Essential Quick Lil Gems on Dealing with Women

Digital Omen

Digital Omen

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WIA20XX said:
If a chick knows how to take a good photo, she's getting all the attention, dates, and whatever else she wants.
It was like that in the 90's/00's, but it's only gone 10X.

They were miserable then, but they are more miserable now.

This is an old chart. (the numbers don't add up to 100%)

But it's striking. Most folks was not meeting online and not really meeting in the clubs/bars.
Now, folks are primarily meeting through online, with clubs/bars as second.



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This shyt is mad real

I'm :flabbynsick: and met my ex-wife through family (she worked with my cousin)
My first love back in HS, through a mutual friend (about the only time "I wanna introduce you to..." actually worked...but we were kids, can't really count)
Couple of other serious GFs in my 20s: one at Ultra (guess that would fall under club/bar/whatever) and the other through a friend
GF after I got divorced: mutual friend we went to college with
Current GF: a book reading event.

Never met a relationship type girl online. My era was AIM/MySpace, strictly jump offs where I was living like Jeru "snatch off my hat wash my dikk and KIM"
By the time apps rolled around I was married. When I got divorced I got on Hinge and got used for free meals and ghosted afterwards, so deleted that shyt
 
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re'up

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Just using your for example, not trying to argue, or change an opinion, but the idea that you will be used for "resources and food"

even the wording is like prehistoric! to me, we are all using each other for things we desire, sometimes it's mutually aligned and sometimes it's not

anyone using me for more than I am comfortable with, simply isn't a concern to me. That's why I like these convos, because I would never think that way, it's insightful to see other's perspectives.

@Mufasa Ahadi
 
Ahadi

Ahadi

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re'up said:
Just using your for example, not trying to argue, or change an opinion, but the idea that you will be used for "resources and food"

even the wording is like prehistoric! to me, we are all using each other for things we desire, sometimes it's mutually aligned and sometimes it's not

anyone using me for more than I am comfortable with, simply isn't a concern to me. That's why I like these convos, because I would never think that way, it's insightful to see other's perspectives.

@Mufasa Ahadi
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Oh no, I’m no arguing at all either. It’s an interesting point of view.

I just think someone should earn thing, before revealing spots or information.

I don’t know many women who kept in contact with me after we figured out the dynamics didn’t benefit us. But some still follow me on Instagram.
 
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re'up

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Mufasa Ahadi said:
Oh no, I’m no arguing at all either. It’s an interesting point of view.

I just think someone should earn thing, before revealing spots or information.

I don’t know many women who kept in contact with me after we figured out the dynamics didn’t benefit us. But some still follow me on Instagram.
Click to expand...

For example, someone I haven't SEEN in person for about 6 months hit me up last week, sent some pics, I get like a full body dopamine rush when her and I are together, for days after, there's no way I would ignore that because of some self imposed code about "standards"

we have done this dance back and forth for years. And it's not only her, but that's a good example. At worst, she is guilty of soft ghsting such a lame term, but we all know what it means, but, she must have had her reasons. I don't take it personally. We all have options. and the thing is, even if's just one night, or three, I'm down, why would I not be? But people who think "all or nothing" would feel like this is a waste of my time.
 
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Ohene

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re'up said:
That's fair, and true, I also would point to this being similar idea as "expecting people to do exactly what you want, when you want it is unrealistic", not everyone is ready or open for that connection when you are. Sometimes people lack grace. Especially through a text message.

Often, it all switches around.

and also someone with the mindset of "no wasted time", is going to see things different than me.
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Thats why i implore men to think of saying like playing a game of whacamole

You sit back and hit what ever pops Up when it does. Don’t try to force the moles to rise and dont just Sit there waiting for them when they go back or stay down. Just be opportunistic when they come up and continue to keep an eye out for other, higher value ones in your peripheral

Anything else is thirsty on one side of the spectrum and resentful on the other side of the spectrum
 
RealAssanova

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re'up said:
Part of it is having a genuine bond or connection, if you really have contempt or don't care about these people, this doesn't really work. I actually like all these people. Whether we have slept together or not, whether they ghosted me 6 months ago, whatever, they are all good with me. I have a dinner tonight at some new omakse place, 10 course meal, ill send pics to at least one person, because I know she would love it. Probably send to like 4 people. It's a sincere thing. Sometimes that sparks that convo and you end up in person, sometimes it's just the thought, and you move on. Then that person hits you up, and before you know it, you are trying to decide whose place to go to. I may want a date somewhere, and just randomly hit up someone, and they are like YES.

Partly, I never never realized how many people, men and women, were taking a "take no prisoners" approach to the whole thing, as in, if you are not 100% down for me RIGHT NOW, you are out/over/done. I think a lot of that is just ego, but for those who really want to get married, it makes some sense.

Romances and friendships can span lifetimes, if you just give them room to breathe.
Click to expand...

Its one thing if me and a woman had a mutual and amicable agreement to part ways and she comes back…but its another if me and a woman are gettin to know each other and she ghosts randomly/flakes on a date with no rescheduling/just seeks attention and then tries to come back.

The former i’d be slightly open to letting her back in. The latter, no.
 
International Playa

International Playa

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WIA20XX said:
If a chick knows how to take a good photo, she's getting all the attention, dates, and whatever else she wants.
It was like that in the 90's/00's, but it's only gone 10X.

They were miserable then, but they are more miserable now.

This is an old chart. (the numbers don't add up to 100%)

But it's striking. Most folks was not meeting online and not really meeting in the clubs/bars.
Now, folks are primarily meeting through online, with clubs/bars as second.



20822.jpeg
Click to expand...
Fairly accurate study, most of my serious relationships, I met the women through friends. Only one relationship I met her online. All my 1 nightstands were from online & clubs.
 
International Playa

International Playa

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