Essential Quick Lil Gems on Dealing with Women

[Mr Hate Coffee]

Morning gem...
I just wanna say at times when you think to yourself. "Hmmm... I wonder how my ex is doing? Maybe I should hit her up." You probably shouldn't.

I'm going to break you cats off another bar of this realism. When you go about choosing women, you have to pick amongst the ones that CHOOSE YOU FIRST. In other words, she's shown definite interest in you without you having to do anything to impress her. For the most part, a woman likes you without you even speaking to her. Once you've past the bar of the 'unspoken like,' then you must make sure you only increase her desire and not decrease it.

The KEY knowledge you need to have in your mind when dealing with women is her behavior matters most. She must treat you like the man that is above her. If not, you will always be frustrated with her, chasing her around, etc. A woman that is truly about you WILL find the way to make time for you. She WILL respond to you promptly. She will be respectful to you because she doesn't want to lose you.

Where a lot of guys lose is they want to choose the woman instead of having her choose him first. They go out and start to deal with some woman they like, but she doesn't necessarily like him. In that scenario, she has the advantage. You like her more than she likes you, and then you start working to get in her graces and try to make her like you. Just based off of that small information, how can you be considered the boss when you're the one doing the working? Like I said before, it requires emotional discipline. You will come across many women that you really like, but you have to learn to dismiss them if they don't really like you... otherwise you will put yourself in a losing position where you are trying to impress the woman and get in her graces... and you will end up never impressing her because women want BOSSES, not BUTLERS. When you start working for a woman, to impress her or start doing her all of these favors, when you become a common butler to her. You will never get the respect of a boss by doing such. Control your likes and refuse to deal with women that you like more than they like you. It's difficult, but once you get into a habit of doing it, it will save you a ton of trouble.

This has pretty much always been my mantra. I like whoever likes me. It makes things sooooo much simpler. I fukking hate chasing women. It's a delicate balance because a chick that is too thirsty is a turnoff. I like ones who make it clear they have an interest but are confident enough to back off and let me pursue at that point.

 

[Mr Hate Coffee]

Yeah, it's funny because I noticed you liked my post a week or so ago and so I was wondering "wow, he's reading back a few pages" but you're just now commenting on my post so were you in denial until now? It's funny man, because it's not the feeling of hate but instead the feeling of exhausted love, but yeah man. Do your thing.

Miles Davis - Something I dreamed last night - YouTube

LOL. It's hella hard to keep up with this thread. So sometimes I'll read a post and not get around to replying to it until a week later.

 

[Mr Hate Coffee]

Aight brehs sorry for the Monday morning bombing of the thread but this shyt is therapeutic and I need to put it down somewhere.

So I been thinking about my last relationship for awhile and here's what I've realized. Maybe others can learn from it.

The mistakes I made before the relationship:
-The first restaurant I took her out to eat at was Ruby Tuesday. She responds to my courtesy with "I usually go to swankier spots than this." RED FLAG. Should've bailed then.

-She arrived three hours late to a homemade dinner I made with no phone call. I should have deaded it then. But I gave her a pass like a simp. Had me sitting at the dinner table lookin like one of the ladies in Waiting to Exhale

-She constantly was making me open car doors for her like a butler. (This eventually got deaded) http://www.the-coli.com/locker-room...w-girl-over-%93opening-car-door%94-thing.html

-I was still in love with my ex but got into a relationship anyway like , what's the worst that can happen.


The mistakes I made during the relationship:
-She was generally a terrible listener. Our conversations were terrible. I let it slide on some "Oh that's how relationships are supposed to be. Men don't talk to their women." No, this is false.

-She snapped on me in front of her friend. (Never take this kind of disrespect. It was dealt with when the friend left but the fact it happened is a no-no)

-She had a SUPREME princess complex and wanted to be spoiled. As a result she never paid for anything.

-I told her I believed in reciprocity and she laughed.




Mistakes I'm making now (after the relationship):
-I look at the past with rose colored glasses and prop her up to crazy levels. ("Oh she was a model, she was light skinned, she had natural hair, plus she liked to go to church. It's wasn't THAT bad. We could've worked it out!")

