Essential Quick Lil Gems on Dealing with Women

Snoopy Loops

Snoopy Loops

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Im in a quandary. I've been dating my current girl for 6 months or so and I've started to see a trend that has me questioning the long term viability. She has this habit of assuming the worst in a situation and then accusing of me stuff before getting the full story. I cant stand being wrongly accused so sometimes I go from being apologetic to being angry when it seems she's not acknowledging that there was no ill-intent, which can make the conflict worse.

I know i have a responsibility to ensure things dont escalate, but I only have 2 strategies: 1) apologizing once and letting her trip if she's not satisfied; 2) appeasement approach which entails accepting responsibility even if i know i didnt do all what shes accusing me of. The annoying part is that its generally about silly shyt, like her thinking im ignoring her cuz my phone is on focus mode, even when its on that setting by mistake.

The issue with strategy 1 is that she'll follow up by saying i dont take her feelings seriously. The issue with strategy 2 is that it suggests i have to be content with assuming the role as a villain, which is something i'm accustomed to. Im not sure how embedded in her character this trait is. I want to empathize that this could be due to living hostile environments in her youth, but on the flip, whenever she does it, it dampens my attraction to her.
 
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International Playa

International Playa

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Tommy Lee Jones said:
anyone using IG as a dating site? I haven't, not sure how you even go about that? They already got the upper hand when you message random women. Unless you're famous and shyt.
Click to expand...

The original idea of Facebook & social media was it was supposed to be kinda like a dating app for students at university campus to meet new people

Go ahead & use IG as a dating site. You just need amazing pics.
 
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internetexplorer said:
Need some advice... Got a coworker who's 24, I'm 40, I but look like I'm 30. Anyways, she's beautiful, smart, funny, cool, she's dope! She asked me to go to the club with her and her female cousin a few months ago, and since then, we hang out frequently, and do all the things a couple would do, but our relationship has been completely platonic. Folks at work started questioning her about us being in a relationship, and hating on us being so close, which has caused us to become even closer friends.

The problem that I'm having is that I've grown to love her, and want to be more than friends. Obviously neither of us are in a relationship, but I know that if she were to get a boyfriend, I'd be salty as hell, and would probably stop dealing with her. Should I tell her how I feel?
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Yea tell her how you fell, but the age difference is going to be a factor. I'm just being straight up with you
 
International Playa

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internetexplorer said:
Need some advice... Got a coworker who's 24, I'm 40, I but look like I'm 30. Anyways, she's beautiful, smart, funny, cool, she's dope! She asked me to go to the club with her and her female cousin a few months ago, and since then, we hang out frequently, and do all the things a couple would do, but our relationship has been completely platonic. Folks at work started questioning her about us being in a relationship, and hating on us being so close, which has caused us to become even closer friends.

The problem that I'm having is that I've grown to love her, and want to be more than friends. Obviously neither of us are in a relationship, but I know that if she were to get a boyfriend, I'd be salty as hell, and would probably stop dealing with her. Should I tell her how I feel?
Click to expand...


That's why it's important to let your intentions known very earlier on, so you don't end up in a friendzone "grey area".

Life is short, let your intentions known & see how it goes. You never know, she might be frustrated, wondering why you haven't made a move on her.
 
BrehWyatt

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Snoopy Loops said:
Im in a quandary. I've been dating my current girl for 6 months or so and I've started to see a trend that has me questioning the long term viability. She has this habit of assuming the worst in a situation and then accusing of me stuff before getting the full story. I cant stand being wrongly accused so sometimes I go from being apologetic to being angry when it seems she's not acknowledging that there was no ill-intent, which can make the conflict worse.

I know i have a responsibility to ensure things dont escalate, but I only have 2 strategies: 1) apologizing once and letting her trip if she's not satisfied; 2) appeasement approach which entails accepting responsibility even if i know i didnt do all what shes accusing me of. The annoying part is that its generally about silly shyt, like her thinking im ignoring her cuz my phone is on focus mode, even when its on that setting by mistake.

The issue with strategy 1 is that she'll follow up by saying i dont take her feelings seriously. The issue with strategy 2 is that it suggests i have to be content with assuming the role as a villain, which is something i'm accustomed to. Im not sure how embedded in her character this trait is. I want to empathize that this could be due to living hostile environments in her youth, but on the flip, whenever she does it, it dampens my attraction to her.
Click to expand...

Sit her down, explain that said habit is unacceptable and try to find out where it is rooted. Hear her out, be genuine. Regardless, make sure the conversation is left with an EXPLICITLY CLEAR AND MUTUAL UNDERSTANDING that if there isn't a noticeable attempt to eliminate/curb said habit (i.e. she's down to her last strike), then you're done.

Stand on your word, and if/when she steps out of line a month or two down the line, move on.
 
Rell Lauren

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Any good bars in Brooklyn? Met someone on Bumble and we're going to get drinks before seeing if there's any chemistry. Going to hit the Basquiat exhibit if we hit it off.
 
Regular Developer

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BujuBoombastic said:
Went to the eye doctor today
Saw a young Hispanic simp around my age bought food for a thick Hispanic receptionist telling her to not pay him
Shorty and her other co worker were snickering about it after he left to eat
:pachaha:
He gon learn the hard way being too nice
:wow:
Click to expand...
How old is everybody in this story, if you're able to tell?
 
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