ME to these places' little hints like that, called her brother a few times, asking to talk to me late at night to tell me something random, relating to a conversation we had.

I don't know if she is just bored or lonely though, as as her behavior towards me, she doesn't really go out or date, much apparently. And she is older. She might just like the attention? I wrote a short note to her with the gift card, nothing explicit but pretty suggestive as far as my feelings. The last time I saw her, she was kinda stumbling over her words, 'Thank you so much...why did you do that'? I almost came by your house to thank you' (no one had my new number at the time), she shows me these Gucci heels she got with the card, partially anyway, and was (again) saying she never goes out, has nowhere to wear them...I should just ask her out, and say fukk it? She has to have somewhat of an idea how I feel.

As far as the 'simp' side goes, I don't see it like that, I wanted to do something nice for her, I like her that much, if she doesn't feel the same, I still would have wanted to, it was important to me to do that while I have the chance.

 

[TRUEST]

I know I violated half a dozen unofficial rules of the thread, however, a month or so ago I bought this girl who is 5 years older then me a birthday gift, a few hundred dollar Nordstrom card, I've known her for like 2 years, and I fell for her a few months after I met her, she's in one of my friends immediate family. I've been talking to her casually for that time period, but usually when I see her at work, when I'm with her family, she's said a lot of remarks like 'we should go to the movies', or 'why don't you take ME to these places' little hints like that, called her brother a few times, asking to talk to me late at night to tell me something random, relating to a conversation we had.

I don't know if she is just bored or lonely though, as as her behavior towards me, she doesn't really go out or date, much apparently. And she is older. She might just like the attention? I wrote a short note to her with the gift card, nothing explicit but pretty suggestive as far as my feelings. The last time I saw her, she was kinda stumbling over her words, 'Thank you so much...why did you do that'? I almost came by your house to thank you' (no one had my new number at the time), she shows me these Gucci heels she got with the card, partially anyway, and was (again) saying she never goes out, has nowhere to wear them...I should just ask her out, and say fukk it? She has to have somewhat of an idea how I feel.

As far as the 'simp' side goes, I don't see it like that, I wanted to do something nice for her, I like her that much, if she doesn't feel the same, I still would have wanted to, it was important to me to do that while I have the chance.

my reading comprehension must be horrendous because what i got from this was there's a girl who likes u and who wants to fucck u. u like her too. ur in love with her, but ur scared to fucck, even though she has a sign that says "insert d1ck here" on her forehead? with arrows on her cheek pointing to her mouth?

im going to sleep. maybe i'll get the true meaning of ur post when i wake up.

 

[Two Stacks]

I know I violated half a dozen unofficial rules of the thread, however, a month or so ago I bought this girl who is 5 years older then me a birthday gift, a few hundred dollar Nordstrom card, I've known her for like 2 years, and I fell for her a few months after I met her, she's in one of my friends immediate family. I've been talking to her casually for that time period, but usually when I see her at work, when I'm with her family, she's said a lot of remarks like 'we should go to the movies', or 'why don't you take ME to these places' little hints like that, called her brother a few times, asking to talk to me late at night to tell me something random, relating to a conversation we had.

I don't know if she is just bored or lonely though, as as her behavior towards me, she doesn't really go out or date, much apparently. And she is older. She might just like the attention? I wrote a short note to her with the gift card, nothing explicit but pretty suggestive as far as my feelings. The last time I saw her, she was kinda stumbling over her words, 'Thank you so much...why did you do that'? I almost came by your house to thank you' (no one had my new number at the time), she shows me these Gucci heels she got with the card, partially anyway, and was (again) saying she never goes out, has nowhere to wear them...I should just ask her out, and say fukk it? She has to have somewhat of an idea how I feel.

As far as the 'simp' side goes, I don't see it like that, I wanted to do something nice for her, I like her that much, if she doesn't feel the same, I still would have wanted to, it was important to me to do that while I have the chance.

i still dont know why u got her something that was a "few hundred" dollars.

but why are u not fukking her right now what are you scared of?