Lessons Learned:

Honestly the biggest lesson I learned is not to enter a relationship unless the person truly fits what YOU want. Don't make exceptions to your principles. And save yourself some time and do NOT ignore red flags when you see them early. Also, if you still got baggage don't enter another relationship. It's not fair to you or the other person involved.


Glad i got that off my chest. now I can go to work.

 

[kevm3]

It's easy to deal with women because we want a trophy woman... aka she is very fine, which causes us to overlook a lot of necessary traits. That's how a lot of us get caught up.

 

[Medio]

lol @ that car door shyt . that's funny.

man the girl you were dating mrhatecoffee i'd never date a girl like that, such a turn off

i'll hold open a door but not gonna open the car door unless its like a honeymoon or some shyt
the fact she never payed for anything smh

you was caught up hard lol

 

[Sharp]

We never talk about this much, but let me drop some jewels for the fellas who already have kids.

Never stay with a woman because you have a kid with her. You have to constantly ask yourself "If we didn't have a kid, would I tolerate this behavior? Would I be happy? Would I have any reason to stay with her?"

There are women out there that will trap you with a kid, especially if you are a good man. If you exhibit the type of character that demonstrates that you are family orientated, and will stay for the sake of the kid, she will take advantage of you.

I'm not saying to not be family orientated. But what I am saying is to come to terms with the reality that you can be a good parent, role model, and provide a family atmosphere to your child without staying with the woman.

Don't become a prisoner to a relationship because you have a child with a woman and you want to do the right thing. You will be depriving yourself of the relationship you are supposed to have, and it will ultimately affect your relationship with your child. You have to be happy in all aspects of your life. Sacrifice is senseless, if you don't get anything from it.

 

[Huellz Santana]

 

[sixsixtwo]

The War Against Men

 

[George Gooney]

@George Gooney

I was merely speculating on what you had posted, no need for the ad-hominem. I cannot take you seriously anymore, welcome to my ignore list.

Let me explain something to you negroes! I only come at you ruthlessly if I feel you're disrespecting me! As a man, you telling me that "I already lost" implies you know my life and my experiences and that you're in a situation to school me as a man. WATCH YOUR TONE you could've framed your statement a lot differently and I would've came at you accordingly but you wanted to puff up your chest and try to flex on another grown man which I don't allow. I don't let women or other men disrespect me which is why I dealt with you in that manner. Notice I never have any problems with the other brothers in this thread like @His_Excellence_Reincar neither brother @kevm3! Only you new disrespectful negroes who clearly don't operate by a manlike code of honor and respect. So for future reference just know that i'm a man and i'm not for the Bull. This goes for you and the Pedophile negro that dapped your post. WATCH YOUR TONE

 

[DaRealness]

been there had a blast, resorts are mostly filled with Argentinians, brazillians, and few cdns and americans


get some mamajuana
do the safari excursion

Yeah I plan to have mad fun and go on at least four excursions while I'm there.

Originally I intended to go to Cape Verde but it was fully booked up which was a major disappointment. I've actually been to DR North Coast before on my honeymoon so it wasn't my first choice, but cuba was too expensive and there weren't that many good alternatives.

The good thing about travelling by yourself is you get to do whatever you want, when you want and don't have to answer to anybody. I wouldn't even do those 'singles' breaks. It may get a lil lonely at times, but that's just how it is. It's my first proper holiday by myself so I look forward to seeing how things pan out.

where did you book the trip from breh? In need of a vacau badly but need a good price

Through Thomas Cook, but just do a search because you can get some good deals between now and the start of summer.

lucky b*stard @DaRealness is gonna be getting dominican p*ssy every day in his face

You know what, breh, not too long ago I would have thought the same thing, but I'm mainly just trying to rejuvenate and work on myself. Don't get me wrong, if I meet a fly hotel worker or a local, I won't say no....but I'm not gonna go out my way for it. This is strictly 'me time' without any distractions. If anything happens though, you know I'll keep this thread updated.

breh your gonna have a blast trust me when i went to dominican i was living it up

the women workers at the resort as well


edits out the gawds face

Indeed. Last time I was there, there was this BAD ASS chick who served as a waitress in the main hall. If the equivalent gave me some play, then....

 

[Turbulent]

how do you guys feel about when you fukked up/fronted on a girl?

 

[George Gooney]

how do you guys feel about when you fukked up/fronted on a girl?

Elaborate a little breh this question interests me.

 

[Liquid]

how do you guys feel about when you fukked up/fronted on a girl?

leave that fronting shyt up to the females, be as open and honest as possible.

 

[Liquid]

Haven't participated in this thread in a while, but a few things have developed over the past couple of months that have brought things to light once again.

Now a lot of you cats in here are in your late teens to early 20's and there are a couple of things you need to realize before you end up like many people my age. @kevm3 already pointed out financial freedom and I won't touch up on that too much. I think something that is important to realize is that you don't NEED expensive nice looking clothes to leave a good impression, but dressing nice does help. Think about the difference and understand that nice looking threads don't necessarily have to be expensive. Another thing about financial freedom is to set a goal for yourself. Start out by calculating how much your monthly expenses are and dump it into a savings account...build that up to at least a year's worth and then start to look into letting that money work for you whether it be interest gained or financial ventures. I would say 20K in savings is a good number to start at.

As far as women are concerned? I don't have much new to add, but one of my friends is about to get a break into the industry and the old birds are starting to chirp at him now. It's kinda hilarious how the cycle works, but I was on the phone with him for 2 hours the other day and reminded him to stay focused. He has been busting his ass for 6+ years and the old birds never chirped, a little buzz and now the text messages and ringtones are popping off. It's so depressing in fact that a model/actress requested me on Facebook just because of our close friendship...the agenda is clear and evident.

You guys are going to have a whole lot of temptations in your mid 20's, make sure you think wisely about what you are getting yourself into. I recently had to cut someone off completely because I just noticed that the direction of both our lives since the high school days has spread way far apart. Can it change in the future? Possibly, but highly unlikely.

These are tough decisions to make for everyone, but don't fall into the trap that many fall into thinking that you can help change someone change their life around. People generally change when they are ready to do so. You can push a little and try to see how you can help, but there comes a time in where you and the partner must realize that you are not seeing eye to eye and might be best to cut it off. Don't look at it from the point of not being loyal or sticking it out, rather setting each other free to avoid the aggravation down the line. They might not realize it at that time, but you are probably doing them a favor.

The bolded has come to full light, its clear she wants in the circle and is now "friends" with everyone in the family and the inner circle. She knows we are all the creative type with active minds putting things together. Why is this important? Because its a clear reminder that you need to focus on your goals before anything else. This is a bad broad brehs, a female who would have never added/talked or even glanced at any of us before one of us started making moves. Now that the names are moving up ladder? She texts frequently, she sends ME messages and I haven't even met her face to face yet

My brehs I didn't even know how to pronounce her name and asked my friend who the fukk that was when she requested me

She is dying to get into that inner circle and a power move to gain whatever leverage she can solely based on her looks. Its a rough cycle out there, but we all see the game and recognize whats going on. Two of my boys out in Cali had contacted with her previously, but its a whole different ball game now. All because some recognition is being thrown around. Its hilarious how someone is so much more attractive/interesting to these females once a buzz is spreading.

This is viewing a relationship in terms of what you can potentially gain and worry about the rest later on. So many women in this country do this and we slip because it is in our nature to take care of them, its what we were taught growing up and see the continuation of that message with movies and other forms of media.

 

[Turbulent]

Elaborate a little breh this question interests me.

won't go into too much details but basically i feel like chick fronted on me a little bit, gave me the run around so i stopped messing with her. then she contacted me and we both acted as if nothing happened (where i feel like i fukked up). What she did annoyed me but i acted like i wasn't even phased (playing the game?).

also what if you fronted on a girl (acted like you were too cool, got a little cocky or whatever) and then you realized you kinda fukked up. Again on one hand i feel like you should be real enough to recognize your wrong and keep it real but at the same time when you keep it real you shouldn't be giving her your balls...or maybe we should just press eject and charge it to the game? what if both people kinda messed up?